Cars I don't "get". Add yours!

[Polystratus]

Anyone noticed that most of those Toyota Pious shitheaps are driven at 90+ on the motorway?

 

Been on the M1 recently then? These things are very often in lane 3 (or 4 depending on which section) flat out, can't you tell they're company cars! Someone on another car forum was using every wanky eco argument to say how very green these cars are because he brought a new one to replace his 18 month old car, very eco aware.

 

Had a look at a Auris hybrid last year that was on display at Bakewell show, it had its bonnet open, a quick look and no thanks, can't see that very fine complex wiring in there taking well to British winters, and Toyota thought it a good idea to stuff the brake fluid res right back that you need very thin fingers to unscrew the cap.

[fiatdaft]

not being funny,but i would rather have the equivilent astra mark 2 to the escort mark 5, as they were on sale for the same time, for a short period anyway!

[pogweasel]

Prius attracts 0% company car tax, I believe.

[eddyramrod]

I don’t 'get' Morris Minor’s either. The British Beetle. They leave me all feeling cold. Actually, the old VW Beetle and it's retained popularity in some circles. There's another one which leaves me asking "Why?". Horrible, rattly, unbelievably noisy, sluggish and odd looking things. It's a similar story with the old VW Type 2 Camper. Not in terms of looks, but air cooled engines? No thanks. They just don't float my boat at all.

 

BMW Minis? No thanks. The same goes for most BMW’s. Particularly Chris Bangle’s blind efforts. I didn’t like them when they were new and I still think they’re ugly, bloated looking things now.

 

Thank goodness, I thought I was in a minority of one! You can see why I would think that: any old-car event will be packed with MMs and VWs, and there are at least a dozen modern BMWs on every street in the world.

[Negative Creep]

I don't like Minors either. No particular reason as I've never driven one, they just do nothing for me

[M'coli]

I've never understood the popularity and regular appraisal of the MK2 Cavalier...

 

me either,

 

I had a couple when they were current,

but it never occurred to me that it might be able to do 100mph in 3rd before the valves started to bounce

 

It was OK and time has been very kind to the china green saloon

Valve bounce or hydraulic lifter pump-up?

[Timewaster]

not being funny,but i would rather have the equivilent astra mark 2 to the escort mark 5

 

Correct. Owning either of these cars would not be funny.

[Negative Creep]

As much as I prefer Fords I will admit the mk.5 was pure shit and I'd rather have the Astra

[dollywobbler]

I 'get' Morris Minors, I just don't want to own one. Too slow and flimsy for me (yes, a 2CVer!). I actually quite like Beetles - I've only driven a few, but a pre-Super Beetle 1300 was really rather pleasant. It felt tough and I liked it a lot. Wouldn't buy one just because they're overpriced (though you could say the same about 2CVs - not true when I first got into them...)

 

I don't really get all the fuss about Mk2 Golfs. Yes, they're competent but they're not really any tougher than anything else (that really was clever marketing) and are, well, a bit bland and germanic really.

[Pete-M]

As much as I prefer Fords I will admit the mk.5 was pure shit and I'd rather have the Astra

 

The Mk5 RS2000 was a splendid piece of kit. The rest were shite though.

 

As for the Disastra, the GTEs were quick in a straight line but dire everywhere else. 'Cooking' ones could be ok, but it was a matter of luck whether they were ok or awful.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Oh I don't know, Mark 5 Scrotes weren't THAT bad. I worked for a Ford dealer in the early nineties (Skippers Darlington) and drove a few. The ordinary CVH ones were bland and unadvernturous but they were no better/worse than the Mark 3 Rolfs or Ashtrays. I always thought the original Mark 5 from 1990/1 as a three door was quite a neat bit of styling. The 130bhp XR3i was okay and the later (92 on?) Zetec powered Scorts were not bad at all. The late Si with the Cosseh style wheels were pretty well sorted. I'd never been seen dead in one however - definitley mouth breather wheels now.

 

The RS2000 was indeed a fine car. I never drove a 4x4 though. Any good?

[Cavcraft]

I have a theory about the popularity of the Mk2 Cavaliers, and I'm pretty sure it applies to other cars too.

 

The Mk2 was a million times better than the Mk1 in probably all departments. Better built, nicer to drive and seemed (at the time) all the things a revamped car should be, i.e much better than the previous model.

They are accredited with 'saving' Vauxhall as they were incredibly popular cars and (again like lots of other cars) are probably quite well reagrded these days because a) they were always seen about on the roads and loads of them were company cars so people have memories of their dad/uncle/whoever taking them on holiday in them etc. Right in the middle of Vauxhall's dull era though where they seemed to just make adequate cars rather than anything exciting or fancy.

 

Like I say that can apply to any similar sort of car really, especially anything that sold in numbers such as the Sierra and Mongdeo.

 

The Mk2 Astra is my least favourite of the lot. They seem to rust far better than any other 'Mk' Astra and a fair few had that special lacquer peel paintwork Vauxhall somehow managed to engineer in.

[mattblack]

This...

 

 

I'm sure it's very reliable and practical but it sums up blandness in one picture.

 

The moast uninspired piece of design since the Vectra B.

 

I drive a few of these quite regularly. They're as uninspiring to drive as they are to look at . The ones I drive are top spec ones and they're still spectacularly dull. Nothing at all about them that will make someone grin. They're competent, they do the job, and they're fairly reliable, but they're not good at anything other than being a minicab.

 

They do ride reasonably well, and they're ok for motorway work, but they're no fun at all. Ever. Far better than a Vectra, but still shite.

 

Ford Ka.

 

Horrifically ugly, shit, rattly engines and all the appeal (to me) of a white dog turd.

 

They handle superbly though, much better than anything else that size that I can think of.

 

 

HOLD THE FRONT PAGE!! ORDINARY FAMILY HATCHBACK IN 'NOT LIKE A FERARRI' SHOCK!!!

[Guest]

I don't get the Benz Patent Motorwagen, it's just a Horsey Horseless but with one less wheel and no horse head.

[chaseracer]

 

 

[Negative Creep]

I don't get the Benz Patent Motorwagen, it's just a Horsey Horseless but with one less wheel and no horse head.

 

 

You need to get with the times, 3 wheels are the future of motorised transportation

[RoadworkUK]

 

I've driven them, I have mates who own them. They're fast (or can be made to be), chuckable, reliable (if you don't do anything too stupid to them) and practical.

 

And I hate them. Chiefly because of the stupid "me too" following where every Turbo 2000 gets dressed in full WRX regalia, exhausts are louder than a full-chat rally stage and every time you see one on the road it's doing 70 on a housing estate. So, Imagewise, I hate it.

 

Also, car-wise, I hate it too. It looks like, well, an Impreza 1.6GL with a bodykit. Because it is. The interior feels like every Pacific Rim car to issue forth since the mid 80's, and it generally gives you no pleasure whatsoever unless you're wringing its neck.

 

Serious piece of kit it might be. But so's an AK47 and I certainly wouldn't give one of those to anyone living in Essex...

[Angrydicky]

^^I was actually thinking about how much I hate those earlier today, I was out in the Cambridge and everywhere I went there were tattooed skinhead morons doing 100mph in their drainpipe exhausted twatmobiles. And most were those, either Imprezas or Skylines. They sound so horrible, there's one that goes racing up and down my street everyday with one of those crappy 'dump valves' which goes off every time the knuckle dragger changes gear (at stupid rpm). So dreadfully uncouth for an Austin Cambridge driver

[Pete-M]

I quite like them when they're well set up. Standard looking one with 300 bhp and sorted brakes would do me though, preferably a late Mk1 manual estate in a dark metallic with leather and AC.

 

I keep thinking I should try one for six months or so, but whenever I see them on ebay etc the majority seem to be owned by knuckle draggers.

[RoadworkUK]

That's exactly the problem. I daresay if it wasn't for the percieved twattishness I could probably enjoy one. Maybe in 10 years time they'll enjoy a renaissance like un-chavved, non-ruined Sierra Cossies have.

[Cavcraft]

The other (negative) things about Impreza turbos is that they usually end up with Chinese dragon seat covers and everyone selling one claims their's is putting out eleven million horsepower but don't have the rolling road print out to prove it.

[RoadworkUK]

... putting out eleven million horsepower...

 

S'got a tuning chip M8 INNIT?!

[forddeliveryboy]

Pacific Rim. Good term. These ones always dump you in the sh when you're near the limit. Little warning, you're gone.

[Negative Creep]

I want a Legacy twin turbo, that way I can enjoy the car without people thinking I've stolen it. Then again, a Forester turbo would be a great Q car.............

[RoadworkUK]

....Legacy twin turbo............

 

I spent a few days the other year with a Legacy, non-turbo, 6 cylinder estate. And I absolutely loved it. Yes please.

[Justin Case]

[Guest]

 

Golfs are okay, but only the Mark 5/6. The Mark 5 was a very good car and the Mark 6 is simply superb.

 

OK mate, could you make this comment live for me? I've driven quite a few Mark 5s and 6s, and none of them struck me as worthy of the praise heaped on them.

 

What do they do that makes them so special? I couldn't see it, not even after running one for a couple of days on an extended test drive. The salesman reckoned I'd be 'a dead cert' after taking it away for 48 hours. I wasn't. He was stunned. Apparently I was the first person not to be 'really impressed' with what I was given to try. But then he would say that.

 

It was weird though. I had work colleagues getting very excited indeed that I was trying a 'proper, really posh car' whereas all I could see was a bland hatchback with wonky trim and misaligned panels. The Mk 6 I tried was nearly £17k and the centre console moved and the glovebox didn't shut right. VW started this 'build quality obsession' in their marketing, so if they're going to shovel it down everyone's throats, I'm holding them to it. You might think I'm being trivial, but I'm paying that much for a boring German car I expect the damn thing to be perfect, carry on being perfect, and need nothing but tyres and servicing for at least four years.

 

I took it on a variety of roads and motorways and nothing it did blew me away, as I was led to believe. The handling was fine, but not awe inspiring. The interior was okay, but not amazing, and not that well made if I'm honest. The boot wasn't that big. It wasn't that quick considering it should have had 140 brake and a shitload of torque. There wasn't that much room in the back. It wasn't that good on fuel, the gearchange was OK and the brakes were average. The visibility, especially from the rear, was crap. Seriously, am I missing something? It just seemed like an up specced Focus with a ridiculously ambitious price tag to me.

The comment that most irritates me when I hear it about VAG stuff is : 'Well, they're quality cars.' What does this even mean?

 

Motha_Wat has ordered an Audi A1. I'm going to be watching how it performs very closely indeed. If anything falls off it or goes slightly wrong, I will be very amused, because it will confirm what I suspected all along - VAG cars are painfully average things, very cleverly marketed.

[RoadworkUK]

 

The absolute gospel truth.

 

+2xn∞

 

That there was as realistic a review that the Golf could ever recieve.

[fordperv]

Oh I don't know, Mark 5 Scrotes weren't THAT bad. I worked for a Ford dealer in the early nineties (Skippers Darlington) and drove a few. The ordinary CVH ones were bland and unadvernturous but they were no better/worse than the Mark 3 Rolfs or Ashtrays. I always thought the original Mark 5 from 1990/1 as a three door was quite a neat bit of styling. The 130bhp XR3i was okay and the later (92 on?) Zetec powered Scorts were not bad at all. The late Si with the Cosseh style wheels were pretty well sorted. I'd never been seen dead in one however - definitley mouth breather wheels now.

 

The RS2000 was indeed a fine car. I never drove a 4x4 though. Any good?

 

 

Sorry to be picky here but it was the escort gti's that came with the escy cos style rims, the 1996 mk6 si came with the mk6 rs2000 rim and the 1997 onwards si came with the fugly finesse wheels, the 4x4 rs 2000 is a rare little beasty now, they are alrite a little underpowered tho and a pain in the arse when the transfer box breaks and you cant get 1 lol

[Jozza]

The handling was fine, but not awe inspiring. The interior was okay, but not amazing, and not that well made if I'm honest. The boot wasn't that big. It wasn't that quick considering it should have had 140 brake and a shitload of torque. There wasn't that much room in the back. It wasn't that good on fuel, the gearchange was OK and the brakes were average. The visibility, especially from the rear, was crap. Seriously, am I missing something? It just seemed like an up specced Focus with a ridiculously ambitious price tag to me.

The comment that most irritates me when I hear it about VAG stuff is : 'Well, they're quality cars.' What does this even mean?

.........

VAG cars are painfully average things, very cleverly marketed.

 

Spot on. VAG won their reputation back in the 70s/80s by being 'better than average' at a time when the average standard in the European car industry wasn't that great. The marketing people relentlessly pushed the line that they were vastly superior in terms of engineering and build quality, that they were a 'premium product' and that paying huge amounts for options that were standard on many other cars was a good thing. Repeat the line over 25+ years, let all the journalists and TV presenters keep pushing the same line as well and people will believe it regardless of evidence to the contrary.

 

I know several people who have bought new VW Group products (who doesn't?) and a surprising number of them have been riddled with faults both electrical and mechanical. These are always breezily dismissed by the owner as a 'one off' and you can be sure that it will be another VW product replacing the faulty car in 3 years time. Marketing works and can be used to cover huge flaws in a company's product if used well and VW have been masters at it for decades.