Grogee's spannering (Maestro , Corsa & Avensis). FONDLE MY PARTNER

[grogee]

BiL's van (05 Trafic) has steering issue. Says it doesn't 'feel right' and steering no longer self-centres. We both suspect pump.

Trouble is I really CBA doing it even though he'll pay mate's rates £40/hr. The van is a total heap, 200k miles, airbag light on and wires chopped around pretensioners (dunno what the story is and don't care). It's filthy in the engine bay because the crank seal was leaking (now fixed).

He also wants me to do glow plugs which will also be a complete PITA, bodged wiring and all sorts of shit missing under the bonnet. 

He's about to sell some land and get a 'proper' car but still needs everyday wheels short term. I wonder if he's best off weighing it in, adding in the money he'd have paid for me to do work and buying another shiter, short MoT would be fine. 

[grogee]

I told BiL I didn't want to do his PAS pump, which is true. He's coming to see us Sat and I'll just tell him I think spending money on that van is a waste, it's beyond economical repair. 

In other news, this morning the side 'nostril' grille bit flew out of the Saab as I drove along, luckily nothing behind me but I didn't retrieve it. I did think it went in a bit easily when I replaced it yesterday. 

 

[Cookiesouwest]

Sad face for the grille, not the knackered van

[grogee]

Had a bit of time and dry weather today, so I got the Saab front level sensor fitted. It's part of the xenon lights system to automatically drop the lights if there's a load in the boot (or if you boot it). In the course of removing undertray that was in the way I've found an oil leak, not sure which flavour. 

Is there a favourite place for them to bleed? Levels all seem ok so I'm not losing loads. Perhaps I'll think of it as auto anti-corrosion system. 

I've been putting off tackling a bit of rot in the rear, because WIRE WHEEL and MESS/NOISE. But got some good news about a job today, so I used that momentum to get on with it. 

It's actually better than I thought, a bit of surface rust on the rails at the rear. They are thick box section so once wire wheeled I soon found solid metal. Treated with some rust juice and I'll get a coat of zinc primer on tomorrow, weather depending. 

The exhaust is pretty tired but not leaking, hopefully a pass at next MoT.

[grogee]

Rear brakes bled with the Gunson ezi-bleed thing, which is quite a good idea although not perfect. Still, it enables me to push the old fluid out and put some fresh stuff in. We won't talk about the spillage. 

Two coats of zinc primer on the chassis rails and one of black goopy chassis paint. My timing was perfect as I finished just as the heavens opened. One more coat of black should do it then I'll strap the zorst back on and put it back on the ground. 

Best of all it's curry night tonight and I'm celebrating a new job, so I'm expecting a fuzzy head tomorrow morning. 

[grogee]

What a lovely sunny January day. We were supposed to be repairing a gatepost this morning but the bodgers who built our estate just stuffed a post in the ground with no postcrete, and of course it's rotted. 

Anyway onto BiL's shitty van and I did 3 out of 4 glow plugs. The right-hand one is under the engine mount so we decided to see if it would start better with 3 new ones. Christ it's a nail though. Big puddle of oil on the drive from where he parked up. I'm hoping the engine will seize and that'll be the end of the sorry thing. 

Then last coat o' paint on the Saab underthings. Looking much better now. 

Then tackled the breather. It's accessible from underneath but only with one hand as the zorst/catalyst is in the way. With some combination of levering with a long screwdriver and pinching the release tabs I got the old one off. 

Also replaced some tired vac hoses that had turned to crumbly crap. 

Lastly I investigated the oil leak. It looks like the autobox cooler lines are leaking, which one of you warned me about (sorry I forget who). I've done a quick search for replacements, there is a used set from a 9000 that might work - does anyone know if they'd fit?

[grogee]

More fiddling today, it's dry but windy. Replaced another crusty vac pipe. I just bought a 3 metre job lot of 3mm silicone hose to cover any I come across, so it's easy to just crimp off a length and fix it. 

Took the old DICk off as the new one is coming soon, plus I got to replace the plugs. You can see under its cover where it's failed. 

Rear wheels were a bitch to get off last time, I had to resort to BFH + bit of wood on rim. So I've (brass) wire wheeled the inner bits of each wheel and smeared some copper grease on there to prevent them sticking next time. 

Tested the 2nd hand level sensor I bought, because having replaced both F and R I'm still getting the xenon warning light on dash. Sure enough, the rear one checks out on Tech 2 when I move it, but the front one is stuck on 42% no matter what position the sensor arm is in. Yes the seller will take returns but it's just a bit annoying having to do the job twice. At £50 ea I was keen to fix it as cheaply as possible but both F and R needed replacing. 

Also ordered a replacement mirror control as, in common with EVERY OTHER SAAB EVER MADE the switch has failed and I can't move either mirror rightwards. 

[grogee]

New DICk arrived today. Annoyingly, saabparts.co.uk pretended they had it in stock, then sent a message after I'd paid saying they'd get stock Thurs 27th. To which I replied curtly, "Please can I have next-day delivery then".

Of course they didn't and it arrived today. Wankers. 

Also been investigating A Funny Noise from a 207 SW. Graunchy crunchy sound when accelerating or turning. 

All the usual suspects are in good nick:

- Lower arms, bushes and ball joint

- ARB bushes and drop links

- CV joints

- Engine mounts and torque reaction mount

- Springs not broken

- No play or noise from wheel bearings

I can only think the top mounts are worn out, so I've advised as much. 

Discs need doing too. 

[grogee]

Today I fitted the replacement-replacement front level sensor to the Saab to finally cure the 'xenon light ISSUE' warning light. Sure enough, with the £50 bit bolted in, the light has gone out and stayed out. I'm supposed to 'calibrate' it with TECH-2 but CBA right now. I'll need to fire it up before too long so I'll just do it then. 

So now we have a 9-5 Aero with NO warning lights, all for the affordable* fee of £350 parts. 

Compared to paying someone else to do all this, that's a bargain. But having spent A Lot More Than That on parts, I should probably slow down a bit. 

On the other hand it's bloody lovely, and I do enjoy prolonging something from a defunct marque.

Went to see my Puma which has been hibernating in a council garage. Fitted a new battery to it and took it for a razz. The roads are dry and there's not too much sludge around. I mainly did it because I felt sorry for the new tyres on it, and didn't want them to get flat spots. But also because last night I had a dream that Mrs Grogee had torched it. 

[djoptix]

God I'm glad I sold you this, I can't wait to buy it back. 

[grogee]

3 hours ago, djoptix said:

God I'm glad I sold you this, I can't wait to buy it back. 

You won't be able to afford it after all those la-de-da Pret coffees and fancy ready-made sandwiches. 

Megabus! Bloody Lord Snooty over there. 

[grogee]

Emergency swearing at Grogee Towers this afternoon, @Cluffy on the phone in desperate need of a driveway. Mrs Cluffy's Golf was making a sad clanging noise and once wheel was off, we saw the dust shield was flapping about in the breeze. 

Getting to it involved getting the caliper carrier bolts off, and they were both tight and nearly inaccessible. This is usually the case in my experience. 

I threw the full arsenal of breakers, levers, cheater bars etc and, dear reader, I'm sad to report that one 3/8" ratchet died for the cause. But we did eventually free the caliper carrier and found the shield had rusted out all three of its mounting holes. A temporary bodge with penny washers was carried out and everything reassembled in the dark. 

Mrs Cluffy is now mobile again but we'll need to get those hubs off to get new shields on. Best to do both because the other side will be clinging on for dear life. 

[djoptix]

Sir needs a bigger Makita ugga dugga, maybe the dtw1002z iirc? 

[grogee]

1 hour ago, djoptix said:

Sir needs a bigger Makita ugga dugga, maybe the dtw1002z iirc? 

That's as big an ugga-dugga as I need. It's powerful enough for most of what I do. However it is a bit flimsy - the top bit is heavy but the handle bit is a bit wobbly. 

Anyway there was no way that was getting anywhere near the caliper carrier bolts, as VW have filled that area with something called 'suspension components'. Totally unnecessary in my view. 

[Cluffy]

15 hours ago, grogee said:

Emergency swearing at Grogee Towers this afternoon, @Cluffy on the phone in desperate need of a driveway. Mrs Cluffy's Golf was making a sad clanging noise and once wheel was off, we saw the dust shield was flapping about in the breeze. 

Getting to it involved getting the caliper carrier bolts off, and they were both tight and nearly inaccessible. This is usually the case in my experience. 

I threw the full arsenal of breakers, levers, cheater bars etc and, dear reader, I'm sad to report that one 3/8" ratchet died for the cause. But we did eventually free the caliper carrier and found the shield had rusted out all three of its mounting holes. A temporary bodge with penny washers was carried out and everything reassembled in the dark. 

Mrs Cluffy is now mobile again but we'll need to get those hubs off to get new shields on. Best to do both because the other side will be clinging on for dear life. 

Can not thank you enough, George. GTi goodness back out hounding the Warwickshire back roads. Project 200k is still on course...

[Cluffy]

6 minutes ago, grogee said:

That's as big an ugga-dugga as I need. It's powerful enough for most of what I do. However it is a bit flimsy - the top bit is heavy but the handle bit is a bit wobbly. 

Anyway there was no way that was getting anywhere near the caliper carrier bolts, as VW have filled that area with something called 'suspension components'. Totally unnecessary in my view. 

SO many things in the way. I am not looking forward to doing the other side as I've not seen a car that high before without it being on a ramp...!

[Sh'Eds]

On 1/12/2022 at 4:51 PM, grogee said:

If that makes no difference I'll move up the suspension 'tree' and start replacing bits. I've already got my eye on some PU subframe bushes that don't look a total bastard to fit. 

Are these any good to you - partial set of pu bushes for 9-5 front subframe. I can only find 3 currently but should have 4 as I only replaced the rear two in my old 9-5.

Think you are local to Coventry so could drop them to you if any use.

[grogee]

Ooh very much so. I've been thinking I should do this. What are the odds you'll find the fourth?

I'm quite happy to come and collect or send you a box, unless you want a cup of tea and a natter, in which case feel free to travel to sunny Southam. 

[Sh'Eds]

30 minutes ago, grogee said:

What are the odds you'll find the fourth?

I will have a proper look for the fourth in the morning and let you know.

[djoptix]

Also, I've got a niggling feeling I have an Aero back box (used but I think better than that one) in my unit. Yours FOC if it's required for the next mot. 

[Sh'Eds]

Got 4 now. Will PM regards collection / delivery.

[grogee]

13 hours ago, djoptix said:

Also, I've got a niggling feeling I have an Aero back box (used but I think better than that one) in my unit. Yours FOC if it's required for the next mot. 

Thanks, I've never been one to turn down rusting hulks of metal so I'd be delighted to take it off your hands. We are Devon bound start of April so if it turns up before then, let me know. 

@Wgl2019 tells me that the silencer (rear) is double skinned so although it looks rusty AF, it does in fact have a second life.

[Wgl2019]

Checking the MOT history on mine shows an advisory for exhaust corrosion back in 2012, still on the same exhaust 10 years and 65k miles later 😉.

Once the outer skin starts to go it can potentially trap crud and moisture so I decided to trim it away, if you drop it down from the rubber hangers and carefully go round with a dremmel where the sections meet in the middle you would never know anything had been there.

[grogee]

Went to Euro Crap Rats to get some rear pads (Brembo, no less). Nice journey, Master Grogee in the passenger seat enjoying pressing buttons. 

Then, the ungrateful swine does this.

I've left it in the naughty corner to stew in its own guilt, and I'll maybe get Tech 2 out later and find out what it's moaning about. 

No symptoms, drives lovely. 

[grogee]

On the other hand, on a gentle run with a bit of town shunting, I got this. Swings and roundabouts. 

[mintwth]

35 minutes ago, grogee said:

Went to Euro Crap Rats to get some rear pads (Brembo, no less). Nice journey, Master Grogee in the passenger seat enjoying pressing buttons. 

Then, the ungrateful swine does this.

I've left it in the naughty corner to stew in its own guilt, and I'll maybe get Tech 2 out later and find out what it's moaning about. 

No symptoms, drives lovely. 

Oh no. I hope my bad luck isn't catching

[AnnoyingPentium]

53 minutes ago, grogee said:

Just noticed yours has an 'R' for refuel like my Fabia does!

...which you canny see fur the needle. Oops.

[High Jetter]

39 minutes ago, AnnoyingPentium said:

Just noticed yours has an 'R' for refuel like my Fabia does!

Are your sure it's not R for reserve?

[grogee]

I was going to say R for Reserve as well, from the Olden Days when you had a tap to turn from main tank to reserve tank. 

Anyway I plugged in the Tech 2 and got the following. P1110 Charge Air Bypass Valve Performance Problems. 

Interestingly I have replaced some vacuum hoses so I think the valve is being 'exercised' where previously it wasn't being operated. Also this valve seems to be a consumable on B235 engines. 

The other two codes, I think, are from before I changed the DICk - because I didn't go in and clear the codes it threw then. 

Tried to calibrate the headlights too, but the bastard thing won't let me, possibly because Chinese Tech 2. Judging by the numbers at rest position I'm not far off anyway. 

[grogee]

10% of me, the untamed 17 year old me, wants to get an aftermarket dump valve to replace the standard one. 

PTSHHHHHHH!