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Reading the Ads...


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Posted

A description of a filthy shit encrusted utterly bummed Estate I’ve noticed recently is ‘ideal fishing car’

What other ‘what it really means’ descriptions do you have?

Posted

A 'Barry Boy' Citroen Saxo 1.0 or 1.1 advertised by a trader for £1995. Described as 'ruined by previous owner, would have been worth more' or words to that effect. It probably sold quickly to some teenage wannabe drag racer. 

Posted

Drives ok... not good, just ok, limps round the yard.

Genuine reason for sale... it’s fucked, genuinely that’s the reason it’s for sale.

Posted

"A genuine investment opportunity" - usually up at the price it might be in 20 years time, for the buyer to make a £200 profit in 50 years time.

  • Like 3
Posted
16 minutes ago, DavidB said:

"A genuine investment opportunity" - usually up at the price it might be in 20 years time, for the buyer to make a £200 profit in 50 years time.

Usually, always often, associated with blue oval badged cars.

Posted
7 minutes ago, St.Jude said:

Usually, always often, associated with blue oval badged cars.

Old Fords aren’t exactly the equivalent of buying British Gas shares when they were first floated. I don’t know if the idiots buying them realise that as the cars become more expensive so do the parts they constantly need and the welding bills. 

Another one that gets me is ‘we are proud to be able to offer you today...’ like they’re doing me a fucking favour!

  • Haha 3
Posted

“I haven’t tried to turn the engine over”

The engine has been stored in a canal

  • Haha 3
Posted

"What you see is what you get" - I'm struggling to think of a single positive thing.

Posted

“I intended to restore it but haven’t got the time”

It’s A LOT worse than I expected

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Posted

‘Work commitments have taken over’... I’d actually much rather be at work that welding this pile of shit up.

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Posted

‘It’s never bothered me’... but it’s bothered the MOT tester enough for him to condemn it.

Posted
8 minutes ago, sierraman said:

Old Fords aren’t exactly the equivalent of buying British Gas shares when they were first floated. I don’t know if the idiots buying them realise that as the cars become more expensive so do the parts they constantly need and the welding bills. 

Another one that gets me is ‘we are proud to be able to offer you today...’ like they’re doing me a fucking favour!

I think a lot of them rely on the whole "MOT Exempt" when selling these Escorts, knowing that unless you put it on the ramp you won't see the galloping rot under it. 

MOT Exempt = "It'd most likely fail"

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Posted

‘I have not attempted to start the engine’... you have and it’s seized to the point even Charles Atlas couldn’t budge it on the end of a 1200mm bar.

  • Haha 3
Posted

"Haven't had time to MOT it."

It failed its MOT quite spectacularly 2 weeks ago and I've not realised you can look them up online.

Posted

"Good condition for year" - the very fact I've had to add "for year" to that sentence should tell you everything you need to know.

Posted

People who write "it is what it is , it aint what it aint" on adverts should be shot through the lungs.

"Ideal workhorse" usually means its filthy and shagged.

  • Like 4
Posted
4 minutes ago, Soundwave said:

"Good condition for year" - the very fact I've had to add "for year" to that sentence should tell you everything you need to know.

By that matrix a 1978 Fiesta should be little more than a few perished bits of rubber, some brown dust and an engine block.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Posted

"Ideal off roader" or "Ideal Track car."

Too fucked to go back on the road.

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Posted

Rare to find. : never popular when new, most of them scrapped by now including better ones than this

Posted

Not forgetting "Barn Find" any old heap, anytime, anywhere that has not been used for a bit. (Barn not required)

  • Like 2
Posted
1 hour ago, HMC said:

“I haven’t tried to turn the engine over”

I thought that meant the engine was lying by the side of the car, upside down.

Posted
2 hours ago, DavidB said:

"A genuine investment opportunity" ...

....for the seller currently flogging it at an inflated level.

Posted

"Rare classic" = "I can't spell, so I couldn't find another one on eBay"

Posted

‘Xxxxx not working but been told it’s a £5 part not had time to do it’... of course that rough idle on that diesel is a filter...

  • Like 3
Posted

‘Not sure what to ask...’ 

You know full well what you want to ask you just haven’t got the brass neck to come right out with it

  • Like 2

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