The grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

Absolutely I could. Unfortunately she could pretend she accidentally stabbed me in the knackers with a pitchfork whilst ion the way to visit the horse she doesn't own.

[Negative Creep]

A letter at work, stating he spent a total of £21,000 with us, which "must be the same level as your customer advisors earn@

 

 

HA HA HA HA HA HA

 

[eddyramrod]

@ scary! I "accidentally" bought my 1990 LeBaron convertible with the holiday money, about 5 weeks before we were due to fly to Lanzarote... so it can be done!

[scaryoldcortina]

Absolutely I could. Unfortunately she could pretend she accidentally stabbed me in the knackers with a pitchfork whilst ion the way to visit the horse she doesn't own.

 

In that case the answer is simple - buy her a horse. She'll be too busy to notice the new recovery truck, and if she does see it pretend you are going to convert it into a horsebox. Also start wearing a cricket box around the house, just in case. And hide all the credit card bills ffs.

[scaryoldcortina]

@ scary! I "accidentally" bought my 1990 LeBaron convertible with the holiday money, about 5 weeks before we were due to fly to Lanzarote... so it can be done!

 

see! Wasn't such a stupid idea after all.

 

Eddy, you do still have all the er, "equipment" I take it?

[Albert Ross]

So wait, you can't buy something on the chip that can EARN you money? With winter coming, and all the resultant OMG CHAOS that will happen as soon as one snowflake falls.... You could have it paid off within a year. Keep it fuelled up, and also buy an old Fordson Major for towing them out of ditches!

[Negative Creep]

Already know plenty of people going on about buying a 4x4 for the winter, and PH is full of people stating you must buy winter tyres otherwise you'll explode in a ball of fire as soon as it gets a bit nippy outside

[Guest]

As we all know (since it is my favourite whinge) the winter panic frustrates me. All these people making a frantic effort to get to work and putting their lives at risk for likely no gain. If the weather's bad, don't go in. The country pretty much "grinds to a halt" work-wise for Christmas/New Year/Easter and no one seems to whinge about that. If I can't get in to work, a handful of people might have to wait a few days to pay a bill or something. My job isn't immediately crucial and neither are the vast majority of others, stay off the road and let the emergency services help people who might have a half-decent reason to be out there in the first place. Though if it wasn't for whinging managers I suspect a lot more people wouldn't feel so "obligated" to get into work. If you crash your car on the way there, work isn't going to pay for it - screw them. Lie if you have to, it's better for everyone.

[Negative Creep]

It must be chaos in countries like Norway, Finland, Canada, Russia. Every winter the entire country must collapse.

[Guest]

The answer to that one is quite simple - if you live in a country where it's definitely going to snow for a long period of the year, you're not going to feel daft spending a huge amount on snowploughs and suchlike.

 

If you live in a country where - at worst - the harshest days of a few weeks might be a bit iffy, you're better off saving your cash (highlands exempted as they are already in the above situation). We could spend a fortune on snow ploughs, make winter tyres mandatory and make a right big song and dance about it, then have a few years in a row where most of the country just gets a light dusting for a few days so the whole thing was a bit of a waste of money.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Norm, I bet you $1 that you cannot make 5 consecutive posts without including some of your standard-issue blather about all governments being too big/inefficient/responsible for all cancer deaths/a thinly-veiled attempt at forcing communism on the masses. You just cannot do it!

[outlaw118]

RE: OMGSNOWCHAOS

 

Bit of a coincidence here, just had my targets for the financial year (yes 5 months late), and apparently we're now not allowed to claim "extreme weather" for a reason not to go out driving and harrassing the non-paying public, a little perk that, to be honest, I used for the total of 2 days last winter, albeit spread over the course of a week. (Our time accounting works in minutes, standard day being 444 minutes, I claimed 900 minutes that week.)

I now have to either make the time up, or take leave, which whilst I realise that puts me on a par with most of you, it's still a bit shit to lose something that you've had for 11 years. I will therefore be out in blizzards, ice, fog etc etc, and just have to deal with it if I slip and break my cock or something, or stick the van in a ditch.

The whole idea is to reduce "unproductive" time, which includes vehicle repair, breakdown and maintainence. So far, in the 5 months April to now, I've had more than double all but one member of the team, and the equivalent of half a day more than i did in the whole of last year. How is that my fault? Main cause was the drive belt going (twice) and the gear selector rod breaking, both caused because They Who Know Best have decided that the van can be kept for 2 years longer than before, and now things are breaking down. Grumbly will be 6 years old March 2012, and had a really hard life, lots of stop/starts, short journeys, etc etc. And it's a Citroen.

As the reduction of time is part of my target, if the van breaks down again between now and March, I will fail to meet the target, and not get the full amount of payrise. Thanks.

[Guest]

Why not just crash the van into a great big ditch at the first sign of snow? Point made and problem solved.

[retrogeezer]

weather forecast wrong yet again, supposed to be nice today and I need to get under the car but it is absolutely pissing down.

[jonny69]

If you do buy a tow truck, make sure it's chod looking and as difficult looking to drive as possible. That way when you rock up to pull some twunt in a BMW out a verge because he can't control a car at 5mph on snow and tries to blameZ the hugez0r tyres are no goods in snowz innit, nothing to do with him being a spacktard at all and only being able to use full throttle or nothing, you can show him what an absolute cock he must be. And he'll hopefully realise. Someone came in and asked for a jump start once and commented on how shagged 'that old car' looked and something about them being unsafe and should be banned. So I jumped straight in it, which did look like it had been pulled out the canal but was way legal, fired first turn and rescued Mr. Shiny who would normally have been hassling me on the road. Thinly veiled condescending smile wiped all over my face.

 

Ok, I embellished the story a bit, but you get the point. Gays.

 

I should get another Pop. I did like that thing.

[whitevanman]

That list is a failure by default because it doesn't include anything by Jimmy Buffett.

 

My Gods....somebody else that likes Jimmy Buffet

[trigger]

I've just thrown a right "BF" in a new restaurant this lunch time

 

Here in Ipswich we had a club called Pals which recently closed down to be re-opened as a Revolution bar and restaurant, My wife's work is around the corner so as a opening offer they have offered every employee a free main course meal during the day, So this lunch time me and Mrs Trig met up to have lunch there, It started off well, getting jumped on by 2 waitresses (and 1 waiter who couldn't decided which way to swing) to our seats.

 

Now my wife only has a hour for lunch so we are quite keen to get a move on, after waiting 10 mins we get asked what drinks we want (2 cokes) and then another 10 mins passes with our drinks sat on the bar before i have to ask to have them sent over and we then ordered our food.

 

Over 40 mins later our food arrives, My wife's pizza was fine but my cheesy chips and steak strips was freezing cold were it had been sat on the edge of the kitchen for ages, I started to have a moan at the waiter saying this wasn't good enough and asked him to re heat it, another 15 mins passes and my foods still not back so i told the manager to poke it and walked out.

 

The funny thing is everyone else started to moan at this point as well, The restaurant was full of Willis employees (who my wife works for) and some of them had been there longer then us and was still waiting, (they all only get a hour lunch break as well). I told the manger that it wasn't a good way to start a business who then started to blame the chef's, I said you've been open 2 weeks now, they should off got the hang of it by now, "Yes sir" and walks off

 

I even counted 8 staff waiting by the kitchen hatch at one point chatting whilst customers were waiting to order.

 

Rant over.

[tonedepear]

Open your own restaurant called "Le Smaller Sockét". That'll teach 'em.

[Lankytim]

NEEDED 2x 175/80/14's for my Volvo.

 

BOUGHT 2x 185/70/14's from ebay.

 

I'm such a dork! Anybody want to buy a pair of pirellis with 6mm tread for £20?

[outlaw118]

I apologise if I appear stoopid, Mr LT, but whats the problem? They're close enough?!

[Lankytim]

They're close, but not close enough. I want a set thats all the same size!

[outlaw118]

Now me understandz....U R Perfektshunizt

[Lankytim]

Plus i'd need two spares to stay 100% legal in the case of a puncture.

[wuvvum]

Plus i'd need two spares to stay 100% legal in the case of a puncture.

Surely following that logic, spacesavers would be illegal?

[Lankytim]

Plus i'd need two spares to stay 100% legal in the case of a puncture.

Surely following that logic, spacesavers would be illegal?

 

Err, I guess so! They obviously are legal though, maybe because they are classed as a temporary "get you home" measure with a limited top speed? If you got pulled by VOSA you may have a hard time explaining different tyre sizes on the same axle otherwise.

[fiatdaft]

Or maybe not if you have a flat matching size tyre in the boot?

[CIH]

Nah, that ain't right. Lots of motors run different sizes front and back but only carry the one spare.

[RoadworkUK]

...Here in Ipswich we had a club called Pals

 

Oh, it's gone, is it? Good. Fucking hated that place. When I was at BMW it would invariably be the start venue of our "nights out". We invariably ended up in New York Exchange, which was very nearly as bad.

 

I miss Zest.

[Guest]

BOUGHT 2x 185/70/14's from ebay.

 

I'm such a dork! Anybody want to buy a pair of pirellis with 6mm tread for £20?

Isn't that the size Bollox needed for the back of his Argenta?

[trigger]

Oh, it's gone, is it? Good. Fucking hated that place. When I was at BMW it would invariably be the start venue of our "nights out". We invariably ended up in New York Exchange, which was very nearly as bad.

 

I miss Zest.

 

It always smelled of piss in Pals, Ipswich nightlife is a bit shit now though, You have Isaacs on the waterfront where everyone goes too now but there's sod all after that if you want a dance (I don't do dance), You have Groove nightclub which is just a Chicago's playing 80's music, full of fat, rough slappers and overpriced, watered down beer served in warm, plastic glasses. Zest has just re-opened as a live music and comedy club called The Malthouse Conference and Events Centre and Switch Nightclub which no doubt be shit as well.