The grumpy thread

[Pillock]

At least they've reversed their decision not to open any of the widened lanes until the lot was finished, I think 27-25 is open now isn't it?Originally they were going to cone it off until winter 2010 so it could all be opened in one go.If you're travelling in rushhour, it actually moves steadier at 50mph, just seems slow. It's not really increased travel time when I've had to use it.

[Guest]

If I go to work on the motorway route (on at M1 J40 Northbound, switch to M62 Eastbound, off at M62 J32), I encounter roadworks on the M62 which seem to have been there for yonks now, that's also a 50mph limit with those variable speed cameras.In a weird way I look forward to it though, it's the only point of the motorway where people don't tend to drive like morons, everyone is sat there doing the same speed and there isn't much overtaking happening. I just roll the window down and relax with the radio crackling away.Seems to feel slower when you have to do it on that bit of the M1 though - dunno why.

[Cavcraft]

Until I 'accidentally' ripped the cable thing off the limiter one day and carried on doing 80mph.

Seems the Spaniards have that trick too - followed a train of 5 'E' plated juggernauts on the M11 last night. I was cruise controlled 83 so the fluorolvos wouldn't bother with me; and followed them all the way to the A11Edit: Out of curiosity, what could one of these get to if derestricted?Edit: also, I would be interested to know about the gearboxes in these modern trucks. I often hear about huge amounts of gears, but assume they are just autos. Oops, topic scope creep again so it pisses me off greatly that I don't know this.

Let's put it this way: one day I'm leaving Bangor in the 7.5 tonner and just coming down the ramp to join the A55 heading East. Heading the same way already on the carriage are two Irish reg'd arrticulated fridge lorries. I am soon on the carriage way and reach top speed on the tacho (80mph from memory) and I haven't caught them up.I've even been overtaken going up Rhuallt Hill on the 55 by 44 tonne trucks I shit you not.I expect there's a lot of folk lore regarding these things but people used to tell me that some owners put coach diffs in trucks, fiddled with or broke speed limiters and had drivers with 2 or 3 licences. I can confirm though that going down the A41 between Whitchurch and Chester any week day between about 3.00pm and 3.45pm would see one Irish driver a couple of miles ahead and then fucking loads behind him bumper to bumper flat out. Apparantly they take it in turns going in front to keep an eye out for VOSA and the coppers then phone or CB their mates if they spot any. It's also pretty comical watching them go over speed bumps with so much weight on they just thud rather than bounce.

[Twiggy]

Am I the only one to be more than mildly irritated by the ill-mannered, inconsiderate, and mindless old giffers who insist on riding their motorised wheel chairs down the middle of the village street, totally oblivious of the traffic chaos they create behind them ? Three times it happened last week........... each time there was an LGV behind them which was unable to pass.......causing traffic to pile up behind, while they trundled down the street, pausing to say good morning/afternoon/get stuffed/how`s your father to all and sundry.The darn things should have to be taxed, insured, MOT`d, and they should have to pass a riding test before they`re allowed on the road! So there! Melts me ear wax it does !

[dollywobbler]

I know I get very fed up with them hurtling along pavements, crashing into people and then driving off in ignorant bliss.

[pogweasel]

I would like to see all mobility things thrown into the sea. Why is it 99% of them seem to be piloted by obese women in late middle age, dripping in cheap gold and puffing away on a Richmond Superking. WALK TO THE SHOPS, YOU FAT LAZY FUCKS. And you are right about them being a menace, either on the pavment (squashing children and feet) or on the road (dithering, causing queues, or worse still driving on completely the wrong side of the road, as I genuinely encountered this morning, old twat nearly got splattered by my rampaging maxi...)

[Guest]

They have those mobility scooters in Asda and they seem near-entirely for use by bone-idle fat men. Bit of a Walmart import I suspect.Rant subject of today - buying shoes. Currently sporting a nice brown pair of loafers from "Beckett", whoever they might be. They cost £20 from the shoe shop next to the car museum. After about 2 years of use, each shoe has a hole in the side. Personally, I don't have a problem with that, but society seems to expect people to have shoes without holes in them and I work in an office so I probably won't be able to get away with it for much longer.So now I'm going to have to say goodbye to a very comfortable pair of shoes and buy some more. I absolutely hate buying shoes. Even though I'm in the shoe shop for about 10 minutes maximum, I just don't like the atmosphere, so everything is a bit hurried. I get to my size and briefly scan the aisle for something that will fit the bill - there is something, great! Try them on, they're slightly too big/small, I need the size down/up. But they don't do those in that. They do some that are a bit like that, but they're £70 or something, so I have to try again, repeat a few times.Eventually I will find some that are in my size (9), style (loafers), colour (brown) and price range (scum), so I'll get them bought up. But then there's the suffering of having to break them in, weeks of having to mess about with painful feet, by which time you'll have discovered whether they're a "bad" pair or not - in which case they'll already be falling to bits. Nightmare.Why women repeatedly put up with the chore of buying shoes I don't know, I can only conclude that they have brain rot or something. Soz ladies!

[pogweasel]

Hirst man, what are you doing going to the shoe shops? Just get yourself the appropriate footwear off the internets and stop all the farting about. That said, I guess that your officeness dictates a certain amount of style is required. I categorise shoes thus:Trainers, at all times where possible. Safety boots (smart), lace-up, 'nubuck' type.Safety boots (rough), lace-up, black, cheapest ones availableSafety boots (riggers) for times when you absolutely have to look like a pikeySmart shoes, 1 pair, covered in dust in the cupboard under the stairs. Only worn at weddings, funerals & court appearances. It's all the shoes you need in life.

[ChinaTom]

You'll find several of these arrogant elders bumbling along on country roads around my village - many of them are "fast" B roads with plenty of Banham poultry trucks thundering along them. It's most terrifying during those summer evenings when the sun hasn't quite set, but not dark enough for headlights to assist with vision - these hours which almost always coincides with their journey home from the pub. Which they undertake with no rear lights, no reflectors to speak of, no regard for the fact that there are other drivers either behind them or coming straight for them when they swerve to avoid the drain covers / piles of leaves / pothole. And they are sailing ten sheets to the wind on Greene King IPA from half pint mugs, singing, shouting, each phrase ending in "y'bugger". Apparently according to my neighbour, the police and rescue helicopters that wake us all up during the night are probably not looking for criminals or car wrecks - they are looking for an old pickled giffer who has lost his way from the King's Head to the retirement home 5 doors along; and is usually found in a ditch in Cuffer Lane - wheels still spinning swearing at whoever he thinks has moved the front door ramp this time. Then again, I would like to think I will be piloting some sort of vehicle when I am 103.Why are they allowed to use the public highways with no tax or testing (proficiency or roadworthiness)? What class of vehicle are these usually red plastic machines of madness? Biggest unfathomable is how come more Banham Poultry lorries don't have giffer shaped dents in their grilles.

[pogweasel]

I don't know. Some of these giffer scooters seem to be road-registered. (In which case they can definately piss off from driving on the pavement)Oh and for the record, it is impossible to get pissed on GK IPA.

[Mike D]

Hirst man, just get down to the cobblers and get them re-soled. Much more your style! You could get a spare key cut for the Stanza while you wait....

[Richard]

It's the uppers that have holes in I think.

[ChinaTom]

I don't know. Some of these giffer scooters seem to be road-registered. (In which case they can definately piss off from driving on the pavement)Oh and for the record, it is impossible to get pissed on GK IPA.

you need to factor in the fishing tackle box of medication that allegedly makes the "departure lounge" more bearable. By all means replace "hangover" with "soul destroying eggy fart". Therefore, maybe the local constabulary can apply the same sobriety checks to giffers as they do to stoned 17 year olds in Corsas.

[Guest]

Hirst man, just get down to the cobblers and get them re-soled. Much more your style!

I did one better than that - about a year ago they had holes in the bottom, so I resoled them with a sole repair kit from Morrisons, a proper giffer-style repair which remains to this day! Like Richard says though, the holes are now on the uppers so they are now doomed.As for you Pog, I just tend to wear the same shoes regardless of what I'm doing. This means I sometimes end up with a load of filler dust on them and have to give them a quick blast with the hosepipe before I set off for work. Pimpin' aint easy!

[RedSparrow]

1

The man who pulled out of a junction into my path in his shitty merc whilst looking straight at me - you are a cunt.

I am annoyed with myself a bit as I didn't beep him, but this was because he had his 12 year old girlfriend in the passenger seat so he probably would have stopped to give me a load of abuse to impress it.

 

2

I have to work loads to keep 3 cars on the road. Because I am working loads I have no time to drive for enjoyment. Poor TR7 has hardly seen the light of day this summer.

 

3

This is my 4th day of not smoking. Work collegues and general public seem to be conspiring to irritate me into marching to the shop for 12.5g of Amber Leaf.

[dollywobbler]

1 - buy an old shitter and simply don't stop. 2 - That is arse. Poor TR7.3 - It does get easier! Ten years but a long time now since I went from being a former smoker to a non-smoker!

[RedSparrow]

Cheers for the smoking related encouragement Dolly.I was in my 2001 Fiesta at the time. Should have ploughed into the prick.

[Guest]

Hey I forgot about this little gem - for some reason my workplace is participating in some kind of one-week celebration of customer service. They've done this before. So what is this all about?

RECOGNITION, REWARD, INFORMING, TEAM WORK, MORALE BOOSTING and FUN!

Great! I love fun- hold on, fun within the workplace? That isn't fun! Get me out of here.Yes, it's basically a big exercise in making us feel happy and valued in our jobs via such methods as a "pay us £1 to dress down" day, which neatly falls on the same date as my "turn up as usual and don't pay anything" day. Also loads of zany quiz/raffle/seminar type things. Plus badges! And balloons! Brill! I love all that stuff when I'm trying to keep on top of my job.Having said that, looking at what some other workplaces are doing, I'm glad mine is only going this far. Some workplaces are doing fancy dress! What a nightmare that would be, trying to grind your way through a normal work day whilst terminally dull people try to convince everyone what a great laugh they are by turning up as Fred Flintstone. That'll be next year I bet.I may be a particularly cynical person, but all this kind of thing can get stuffed. I don't go to work for fun - I'm there to work for money so I can get by. I don't need or want my employer to inject "forced fun" into the day to convince me of my worth - I already know that I'm just filling a job role. If I went under a bus, they'd replace me. That's just how it is - I'm not some much-loved pillar of the service and employee role model, I'm just the sod who browbeats people into paying bills. Want me to feel important? Give me a raise.Also what any of this has to do with customer service is beyond me, but I've never been able to figure that one out I'm afraid. SOZ FOR THE RANT!

[Steve_RS]

So long as you'dve swerved a bit and hit his A-post or forward of it, then it's his fault... A-post or behind, then you should have saw him. And it's your fault.Either way - hes a cunt.As for the giffers in them red motorised things - one was at the side of the road the other day (on the pavement) waiting to cross. The road was clear, apart from me, motoring down at about 35mph. He waited till the last minute, then decided to cross the road in front of me. I hit the anchors (which on the works N-reg sprinter-shite weren't very effective) screeched it to a halt a few yards from him. He stared at me as if I was in the wrong and carried on crossing the road. Felt like getting out and quizzing him as to whether he had a death-wish or something. But decided not to as he would probably have a heart attack and snuff-it on me. (Something which I really didnt need) They really shouldn't let those buggers out unsupervised. Playing chicken with a ton of german van isn't clever. Rant over.

[michiel]

Everyone does that nowadays, just cross the road in front of my bike/car - I hope to hit someone soon. Preferably with the bike.

[Cavcraft]

The fat lazy bastard who left his bin bags by my back gate this morning, probably due to his wheelie bins being full of empty crisp packets, ale cans and burger boxes.Well unlucky for you you gargantuan gut bucket twat, I've put tags on your bin bags with your name and address on and PHONED THE FUCKING COUNCIL to report you. I now pray some weedy geek council Nazi called Nigel in a Marks & Sparks coat and bry-nylon shirt called takes you to court and you get sent down and dry bummed by someone called Spider.

[Albert Ross]

I get pillocks (no offence intended) pulling out in front of me, in this<<<<<<"It's old, it must not be doing the speed limit"WRONG! The sight of it in the rear view mirror normally incites a press on the right hand pedal. Normally....there are a few exceptions...but they leave a smell....

[M'coli]

Oh and for the record, it is impossible to get pissed on GK IPA.

That may partly be because the stuff's vile as well as piss-weak. When I moved to St Neots 11 years ago, it seemed that that was all the pubs had on cask, and it put me off IPA for 6 years...GK IPA? Insipid Piss Awful.

[pogweasel]

It's not really 'vile', just boring, and weak. Could you not have gone to a charlie wells pub?Mind you, Eagle's pretty cack as well.

[RedSparrow]

I get pillocks (no offence intended) pulling out in front of me, in this<<<<<<"It's old, it must not be doing the speed limit"WRONG! The sight of it in the rear view mirror normally incites a press on the right hand pedal. Normally....there are a few exceptions...but they leave a smell....

Always when Im in the metro. Similar - 'its old and small therefore can't be doing more than 20mph, not like my classy Audi TT'I always try and overtake them if possible when this happens.

[brammy777]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHSo i opened an unpaid item dispute with the buyer of that stereo, and he has 6 days left to payBut now the seller of an item i have so far been unable to pay for has opened one against me, despite the fact i messaged him and told him i might not be able to pay for the item and he can relist it if he wants to, and i would pay his fees.But he didnt reply to that, he decided opening an unpaid item dispute would work better.cheers, twat.

[ChinaTom]

Back to Hirst's rant for a moment. I sat through 2 days of "Prince2 Management Training" on Monday and Tuesday. And for this you need to picture the Fatfighters character played by Matt Lucas for full effect"OK guys, as you can see on the slide, the purpose of planning a project is to PLAN the project - produce the project plan. Yeah? Cool?"and, amongst others:"A Product Based Planning Management Sytem basically is a management system where the project is planned around the products. And what are the products guys? They can be just about anything"Not sure whether this cheers me up, or angers me. On the fence. O, hang on, no it's a rant. The course was just shy of a grand. So it pisses me off to the point of curling one out onto the course feedback form and smearing it over her windscreen.

[Captain Slow]

Oh and for the record, it is impossible to get pissed on GK IPA.

I managed it.But then again, I get pissed quickly.Only had that as we had it in the house and I can't find Sam Smith's in bottles anywhere locally - we were entertaining so couldn't nip down the pub for a pint.

[M'coli]

Pog, I'd moved from Andover, where I'd been spoilt by pubs serving things like Marston's Pedigree, Ringwood 49er, Wadworth 6X and worked in one selling Tanglefoot - nowt GK or Charles Wells had was going to compare to that lot!

[bazzateer]

My employers paid for around 1500-1800 employees to take half a day off work, rented a large auditorium in central London for 5 mornings so that they could give us various presentations on the future, including how we've all got to tighten our belts to save the Taxpayers' money. Well how frigging much has that cost in hiring the premises and lost working days? You could have put it all in an email!!!