The grumpy thread

[Richard]

To the CNUTS on the way home from the coldplay concert stop pulling the comunication cord, stoping the train and abuseing the poor driver who keeps having to reset the brakes. Your TOSSERS. I have just de-trained a whole train, stuck you another one because we thought it was buggered. And your doing it again. I hope the cab drivers tell you to FLUCK OFF at Reading station and you get MUGGED and RAPED by AMOUROUS TRAMPS.I hope Gwenth Paltrow had a headache when you got in Chris Martin.

I hope you got BTP onto them.

[ashmicro]

Four fucking hours to set up a new mobile phone for the wife and a new sLaptop for my mother. FOUR hours.why does nothing work out of the box? I mean I turn slaptop on, it starts to load up windows a fresh fucking install of Vesta - I mean come on, why the the fuck cant they do this in the factory? Its like they get so far and turn it off and fuck off for a brew. Then there is all the other wanky dross trial versions that are installed, like McAffee 14 day trial - why the fuck do i only want 14 days of something then struggle to remove the twatting thing from the PC. Then there is Office 2007 (oh and fucking Vesta wont work with Office 2003) - a 60 day trial - thats fine I have a corporate edition of orifice 2007 gleaned from the NHS for the bargain price of 11 quid - so I shove that serial number in to the PC, but no the wanky version is bloody student and home version, so the serial number wont work - so uninstall that, install my version of Orifice and restart again for the nth time. i mean fooking hell Vesta doesnt even come with a browser, so off I go install Firefox, go online, instal chrome, flock and opera and then restart again....Then the phone, the bastard phone - well I mean first there was the cunt at Carporn Whorehouse who was only "answering quick questions!" not actually serving anyone - so that was one bloke on the till dealing with a big queue and one bloke doing fuck all then. Then once I got the wifes new Nokia home I had to set the twatting thing up - and its one of those touch screen jobbies - fucking mare.I havent even made the recovery discs yet ( i mean FFS, fucking put the discs in the box) That'll be another hour of my life wasted.Tomorrow Im taking the kids to the beach, fuck technology for the day. Fuck it to hell and back

It is a ballache, but it's a legal thing. It's so that YOU accept the End User Licence Agreement. I recently had 50 brand new ones to set up, and you can't do it on the battery (Windows setup say NO!). Try finding 50 free mains sockets in a fucking Roancabin. And I'm with you on all that trialware bollocks - it takes nearly as long to get rid of all that shite as setup itself.Edit toe add : Vista will work with Office 2003, but you need Office 2003 Service Pack 3 - http://www.microsoft.com/downloads/deta ... laylang=en

[Richard]

I use a combination of Office '97 and 2000 with Vista and it seems to work perfectly well. One of the few things that does.

[Pillock]

why does nothing work out of the box? I mean I turn slaptop on, it starts to load up windows a fresh fucking install of Vesta - I mean come on, why the the fuck cant they do this in the factory? Its like they get so far and turn it off and fuck off for a brew.

Not allowed to. You have to do the 'I accept everything I've just read in this 57 page document' bit, otherwise they could sign your life away for you And all the performance checking, installing options etc happens after that, but that's Microsofts decision.

i mean fooking hell Vesta doesnt even come with a browser, so off I go install Firefox, go online, instal chrome, flock and opera and then restart again....

?? It has IE7 built in, and will upgrade itself to IE8 through an update after you connect it to the net. It's the European Windows 7 that's going to come without a browser.

I havent even made the recovery discs yet ( i mean FFS, fucking put the discs in the box) That'll be another hour of my life wasted.

Personal preference. A lot of people prefer to lose 10GB of disk space and have the recovery system on the hard drive. The making-a-disk option is if you're likely to run out of disk space.

[Richard]

Surely the recovery partition is to save the manufacturers 20p? It also allows them to sell machines with 10% of the hard drive incapacitated so people end up upgrading sooner.

[chester drawers]

The making-a-disk option is if you're likely to run out of disk space.

It also gets the user out of the shit (at least in so far as the OS is concerned) if the HDD fails and needs replacing. Which, given the built down to a price rather than up to a standard approach of most manufacturers these days, is not an uncommon occurrence in and out of warranty.

[brammy777]

The making-a-disk option is if you're likely to run out of disk space.

It also gets the user out of the shit (at least in so far as the OS is concerned) if the HDD fails and needs replacing. Which, given the built down to a price rather than up to a standard approach of most manufacturers these days, is not an uncommon occurrence in and out of warranty.

Amen to that, when my Desktop formatted I lost 150gb of data, annoying much.Also, its been a week since i sold that stereo, he hasnt spoken since wednesday, should i open an unpaid item dispute?

[Mr Lobster]

Also, its been a week since i sold that stereo, he hasnt spoken since wednesday, should i open an unpaid item dispute?

Yes, at least that way you'll get your ebay fees back.

[Negative Creep]

Minicabbers who block one lane of a dual carriageway so they can sit and talk to their mate. Wankers.

[Albert Ross]

Neighbours who get in at midnight, singing football songs at the top of their lungs, with no apparent consideration for their neighbours, he might get a bag of warm piss delivered through his door later, without the bag.......

[Guest]

The Derby.The Derby has pissed me off no end today.Because of THE DERBY, of which I have no interest in WHATSOEVER, I really couldn't give a flying fuck, it took me TWO FUCKING HOURS to get home from Rochdale. This trip normally takes 30-35 minutes.But no, because of this cuntfest every mealy mouthed knuckle dragging inbred moron and his fucking dog \ kitchen sink \ giro was out on the M60 and 56, weaving around like prize flids on ice.Because of THE DERBY, the pub that I go to in Timperley was shut. Why was my pub shut?. Fighting. Fighting OVER A FUCKING GAME OF FUCKING FOOTBALL. FOR FUCK'S SAKE YOU NEANDERTHAL WANKERS. FUCK OFF BACK TO THE PRIMORDIAL SOUP.Because of THE DERBY, I then had to go to another pub. In Sale. Which was shut. To stop pissed up arseholes coming and fighting. At 9.30.Then, thanks to THE DERBY, we had to go to the King's Ransom. I reserve hatred similarly abject only for my ex housemate in Lancaster (the aformention shit who threw my Elcaset in the tip) and my job.And guess what the Ransom was full of? Pissed up wankers braying about THE FUCKING DERBY.I don't care two dancing turgid shits whether football is our national pastime, it brings out the worst in everyone, and I really don't see why it should ruin my night. We should be fucking ashamed.There was also the slight issue of the George Best vs Richard Burns obituary coverage. This so pissed me off, and caused such a massive row between Papa Wat and myself that we didn't speak for two days. Bear in mind that Wat Sr is a blue as well. So, to summarise, I hate football, I hate what it represents, I hate the amount of money that funds the bent selfish cowboy bastards and their subsidiaries, and I cannot understand why we're so obsessed with it.

[Mr Lobster]

I don't care two dancing turgid shits whether football is our national pastime, it brings out the worst in everyone, and I really don't see why it should ruin my night. We should be fucking ashamed.So, to summarise, I hate football, I hate what it represents, I hate the amount of money that funds the bent selfish cowboy bastards and their subsidiaries, and I cannot understand why we're so obsessed with it.

+1Fuck me, I couldn't agree any more if I'd written it myself. I am utterly sick of all these overpaid brain donors and the national obsession of 'the masses' with heroworshiping these people who wouldn't so much as piss on you if you were on fire.

[Guest]

I don't care two dancing turgid shits whether football is our national pastime, it brings out the worst in everyone, and I really don't see why it should ruin my night. We should be fucking ashamed.So, to summarise, I hate football, I hate what it represents, I hate the amount of money that funds the bent selfish cowboy bastards and their subsidiaries, and I cannot understand why we're so obsessed with it.

+1Fuck me, I couldn't agree any more if I'd written it myself. I am utterly sick of all these overpaid brain donors and the national obsession of 'the masses' with heroworshiping these people who wouldn't so much as piss on you if you were on fire.

I knew someone here would agree with me.This is why I love Autoshite.That and the cars.

[RedSparrow]

Last night I left £5 worth of baccy in the taxi. I saw it on the seat when I closed the door, but didn't do anything as I was a bit drunk and my brain wasn't working on full speed. Kicking myself.So, I have decided to give up smoking, which will no doubt make me extremely grumpy and pedantic.Actually, if I could get to a point where I only smoke if Im having a drink then I would be happy. Although that is most evenings.Any advice?

[Guest]

Last night I left £5 worth of baccy in the taxi. I saw it on the seat when I closed the door, but didn't do anything as I was a bit drunk and my brain wasn't working on full speed. Kicking myself.So, I have decided to give up smoking, which will no doubt make me extremely grumpy and pedantic.Actually, if I could get to a point where I only smoke if Im having a drink then I would be happy. Although that is most evenings.Any advice?

Start playing football. You can twat someone in the face because they support a team you don't like, and it's okay because you can be passionate about football and it's fine and not gay or boring or anything.Seriously, erm, I would take up a sport or something to keep yourself busy.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

So, to summarise, I hate football, I hate what it represents, I hate the amount of money that funds the bent selfish cowboy bastards and their subsidiaries, and I cannot understand why we're so obsessed with it.

+1

 

I can't stand football, almost certainly because I was the fat kid at school forced to spend every match in goal. I don't understand the mentality of people who follow the games as as if they were a matter of life and death. Someone I know has the crest of their football club engraved in the glass of their front door. As did someone on Come Dine With Me. I mean, engraved in the glass. The front door. Of their house.

 

Maybe if it was the game it used to be, when the England squad drove Ford Cortinas and there weren't any sponsor logos on the shirts. Maybe a few ads for Watkin's Brass Hinges dotted around the pitch. Football seemed to be a lot more civilised before it became big business. (Rose tinted glasses there, with a football crest engraved in each lens).

 

Does anyone know where I can get a uPVC door with the British Leyland roundel engraved in it?

[Guest]

So, to summarise, I hate football, I hate what it represents, I hate the amount of money that funds the bent selfish cowboy bastards and their subsidiaries, and I cannot understand why we're so obsessed with it.

+1

 

I can't stand football, almost certainly because I was the fat kid at school forced to spend every match in goal. I don't understand the mentality of people who follow the games as as if they were a matter of life and death. Someone I know has the crest of their football club engraved in the glass of their front door. As did someone on Come Dine With Me. I mean, engraved in the glass. The front door. Of their house.

 

Maybe if it was the game it used to be, when the England squad drove Ford Cortinas and there weren't any sponsor logos on the shirts. Maybe a few ads for Watkin's Brass Hinges dotted around the pitch. Football seemed to be a lot more civilised before it became big business. (Rose tinted glasses there, with a football crest engraved in each lens).

 

Does anyone know where I can get a uPVC door with the British Leyland roundel engraved in it?

China?

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

They'd only have Roewe ones.

[chester drawers]

Minicabbers who block one lane of a dual carriageway so they can sit and talk to their mate. Wankers.

Quite routine around these parts too. Fancy blocking a single carriageway A road with 3 cars in the rush hour? No problem, just sit there and chat. Road fund license & insurance? Don’t worry ANPR is only interested in the registered keeper, not the driver. Some sections of society are completely untouchable. They know it & plod knows it too so a blind eye gets turned every day of the week.

[RedSparrow]

Last night I left £5 worth of baccy in the taxi. I saw it on the seat when I closed the door, but didn't do anything as I was a bit drunk and my brain wasn't working on full speed. Kicking myself.So, I have decided to give up smoking, which will no doubt make me extremely grumpy and pedantic.Actually, if I could get to a point where I only smoke if Im having a drink then I would be happy. Although that is most evenings.Any advice?

Start playing football. You can twat someone in the face because they support a team you don't like, and it's okay because you can be passionate about football and it's fine and not gay or boring or anything.Seriously, erm, I would take up a sport or something to keep yourself busy.

Hmm, I am generally shit at sports. It will have to be darts, its the only one that interests me!

[Albert Ross]

The same knuckle dragging neighbour that was screaming about "United" at midnight, gets picked up for work a 4 am every Monday...this morning was no exception, but for the fact he had overslept, so the other knuckle dragger that picks him up decided to keep his van engine running outside my bedroom window, whilst moron number one grunted out of the window next to mine. "Back in 10 minutes" was the grunted reply. True to his word, he was back in ten. Was moron number 1 ready? No. he had gone back to sleep with his tart. So, much knocking on the front door ensued, with the van still running in the street. When he finally did prise himself out of his cum stained wankpit, there were noises made about needing to go for a shit first. I could have helped him there, by kicking it out of him...............He's getting a stern letter about this "fucking Monday stupid o'clock circus" that we have to endure. Not sure he would read it without help though.........Would it be too much to ask for him to get a bastard alarm clock, and then bag in hand, wait for the phone call from the driver who he is blatantly related to, and wait quietly at the end of our quiet little "cul-de-sac" (huhuhu I said sac) for his lift to work (thankfully he works away all week, getting dropped off on a Friday afternoon) This is the same twunt that lost his key (lives alone) and was knocking on his own door to get in.................knobhead. I'll wake him up next Sunday with a grinder I think!

[retrogeezer]

Think yourself lucky.....my neighbours work in a One-Stop shop so every morning at 5.30am we get woken up by their car or motorbike starting up as they set off to work. Going to be worse in the winter when they leave the car running to de-ice it.To top it off, I wake up at 5.30 this morning because of this, drop back off to sleep then get woken up again at 6am as some inconsiderate wanker has let the their dog out to bark out a wake up call to everyone else in the street.And as for football, I don't get it either. Buggered if I'd spend stupid amounts of money on a ticket to watch it pay for 10 houses and 30 cars for whatever footballer it may be.I don't remember Massa and Hamilton fans fighting in the pubs last year over the F1 results either....

[ashmicro]

F1 is too difficult for the knuckledraggers to understand. I'm a big football fan myself, but I must say I've never had the desire to smack an opposition supporter in the face. I did, however, getted stabbed in the leg with a stanley knife at Windsor Park.

[retrogeezer]

It's the whole 'my team' and 'we kicked their asses today' blah blah blah...It's not 'your' team, you just pay for their fantastic lifestyle.And why are 90% of the people you see walking around in Football team shirts as fat as fook?? You want to try playing the game a bit more than watching it!

[seth]

I used to be in to football when I was, you know, a kid. I grew out of it.I too cannot believe the trouble it causes and the way many peoples lives are affected so greatly by 11 blokes they have no influence over whatsoever.

[M'coli]

I'm glad to hear that there is healthy disdain for football on here, as I hate it too.

[Cavcraft]

Erm, I like it. However I watch lower league rubbish and I get to spend some quality time with my daughter so not all bad.Having said that some of the best times I've had have been following the team I support home and away and now my lad is playing for a Sunday league side it gives me enormous pleasure to watch him play. I fully understand why people don't like football just as hopefully people fully understand why I think F1 is utter gash and not really a sport at all!I can see why people generalise over football fans by the way but honestly they're not all knuckle dragging morons and for some it's a good way to spend an afternoon in the company of a few mates, having a laugh and then a few ales afterwards discussing the game.

[r.welfare]

I get bored with the "we" crowd on football as well. I'm not into football, and got bored with explaining I wasn't gay because of this to my colleagues, so just point to a photo of my wife and daughter now instead.Lower league stuff can be fun to watch though, and I did enjoy 5-a-side that I played weekly with work colleagues in my 20s. It's just I'm not really any good at any team sports (apart from basketball I seem to recall), so it's difficult to muster much enthusiasm for something that you don't like, innit?

[retrogeezer]

LOL...I've had some funny looks when I tell people I don't watch 'footy' 'So what team do you support then??''none''What, you don't like football? Whats wrong with you?'I do watch internationals (when I remember they are on) and some of the World Cup games though.Touring cars is where the action is....

[Cavcraft]

Touring cars are brilliant, been a couple of times to Oulton Park to watch it live and it's class.I used to like watching local league football at the weekends with the kids but the language was choice. I do swear a lot myself but not in front of them.Still, it used to be funny watching fat, talentless still drunken forty somethings have rings run round them by 17 year old kids.My lad is a decent player and I'd love to see him play for a non-league or league club as he's living my dream.