The grumpy thread

[Pete-M]

Probably because if everything was normal, there'd be a lot more suicides. Fuxake. Lighten up!

[ashmicro]

[Laws RTA 1988, sect 22 & CUR reg 103]

 

243

DO NOT stop or park

 

•near a school entrance

•anywhere you would prevent access for Emergency Services

•at or near a bus or tram stop or taxi rank

•on the approach to a level crossing/tramway crossing

•opposite or within 10 metres (32 feet) of a junction, except in an authorised parking space•near the brow of a hill or hump bridge

•opposite a traffic island or (if this would cause an obstruction) another parked vehicle

•where you would force other traffic to enter a tram lane

•where the kerb has been lowered to help wheelchair users and powered mobility vehicles

•in front of an entrance to a property

•on a bend

•where you would obstruct cyclists’ use of cycle facilities

 

 

Report the fucker, and give the cops a copy of your photo.

[Station]

I'm working with some bloke I know in starting 'a business' since December. It's been rough on the ground due to problems, but basically, have produced a shit load of work my side, and I'm not going to make presumptions, but not too sure what the other side is doing (basically, I'm a graphic artist, he's a programmer). I've done shitloads of work, and it can either fail or succeed as a profit making business, but either way, I'm not making money and I'm putting all into it, around trying earn a living and dealing with things that have to be done (at a request of doing it 12 hours a day - I don't think so).

 

Having recently been told that me doing work '10 minutes every night' isn't enough. My blood is still simmering, and while he doesn't grasp the time-scales needed to complete the work I'm doing, or accept the fact I have to work and just can't do this every moment I'm not working, I certainly spend more than 10 minutes every night. I've already nearly chucked the towel on several occasions, but I can't chance at my age losing out on something that has a 50% of doing well.

 

[retrogeezer]

If you want to read about real twat's then read this from my local rag yesterday, Talking about giving Suffolk people a bad name.

 

http://www.eveningstar.co.uk/news/woman ... p_1_399691

I didn't think the name was an issue if you had a marriage certificate?

[Lankytim]

 

My Unobtainium pre-2001 plate was undamaged therefore his face remains undamaged- for now.

Hey, Richard. Do you park there all the time? If so you are comitting the offence of "parking on offside at night", which is a £40 fine. Ive been done for it myself!

 

Park the other way round, im assuming your Vole has a towbar? If so your neighbour should smash his numberplate on it sooner or later.

[Station]

That's just ridiculous, how petty! I also can't believe the 'parking on the wrong side' is justifiable - how bored/hitler-esque must the warden be?

[RedSparrow]

Is nothing sacred? Why didn't the court (or whoever) that gave her the re-naming tell her to get out and never, ever come back unless it's a normal name?

Her first name was 'Austin' too...

[Minimad5]

The day i require some parking space outside, neighbours snotty ass daughters turn up and park everywhere

 

I over heard her say yesterday "What the fuck is that , a boat ?" about the Rebel. My reply would of not been so nice

 

 

 

parking on offside at night - That's the craziest thing i have ever heard, why can you get done for that ?

[RedSparrow]

Don't worry MM, someone refered to one of my TR7s as 'one of them Hondas' once.

[Lankytim]

Well, I had parked a 44 ton tractor unit in a quiet cul-de-sac and had previously knocked down a lamp-post (which I got away with). Next time I parked up there I parked the correct way round but had the wheels on the kerb. Got a ticket for "parking an HGV on pavement" Another £40!

 

I have to confess, I derseved it all. I probably pissed a few people off parking the unit there regularly. The lamp-post made a right racket at 4AM, too.

[Minimad5]

Another one arrives , roof down blasting "ANGEL OF COLOUR"

Have some respect for others, it is still morning.

 

I might just be a tw*t and drum ... Shall resist

 

 

Sorry just on my man period today

[Lankytim]

 

 

 

parking on offside at night - That's the craziest thing i have ever heard, why can you get done for that ?

Its because the red reflectors on the rear of the vehicle arnt showing on the right side of the road, and preseumably it can confuse stupid people and make them crash.

[Station]

Haha @ boat!

[retrogeezer]

 

 

 

 

parking on offside at night - That's the craziest thing i have ever heard, why can you get done for that ?

Its because the red reflectors on the rear of the vehicle arnt showing on the right side of the road, and preseumably it can confuse stupid people and make them crash.

Not only that but you get hundreds of twats that park on the offside with their headlights on blinding everyone driving towards them so yes, it can be dangerous.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Re this boat thing, put on a captains hat (and beard, why not) and ask her if she would like to be 'welcomed on board', give her a cheeky wink while you're on. She'll love it!

[Minimad5]

Mr_B , you are crazy

Made me "LOL" though.

 

I think she would just kick off (one of them women)

 

Anyway i shall post no more grumpy stuff , at this rate i'm going to be number 1 grumpy person

[trigger]

You could ask her if she wants to be Seamen Stains or Roger the Cabin boy.

[Station]

Fire a real cannon at her when she drives past. Watch her through a telescope as she climbs out of the wreckage of her car, calling her a 'scurvy pig'.

Also, mount a big sail on your 'boat', with a decent resemblance of the woman painted on, with the word 'C*NT' and an arrow pointing at her.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Maybe theres a way you can 'scuttle' her.

[trigger]

Would she be willing to climb your pole and sit on your crows nest?...

[ashmicro]

Obtain "Dive Dive Dive" By Bruce Dickinson, and play it at 11

 

Put and opening shot. Across your bows.

Got tunnel vision. Pull the sheets in now.

Let'em flap. Let'em rip.

This man of war gonna sink your ship.

Gonna blow you midships.

Gonna dive tonight.

There's no release when your deep down inside.

 

Dive dive dive

Dive dive dive

Dive dive dive

No muff too tough

We dive at five

[RedSparrow]

There is a chap driving round and round town in a renault scenic covered in England flags playing 3 Lions at full volume on repeat.

 

HE IS A BELL END.

[Richard]

Stuff

I've considered most of the suggestions above. They are all very tempting but I think he'll get what's coming to him without my intervention. I'm sure he pisses off other people, I'll let one of them do the business.

 

I had already decided on Lankytim's course of action. I don't normally park the "wrong" way and I won't be doing it again because I do indeed have a towbar- and an exhaust that is capable of coating his car with soot and partially-burned diesel.

[pogweasel]

There is a chap driving round and round town in a renault scenic covered in England flags playing 3 Lions at full volume on repeat.

 

HE IS A BELL END.

Jesus.

That man sounds like he needs at very best a stern talking to, if not a resound kick to the bollocks.

 

I wish to grump about my neighbour.

Well technically not her, but her nephew who comes round to do the gardening.

Every year I have tried to get my hedge nice and level along it's length, and every year without fail about a week after I have cut it, he comes along and cuts it again at a jaunty angle, so the top of the hedge is about 18in lower by the house than it is at the path.

Why he does this I DO NOT KNOW, but it gets right on my wick!

[garethj]

pog, surely some kind of swordfighting adventure with hedgetrimmers is the answer here?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

chop his legs off at a jaunty angle. So that one of them is 18" shorter 'at the body end'. Hopefully he will get the message and leave the hedge alone.

[pogweasel]

A DUEL!

 

Sadly, I broked my hedge trimmer today, with an impressive bang and big spark of elecktrickery!

[Polystratus]

 

My gripe is my neighbour. If he thinks I've parked in front of his house he will park his car right up against my car/van. Last night was the closest yet. Is it illegal to park like that? I'm sure it must be.

 

 

My Unobtainium pre-2001 plate was undamaged therefore his face remains undamaged- for now.

I'm not really suprised he's parked up like that, those cars have a dash thats about mile and a half deep.

[pogweasel]

I thought all these new cars had parking sensors that went spastic if came within 12" of anything else?

[Pillock]

Can't you get a mate to wait till the small hours and then leave a spare car right up against the back of his? He'll have no option but to ask you to move so he can get out, at which point you can explain exactly what a childish game he's playing. Or pretend to be out/in the garden/deaf.