The grumpy thread

[Father Ted]

If I turn on Radio 2 and hear someone singing about fucking fireflies again I am going to have a "Falling Down" moment!

Even Steve Wright introduced it the other afternoon by saying "I sense your getting just a bit tired of this song"

It hasnt made it to Smooth FM's drive time show then yet.

[Guest]

If I turn on Radio 2 and hear someone singing about fucking fireflies again I am going to have a "Falling Down" moment!

Even Steve Wright introduced it the other afternoon by saying "I sense your getting just a bit tired of this song"

It hasnt made it to Smooth FM's drive time show then yet.

The song or Steve Wright?I'm not much of a R2 listener, so at the risk of getting battered with a heavy object, what's the song?Work is getting to me again, after a period of indifference.The basic problem is that HR have a staggering inability to manage the staff available at certain times. It's all done in India, which is often useful.Like the rest of the gruel scrapers, I work shifts. The general pattern after being transferred to yet another team (outbound dialling) is every other weekend on. This weekend I'm in, ringing you up if your card details are out and apologising profusely for not being a YAHOO BOY from Nigeria.More likely it's for store ordering and the useless CSAs have taken a digit down wrong. Hey, how are you? Would you like to give me your card details at 9.30 am on a Saturday morning? What? You don't want to go through data protection? You're going into the store tomorrow because that's when your order arrives? No you won't, it hasn't been paid for.Sorry, I digress. This is what I do, ad nauseum.Earlier on today (before yet another system breakage) the management were running around like headless chickens because they realised there was no one on our team after 6PM (we stay open until 11) because of the aforementioned HR cock ups. Everyone was asked if they wanted to stay.....and a staggering zero people wanted to.Predictably the manager in question chucked their toys out of the pram and ranted on about how there was no cohesion and camaraderie in the office, and how we were all expected to do our part. Essentially, a load of euphemistic faux Blitz era bollocks.It was then pointed out that no-one wanted to stay for the following reasons:1. It was a Saturday.2. The 'overtime' that they so desperately wanted was at normal rate. Piss poor for a Saturday.3. Everyone who previously worked overtime (like myself) then pointed out that it never gets paid unless you ring up Payroll at hourly intervals and give them death threats. I'm still waiting on four hours overtime that I worked on an all nighter LAST OCTOBER.I've had to visit Payroll in person on more than one occasion to get my OT put on the system, after countless phonecalls promising they'll 'look into it'. Here's another tip - BACS TRANSFER. It can be done, and don't fucking argue with me about it. If you transfer the money that rightfully belongs to the angry Manc when you say you'll do it, he goes away and STOPS RINGING YOU.So here's some tips for management. Stop taking the piss, and you might get some back up when you need it. If Payroll weren't so fucking smug and complacent, it would grease the wheels somewhat. If you're up shit creek and you desperately need the manpower, offering extra time with no incentive after firing 50 people at random and leaving 20 others in doubt as to whether or not they'll have a job next week is not the brightest thing to do. Please, for the love of God, pay an on site systems expert to make sure the network drives work for more than 23 minutes at a time. Management have also introduced a 'continuous improvement' cycle, in response to what may or may not be a crap MAIA report. I have a feeling they're not going to like a lot of what they hear, because it's being conducted exclusively at our level. Bring it on, I can give them countless wanky Powerpoint presentations and dress in a nice suit to hammer my point home. I also have a large hammer in my toolbox.That's a distillation of what's been annoying me ATM. I think it's fairly clean and coherant when my previous diatribes are considered.

[pogweasel]

Have you given any thought to getting a less shit job?

[seth]

Whitevanman, I hope things work out OK and the little 'un is alright.There is a "Funny Old World" story in Private Eye this week and I think the person involved ought to get a grumpy old man award or something. 'Dr Thomas Koop complained to reporters in his laboratory at Biefiled University. "Snowflakes always have six corners yet they are typically depicted on Christmas cards and children's books as four, five or eight cornered crystals. This is sloppy science and it gives me sleepless nights because surely everyone knows that snowflakes are made of water molecules and link up via Hydrogen Bonds"'He also complains about the shape of raindrops in illustrations.

[Guest]

Have you given any thought to getting a less shit job?

Have you seen the jobs on offer where I live?Virgin Media, Virgin Media, Virgin Media, Thinkmoney, Virgin Media, CIS.And I can't work for the Co Op for various reasons I don't want to go into here. All call centres. I put 'NO CALL CENTRES PLEASE' on my CV and when some dullard from a recruitment agency rings up, I get offered a job in a call centre 30 miles further away from home for £250 a year more.Bell End: Hi Jon, I'm some wanker from FUCKFACE Employment Agency! I saw your CV on Monster and there's a couple of jobs that I think you'd like. The salaries are really competitive at £12,000 OTR without commission.Me: Are they for call centres? My CV says in big letters at the top that I don't want to work in a call centre. I don't like call centres, they do my head in.Bell End: Where do you currently work?Me: A call centre.Bell End: Well, there's a very good post at Virgin Media, and ooh, I have another one at ThinkMoney. They're sales consultant roles.Me: They're in call centres.Bell End: Well, you have to be open minded Jon. There's lots of opportunities......Me: [cutting in] ...If you upsell shit to idiots sat from a desk in a call centre. I don't want another job in a call centre. I work in a call centre and I dislike it more than you can possibly imagine.Bell End: I don't think you've got the right attitude......Me: [cutting in] What, to work in another call centre? To deal with agencies that don't read what I write on my CV? I think you might be right.Bell End: Well, er, would you like to come in for an assessment?Me: No, sorry, my cat's on fire.***CLICK***Anyway, if I can get Salford sorted out, I'll be going part time anyway in October, and it's not a bad student job as opposed to a laughable full time occupationI'm past caring on most work related issues at the end of the day. I'm going more like Hirst in that I regard most internicene issues as trivial except for when the matter of being paid what I owed rears its head.

[Rusty Pelican]

^^^^^^^^^^^I know I Shouldnt laugh Watanabe but the way you express yourself cracks me up , perhaps i should put you in the what makes me grin thread , It is totally shit out there job wise , im past caring with mine too , still theres no HR ( hand relieve ) to deal with so i should be greatfull

[Guest]

HR ( hand relieve )

How apt. I shall use this in future conversations with them upon driving to work in my new Shitroen Dog Shit 3.

[Guest]

With regards to HR/Payroll issues - I remember receiving my first pay packet at work, or rather, not receiving it. Bit strange - I'd got the forms with my bank details to HR over a week within the time limit, I double-checked my copy and they were all OK. Phoned up Payroll and the conversation was something like this (was a few years ago now):

 

"Yeah I don't seem to have received my pay"

"Oh, we're paying you the month after"

"You what?"

"We got the forms off HR a day late, so we'll need to pay you double next month instead"

"Right, so I'm not getting paid and no one was going to tell me of this, I was just expected to not really mind. I've got about three quid in change in my wallet, I'll just make that last until next month then, eh?"

"Well, we could send you a cheque"

"And when will that come in?"

"Well, we'd have to get it authorized and issue it first, then get it in the post to you, then you get it into your bank. I would say you'll probably have it the Monday after next"

"Brill, three quid's going to last me until then is it?"

 

In the end, I drove down to their office with a face full of scowl and was issued with some bizzare cheque which I had to take to their bank and be paid 6 weeks pay in cash, which I then walked across town with and put into my bank. Lovely.

[pogweasel]

It's not the end of the world though, is it??That's what you have credit cards & overdrafts for.Try chasing invoices for months on end, and you'll know pain, especially when you have other folks wages to pay and HMRC getting medieval on yo ass!I do find it amazing that the only employment on offer in the Manchester area is in call-centres, I need to stop casually voyeuring Constipation St when the Mrs is watching it.

[Guest]

Wasn't the end of the world as I drove down there and sorted it that afternoon (in my own time). I think it was just the way they assumed it wouldn't really matter and that there wasn't a need to contact me because presumably the sort of person who works in a low-paid office job will have enormous cash reserves to sit on.Plus I've never had credit cards. I tell a lie, I got one years ago to shut up the bank as they wouldn't stop hassling me to get one, then eventually got a letter telling me it had lapsed because I had never used it. Still doesn't stop them hassling me to get another, even last time when it was a proper tidy bird asking. She gave me the forms, I put them in a drawer, that was that.Do know the pain of chasing invoices though, as since my job was changed it's all I do, every single sodding minute of every sodding work day, presumably until I'm dead or something.

[seth]

The Bastard Weather. Still.I have an un MOT'd car sat outside on the drive that with all the work I've put into it over the last three months I would really like to have back on the road to get some enjoyment from and for Mrs Seth to use for her commuting as usual. I can't MOT it until I do some welding to it and this bastard weather is really frustrating. I need a day maybe two. Forecast for this week?Light RainHeavy rainLight RainHeavy Rain showerHeavy RainBalls.

[pogweasel]

The Bastard Weather. Still.I have an un MOT'd car sat outside on the drive that with all the work I've put into it over the last three months I would really like to have back on the road to get some enjoyment from and for Mrs Seth to use for her commuting as usual. I can't MOT it until I do some welding to it and this bastard weather is really frustrating. I need a day maybe two. Forecast for this week?Light RainHeavy rainLight RainHeavy Rain showerHeavy RainBalls.

+1 on weather!Not only do I have cars to fix, but it is also pissing on my chips, workwise. I'm doing a site-engineering job at the minute, but they've had to cut 6ft into the chalk / clay as it's on a hill and trying to sort out anything on that in the wet is fricking hard, plus the design is unneccessarily complicated and the groundworkers a bit simple, so you've got to peg out/instruct them on everything. What was supposed to be a days work is going to be more like 4, and you can bet your ass I'll get stiffed, and I get home wet and filthy... it's so mucky that you can't even change your shoes at the end of the day without the "clean" shoes getting caked, and sticky muck dripping off your trousers, therefore requiring a valet on the van and steam-cleaning of carpets at home, if I make £1 on this shit I'll be laughing.

[Des]

I found an avatar thing which I thought was really cool, but it's too wide and ballses up any page I post on. Ballscabs.

 

[vicsmith]

It's not the end of the world though, is it??That's what you have credit cards & overdrafts for.Try chasing invoices for months on end, and you'll know pain, especially when you have other folks wages to pay and HMRC getting medieval on yo ass!I do find it amazing that the only employment on offer in the Manchester area is in call-centres, I need to stop casually voyeuring Constipation St when the Mrs is watching it.

Medieval? The "chattels" letter?

[whitevanman]

if I make £1 on this shit I'll be laughing.

Luxuary............. When I were a lad.......

[Polystratus]

The Bastard Weather. Still.I have an un MOT'd car sat outside on the drive that with all the work I've put into it over the last three months I would really like to have back on the road to get some enjoyment from and for Mrs Seth to use for her commuting as usual. I can't MOT it until I do some welding to it and this bastard weather is really frustrating. I need a day maybe two. Forecast for this week?Light RainHeavy rainLight RainHeavy Rain showerHeavy RainBalls.

Same here - got one ready to MOT, and guess what we have today, snow again

[Guest]

I looked outside this morning to find that it had snowed, then I punched the wall so hard that I couldn't use my hand for a couple of minutes after. And further heavy snow due! It's an insult.Can't do anything now. Can't go into Dewsbury because it is too hilly, can't even give my cars a once-over as they're all covered in sodding snow. Today will be spent doing nothing - half of the weekend completely wasted.No doubt this will throw everything else out too - any work I'm having done to my cars will grind to a halt because the mechanic won't be able to get in tomorrow, also doubtful that the MOT I've got booked will go ahead. Plus I'm sure work will still expect me in at 8am for some bloody pointless meeting tomorrow and give me a ticking off because I don't set off to work in the middle of the night like every other tosspot.If anyone's in the area, bring me a gun and a bullet.

[Slaighty]

Why is oil sold in 4 litre packs? Just changed oil and filter on Mrs Slaightys Picasso (another potential grump) and 4 litres wasn't quite enough to refill the engine to the correct level. What happened to the 5 litre cans? Now I've got to go back for a rip- off 1 litre bottle.

[Timewaster]

Why is oil sold in 4 litre packs? Now I've got to go back for a rip- off 1 litre bottle.

You just answered your own question there!

[myglaren]

Why is oil sold in 4 litre packs? Just changed oil and filter on Mrs Slaightys Picasso (another potential grump) and 4 litres wasn't quite enough to refill the engine to the correct level. What happened to the 5 litre cans? Now I've got to go back for a rip- off 1 litre bottle.

Check this out. Not nessercelery what you are needing but they have a huge assortment in the eBay shop.My local motor factor sells oil in 5L too, no hassle.

[M'coli]

If anyone's in the area, bring me a gun and a bullet.

I was in Horbury last night, looking at an Imp. Bastard scat-nav took me virtually into the centre of Wakefield and back out under the M1, then on the way back ended up going through the whole of bloody Wakefield because there're no signs pointing to the M1, and I missed the turning at the Lupset. Not happy.

[Guest]

You're right actually, the signposting to the M1 is pretty poor considering the main roads up to it are fairly nondescript residential roads until the last minute.

[Cavcraft]

Arsebuckets:Lost tinternet connection. Six hundred fucking quid later (one new pc, one netbook for daughter) still no joy.Oh yippee, it was the router all along, there's another fifty sovs gone then.Now as if that wasn't enough the gear linkage has gone on the Espazz and it's stuck in 2nd or 3rd, and my new toy (get ready to laugh, it's a Vectra diseasel) is playing up, randomely switching from 'yellow spanner' (and therefore limp mode) and the EML.Two fucked cars, three fucked computers and a bastarding big bill.

[vicsmith]

The sight of snow may lead to an inward groan, but it shouldn`t do, really, the real source of my murderous hatred at these times is the fact that so many people try and pretend it doesn`t exist, as though there`s some sort of large cash prize for claiming the snow isn`t affecting you at all. To me, snow changes the course of the day, you have to work around it, instead of doing a paint job outside I might remove a seat and bring it inside to clean prioperly and dry off afterwards, or I might just sod working on cars and try and get all the bleedin` dog hairs out of the living room carpet or something, in other words, I`m not happy, but I adapt, and try to not waste the time.Far too many people however, are under pressure by ineffective, insipid middle-management types who sort of don`t really say you have to come in to work no matter what, but don`t encourage any idea that you can not come in and getting away with it going unnoticed, so the end result is thousands of people, a lot of them poor or inexperienced drivers, struggling under imagined duress to get to places where they are not really needed, in totally unsuitable vehicles, so the roads get clogged up with the ones that don`t make it, everyone has a totally crap time of it where there could have been an opportunity to leave the car on the drive, out of harm`s way, and do long put-off things, and the managers & bosses wash their hands of it all, they never forced them to come in, they just used their knowledge of the fact that the majority of the working stiffs lack the courage to allow their lack of arrival at work to be discussed briefly in the smoking shelter and then forgotten forever.Bit too early to say whether we`ve got all that to look forward to again, but if we have, don`t be angry at the weather, be angry at people being piss-poor, as usual.

[Tayne]

.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

This morning I got up early (well, 8am) to go to Buxton to collect a computer that Mutha_Bo11ox has bought off eBay. An easy job, if it hadnt fuggin snowed. Anyway I set off in my truck, and when I got out of Congleton and started to climb the hills, it was looking increasingly like a mission doomed to failure. The snowplough had been over in one direction, but no other cars had, so the road was slippy as fook and only one side was clear so I was expecting some goon to come slithering down towards me on my side of the road. Halfway up it became a total whiteout and I did not see any other cars during the whole climb. As there was no chance of turning round I did my best Pentti Arikkala effort and bounced revved and skidded up the hill and eventually made it to the top like a legend. I quietly congratulated myself for not getting stuck (at which point I would have become one of those totally ill-equipped twats you read about who get stuck in snow while on ridiculously unnecessary journeys). I slithered down the other side into buxton after flagging down and seeking advice off some geezer who came past eating a tray of baked beans in his lap as he drove along! Anyway the road out of buxton was closed thanks to some roadworks, and the diversion instructed me to go up some funny little road that was totally snowed out, I had no chance. So I was within 5 miles of my destination and had defeated the heavy snow, but was scuppered at the last hurdle by the wanky snowed-out diversion offered by derbyshire county council. Cheers BASTARDS

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I found an avatar thing which I thought was really cool, but it's too wide and ballses up any page I post on. Ballscabs.

 

This just caused to LOL my plums off BTW

[outlaw118]

On top of the shitty (rain/sleet/hail) weather wer're having pissing me off, I've just had the phone call I've been dreading.A good friend (who had some depression issues) topped herself last night. She'd been "unwell" for a while, was doing counselling and all that, and seemed to be doing ok. A row with her dumb-ass boyfriend last week had knocked her back, but I saw her friday night, and she seemed ok.I'm partly grumpy, partly annoyed, partly just plain sad.Thats two friends gone in a week, one to cancer, one to suicide. Great, I'm really looking forward to going out to work tomorrow, and dealing with the arsehole public.......

[whitevanman]

Gods I feel for you...I've had a couple of mates/aquantainces top themselves

[boobydoo]

Just had an awful week and a half trying to get my combination boiler repaired.Woke up two Saturdays ago with no hot water or heating. I know sod all about anything like this so call a local plumber out of Yellow Pages online. He agrees to come round 5.30 that day. £75/hr charge.He calls at 6pm to say he can't make it so will come at 9am Monday.Arrange to take Monday morning off work...he eventually arrives at 11.30. Now, the boiler is in a small loft above the kitchen, accessed via a hatch. There are some boards to walk on in front of the boiler."You won't get many plumbers to go up there, mate. Health and Safety. But I'll 'ave a look for ya."Tinkers with boiler for 15 mins. "Fans not working. Have to dismantle it. You got a leak aswell."Suddenly a load of water gushes out of the boiler." This things knackered. Waters probably gone onto the circuit board. It''ll cos about a grand to fix this. Might aswell get a new one. We fit 'em for 2k plus the VAT""Err, I think its only about 5 years old?" "Yeah, it's a Baxi...they're rubbish. Give us a grand deposit and I'll get a new boiler fitted by Wednesday. You get a 5 year guarantee. It'll have to be a condenser one so you'll need a new waste pipe to go on the outside of the house.""Err, it's Grade 2 listed, I'm not sure if I can have pipes willy nilly outside. Will have to check.""Well, we can put it inside but will have to drill through yer kitchen cupboards and connect it to the washing machine outlet. That'll be extra, mind"Decide to check with a friend if I really need a condenser boiler. He advises me to phone Baxi service and get them to take a look.So I get rid of this bloke who charges me £117.50 for doing nothing really...apart from leaving the boiler in bits.Take Wednesday off for Baxi man. He turns up. Extremely rude."Aint goin up there. Health And Safety. Them boards need fixing. Could put me foot through yer ceiling. Looks like someones been messing with it anyway ...can't repair it if someone else has looked at it. You'll need to get him to put it back together again first"" I've had no heat since Saturday. Could you not just take a look?""Nope".Decide to get a friend to fix new boards in the loft for a very reasonable £70.Get recommended to call British Gas. They come round on Thursday. "You'll need to move the hatch to the other side of the kitchen. Too restricted for access where it is.""Err, but I've had people up there already and I just got new boards put in.""Nah, you won't get a new boiler up there for a start but just to give you an idea , it'll be £3-4000 for a new one.""Can you not repair the one thats there""Not me, I just quote new ones. I can get someone round but you'll have to move the hatch first"5 days with no heat/hot water during a freezing week. A boiler in bits. I am getting rather stressed at this stage. Finally, a friend at work recommends his mate who is Corgi registered to take a look.Comes round last Saturday. Doesn't complain about the hatch, puts the boiler back together in about 20 minutes, detects a faulty circuit board probably damaged by the first idiot , orders new board, fixes it in Monday evening...£300 all in. And fixes a leaky tap for nothing!!I just cannot believe the unhelpfulness and disinterest in repairing anything these days by so called professionals!!