What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I'm sure LankyTim suggested an AHFR (Automatic Horse Face Recognition) system on the bridleway network to clamp down on untaxed/uninsured horses which sounds like a bloody good idea to me. The ABI reckon thare are over 2 BILLION UNINSURED HORSES on our roads every day of the week, unfairly pushing up costs for other horses who are not attempting to play the system.

[dugong]

I'm sure LankyTim suggested an AHFR (Automatic Horse Face Recognition) system on the bridleway network to clamp down on untaxed/uninsured horses which sounds like a bloody good idea to me. The ABI reckon thare are over 2 BILLION UNINSURED HORSES on our roads every day of the week, unfairly pushing up costs for other horses who are not attempting to play the system.

 

For everything else, there's PrittStick. 

[mat_the_cat]

And if the guilty party doesn't have a pot in which to piss then the poor fucker who is innocent gets cock all .

I wonder if there is any historical cases of people being injured by cyclists and horse/ riders ?

 

Probably loads. I'm guessing it was deemed sufficiently likely that with non motor vehicle accidents, the people involved would be able to pay up. Or put it another way, that in a large majority of car accidents, the guilty party would be unlikely to have the funds.

 

That said, my missus does have 3rd party insurance for her horse, to cover any damage it may cause whether she's riding him or not. Makes sense to in my book.

[twosmoke300]

Fray bentos

[mouseflakes]

Just imagine the nightmare it would be if an uninsured horse ran away and caused a massive pile up .

 

Happens all the time...

 

 

Not such a nightmare - shovel it into the boot and take it home for the garden.

[dugong]

Fray bentos

I travelled through Melton Mowbray today in an MG6 that lost third. 

 

[saucedoctor]

I travelled through Melton Mowbray today in an MG6 that lost third. 

 

 From what I've just been reading, you're lucky you didn't lose the windscreen as well. It seems that MG Curried Fried Wasp & Motor Concern have a somewhat "casual" attitude to screen bonding.

[Station]

This is a pretty good accolade wouldn't you say?

 

http://mg.co.uk/news/2014/04/24/-mg6-wins-award-for-best-handling/

 

Considering the motoring press gave it the lowest scores they possibly could give!

[dugong]

This is a pretty good accolade wouldn't you say?

 

http://mg.co.uk/news/2014/04/24/-mg6-wins-award-for-best-handling/

 

Considering the motoring press gave it the lowest scores they possibly could give!

 

It handles alright provided you don't mind overly light steering that twitches occasionally and loses assistance. 

 

The rest of the car is dreary. The leather smells like the school shoe section of Clark's back in the day. BRING BACK BIG GRIPPA.

Lots of AROnline foamers get all moist that it shares a few parts with the Rover 75. In all honesty, I don't know why SAIC \ OMG DESIGN STUDIO IN THE UK bothered to tool up for it. A waste of time.

 

It broke down spectacularly when it was two days old and has singularly failed to impress me since then. Work has two other (much older) cars - I'd rather pull a plug lead off the Charade and use that. 

 

I hope SAIC are in this for the long haul; based on the evidence I see before me, it's got a long way to go. 

[mouseflakes]

Making me grin tonight - Detectorists on BBC4.

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/b04kf095

[Doctormop]

Don't know if this is something to grin about or even admit in public but today I became a telephone sex pest.

About midday my wife and I are just heading out for some lunch and a general mooch around town (first day off together in 3 weeks) and telephone rings, non European sounding lady from computer maintenance is phoning "to helping me with slow running computer"

Being in a relaxed, day off, about to have scamp in the basket frame of mind I am very grateful for the call as my computer is taking ages to boot up and I'm really stuck without it as I do all my banking on line but don't really understand technical things.

I am reassured by my new friend `Sally` that she can help and to turn my computer on. I apologize for how long it is taking and comment that she sounds very nice, by now she is concerned that my PC has not loaded yet and is wondering why I want her to describe her uniform to me. I explain that our local crime prevention officer advises elderly computer users to ascertain that telephone callers are genuine by checking what uniform they wear,

Sal,y assures me she is genuine, works close by to me and describes her uniform albeit rather vaguely, she is reticent to give details about her stockings and foundation garments and rather brusquely asks if my Wife knows "How I am speaking to computer ladies on the telephone?"

I suggest that we ask my Wife and pass the phone over, Sally gets a bit tongue tied when my Wife invites her round for a threesome, "Sick people, you are sick sick people" is her last word to us.

[forddeliveryboy]

[barmatt]

It made me smile.......I Had to pull over the other night to grab a pic of the 17yr old Saab floppy top reaching it's 100k.

 

[Cavcraft]

It handles alright provided you don't mind overly light steering that twitches occasionally and loses assistance. 

 

The rest of the car is dreary. The leather smells like the school shoe section of Clark's back in the day. BRING BACK BIG GRIPPA.

Lots of AROnline foamers get all moist that it shares a few parts with the Rover 75. In all honesty, I don't know why SAIC \ OMG DESIGN STUDIO IN THE UK bothered to tool up for it. A waste of time.

 

It broke down spectacularly when it was two days old and has singularly failed to impress me since then. Work has two other (much older) cars - I'd rather pull a plug lead off the Charade and use that. 

 

I hope SAIC are in this for the long haul; based on the evidence I see before me, it's got a long way to go. 

 

 

Apologies if I've missed it, but have you done a (written) road test on it? I'd love to read it if you have, cheers.

[Pillock]

I'm loving the MG Cars "thing". Between foamy-mouthed forum members, a complete lack of cars on the road (that haven't got sponsorship or dealer decals on them) and resale values plummeting faster than shares in the 1970s DJ Babysitting Service, it's fantastic.

 

Reliability issues are the icing on the cake. From what I can tell, there's a forum member justifying that it's OK the windscreen was only half bonded in, and nobody can prove it anyway.

[myglaren]

Myglaren - If you got the Tun 1401 for £30 you haven beaten all my whisky bargains on one single transaction.

Did you enjoy the bottle you did get?

 

HillmanImp is closer to the mark but the exchange rate helps.

Was OK.  Generally prefer Irish.

I hadn't heard of it before then it was mentioned in "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" that I read the following week.

[Asimo]

I changed my facebook "location" to Siberia; the targeted adverts are now in Russian and therefore less annoying.

And one of them is for Datsun!

 

I had no idea the Datsun brand had been exhumed. I wonder if there is a 21st century Datsun in the UK yet?

[beko1987]

Just briefly followed an F reg light blue booted sierra! F88somethingsomethingsomething

[beko1987]

And, I broke my knob on the way home...

[Pillock]

Can't do wooden. Wooden has been done. Have you thought of a gargoyle, or a live ferret, or Argon, or the Isle of Wight as a replacement?

[fordperv]

And, I broke my knob on the way home...IMAG1520.jpg

 

 

i bet it was over excitement of following the sierra, ive nearly broke my knob over a few old fords in the past

[beko1987]

I can't have a wooden gearknob love...

Why?

Cos its been done before

What?

Knobvan!

What the fuck are you on about

I can't have a wooden knob because its been done before on the knobvan

Your stupid, why can't you just get another proper knob?

Because thats boring! Wonder what bit of hoover I can use instead...

Your strange...

[Station]

Workmates who spend 1/2 - 1 hour in the toilet having a dump!

I'm in and out, 2 minutes max. What the hell are they doing in there??

[cms206]

Workmates who spend 1/2 - 1 hour in the toilet having a dump!

I'm in and out, 2 minutes max. What the hell are they doing in there??

When I dump on company time I always aim for half an hour. In fairness if I've got a good book I can spend an entire afternoon on the dunny in the house.

[spike60]

Workmates who spend 1/2 - 1 hour in the toilet having a dump!

I'm in and out, 2 minutes max. What the hell are they doing in there??

Letting you do the work?

[AlabamaShrimp]

Letting you do the work?

Getting piles

[beko1987]

Do they take their phone? I average about 20 minutes, enough to check here, Facebook, vacuum forum, blinkfeed and pick my nose. WiFi is stronger in the disabled toilet if you ever visit our office...

[RoadworkUK]

When I dump on company time I always aim for half an hour. In fairness if I've got a good book I can spend an entire afternoon on the dunny in the house.

 

I hate those occasions when taking a crap earns me less than £3.50

[Negative Creep]

Finally moving house on the 1st, and after 32 years I'll actually have my own house. Going to be expensive (no spare money to play with cars) but the freedom and privacy will be worth it.

 

Long shot, but anyone in the area have a white van/large estate and could help with the move?

[Pillock]

I'm usually cruising the Sexism thread, earning money, avoiding people.