Autoshite Quote of the Year Thread 2017

[twosmoke300]

But not a single bolt will undo without gas !

[somewhatfoolish]

Nearly 6 grand for a Birmingham El Camino and he's spelt it Morris Itel.

 

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1983-Morris-Itel-Pickup-Truck-Classic-Car-/132209748498?hash=item1ec850aa12:g:pjsAAOSwdGFYtJwY 

[Junkman]

French exceptionalism: mintel, talky Nudie films, existentialism and LHM, all sadly becoming things of the past!

[UmBongo]

Noticed how that prick TITMARSH is trying to "TALK PROPER" now his got a knighthood for sucking up to royalty.

How the fuck can anyone deserve a GONG for weeding LIZ's  garden.

Now he's thinkin he's a friggin antiques "expert" with the hoypaloy on daytime ITVs  MASTERPIECE ..........WONKER

 

Courtesy of our friend, Noseypoke.

[DeeJay]

http://autoshite.com/topic/28303-oh-no-another-one-of-those-boring-ggg-collection-threads-yawn-etc-etc-caution-renault-16-content/page-7?do=findComment&comment=1236496

 

 

So yes, it is a 1967 Renault 16.

Which makes it exactly the model before the one you can get spares for.

 

 

 

Junkman, from his Renault 16 collection thread.

Made me laugh.

[Junkman]

Was ist der neue Freund von Steffi Graf vom Beruf?

 

Grafiker.

[bunglebus]

^  Must be a Hitchcock film, he always made a cameo appearance,  I can see his reflection on her coat...

 

From the cars and girls thread. Think you need http://autoshite.com/uploads/monthly_06_2017/post-5582-0-72085700-1497054390.jpg to put it in context...

[tooSavvy]

Junkman.

 

1999, after which manual column change finally became something you do in Excel.

 

On column changes

 

 

TS

[Dave_Q]

Anyway I've been told/reminded by the wife that I'm only allowed 3 cars maximum and just because one is a classic, I can't make up exemptions...

 

I do it all the time:

 

"I didn't buy it, it was given to me"

"It's a van"

"It's a motorcycle"

"Look, it's not a car, it's a tricycle"

"It's not a car, it's quality used spares"

"It's cheaper than hiring a car"

"I needed a car to get to the tip and I'm not insured on my dad's vehicle"

"The car in the drive isn't mine, it's Junkman's and he's just visiting"

[spartacus]

Just to be clear here, if you have room in your garage or on your driveway, you do not yet have "too many cars". 

 

cdwood2010, on buying more cars

[Junkman]

Can you get 1:24 balaclavas and HiAb?

 

On Italeri rereleasing the old ESCI 1:24 Escort MKII in the Shite in Miniature thread.

[Junkman]

Shirley since the model T was all conquering and made up the majority of cars on the planet, the others must have been the odd ones?

[chaseracer]

AS is like that hidden platform in the Harry Potter films except that it would lead to a fantastic car auction that only had stuff from the 80's and 90's and the prices never went above 200 quid even with fees.

[oldcars]

This gem from Cort16

 

The 166 had the most contrived rear suspension setup I've ever seen . Mine had a weird rear camber so I put it up on a lift , looked at it, put it back down and immediately listed it on eBay .

[DSdriver]

BFG's reply to a much earlier question in SQA by Louise

 

Posted 14 July 2017 - 04:40 PM

 

1) Is it true that there are hardly any shared body parts between the Princess and the Ambassador?'

 

.. a spokesman from the Royal household declined to make comment on such allegations.

 

It took him a while to thinkup the reply but it was worth the wait

[chaseracer]

There's another problem with older cars ^  If you leave a job because of having to justify the cost-versus-return, you generally find you're stuck with a car you can never justify investing in the repair of.  That in turn gives you a car that's difficult to sell on because nobody else wants to fork out to get it fixed for the same reason.  The job will probably cost just as much now as it would have five years ago, the only difference is the car's financial value has dropped.  It's sentimental value has probably done the inverse.  If you like it and can't afford to replace it with something better, then fix it.  Might take a while to get the funds together, but sod the return you might get further down the line in the future.  If anyone sits down with all their receipts and looks at what they've invested in a car they quickly find they've lost money whether it's a £100 banger or a £10,000 classic.

 

Stop worrying about the financial return and fix the car if you like it (and can afford to, obviously) or sell it on and take the loss on the chin.  Also, never be afraid to compromise on cosmetics.  A working car you can drive and enjoy is worth far more than a buggered one with lovely paint.

[oldcars]

This in Cort's MG thread. Under used words are the old disco biscuits.

 

I didn't think it would be my thing.I remember them being a bit of a joke at the time and if you'd said to me 1994 I'd be rubbing my trousers over one, a rough one at that 20 odd years later Id tell you to check your pint for disco biscuits.

[DeeJay]

OFFLINE   The Moog

Rank: Lancia Gamma

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Brakes bled I now have a pedal harder than a piss head who thinks you have been staring at his bird. 

 

Moogs motors, always a good read

[spartacus]

...and spent most of its life in a sea-water lashed on-street parking bay getting shat on by gulls the size of a condor.

 

Mercrocker, commenting on the life of an 'island car'.

[outlaw118]

Exiled Tat Hoarder on the GOM Fred

 

 

the 12 sandwich eating fat useless excuse for a lard arse

 

Describes me pretty accurately tbh

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Can you like a like?

 

[eddyramrod]

 

Repainting this car would be as culturally negligent as demolishing a Brutalist car park.

Renault 6 Rescue thread

 

Who uses the phrase "Culturally negligent" these days?  A* for that, Angyl!

[vulgalour]

I have reached the conclusion that if the people who frequent this site had a gun put to their heads they still could'nt buy a running, driving,complete car in good condition.

[Junkman]

It's probably an Autoshite first that something from an introductionary post of a new member

gets posted here, but this is just too epic:

 

I think my new mantra for Renault 6 repairs is "Almost everything is almost impossible".

 

I suppose it serves us right for buying a right-hand drive, front engined, front wheel drive car fitted with an engine and gearbox designed for a left-hand drive, rear engined, rear wheel drive car.

[Brodders]

Bren basking in the magnificence of Cavcraft's fleet.

 

Billy that photograph of your fleet looks so utterly fucking depressing it should be adorning the cover of a smiths album.

[vulgalour]

Renaults. 

 

Welcome to French. If it doesn't have Mole grip marks on it, it's not been serviced.

[somewhatfoolish]

I think this would be too shonky even for a collective AS purchase.

 

I bet it's roofing felt that the underneath is repered with, with a big mlerm of hot tar to seal it all up.

 

Mostly for the use of the word mlerm, which ought to be but probably isn't in Roger's Profanisaurus.

 

[chaseracer]

Of the Manchester Autotest in August...
 

Whereas the Saab looked more like an attempt to thread a needle with a slab of square sausage.

 

[spartacus]

"My step-mother has just got a tractor."

 

Only on Autoshite...

 

Form the excellent tractor thread by Vin.

[PiperCub]

Thank you gents - after a shit-typical weekend twelve hour shift with no break at all, reading this has cheered me up no end!