USA Autoshite

[62 Austin]

Would there be any American vehicles that could qualify as autoshite? There must be some that you have driven, seen, or seen a picture of that made you think "That's not right!" based on either mechanicals or looks.

[TataBobu]

Pontiac Aztek, based on looks and engine specs.

[derskine]

Pacer...

[CHRIS1980]

Renault-Alliance.

[Taff]

none of them. All American cars are magnificent and beyond reproach

 

#fact

[mercrocker]

I should like to nominate the Escort GT of c.1989.   A slightly bloated XR3-a-like that boasted* a 1.9 litre (sorry, liter) CVH that, had it not been emasculated with cat and smog spec would have delighted the whole of Essex.  As it stood (on stilts) it was a wallowy, gutless blancmange that apparently contained 110 horses somewhere.   It reminded me of a rubber bumper MGB against the European Escort (without the MGB's pleasant ride compromise) and I never really saw the point of it.

[Alexg]

All 80's Yanks

[John F]

Taff, on 26 Oct 2015 - 08:08 AM, said:

none of them. All American cars are magnificent and beyond reproach

 

#fact

 

Keep taking those dried frog pills, Bursar!

 

(PS apparently a lot of americans don't understand irony...)

[chaseracer]

(PS apparently a lot of americans don't understand irony...)

 

 

In which case: Chevrolet Corvette.

 

[cort16]

Pretty much all of them from about 1978 to 2004.

 

The prosecution calls it's first witness.

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/chrysler-new-yorker-/262111828477?hash=item3d071519fd:g:CX4AAOSwgQ9V0dz2

[Taff]

Keep taking those dried frog pills, Bursar!

 

(PS apparently a lot of americans don't understand irony...)

 

or the Welsh!

[John F]

or the Welsh!

 

That's understandable though, the Welsh have got other things on their mind...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-o2CcUjIP0

 

 

[Asimo]

Chevrolet Corsica. A grim sort of car bought almost exclusively by rental companies.

 

 

Imagine driving an automatic & front drive 1972 Moskvich with a BMC B series engine.................

[Junkman]

America has an impeccable track record of churning out mighty fine shite by the boatload.

[danthecapriman]

Thing is though, I'd rather have american shite than the utter crap we got over here! I'd much rather have that Corsica than a similar age Astra. Same for the New Yorker.

 

I think I've got serious issues!

[Asimo]

This is what you want as Ameri-Shite, Well, what I want: a two door £200 barge.  

All mod cons including mot. https://www.gumtree.com/p/ford/ford-thunderbird-coupe/1139329107

 

[Taff]

This is what you want as Ameri-Shite, Well, what I want: a two door £200 barge.  

Capture.PNG

All mod cons including mot. https://www.gumtree.com/p/ford/ford-thunderbird-coupe/1139329107

 

if you ignore the front end, the body from the A post backwards has more than a hint of 635CSI to it

[conkerman]

I really, really want that....

 

Sent from my D5803 using Tapatalk

[chaseracer]

if you ignore the front end, which has been hijacked from a Daewoo Espero, the body from the A post backwards has more than a hint of 635CSI to it

 

[DSdriver]

PT cruisers. I win.

[chaseracer]

Nobody wins with a PT Loser...

[62 Austin]

Chevrolet Corsica. A grim sort of car bought almost exclusively by rental companies.

 

Capture.PNG

 

Imagine driving an automatic & front drive 1972 Moskvich with a BMC B series engine.................

Kinda like the movies that are so bad they go directly from film to rental dvd.

[62 Austin]

That's understandable though, the Welsh have got other things on their mind...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-o2CcUjIP0

 

 

Isn't Wales the place with the town whose name requires the most number of letters in the world to spell? Cwmfarfignuggetmeadow or something. A 1000 pardons...meant to say Llanfairpwllgwynyll.

[Matt]

I can't work out if the Geo Metro is more or less shite than our Swift. They're more gopping for sure and almost universality much, much lower spec but the Swift was one of or thee cheapest new car in Britain at one point which has to count for something.

 

[62 Austin]

Pretty much all of them from about 1978 to 2004.

 

The prosecution calls it's first witness.

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/chrysler-new-yorker-/262111828477?hash=item3d071519fd:g:CX4AAOSwgQ9V0dz2

 

 

The car in the advert really isn't so bad with "no leaks, bangs or smoke" except for bringing to our attention that the cassette player is all electric. Where might you find manually-driven cassette players? I learned to drive in a New Yorker, but it was a 1956 with a 354 Cu. In. hemi V-8.

 

The prosecution has led a sheltered life if he is not familiar with these three characters over in the witness box:  

1. Chevrolet "Vega".....my Aunt and Uncle had a brand new one and the engine went as they were speeding down a California freeway...I don't mean failed - it actually fell off of the car
2. Ford "Pinto".....National Lampoon Magazine took a test drive of one and said it was without a doubt the finest 4-wheel motorcycle built in America
3. Chrysler/Daimler/Fiat "Omni".....what can you say about a company that bought 50 new VW Rabbits and tried to copy them

Maybe you were spared their export to your country during the 1970s. Or the United Kingdom has strict laws preventing autoshite to be exported to the land of Bentley, Rolls-Royce, Jaguar and Aston-Martin.

[mercrocker]

You had to be a determined shite-ist to get a Pinto or Vega into the UK.   However, I am afraid to say we built the Omni here, known as Chrysler/Talbot Horizon.  Far from being a bad car in my view but I have never driven a captive import one in the US.   You can't blame Fiat for that one either and its best to leave Daimler out of any discussion involving the US Motor Industry with anybody in the UK - we have no recognition of the Daimler element of latter-day Mercedes Benz operation, certainly not the bit that involved Chrysler.   

 

Surprised nobody has nominated the K-Car yet, although I used to drive my Dad's Reliant and found it a comfortable, inoffensive thing.  

[Tamworthbay]

With the exception of the 69 camaro ss all yank cars look shite, with absolutely no exceptions all yank cars drive shite. My brother lives near Boston and bought a viper (compensation for going bald, how I laughed) it was shite. They all are,and the interiors are made by the people who do the plastics for chocolate boxes.

[62 Austin]

To me the low point was the Seventies when I got in some new car and a posh female voice said: "Door ajar." while another said: "Please fasten seat belt." and having the lights on with the engine off caused some sort of "Ding! Ding! Ding! " to go off...............all at once. The owner had just bought the car and later told me it drove him nuts, so he took out some nippers and started cutting wires 'til the noise stopped.

 

It wouldn't be so bad if you could program the little voices yourself, say, get the actors from Red Dwarf to say things like "Swirly Thing Alert!" -- "Take the smegging e-brake off if you want to get over to Kachanski's and have some Chicken Vindaloo Surprise with her!" -- "Smeg off, you can't go warp 9 in this without hyperdrive thingies!"

[Taff]

With the exception of the 69 camaro ss all yank cars look shite, with absolutely no exceptions all yank cars drive shite. My brother lives near Boston and bought a viper (compensation for going bald, how I laughed) it was shite. They all are,and the interiors are made by the people who do the plastics for chocolate boxes.

What about the '68 Camaro ss?

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Rusty Pelican]

Pacer...

AMC Pacer is so shite its great , cant think of any other car with odd sized doors - i want one