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Dave's shonkers - the vultures are circling


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None of my vehicles are really interesting enough for their own thread, so I'm going for a tat blog style consolidated thread.


The modern* - Citroen Berlingo 2.0 HDi




The best and only photo I have of it.

Generally reliable but showing it's 153k miles in various areas.

It's good at hauling people and things around, that's about all I can say.

Current status - off road for fixing of torrential oil leak and floppy gear change.


The classic* - BMW 318iS




Photo stolen from seller's ad.

A recent £292 ebay purchase.

I thought I would strip it out and do some track days but after driving it for a while I'm not sure now.

112k miles, some sort of service history, far from a creampuff but hasn't been messed about with like so many.

Check out the orange indicators and standard 15 inch rims. SOAVE.

Current status - daily use.


Motorbike 1 - Honda VFR750




Has done me well as a 'first big bike' but it's replacement is already lined up.

Current status - Awoken from winter slumber and with MOT station pending results tomorrow.


Motorbike 2 - Honda Fireblade




Bought cheap as needs gearbox looking at - jumps out of second (they all do that if they've been ragged sir.)

Current status - gearbox repair is after Berlingo on to-do list, hoping for on the road by June.



So there they are. Not very interesting but I will update the thread with my with my various spannerings/misadventures/getting bored and selling them all etc.

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Today's action.


After a recent jetwash the Berlingo's oil leak upgraded itself from moderate to excessive, so action was required.


Up on stands and had a look. Bottom of sump covered in oil, no clear leak path from above.


Wiped off the sump and not many seconds later had this.




That'll be the sump having rusted through then.


Gear linkage was removed from the car after much swearing.


This picture is at the joint between the lever and the linkage. I already knew this was the source of the problem but thought the hole in the outer bit had worn. I was wrong!




That 2mm diameter pin is the remains of a 6mm bolt. Would have ended up with no gears at some point in the future.


This does however mean that rather than trying to weld up the old linkage, I can probably get away with a new bolt. If I can get the old one out anyway.



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I bet that Postman Pat van goes ok with a 2.0HDi. But not as well as a CBR.

Those pre-facelift Blingos aren't too ugly either.


The rest of the engine must be fairly leak-free if it's rusted through from the outside. At least it's a fairly simple fix.


I think wor Will had a gearchange fail from a sheared pin like that on his 205/306 hybrid.

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Loved my old (RR-S) Fireblade. Over 110,000 miles done when I sold it after 5 years faultless ownership. It still looked good and shiny, but when the new owner stripped all the plastics off................OMFG, what a mess. Everything hidden from view was corroded to buggery.

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I bet that Postman Pat van goes ok with a 2.0HDi. But not as well as a CBR.

Those pre-facelift Blingos aren't too ugly either.


The rest of the engine must be fairly leak-free if it's rusted through from the outside. At least it's a fairly simple fix.


I think wor Will had a gearchange fail from a sheared pin like that on his 205/306 hybrid.


The van isn't too bad to be honest, they don't weigh much so shift OK. I did have an actual van version previously with the 1.8 n/a XUD, even that wasn't too slow but topped out at a somewhat frightening 84mph on a motorway in Belgium.


The CBR I've yet to ride as I bought it broken and can't insure it for a price I'll pay until I've got 1 year no claims in June. It's 'only' got 20% more power and 10% less weight than the VFR but I think it will be in a different league performance wise.


I have actually fired a PM in the general direction of Will as I thought he may have a sump stashed somewhere, the XUD one is the same I believe.


Loved my old (RR-S) Fireblade. Over 110,000 miles done when I sold it after 5 years faultless ownership. It still looked good and shiny, but when the new owner stripped all the plastics off................OMFG, what a mess. Everything hidden from view was corroded to buggery.


The blade has got a bit of road rash down the r/h/s and a mismatched panel, I will be taking it all off to get the engine out so will be able to show what it looks like underneath. Not too bad from what I can see but this one has only done about 30k.





Little to report today, VFR had the rear brake light switch disconnected and handlebars touching the tank on full lock, the garage are going to adjust and pass it for me, will collect it tomorrow AM and go to work on it.


Spent a futile few mins trying to press the remains of the old bolt out of the blingo gear linkage in the vice, needs moar grinder but it's a bit late now with the baby asleep upstairs.

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I ground off the bolt head and had another go at pressing the bolt out in the vice.




Oh dear.


So I took it to work and a nice boy in the workshop got it out for me with fire and brute force.


New bushes turned up today so I reassembled the linkage.


Fitted it tonight and all seems well.


I am 50% of the way through replacing the sump, old one is off but I need new bolts as the replacement sump is a thicker alloy job off an air conditioned model.

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Is that VFR an FK? Mine is identical apart from white wheels and a thick layer of dust.


Last ridden 5 years ago and counting :-(


Still want an Urban Tiger 'Blade. Can't remember the last time I saw one.



Yes it's an FK. White wheels are correct for the factory colour scheme, mine came with the black. I think white would look better but I'm not planning to have them repainted.


Mine spent 2009-2014 off the road from the MOT history and doesn't seem to have suffered from it.



Dink I snapped one of those crap vices in 2 as well a couple of months back pressing a rose joint out, i ended up getting a used record vice as a replacement, best thing I ever did


That's the plan, I was quite impressed with this vice when I got it but it's clearly a piece of shiny shite from China.


Have got a few Records on watch at the moment and will pick one up when there's one for the right price locally.

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So I went to my friendly local fasteners place today for some bolts.


M7 x 20mm and 40mm.


"Ooooh sorry, we don't stock anything in M7. Try the dealer."


So I rings the local Citroen dealer.


"Hello, I'd like to purchase a small handful of bolts pls."


"Certainly sir, that will be £32.something plus VAT."



Double you tee actual eff.


So I've had to order them from a fasteners place in Walsall for a still salty £20, including £7.50(!) p&p.


Not ideal but the new sump was £20, so at £40 all in I've still saved £10-20 on a new pressed steel one and the alloy one won't rust.

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Spent an exciting Friday evening putting the sump back on the Berlingo.


All went to plan although the oil pressure light made me nervous by taking just a few seconds too long to go out.


Sorry for the mainly boring action so far, future updates to include motorbike engine insides.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Found some time over the last week or so to make a start on the CBR.


First job was to dig it out from the back of the garage.




Both tyres have gone down while it's been stood which is annoying.


This pic also shows the road rash down the RHS where it's been dropped, and the non-matching middle panel off a 96-97.


The Micron can I'm not keen on but I do have the standard one to go on.


Got the panels and exhaust removed:




Then the next time I had an hour spare got the fluids drained and everything else disconnected:




Went up today to finish the job.




Nice bike mister, what's the rocker cover made of?






Berlingo being handy.




I understand Mr Honda made some efforts to keep the engine lightweight. I did manage to get it into and out of the van on my own, but will probably look for this "assistant" the HBOL kept mentioning to refit it.


Engine in it's new home in my workshop mancave cellar.






In other news, the VFR must have heard about it's impending replacement, and demanded my attention by stranding me at work with an electrical issue. I think it's probably the ignition switch.


Berlingo converted to recovery mode to bring it home tomorrow.




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Recovered the VFR with just the one comment from a co-worker that it would never fit.










Anyway I couldn't reliably replicate the fault to troubleshoot, but I've cleaned up the connections to the ignition switch and been for a short ride, all was well.


Checked the charging and it was OK for an elderly Honda, 13.9v at idle and 14.something at 5000rpm.


I will leave it off road for a few days and regularly check it starts before going any distance on it.


I also whipped the sump off the CBR engine to see if I could see what was wrong.


Turns out you can't see much.




Poor pic but you can see some damage to the shift drum there. Needs a full stripdown to determine what else is needed.

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  • 2 weeks later...

So, this happened.




Not too bad a job, probably took about 90 mins spread out as the odd few mins here and there when I got a chance.


Here is the main culprit, countershaft second gear. This is a poor pic but you can see the dog, the bit on the side of the gear in the rear of the pic, damaged to the point of nearly being triangular.




This is the replacement. I got a full gearbox for £130 from the bay. I'd seen it listed a few times at £150 and not sell so managed to get a few quid off. It's from a 2002 900 Hornet, which has the same engine but hopefully less thrashed.


The dogs are slightly worn on one edge but considerably better than the old one.




I took the clutch in to work to measure the plates against the spec, they're about 20% worn so good to go again.


In other fleet updates, I managed to scrape the Berlingo bumper on the wall outside my house, and the VFR still has its mystery electrical problem.


About 4 times out of 5 I get no lights on the dash. If they come on it starts fine.

Battery voltage is fine and it's charging OK.

I've spent all of 10 mins on it during which I think I've ruled out the ignition switch.


I'm focussing my limited fixing time on getting the CBR ready to go on the road on 8th June. Will have another look at the VFR once the CBR is done but I may just have to sell it as is. I'm sure the problem could be fixed for £notmuch with some time and patience but I'm short of both at the moment.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Further gearbox post mortem.


Shift drum, new on the left, old on the right.




Shift fork, top view.




Shift fork, worn thin through abuse.




So overall I'm pretty confident the second hand gearbox will fix the problem. A new shift drum from Honda is £140ish so at £130 for the lot I think I did alright.


In worse news, I rang David Silver today about the bolts and clutch springs I ordered last week. Some of the bolts are on back order from Japan and not expected for a couple more weeks.


Will probably get on with the next job on my to-do list in the meantime which is cambelt on the Berlingo. Looking forward to losing all the skin on my knuckles doing that.

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Nice to see obvious wear in the gearbox, I had the gearbox die on my zx10r and Kawasaki said they all do that, we don't know why but that will be a few thou for a new gearbox.


Stripped it and found the ball bearings in the positive neutral finder ball bearings had lost their case hardening,got some ball bearings for a few pence and jobsa goodun


Don't forget to reverse flush the pickup strainer if you've had bits flaking off the shift forks

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Tonight I did a small fixing.


I spent an hour or so playing "chase the electric" on the VFR on Friday with a wiring diagram and a multimeter.


Eventually found a section of loom where if I wiggled it, I could turn my failure mode on and off.


Sliced it open and found this.




There's evidence of prior bodgery, the red wires which are the main power supply for everything were joined by elderly electrical tape with green powder inside.


I presume it has been fixed in a twist'n'tape style at some point in the past and the wire has disintegrated over time.


I soldered in a new section, taped the joints with premium BRANDED duct tape, and re-wrapped the loom.


A satisfyingly cheap fix, even if you include the £11.99 I paid for a soldering iron.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Some small updates.


VFR is now gone.


In a surprising turn of events, the first person to come and view it bought it with no messing or complications. Lovely.


I finally received this on Wednesday.




I ordered these parts on 26th May with a quoted delivery of 5-7 working days.

They finally arrived after something like 17 working days as apparently some bits had to come from Japan or something.


Anyway, I probably won't have time to get the bike all done this weekend but should be able to get the engine built back up and ready to go.

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  • 3 weeks later...



So the fireblade engine went back together no probs and made it's way back into the bike over the course of a week or so.

The motherflipper passed MOT first time as well.

Some advisories for tyres, chain, rear brake pads, which I have ordered the bits for and will sort shortly.


Have some pictures of various stages of the process.














The Berlingo has been put in the garage and I've started on the cambelt.

About an hour in and I've nearly got the cambelt covers off.

Cheers for that 1 bolt halfway down the back of the engine that you can only move 1 click at a time, Citroen.


BMW is therefore in use in its place, and has now got RIMZ YO.

I bought these (style 32s) not long after I bought the car.

A mate has given them a rattle can refurb for me, took him ages but he only charged me £20 a wheel and I think they look alright.




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  • 2 months later...

Remember this thread? Apparently neither did I.


Brace yourselves for an update.


So what was I doing again? The cambelt on the Berlingo. Went fine with 1 slight exception.




Noticed this was wrong on a Friday, when the factors I bought it from were closed on the Saturday for Eid.

Bought the right one from Andrew Page and got refunded for the wrong one later.


Water pump was a plastic impeller so glad to get that changed.




Actually now I think about it I'm sure this cambelt change was more traumatic than that, I'd decided to change all the engine mounts "while I was there" as it felt to me like the engine was moving around, obvs this part of the job was a massive ballache and made no difference to perceived engine movement.


Shortly after this the car did 1000 or so trouble free, heavily loaded miles taking the family on holiday to Dutch Holland, and also to Welsh Wales.




I feel I should give the Berlingo more credit as it's actually the ideal car for my current needs. 

Carrying a family of 4 with endless camping gear and equipment? Check.

Putting a new Ikea wardrobe in the back, while the boot still contains the old wardrobe that you haven't taken to the tip yet, without folding the seats forward? Can do.

Actually being a decent steer due to "greatest hits of Peugeot" chassis (306 front, 405 rear)? Check.

Able to easily get to and cruise at European motorway-ish speeds, while returning 40-50mpg? No problem.


The only thing I think I'd change it for would be something the same but bigger, I'm probably waiting for the VW Caddy Maxi to be in my price range.


That's why it's about to go through it's second MOT with me, a rare occurrence for my cars.

It's bound to fail as I took the BMW in this week after mainly standing all summer, and it flipping passed needing only a bulb and a wiper blade.


In bike news, there is no news, the Fireblade continues to excite and transport me with ruthless Honda efficiency.

1 rear indicator is a bit floppy but that's down to the idiot who badly fitted an undertray/tail tidy type thing in the past.


Soz for the minimal pics and big wall of text and congratulations if you read this far.

Your reward is this bad photo of a car I spotted and don't know what it is.



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  • Dave_Q changed the title to Dave's shonkers - the vultures are circling

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      1989 Volvo 340 DL. G67 AVN. I bought this for £80. Unbelievable. It was utterly bloody perfect. I wanted to do a banger rally which is why the guy gave it to me so cheap. I'm still yet to do that rally, but no longer have the car. I sold it for about £300 to a family who were clearly down on their luck who, I hope, still have the car.

      1996 Toyota Granvia by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
      1996 Toyota Granvia. N775 JEV. My wife and I decided to increase our numbers further and, with our 4th son on the way, larger transport was required. We quickly realised you can either have 4 children and no apparel, or apparel and no children. After trying a very tired Mercedes Viano, the Granvia was found for 1/4 of the price and it's still here 2 years later. I can safely say that we'll never sell it - it really is another member of the family.

      1993 Mercedes 190e by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
      1993 Mercedes 190e. L795 COJ. I've admired these cars since I was a child. In fact, one of the very few toy cars I still have from my childhood is a Mercedes 190e. Regular readers of "Memoirs from the Hard Shoulder" will know what a PITA this car has been since day 1, but I get the feeling it's a keeper. We'll see!

      1983 Ford Sierra Base 1.6 by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
      1983 Ford Sierra Base. GVG 510Y. Not explicitly my car, but it should be documented here for reference. Oh - and the V5 is in my name. The story is online for all to read as to how five of us acquired what is believed to be the only remaining Ford Sierra Base. Make a brew and read it, it's a fantastic story.

      1982 Ford Sierra L by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
      1982 Ford Sierra L. LCR 503Y. I accidentally won this on ebay for £520. Upon reflection, I shouldn't have sold it - but short stop of saying I regret it. I could never get truly comfortable driving it and, in fairness, I could scratch my Sierra itch with the base if I wanted. Sold it at a stupid profit of £1250. It is believed to be the oldest remaining Ford Sierra in the UK.

      1979 Volvo 343 DL by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
      1979 Volvo 343 DL. DBY 466T As you'll see above, I'd had a 360GLT as a younger lad and fancied one of these earlier cars. The variomatic is, frankly, terrible but amusing. This car has just 8000 miles on the clock and inside was absolutely timewarp. Sadly, the huge bill for the Mercedes 190e cylinder head rebuild meant I had to sell this car shortly after acquiring it. Since then I've had a bit of money luck, and now realise I didn't need to sell it after all. Typical.

      I think that's it. My arthritis is playing up even more now. I've left out a few cars that were actually my wife's, but if I find pictures will add them in at a later date. I'll run this as an ongoing thread on cars and what's happening.

      Current SitRep:

      Purple Avensis: Just about to click over 185,000. Minor drama this week when an HT lead split but otherwise utterly fantastic, fantastically boring and boringly reliable.

      Granvia: Just done 1000 miles in a month around Norfolk, 6 up with suitcases. 31mpg achieved on the way up which is good for an old tub with a 3.0 Turbo Diesel on board. ODO displaying 175,000 which is a mix of miles and kilometers. Say 130,000 miles for argument's sake.

      Mercedes: Being a PITA. It's had the top end completely rebuilt after the chain came off. Now needs welding to pass another MOT and the gearbox bearings are on strike. It's about to go into the garage for winter until I can stomach it again. 151,000 miles on the clock.

      Sierra bASe: Still on sabbatical with AngryDicky who only took it bloody camping in cornwall! Legend.
    • By juular
      Old car - check
      Full of rust - check
      Siezed engine - check
      Cheapest on the internet - check
      Bought sight unseen - check
      No space for it - check
      Poo count - 1.5
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