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Camper shite


Jim Bell

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We had a pop top CF for a short while. Went to Cromer in it on a wing and a prayer and my lad fell out of the roof top bunk thing straight onto his sister at 3.00am!

My missus hated it but it was about the best holiday we had.

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I like the idea of a campervan and have often thought of buying one but so far always come to my senses before doing anything stupid like buying one.

 

There was the remains of a superb one on ebay a while back; a Daimler DE36 with an unfortunately collapsed Bow-top Romany style caravan on the back., now that's the sort that would suit me (only a bit less collapsed)

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Whenever I consider the cost of campervan ownership, I calculate how many nights in a hotel this would buy me, including getting shitfaced at the bar each evening.

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What! 2 on ebay, not sold at £300????

 

Quick dash to ebay........

 

FAD! Nowt there today. I can afford that if I did creative things and squinted a bit (possibly).

 

Arsebiscuits.

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That Forward Control looks ace and would be perfect for when the zombie apocalypse happens (it will you know, it will). 

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Whenever I consider the cost of campervan ownership, I calculate how many nights in a hotel this would buy me, including getting shitfaced at the bar each evening.

 

When you look at it on purely financial terms, even a DIY conversion like mine doesn't really make sense! Taking another vehicle I could get twice the mpg, and quite a bit higher cruising speed. But for me it's the ability to find a perfect wild camping spot, and settle back with a fire and bottle of wine. Plus finding a dog friendly hotel isn't always easy/possible.

 

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or

 

travelodge-reading-central.jpg

;-)

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A campervan can be a bit more than a financial liability, before you have one they're a bit of an object of derision, peado wagon, waste of a good van, often owned by unbearable twats, caravan stigma, that kind of thing but if you try it you risk getting very attached to one. Maybe find you don't want to go anywhere without it. I've clocked up nearly 50K in 4 years, at 65MPH, with pots, pans, windows rattling, no power steering, shit seats, overall a pretty dismal driving experience but not bored yet. It's saying fuck you to zombie mecca services and stopping whenever you choose to put the kettle on that does it, that and as soon as I get my punters off my back, with very little planning I can fuck off over the channel away from the halfwit sheeple caricatures of humans that pass for a population in the Southeast. I suppose it's like a freedom groove man.

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Bought ours back in 96, I've only been on an aircraft/through an airport once since then.

 

I haven't even got a passport any more.

We take three holidays a year, the cost of camp sites has increased massively over the last few years since some twat came up with 'glamping'.

But even so, £12 a night isn't out of the way, I spend the weeks leading up to the trip stocking the bar and when I get to wherever,

I can afford to eat and drink out to my hearts content.

re Glamping - when we started, the stuck up fucks on the Caravan Club sites would look down their noses at us and tut audibly.

Now my old VW is probably worth more than most of their caravans and it's on trend/hip/fashionable too so they all have to look up to us!

49 pence per mile last year - a bargain.

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  • 10 years later...

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