Taxi Drivers Past and Present - Any Stories To Share; funny, interesting, scary etc.?

[warren t claim]

On 28/09/2024 at 23:45, Lord Sterling said:

Not driven a taxi as a profession but have driven a couple of vehicles that were at the time, working taxi cabs.

The interior of this C-Max below was one of the worst I had ever been in:

I literally barely fitted into the vehicles there was do many hanging bottles of hand sanitiser etc... this was back in 2021 just off the back of Covid. I never felt uncomfortable driving a vehicle.

I'm no grass so I'm not going to tell tales but you do know that to drive a plated vehicle on the public highway you have to either hold a taxi badge (any area) or be a VOSA approved tester?

[warren t claim]

Sexual offer of the night.

Picked three middle aged women up from the sort of pub that you wouldn't walk into for a pint if you were a stranger. They were discussing amongst themselves they should be dropped off and despite me telling them the cheapest option one lady insisted on being dropped off last despite her living the closest. This should've rung alarm bells but I really wasn't paying attention. 

First two dropped off with no issues and then it came time to double back and drop off milf number 3. Lady then starts telling me that she's had a great night out and it's a shame that she has to go home to her husband who doesn't understand her. She then decided to ask me the question of when did I think that the last time her husband had sex with her was? Oh fucking hell! Here we go! I do the decent thing and offer her a vanilla answer and she replies six months. She then asks to borrow my phone charger and I hand her the cable. She plugs her phone in and for some reason pulls it out of the USB socket. She says sorry and then crawls into the front of the Kia.

 This procedure is usually undertaken by a horny tart who's desperate to let the driver know that she's either wearing no pants or she's wearing stockings. This size 14 40 something milf managed to tick both boxes. Shes oof and feet on the dash she then starts to fire questions at me about my sex life. I reply telling her that I have a great sex life with Gavin, my civil partner! She laughs loudly before shouting "Only I could find a queer taxi driver when I'm as horny as fuck!"

In my experience, pretending to be gay is an easy way to diffuse the unwanted amorous advances of a lady passenger.

[Lord Sterling]

1 hour ago, warren t claim said:

I'm no grass so I'm not going to tell tales but you do know that to drive a plated vehicle on the public highway you have to either hold a taxi badge (any area) or be a VOSA approved tester?

To drive as a working taxi driver, yes but to move one down the road or to take it to the local tyre place, I wasn't aware. I was helping to move the vehicles to these places so no more than a mile.

[warren t claim]

1 minute ago, Lord Sterling said:

To drive as a working taxi driver, yes but to move one down the road or to take it to the local tyre place, I wasn't aware. I was helping to move the vehicles to these places so no more than a mile.

Sad but true. I know a few lads who have put their ladies through the taxi test so they can drive the family car 

[Lord Sterling]

Yeah, it won't put me off driving a mile or two to a tyre place, if I get caught, I get caught. However it unlikely to happen again seeing as I am now on the lookout for a new garage mechanic.

[Pieman]

On 28/09/2024 at 23:45, Lord Sterling said:

I literally barely fitted into the vehicles there was do many hanging bottles of hand sanitiser etc... this was back in 2021 just off the back of Covid. I never felt uncomfortable driving a vehicle.

Is that a bottle of piss in the centre console?

1 hour ago, warren t claim said:

feet on the dash

If anyone does that in my car, I tell them the story a paramedic friend once recounted to me about attending a high speed head-on crash where the teenage girl in the passenger seat had been sitting with her feet up on the dash.  She didn't have any legs any more, while her (believed to be street racing at the time) boyfriend had been killed on impact.

[warren t claim]

1 minute ago, Pieman said:

Is that a bottle of piss in the centre console?

If anyone does that in my car, I tell them the story a paramedic friend once recounted to me about attending a high speed head-on crash where the teenage girl in the passenger seat had been sitting with her feet up on the dash.  She didn't have any legs any more, while her (believed to be street racing at the time) boyfriend had been killed on impact.

You've not encountered many pissed up and horny Birkenhead slappers in your time, have you?

[Pieman]

Never been to Merseyside at all, apart from the airport once.

[warren t claim]

1 minute ago, Pieman said:

Never been to Merseyside at all, apart from the airport once.

I must show you around here someday.

[big_al_granvia]

4 hours ago, warren t claim said:

 

In my experience, pretending to be gay is an easy way to diffuse the unwanted amorous advances of a lady passenger.

seriously?? i know you have a lass but you must have the best morals of any scouse cabbie

[warren t claim]

2 minutes ago, big_al_granvia said:

seriously?? i know you have a lass but you must have the best morals of any scouse cabbie

In my experience sometimes a refusal really does offend.

[High Jetter]

8 hours ago, warren t claim said:

I'm no grass so I'm not going to tell tales but you do know that to drive a plated vehicle on the public highway you have to either hold a taxi badge (any area) or be a VOSA approved tester?

Even if not plying? Never knew that, have been guilty of it