Grogee's spannering (Maestro , Corsa & Avensis). FONDLE MY PARTNER

[grogee]

11 minutes ago, St.Jude said:

I don't know why this hasn't been asked before, but why do you have a 2 post lift in your Swedish Sauna? 

Not mine... My mates. He built a wooden garage in his garden. I will say I think it's warmer than a brick building. It looks like a ski chalet from the outside...

[grogee]

On 1/12/2022 at 5:02 PM, djoptix said:

It's Enya, and it belongs to the previous owner of the car 😉

 

Not that there's anything embarrassing about listening to Enya. 

What shall I do with it then? At the moment I'm torn between coaster and bird scarer

[grogee]

On 1/12/2022 at 4:51 PM, grogee said:

Thanks, but no. Feels more like disc thickness variation. @djoptix gave me some used discs to try which I might throw on as a test to see if it's any different. 

If that makes no difference I'll move up the suspension 'tree' and start replacing bits. I've already got my eye on some PU subframe bushes that don't look a total bastard to fit. 

Fluid looks a bit dark too so I'll get in there and bleed out the old stuff. Just generally need to get in and check everything underneath, hopefully next week. 

Another pleasant drive in the Saab this morning, although the low sun was annoying driving south. Very chilly start so I was impressed with the heated mirrors which were actually steaming as I scraped the windows. 

I noticed the climate system was 'ticking' which I think must be the sticky flaps PO was telling me about. However I discovered I could make it go away by turning the system off and on again, IT Crowd style. 

Also the MILf light is back, I haven't bothered to read the code(s) again but strongly suspect it needs a new DICk. (The ignition cassette that goes over all four plugs). Pattern ones about £120, genuine ones double. Will probably shell out for genuine because I can hear you all now saying PATTERNZ'R'SHITE M9.

Could just be cam sensor though, we'll see tomorrow if I get time to plug in the tech 2 unit. 

Either way it runs fine although I am driving it like a nun. 

[AnnoyingPentium]

1 hour ago, grogee said:

What shall I do with it then? At the moment I'm torn between coaster and bird scarer

My... errrrr... mate... (yep that'll do) will take it off your hands, depending on what album it is, of course.

[grogee]

10 hours ago, AnnoyingPentium said:

My... errrrr... mate... (yep that'll do) will take it off your hands, depending on what album it is, of course.

Its a white one. You're welcome though, pm me your address

[grogee]

New (used) Pirellis on the front, so now my car is exactly the same* as a Formula 1 car.

There was some interesting shite at my tame tyre man's unit. His main business is refurbing wheels, let me know if you need a contact (Southam area).

Apparently the Volvo brick is being restored, no idea about the E36 - which looks to be a shelf/cupboard at the moment. The LR is a bit bling for my tastes but it is tidy.

[grogee]

Fun visit to Karl (Noob tune) this morning for a software 'refresh'. He's a great guy and has given me some good pointers to get the Saab in good shape. Needless to say it accelerates with some alacrity now, 275bhp if the figures are to be believed. 

Now I just need to tame the front end a bit to make it a slightly guided missile. 

[grogee]

Rear windscreen washer: fixerated. 

Also managed to swap the filtre du haire this morning. It's one of those 'from underneath' jobs but I just jacked it up a few inches and wriggled around on the floor, managed it in the end. 

Old Crosland filter removed, new Crosland filter in place (for maximum cheapskate points).

Been ordering a few bits and bobs too. Karl noticed a broken plastic breather valve at the back of the rocker cover, TADTS. So I've ordered a metal replacement. Apparently you have to have tiny fingers to get the old one off, so let's see. 

Karl also offered some expert advice on the DICk (ignition and knock sensor cassette). Going on the fault codes the MILf light is on because the DICk is failing. Which I suspected but nice to have it confirmed. 

A new one is £250. Lesser engines than the HOT can make do with pattern but the HOT is fussy. I've found a second hand genuine one for £80, hopefully has some life left in it. At least it's easy to fit. 

Also been at my rich friend's house helping him move cars around. Have a Series 3 warming up on a January morning. 

[AnnoyingPentium]

On 1/15/2022 at 11:30 AM, grogee said:

275bhp if the figures are to be believed. 

Rapid battleship.

[grogee]

51 minutes ago, AnnoyingPentium said:

Rapid battleship.

I'm hoping to impress* the family this afternoon when we drive to MIL's house. 

Mrs Grogee: "Stoppit! Stop being a knob and slow down! It's dangerous"

Yeah but it's also fun

[AnnoyingPentium]

51 minutes ago, grogee said:

Mrs Grogee: "Stoppit! Stop being a knob and slow down! It's dangerous"

Yeah but it's also fun

The former Ms. Pentium also did not enjoy the sixty-four horses of the Fabia.

[grogee]

1 hour ago, AnnoyingPentium said:

The former Ms. Pentium also did not enjoy the sixty-four horses of the Fabia.

Apparently I was "showing off" and "being a bit aggressive".

I overtook one car when it was safe to do so. 

[AnnoyingPentium]

9 minutes ago, grogee said:

Apparently I was "showing off" and "being a bit aggressive".

I overtook one car when it was safe to do so. 

[grogee]

More twatting about, this time in the cabin to do the filter. I will say the glovebox and trim removal process is nice and logical. 

Not the worst I've seen - not original (the old one was 'Nordic' brand) and only a small amount of tree came out with it. 

Pleased to see the super cheap QH brand filter I bought was plastic framed not cardboard. 

Both old and new look to be the 'charcoal' type that supposedly suck up nasty odours. I'm pleased to report the Saab has none of this, apart from whatever its new owner is introducing. 

While I was in there I had a fiddle with HVAC links and joints in case they were sticky, though nothing appears amiss. 

[grogee]

Not much to report on the Saab today. This morning I went for a glorious winter sunshine drive to a garage to drop off some knackered tyres in return for £20 for their kitty. 

I had a play with manual mode, which is as good as the slushy Aisin-Warner box will allow. Shifts are fairly unhurried but they do happen eventually, you just have to plan ahead. 

More fun is Sport mode, which sharpens up the throttle map, hangs onto gears longer and kicks down quicker. It is indecently quick especially with the new map from Karl at Noobtune. Fun to just blast past anyone daring to dawdle, but I restrained myself thinking I was tempting the Hidden Speed Camera Van.

Later on I pulled the dash trim out (screws AND clips if you please) to try and find the mythical phone interface. Sure enough it's behind the radio but well hidden. I've plugged in the interface lead but that'll do for now until I can dig out the old Parrot Bluetooth kit and fart around with the wiring. 

I also need to get around to sorting out the roof antenna which is broken, and its innards are on show. Luckily not leaking but I'm procrastinating a bit as it will involve C- and D- pillar trim removal before I can drop headlining and get at antenna fixing. 

[grogee]

Fuel filter changed today, shitty job although at least it came off without a fight. 

Tried to cure the 'Theft Protection Warning' message by removing the alarm siren. However, by the time I'd wrestled the wheelarch liner off, I discovered someone's already taken it out. 

Some slight crustiness discovered behind the liner so I wire wheeled it back and slapped on some zinc primer. It really isn't that bad, maybe they are galvanized?

Then a little fettling and bodging to give the liner some more support as three of its fixings were MIA. Drilled a hole and put in a plastic rivet/push-pin thing.

Previous to the filter I was looking for the fuel pump fuse to run the pressure out of the system, and found the anti-theft fuse. Pulled that and hey presto, no warning message any more. (In conjunction with Tech-2 fiddling to change the settings).

Now it's up on stands and I've drained the first four litres of ATF out of the box and put four fresh cherry red litres back in. Next step is to run the rest out 2 litres at a time with the engine running, with thanks to @Wgl2019 for the tube to help with this. 

There is some* grot at the back of the car on the chassis rails so I'm hoping to get the grinder+knotted brush wheel thing on there to get back to good metal, then slap a load of Product on top. 

I'm also hoping to change at least one of the level sensors that sort out the Xenons, so I've dosed it in WD40 in the hope the fixings might actually unscrew rather than break. 

[paulplom]

I had a '56 saab 95 two years ago. The one in my profile picture as it happens. There was zero rust on that and the black paint shone up really well.

I've always fancied a puma but they were too expensive when newish or when affordable too rusty. They reckon they're a great drivers car.

[grogee]

16 minutes ago, paulplom said:

I had a '56 saab 95 two years ago. The one in my profile picture as it happens. There was zero rust on that and the black paint shone up really well.

I've always fancied a puma but they were too expensive when newish or when affordable too rusty. They reckon they're a great drivers car.

I'm pretty impressed so far. It's got a few issues as most 17 year old cars have, but given its complexity it's amazing how much still works. I'm enjoying slowly getting it back to 'the best it can be'.

My Puma is in hibernation until the salt gets off the road but yes it's a fun car. Not fast by modern (or Saab) standards but very chuckable. 

It's pretty much 'done' in project terms now, the only thing on the list this year is service and cam belt. And clutch if I can be arsed, although it's not slipping. 

[KitKat]

13 hours ago, grogee said:

It's pretty much 'done' in project terms now, the only thing on the list this year is service and cam belt. And clutch if I can be arsed, although it's not slipping. 

Just out of interest, are you tackling the cambelt yourself? 

[grogee]

3 hours ago, KitKat said:

Just out of interest, are you tackling the cambelt yourself? 

Yes but I need to borrow some tools

[grogee]

Rear level sensor fitted, it came off without broken bolts which is nice. It's fairly crudely bolted to the rear suspension arm so it's exposed to all sorts of shite. Still waiting for the front one to arrive and (assuming it's not a wiring problem) then I can 'calibrate' the space-shuttle Xenons. 

I do need to investigate the headlamp washers further, I've changed a broken fuse but still no evidence they're firing. Trouble is they're 'intelligent' so only work with the windscreen washers every fifth or sixth go, and only after a certain mileage/time. I couldn't see an option in Tech-2 to manually operate them. 

ATF fluid flushed and changed, massive thanks attack to @Wgl2019 for his satisfying pipe and @Cluffy for being the glamorous assistant operating the engine on/off.

Need to go for a quick run soon so I'm wondering if I'll feel any difference - very dubious of those that say a fluid change 'transforms' their auto box, though to be fair mine didn't seem to be doing anything wrong before the change. 

The old fluid was pretty dark and nasty though so probably original. Not terrible for 120k miles. 

[Wgl2019]

I didn't find a massive difference immediately after changing the ATF however over the next few thousand miles it became a bit smoother and an annoying clunk disappeared. I wondered if the new fluid slowly helped clean a bit of gunk or varnish off of something?

I got to change most of the fluid again about 18 months later when the cooler pipe rusted through so is still like cherryade in there!

[grogee]

Interestingly I can definitely detect a smoother 1st to 2nd shift, so I'll eat my words regarding fluid change magic. 

However it's now picked up a misfire and it's idling rough. I was fiddling with a breather pipe that I'm trying to change but I need the tool to press the release tabs. I've ordered it but it's not arrived. Anyway I think there's probably an air leak because the existing breather is properly broken. 

I do have some new plugs to throw in which I might do this afternoon. And I took the plunge on a new DICk unit, genuine Saab is £250, ouch.

Also I'm running it on 95 unleaded which is verboten apparently. Karl from Noobtune says Tesco 99 or Shell Wallet-Buster only. 

[grogee]

Just been to the chip shop, soz no pics. But having connected put the broken ends of the breather next to each other, it's now running fine again. I think that proves my air leak theory. 

I think there must be a slight vacuum in the pipe which means it sort of 'sucks' itself together just enough to not cause problems. 

Anyway I can put the new breather pipe and valve on when this tool arrives. 

[grogee]

Managed to clean Mrs Grogee's Alfa and my Saab today. Alfa was absolutely filthy like every other car on the road. 

Round these parts, we have the perfect storm of enduring damp, HS2 muddy traffic and salty residue. It's not been warm enough to dry it out and it just slathers every single car. 

Anyway I managed to get them both clean and then filled with enthusiasm I tackled the chocolate melted into the carpet, presumably a gift from @djoptix Junior. I'm borrowing @Cluffy's steam cleaner and this was enough to shift the grot away. Same tactic on the grubby boot carpet. 

It's not perfect and never will be but it's now a pleasant place to spend time with a minimum of bacterial hazards. 

I even topped up the space saver spare from 20 to 60 psi so it might actually stand a chance of getting me home if I get a flat. 

In the back it has heated seats (!) but one of the buttons was missing. I took out the rear console panel to replace it only to find there isn't a harness/connector for a second switch so I guess the 'hole' must have had a blanking plate. So there's now a 'dumb' switch in there but it's symmetrical so doesn't bother my OCD.

If I get time between pretending to work tomorrow I may flush the brake fluid out as it looks pretty dark. 

No pics as I couldn't be arsed, but I did find some Brembo front discs for a very reasonable £67.

[djoptix]

This is excellent, you're doing all the stuff I should have done, it was clearly the right decision to sell it to you. Don't forget I have first refusal when you sell it

The front level sensor had a new linkage for the last MOT so that should come off the sensor easily enough.

[grogee]

9 hours ago, djoptix said:

This is excellent, you're doing all the stuff I should have done, it was clearly the right decision to sell it to you. Don't forget I have first refusal when you sell it

The front level sensor had a new linkage for the last MOT so that should come off the sensor easily enough.

Ha! Seller's regret - how very Autoshite. Yes you are first in queue should I sell it, but I worked out I've spent more than purchase price on bits already! New DICk, remap, auto fluid, service bits, level sensor, tyres etc etc. Anyway it's a lovely thing and I think/hope I'll be keeping it a while. 

Only reason I might sell is if my job requires me to drive a lot, but on paper it's 4 days WFH and one in office 30 miles away so I'm hoping this is the right vehicle. 

The Puma will come out in the spring though so the mileage probably won't be getting that high on the Saab. 

Thanks again for selling, it really is a lovely thing

[Cento16v]

Did you get the SID2 or whatever its called enabled by Karl so you can see a load of values on the info display like misfire per cylinder, boost values etcs?

[grogee]

3 hours ago, Cento16v said:

Did you get the SID2 or whatever its called enabled by Karl so you can see a load of values on the info display like misfire per cylinder, boost values etcs?

Yes. It was registering misfires quite heavily but now isn't after my temporary 'fix'.

[grogee]

Today I are mostly been learning to clay, I've a feeling it's a bit too cold though. 

Also took headlamps out for a polish with Arm & Hammer baking soda toothpaste. Smear of paste on lens, then wet foam pad on drill to smush it in and polish. Sponge off with water and repeat. Finished off with some Megiuars (sp?) headlamp polish. Pics below show one done and one not done.