WTF were they thinking.........

[Rocket88]

Why is it that some [ok, all] motor manufacturers seem to wilfully design cars with glaringly obvious design flaws......here's a couple of examples..Cam belt change on some Audi 5 pots involves removing just about everything from the front bumper backwards.Headlamp bulb change on a Rover 75.

[Inspector Morose]

Same in the bus industry too.Metrobus head gasket? Nah, remove the engine first.Leyland National Kingpins? First cut large hole in wheelarch above so you can get a long enough drift in to sledge them out 'cause they 'aint moving otherwise.National (Mk1) valve replacement? First remove crank and pistons (No separate head you see!)I believe all designer of things mechanical are of the thought either a) All minor parts last for ever. Or the part will last long enough in the car till it becomes obsolete and replaced by the next new shiny thing they design.

[Station]

Why does Vauxhall 'Flame Red' turn into 'Flame Pink', or in the case of this unfortunate/lazy individual, 'Flame White'.

 

 

Headlight bulb difficulty is no excuse, I think that type of thing would put me off buying a car. My dad's Brava, you cannot get to the bulb.

 

Also, using torx or allen bolts on areas on the outside of the car. Just use bolts, you can always take them off and never have to drill the buggers out.

[Cavcraft]

Tell you what Station faced with that or 'lacquer peel blue' on the Mk2 Astras I'd have the red everytime!

[trigger]

The FIL has just bought a Peugeot 307 1.6 HDI SW and was showing me around it yesterday, He asked me where the air filter would be as he couldn't find it, "under this piece of plastic trim here at the end of the air pipe i reckon" i said, Took it off, It was just a empty void behind the headlight.In the end after looking on google and finding a video on youtube it turns out it's right behind the engine and the only way of getting to it is to take half the car to bits by removing all the shuttle and trim under the windscreen.What a wanky design!

[saabhappy]

I watched Edd China trying to change the alternator on a Delta Integrale and was amazed at how difficult it was. Wheeler Dealers did a Ferrari Dino recently and repairing/replacing the manifold was even worse than the Integrale's alternator!

[Alexg]

In the late 90s the Vauxhall Omega was facelifted and fitted with a new interior and on some models a dash mounted CD changer. Huge improvement, except on the Auto model. When ejecting the CD magazine from the dash in Park, the magazine would pop out and fowl the Auto stick. It would be stuck and you have to move the shifter into drive to remove it

[ashmicro]

Anything to do with the bastard Scenic II, headlamp bulbs included.

[Pete-M]

The Mk4 Golf headlamp bulb is the one that kills me.Removing the front end of an Audi only takes 40 mins or so, I'd rather do that and have easy access to the cambelt than do the same job on something like a Fiat Coupé 20v where you need triple jointed fingers and still have to remove the bloody engine to do the belt...

[seth]

Why does Vauxhall 'Flame Red' turn into 'Pogweasel Pink', or in the case of this unfortunate/lazy individual, 'Flame White'.

[j-j]

Vectra Mk1 Headlight bulb as well!!! I have personal experience of this madness after foolishly going to someone's aid in a filling station once..Xantia 16v timing belt tensioner.Access was ok for the belt itself it was the usual fair but OMG! was the tensioner thing a cnut to do - you need a breaker bar engaged in the handy square socket in the tensioner that's fine but you can't physically do this AND fit the belt at the same time (there's no 'lock' on the tensioner - it needs to be held from below but the only access to tighten it again is from above) so it's a 2 man job.Anything 'service' that's a 2 man job is fokkin stupid IMO.Audi A4(?think?) I asked about this on another thread - doesn't it have a similar fault on the interior much akin to the Omega Auto thing above? Something like you can't shift gear with the cup holder out (or something like that?) was mentioned on the Top Gear when they were going across London at night or something and May was in this fit girl's A4 where she 'reported' the issue.Old cars have dumb things too: IIRC if you want the fuel tank out a P100 (for whatever reason) you need to lift the body off the chassis!And on the Cit GSA, to change to 2 timing belts you need to remove the lights, grill, undertray, front slam panel/crossmember, fan and fan cowling! The same stuff has to come off to do the oil pump (external) seal, the hydraulic pump gaiter and any work to the 2 exhaust manifolds! So if you're doing one of these, you tend to want to do all of these in one go.Luckily, getting all that stuff off takes only about an hour. The cambelts themselves are among the easiest I've ever done though (once you get to them)

[j-j]

Audi A4(?think?) I asked about this on another thread - doesn't it have a similar fault on the interior much akin to the Omega Auto thing above? Something like you can't shift gear with the cup holder out (or something like that?) was mentioned on the Top Gear when they were going across London at night or something and May was in this fit girl's A4 where she 'reported' the issue.

EDIT** just checked on the other thread - it was the A2: can't pull the handbrake with the arm rest down!! What were they (not)thinking indeed?!

[mnde]

And on the Cit GSA, to change to 2 timing belts you need to remove the lights, grill, undertray, front slam panel/crossmember, fan and fan cowling! The same stuff has to come off to do the oil pump (external) seal, the hydraulic pump gaiter and any work to the 2 exhaust manifolds! So if you're doing one of these, you tend to want to do all of these in one go.Luckily, getting all that stuff off takes only about an hour. The cambelts themselves are among the easiest I've ever done though (once you get to them)

You forgot about the breaker bar on the fan dog nut, and the ?42mm socket you need. Someone said they've used a rattle gun on them though.And what about the clutch being an engine-out job? Many jobs on the GS are of the knuckle scraping variety. My favourites are changing the deeply recessed spark plugs without an extension bar (ouch), and changing the alternator. Which in my case was a two man job - one of us heaving on the top of the slam panel while the other twisted the alternator through different angles until it fitted through the gap... then I lost the securing nut down the front of the engine (god knows where it went), and had to liberate another from a scrapper.... and then feeding the alternator belt through the fan blades. I know someone who's taken a grinder to the slam panel and cut a rectangle out, drilled a couple of holes in it and done something like fit it back in place using wingnuts and washers - voila, instant access to the alternator! My other favourite (not) is changing the front brake pads (inboard) which involves removing the heater unit and gaining awful backache and bruised stomach while leaning over the whole engine. I hear adjusting handbrake pads and doing the valve clearances with a cranked screwdriver and a mirror - are also arseaches.Mark.

[pogweasel]

Why does Vauxhall 'Flame Red' turn into 'Pogweasel Pink', or in the case of this unfortunate/lazy individual, 'Flame White'.

[Station]

Vectra mk1 steering rack. Difficult to unbolt, steering shaft is attached via a chocolate torx bolt. Rack bolts require many joints in the arms and fingers. Then you realise the engine subframe is bolted ON TOP of the steering rack mounts. You have to lift the engine out. :xWhat is Pogweasal Pink by the way?

[Polystratus]

The FIL has just bought a Peugeot 307 1.6 HDI SW and was showing me around it yesterday, He asked me where the air filter would be as he couldn't find it, "under this piece of plastic trim here at the end of the air pipe i reckon" i said, Took it off, It was just a empty void behind the headlight.In the end after looking on google and finding a video on youtube it turns out it's right behind the engine and the only way of getting to it is to take half the car to bits by removing all the shuttle and trim under the windscreen.What a wanky design!

Just wonder sometimes if that's a ploy by the manufacturer to make simple service jobs longer so a job that in the past thats only takes a few minutes, now takes four hours to do, so can screw you more on the hourly labour rate if its done by a main dealer. Certain modern Japanese/Korean car engine bays look very cramped up, there was one I was looking at, and the drive belt is rammed right up the side of the engine bay wall - you need a hand and tools thin as a credit card to get to it, looked like you need to take the entire engine out just to change it.

[j-j]

And on the Cit GSA, to change to 2 timing belts you need to remove the lights, grill, undertray, front slam panel/crossmember, fan and fan cowling! The same stuff has to come off to do the oil pump (external) seal, the hydraulic pump gaiter and any work to the 2 exhaust manifolds! So if you're doing one of these, you tend to want to do all of these in one go.Luckily, getting all that stuff off takes only about an hour. The cambelts themselves are among the easiest I've ever done though (once you get to them)

You forgot about the breaker bar on the fan dog nut, and the ?42mm socket you need. Someone said they've used a rattle gun on them though.And what about the clutch being an engine-out job? Many jobs on the GS are of the knuckle scraping variety. My favourites are changing the deeply recessed spark plugs without an extension bar (ouch), and changing the alternator. Which in my case was a two man job - one of us heaving on the top of the slam panel while the other twisted the alternator through different angles until it fitted through the gap... then I lost the securing nut down the front of the engine (god knows where it went), and had to liberate another from a scrapper.... and then feeding the alternator belt through the fan blades. I know someone who's taken a grinder to the slam panel and cut a rectangle out, drilled a couple of holes in it and done something like fit it back in place using wingnuts and washers - voila, instant access to the alternator! My other favourite (not) is changing the front brake pads (inboard) which involves removing the heater unit and gaining awful backache and bruised stomach while leaning over the whole engine. I hear adjusting handbrake pads and doing the valve clearances with a cranked screwdriver and a mirror - are also arseaches.Mark.

^truth^ I didn't mention the other stuff coz I didn't want to paint the G in too bad a light Never did the clutch on mine but I did do the brake pads at the front - must say I actually found these quite easy! The problem I had was that the new pads supplied had a backing plate that seemed too big for the caliper and I had the get all four pads in a vice and grind them all down about 3mm! Then they slotted in nicely. My G for one of the late ones and had the 'easy' hand brake adjusters that the early ones omitted - no need for a mirror - just a little torch to check the contact.I still have the huge fan nut socket in my tool collection just in case I find another G one day (highly unlikely )Valve clearances! yes, I also adjusted these on the G while all the front end stuff was removed - opportunity knocks and all that.. -just recalled: G series oil filter is one of those genius ones oriented upwards so that it's nigh on impossible to remove without covering the engine and gearbox (and probably the clutch) in oil, come to think of it, you need to remove the driveshafts to get the front disks off and you need to remove the rear hubs to get the rear disks off!! Easy stuff on the GS: removable front wings, only 3 wheel studs, front suspension corrector is just under the wheelarch cover, nice handbrake cable access!

What is Pogweasal Pink by the way?

- I'm guessing pogweasel bought a red car that went VERY pink a la the Vauxhall?

[Guest]

^truth^ I didn't mention the other stuff coz I didn't want to paint the G in too bad a light

You'd have to go WAY further than that to stop me wanting a GS. I have wanted one for a very very long time - an early 1015 Break in orange would suit me fine.

[Pete-M]

Diesel engines in cars. Arrgh. I so wish they'd never bothered.

[shite_meister]

What is Pogweasal Pink by the way?

It is a sexual move involving Pogweasel, some Molyslip and an anus

[Milford Cubicle]

To piss tailgaters off.

 

in featured videos demonstrates diesel's sooty goodness much better.

[Station]

Was expecting a lot more there.

[CIH]

Just about any job on any car made after 2001 is an utter bitch. I really hate modern cars. Try changing a battery on a modern Rangie. It's fucking huge, will probably have no handle so you're lifting it with fingertips and it's in a box under the windscreen so you're lifting it with fingertips being grazed by sharp-ass scuttle trim.One of the newer Renault Espace, with the V6, it's an engine out job to do the sparkies. What kinda of crazy mentality signed-off on that ??

[Parky]

According to a workmate it costs £45 to change the headlight bulbs on a new Beetle as the Bumper has to come off. Cant be right surely?

[Mr Lobster]

^ Wouldn't suprise me at all. Certainly the bumper has to come off on a few new cars to change the headlight bulbs.

[peter9000uk]

According to a workmate it costs £45 to change the headlight bulbs on a new Beetle as the Bumper has to come off. Cant be right surely?

Err No, theyareactually one of the better ones. You undo a screw under the bonnet and the headlight pops out, change bulb and replace

[woolleyiain]

According to a workmate it costs £45 to change the headlight bulbs on a new Beetle as the Bumper has to come off. Cant be right surely?

Err No, theyareactually one of the better ones. You undo a screw under the bonnet and the headlight pops out, change bulb and replace

Yup. We charge $53.00 + tax for that. The bulb costs $3.50....

[woolleyiain]

VW Touareg - the battery is under the left front seat. So if you need to change it, the seat comes out. They're heavy things, Touareg seats.....

[Rocket88]

I find it hilarious that you have to have a spare bulb kit "sur le continent". Your chances of changing a headlight bulb on most modern stuff without tools, a well light garage, and the dexterity of Houdini are nil. What chance would some poor old lady have, in the dark, chucking it down, and parked on hard shoulder have?

[Split_Pin]

I have to say that my Astra is fairly easy to work on - I haven't found anything (Yet) thats a wanky design.I've had no problems changing the headlight bulbs on my Vectra either, but the job of changing the alternator belt, which is 15 mins on the Astra, involves unbolting and jacking up the o/s of the engine!! Also, for most interconnected suspension components, such as the anti-roll bar and steering rack, you have to drop the subframe.I also believe that on most French cars after about 1998 or so you have to remove most of the front just to change a bulb!!Thankfully this only got to the prototype stage but the 2CV was originally fitted with suspension arms made of magnesium, which would be interesting should the car ever catch fire.