The grumpy thread

[outlaw118]

Del Boy's vehicle was a RELIANT REGAL!!!!!!! If you want to be pedantic a "Supervan iv" (i think).SWMBO thinks I'm a sad old grumpy fecker, which I probably am, but I knew all on here would understand.ITS NOT A ROBIN RELIANT YOU STUPID TWATS!!!! YOU DONT SAY "I DRIVE A MONDEO FORD" DO YOU????Thanks, I feel better now.....

[55bloke]

Well said, sir!!

[Richard]

The Lambrettas sang about a Cortina Ford, but that was just to make it rhyme.I get quite irate about things like that too. That Golf advert with the fake GTi used to piss me right off, as did Ashes to Ashes.

[Ross_K]

All those 'Trotters Independent Trading' should be toasted with a flamethrower. What kind of sad twunts are buying them all up???

 

http://www.carzone.ie/used-cars/Reliant ... n/1145048/

 

http://www.carzone.ie/used-cars/Reliant ... r/1155215/

 

Just a couple of the selection on sale over here. :roll:

 

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Misc. unrelated Reliant stuff:

 

How shite would it be to go on your holidays in this heap of shit?

 

http://tinyurl.com/6dl842

 

 

You must be shitting me, a Robin on an X reg???

http://tinyurl.com/5lk4jh

[Richard]

In the late 1990s yet another person (possibly a former Jaguar director?) had a go at resurrecting Reliant. He started calling the car a Robin again because he said that's what most people still thought it was called. From what I remember the Robin of that era had electric windows and cost £10k

[Split_Pin]

I'd love to go camping in that Reliant, beats a tent any day!IIRC X-reg is the latest a Robin goes up to. Notice that the body from the scuttle back is almost identical to the original 70's one.I think 'Robin' seems to have become a generic term for the 3-wheeles car,a bit like Hoovers.

[vicsmith]

There`s yet another "Trotters" Robin in Cleckheaton, often parked outside the unusually named "Pizza Outlet", perhaps it is some kind of zany delivery vehicle? or then again, perhaps it isn`t.It would be quite funny if they got some other details wrong with these replicas as well, like putting "Rodder`s independant Trading co." on the side, and "Perfick" on the door, or quotes from "A bit of a do" or "The Piglet files" perhaps.

[Guest]

Some pics are required of the Cleck-based Trottervan, from what I remember it's the wrong model at least. I can't wait for some drunken ASBO-riddled youths to send it hurtling down the road on its roof, preferably with its ham-armed owner bouncing around inside.

 

I wonder what it is about OFAH fans? You'll never see someone try to replicate the Cortina used on..... (extensive Google session) .....No Place Like Home.

 

Starring Charles Bronson (upper left), Macaulay Culkin (bottom left) and The Chief from "Sabotage" (bottom right).

[outlaw118]

Charles Bronson!!!!! I did have a Cortina like Onslow's out of keeping up appearances!! Wifey REALLY likes being called Hyacinth btw.... It has to be said, I look more like Onslow than I'd like.....

[r.welfare]

Dear me, Hirst...No Place Like Home is OK, but it's no "Fresh Fields" or "Home To Roost", now is it? Must try harder.

[AnthonyG]

'No place like home' - that's what that was called! - I used to fancy the teenage daughters (I was about 9 at the time).If I remember correctly the Cortina Mk4 was replaced by a Cavalier Mk2..or possibly a Montego.Also Charles Bronson and his neighbour used to hide from their respective wives & children in the garden shed, drinking cooking sherry, and the son (with the moustache) was always trying to sell the 1981 equivalent of autoshite - Heralds, Midgets etc.

[Guest]

If we're going to move onto dreary sitcoms (like NPLH), here's something only the Autoshite crew will be able to answer (as it isn't on IMCDB and I can't remember myself):"Bread" featured a character who owned a thoroughly square van with a rainbow painted on the side - what sort of van was it?

[michiel]

So far, I only found this: Jack - a dealer in anything that would fit into the battered van he drove

[Mash]

Here's my rant: Superfluous signage and labelling really gets my goat for some reason.For example I was driving into a village which had those painted or coloured tarmac strips across the road to let you know you’re coming to a 30mph zone. Well for a start I don’t need the strips cos I can see the bloody great 30 sign on its fluorescent background. What annoyed me most though were the signs telling me there were rumble strips on the road. How dozy do you have to be to need all this information?Another thing that peeves me is “Serving Suggestionâ€Â. I have a salad cream bottle which has a photo of some salad cream on a tomato and some lettuce on the label. Why does it say “Serving Suggestionâ€Â? I know that’s not the only way you are allowed to use it and I know that the tomatoes and lettuce don’t come with it.Or the Mr Kipling buns where one is cut in half on a plate. “Serving Suggestionâ€Â. F**k me – I know they’re all going to be intact in the pack. Are there people out there that need this kind of guidance??

[mouseflakes]

Are there people out there that need this kind of guidance??

Probably not - but there are people who are t*ght-arsed enough to see the chance to claim a refund because the salad cream they bought did not contain a tomato and a lettuce leaf as the illustration on the label had lead them to believe it would.I agree it's laffable - but my guess is that this is the manufacturers protecting themselves from money-grabbing time wasters.

[r.welfare]

"Baby On Board" signs.Apparently these are to alert the emergency services of your cargo if you are involved in an accident. But - given that they fall off at the slightest provocation, are usually sited somewhere in the rear window so that visibility is restricted, and the driver of said vehicle is generally not in full control due to mobile phone/fag/lots of "sunshades" on all other windows/not being able to see over steering wheel - having one of these is not going to stop me crashing into you; only my driving defensively and giving you a wide berth is.Needless to say, our cars do not have one of these signs in them

[mouseflakes]

Don't know if this belongs in this thread or one of the myriad 'ebay/ebay users are knob' threads.Why do some folk selling a car that's fit for scrap seem to think that the fact the original spare tyre is present and unused somehow makes it more valuable/desirable???And another thing ( ) - why does someone selling a car that will appeal to (at most) two dozen buyers of obscure tat feel they need to copy and paste a long description of the model and its history into the listing? If you're looking to buy a Renault 16 you probably have some idea as to what one is! I know it was 'one of the first family hatchbacks' - just tell me if the rear suspension is still attached!

[Ratdat]

If we're going to move onto dreary sitcoms (like NPLH), here's something only the Autoshite crew will be able to answer (as it isn't on IMCDB and I can't remember myself):"Bread" featured a character who owned a thoroughly square van with a rainbow painted on the side - what sort of van was it?

It was a Mk1 Transit...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weto0T8_txg

[Ross_K]

Why do some folk selling a car that's fit for scrap seem to think that the fact the original spare tyre is present and unused somehow makes it more valuable/desirable???

Ha ha. Yeah, like some cracked and wizened 18-year-old Michelin MXT with the factory sticker still on is going to be much use to you when you actually need it.

[55bloke]

On the subject of annoying sinage- what about those bloody solar or wind powered jobs that light up as you approach, warning you to SLOW DOWN!! I want one for the car which lights up with f**k off!

[Milford Cubicle]

Those solar powered signs are very expensive, what's wrong with an old reflective sign eh?

[Volksy]

According to a certain BBC TV car show, those solar/wind powered signs have to be supplimented with a normal refective sign incase they don't get enough wind/sun....So what is the point of them in the first place!

[55bloke]

Those solar powered signs are very expensive, what's wrong with an old reflective sign eh?

Because they only light up when you're going too fast, so gives a lovely feeling of smuggness to those who pass by without lighting them up! And they can snigger at the bad man speeding!

[Spottedlaurel]

I have actually a kept a couple of unused spare wheels off cars that I’ve broken. Maybe one day someone will want them for a concours resto, and their spare has already been used? Also handy as they show what tyres the cars originally came with and how the wheels were painted.

 

In the meantime they can clutter up my garage along with all the other bits that might just come in useful one day.

 

On the use of vans in Liverpudlian sitcoms, I remember a dark blue CF in The Liver Birds.

 

Thinking on, didn’t Terry have a Princess in Terry & June, and the posh lover in Butterflies have chauffeur-driven Granadas? Mk1 then Mk2 IIRC, in green? I have to admit I’m struggling though when moving down to the likes of Me and My Girl, Never The Twain, That’s My Boy and Three up, Two Down.

[r.welfare]

Never The Twain - now you're talking!I believe, from memory, Donald Sinden had the (predictable) Volvo 260 estate, while Windsor Davies had a Mk2 Granada estate.

[outlaw118]

Serving suggestions..... what shall I do with this tin of tuna? Shove it up my arse?I know, I'll look at the tin.......FFS!!!!!

[vicsmith]

Never The Twain - now you're talking!I believe, from memory, Donald Sinden had the (predictable) Volvo 260 estate, while Windsor Davies had a Mk2 Granada estate.

Yes, right up until one of them, as a result of a hilarious mix-up of some sort, had his car accidentally crushed in a scrapyard, at which point it turned out that he had in fact owned a very rusty old Maxi all along, apparently.

[garycox]

I LOLed considerably at the serving suggestioons, my particular favourites are when the product is shown on a spoon, or just suspended in mid air...PS the Reliant van was a Supervan III wasn't it?

[outlaw118]

I'll add this one to this thread, although it's been mentioned elsewhere before.......EBAY TWATS!!!!!1) People without a basic grasp of spelling and grammar listing their crap on there, obviously not realising that their inability to spell (or use the spellchecker) will instantly put some people off?! Mongs!2) Stupid people asking stupid questions. Read the feckin' listing before you ask me!!!!Theres loads more but I'm getting too angry just thinking about it, and I need to go to work.....feel free to add your own!!

[Milford Cubicle]

Selfish drivers who wait until they're practically past you before dipping their headlights.