Vodka on Saturday resulting in car purchase and collection on Sunday morning

[Peter C]

My BIL is in need of a second car. A session of alcoholic drinks and a lengthy exchange of messages with a stranger from Coventry last night resulted in plans to inspect the vehicle this morning with a view to purchase.

We can’t compete with the effort put into a recent Citroen collection but the desired car is not exactly around the corner.

We’re due to set off at approx 8:30am but I’ve been up since 6:30am, enjoying a brew.

Hitherto my poo count is zero but that is about to change.

[Peter C]

Poo count now adjusted.

Breakfast done.

Oh no! Our SUVs are frozen. Now what?

[gadgetgricey]

Keeping it vague, so as not to spoil the surprise\reveal. Matt's car?

If it is, it looks really nice.

[Peter C]

9 minutes ago, gadgetgricey said:

Matt's car?

If it is, it looks really nice.

Nope.

[Peter C]

Transportation for the day discovered.

 

[Peter C]

Have a clue.

[garethj]

It’s a white car?

Good luck and watch out for the ice on small roads!

[spartacus]

Some kind of BMW estate? E39.

[beko1987]

Chod speed! I'm awake in thame if you need an emergency stop! 

[The Moog]

Hotdogs.... For breakfast ?

Either you are hard as nails or need to find a nice local butcher for some proper sausages.

[Peter C]

Inspection in progress.

 

[Isaac Hunt]

1 hour ago, Peter C said:

Nope.

Volvo estate with recently rebuilt engine ?

[motorpunk]

E39 on Sport wheels! 
 

 

[Peter C]

Multiple problems detected.

[Peter C]

Test drive is on.

[Peter C]

1 hour ago, snagglepuss said:

Hotdogs.... For breakfast ?

Either you are hard as nails or need to find a nice local butcher for some proper sausages.

Frankfurters from our local Polish deli.

[garethj]

What are the multiple problems?

[Peter C]

And so it goes on...

[HMC]

That pillar kink in the teaser shot could only be a BMW. 

E39 with problems? If we are playing bingo with my previous ones it will be tired cooling system, worn bushes and (528 so I recon SLS) rear Suspension. I could write a book on how not to buy one x3.

[hairnet]

problems?

its a bmw

its a bmw

its a bmw 

(Sorry)

[Isaac Hunt]

43 minutes ago, Peter C said:

Multiple problems detected.

Handbook with FMDSH, you'll be fine

[martc]

6 minutes ago, hairnet said:

problems?

 

Moving a stalk on the steering column causes the decorative orange plastic pieces on all 4 corners to mysteriously glow on and off.

The above seems to coincide with a strange ticking noise audible from within the cabin. Mysterious green arrows on dashboard flash on and off in time with the ticking.

Seller - 'it's never done that before M8'

[hairnet]

e39 too old for that

[Isaac Hunt]

18 minutes ago, martc said:

Moving a stalk on the steering column causes the decorative orange plastic pieces on all 4 corners to mysteriously glow on and off.

The above seems to coincide with a strange ticking noise audible from within the cabin. Mysterious green arrows on dashboard flash on and off in time with the ticking.

Seller - 'it's never done that before M8'

It's a BMW, the indicators have never been used.  The seller is probably being honest, he will never have used them 'cos BMW driver'

[Mr_Bo11ox]

All very original* these BMW indicator gags

[Cavcraft]

Fair play, those wheels look boss.

[HMC]

It’s also a “shadow line” either by factory or by subsequent owner; chrome is satin black

[cort16]

A e39 528i estate on m parallels is worth overlooking many issues.

[Steviemillar]

I must be the only person on the world that hates E39s with a passion and I’m an obsessive BMW licker too......

Dont do it, you’ll thank me later 

[Peter C]

We were not expecting perfection from an £800 158k mile 20 year old BMW and minor cosmetic issues were not taken into consideration, however last night’s long exchange of messages with the seller suggested that the car was in good mechanical condition.

 The bodywork was actually very good with only slight corrosion noted to the ends of the offside sill. The interior was immaculate. The driver’s seat showed no wear and all the toys worked.

 The issues were:

Rear tyres were bald to the point that they were illegal.

 The handbrake was knackered.

At least two significant coolant leaks, one from the radiator pipes and another from the thermostat housing. The leaks were so bad that the car would probably not make the 84 mile journey home.

The engine was covered in oil to the point that post test drive there were numerous drips, which increased the depth and diameter of the pools of oil sitting on the top of the undertray.

But the main concern was the oil filler and underside of the cam cover, both of which had a thick coating of mayo. The dipstick, which confirmed a low oil level was also covered in a creamy froth. OMGHGF seemed likely.

Despite the above the old Bimmer drove well but my BIL was reluctant to buy a cheap car and spend a small fortune fixing it up. In the end we walked away and came home. No deal.