Gumtree Wonders.

[Shirley Knott]

Do you lot have a thread dedicated to poorly worded/badly written Gumtree adverts? (If so and I've missed it then apologies/mods please delete etc etc)

 

During my usual early morning scroll through the prospects I stumbled across this gem...

 

https://www.gumtree.com/p/audi/audi-a4/1295857482

 

"motor beats perfectly has full stories has the hardly changed emoticons the disc has until august."

 

The idea that someone read that back and thought, 'That'll do' frankly saddens me

 

I could probably find lots more like this but I've got a car to go and look at. It's got hardly changed emoticons/disc till august so I'm going to have to get there quickly

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Gumtree/ageing VAG product/poor spelling.

 

His name will be Tomasz Dziewięćsetdziewięćdziesięc

 

The way things are going, DVLA will need to start printing wider V5's.

[adw1977]

"motor beats perfectly has full stories has the hardly changed emoticons the disc has until august."

 

The idea that someone read that back and thought, 'That'll do' frankly saddens me

 

Looks like the output from Google Translate to me.

[MiniMort]

Ok, fine, it wasn’t on gumtree but I once saw an ad on CarAndClassic for a restored ‘1975 Daihatsun’

[sierraman]

I love those that are usually something like a time expired Mondeo diesel and the ad will go 'glow plug light flashin but my m8 whose a mecanic says its just need a nu glow plug £5 from scrappy'

 

Fuck off you bottom feeder. Its scrap.

 

The background is a big clue as to the owner being an absolute helmet, a score of crosser bikes and a garden full of old beds and shit points to an idiot. Shitty cars and shitty people go hand in hand.

[cort16]

I recon a lot of it is down to adverts written in the sellers native language then put through Google translate .

[flat4alfa]

Do you lot have a thread 

 

http://autoshite.com/topic/28494-worst-ebay-adverts/

http://autoshite.com/topic/29579-best-advert-typos-you-have-seen/

[Shirley Knott]

http://autoshite.com/topic/28494-worst-ebay-adverts/

http://autoshite.com/topic/29579-best-advert-typos-you-have-seen/

 

Balls.

 

I suspected this topic may have been a duplicate *Gets coat* 

[Wingz123]

Poorly educated and grammatically incapable unfortunately....(shakes head)

[sierraman]

Just advertised Focus on Bumtree. I'll keep you updated with the offers to swap it for fucked laptops or just simply offers of '100 m8 its only worf dat'

[Jim Bell]

I bet itll go alright on there at the money man. Fingers crossed

[sierraman]

Put it up at £495 on bumtree. The £95 extra is what I call the Gumtree tax, to cover the time I'll waste fielding calls from people who think if you go past Rotherham, you'll fall off the earth.

[flat4alfa]

Balls.

I suspected this topic may have been a duplicate *Gets coat* 

 

No worries, take that coat off, it'll probably* won't be snowing again until next Tuesday. 

 

On this board folks tend to put daft Gumtree eBay Autotrader eBid Spock etc posts into the same pot.  The main eBay thread is the busiest

 

Oh, and welcome.  32 posts in already 

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Just advertised Focus on Bumtree. I'll keep you updated with the offers to swap it for fucked laptops or just simply offers of '100 m8 its only worf dat'

 

 

 

It would be worth putting a fake advert on Scumtree with a PAYG number just to field calls from idiots and then just insult them for a laugh.

 

Woss ur best price pal - 'more than you've got you thick cunt'.

[sierraman]

'You can have it for £50 if you meet me at Bristol Templemead coach station'.

[ProgRocker]

 

 

https://www.gumtree.com/p/audi/audi-a4/1295857482

 

"motor beats perfectly has full stories has the hardly changed emoticons the disc has until august."

 

The idea that someone read that back and thought, 'That'll do' frankly saddens me

 

I could probably find lots more like this but I've got a car to go and look at. It's got hardly changed emoticons/disc till august so I'm going to have to get there quickly

 

Begs the question how on Earth this seller can sucessfully apply for a driving licence? If indeed s/he has one in the first place.

 

I found a good one on Car&Classic this morning. I thought it was a European ad due to the poor English but the car is brit registered and is being sold in Bedfordshire.

 

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/car/C962888

 

^ Also click this for hot early 1970s Citroen DS action!!

[sierraman]

Its been on an hour and I've had the obligatory '250'

[andy18s]

Begs the question how on Earth this seller can sucessfully apply for a driving licence? If indeed s/he has one in the first place.

 

Well,guess which way this thread is going........

[sierraman]

What's that video from where someone slides a horse under a trailer. That usually comes out now.

[Wingz123]

Well,guess which way this thread is going........

Couldn’t agree more with you Progrocker...

[Asimo]

What's wrong with Gumtree?

 

It's free to use. I sold our old Civic there 18 months ago: 3 calls, two visits, two offers, one of them good enough, cash there and then, no comeback.

 

Adverts have always been a source of amusement as well as endless fascination, particularly to those of us who can splel, but if I want to buy your CX I won't care if your idioms are unfamiliar or computer generated and you've advertised a Citreon Palace.

[Shirley Knott]

No worries, take that coat off, it'll probably* won't be snowing again until next Tuesday. 

 

On this board folks tend to put daft Gumtree eBay Autotrader eBid Spock etc posts into the same pot.  The main eBay thread is the busiest

 

Oh, and welcome.  32 posts in already 

 

Cheers.

 

Thus far I'm enjoying myself

[pilninggas]

I do find the best auto bargains on scumtree are the ones lurking in the 'other vehicles' category. seems like the cheap cars/bikes/vans/trailers often get put in that category and languish.

[clayts450]

I do find the best auto bargains on scumtree are the ones lurking in the 'other vehicles' category. seems like the cheap cars/bikes/vans/trailers often get put in that category and languish.

 

Blimey, good spot - thanks for the tip

[flat4alfa]

Gumtree/ageing VAG product/poor spelling.

His name will be Tomasz Dziewięćsetdziewięćdziesięc

 

Good Sherlocking there RBJ.  ...except Liviu is a common Romanian forename 

 

Imagine coming all that way, only to find the Blighty-registered VAG product really is just as VAGshite as the home product.  It would be enough to get yourself stuck in Bedfordshire with a smartphone for company.

[Junkman]

people who think if you go past Rotherham, you'll fall off the earth.

 

But you do! Fact!

[Bren]

I would rather have shattered glass mixed in with swarf rammed up my sphincter than advertise on gumtree again.

 

It's like freecycle but with delivery expected as well.

[Kiltox]

I would rather have shattered glass mixed in with swarf rammed up my sphincter than advertise on gumtree again.

 

It's like freecycle but with delivery expected as well.

You’ll be ecstatic* to hear that some freecycle spunk trumpets expect that too!!

[tooSavvy]

SM

 

"..Shitty cars and shitty people go hand in hand.."

 

My Toyota must be embarrassed to be seen with me

[sierraman]

Why do people message on bumtree going 'is this still for sale?' Then you hear no more...