It's grim up north....tales from the Primate House

[chodweaver]

Hola! Is it manuel or auto?

[NorthernMonkey]

30 minutes ago, chodweaver said:

Hola! Is it manuel or auto?

Afternoon...as manual as it comes 👍

[chodweaver]

Ta

[tul66]

On 12/17/2020 at 10:20 AM, NorthernMonkey said:

One for the MX5 botherers among us...my MOT man across the yard had a fairly tidy looking 2004 on the test ramp this morning.

Take a look at the rear arms...

 

and yes, the rest is just as bad!

I’ve had to lend him some more yellow chalk...he’s run out of his own!

That's grim. My everyday 1990 Lancia Thema wasn't as bad as that when I scrapped it 2 years ago. Aye, rust buckets those Italian cars🙄

[NorthernMonkey]

Decided to have a play with the van that I bought from here a few months ago. It needed some new tyres so 4 new Falkens were procured the other day and have now been fitted...

Since then, it has proved itself extremely useful as a van in its own right...

(anybody want to buy a scooter? 😂)

However, the elephant in the room was always going to be the caved in side...

Having weighed up the options, one of these was bought from Machine Mart for £95ish...

...and was today opened up and put to use...

 

It’s by no means finished yet but it’s a whole lot better than it was. The grey in the second pic was how I’ve left it tonight with a bit of zinc primer to protect it from the elements for the minute. 
The van came with a replacement section of body that’d been cut out of another van. The actual structure behind the outer panel on mine however is practically untouched so I’ll probably just cut off the outer sill cover from the repair section and fit it to this one rather than spend hours trying to shape and fill the creases at the bottom.

Oh yes, I got a little delivery a couple of weeks ago courtesy of  @worldofceri

I haven’t had time to even look at it yet other than a quick peer underneath whilst sticking it on the back of my truck. It does look remarkably solid under there but hopefully I’ll get it up to the workshop soon for further investigations.

[NorthernMonkey]

Saturday is delivery day....new arrival due in the morning courtesy of our resident shite shifter,  @worldofceri

Any guesses?

 

It’ll be good company for Moxy...

[hairnet]

YOU BOUGHT MOOGS CAMPER BUT YOU DIDNT TELL HIM YET?

 

[Inspector Morose]

I KNOW! I KNOW! I KNOW!

I may* be cheating though as I dragged it half way up.

[loserone]

Is it that tasty red hatch?

[NorthernMonkey]

29 minutes ago, loserone said:

Is it that tasty red hatch?

It’s red and it’s a hatch.

Not sure if I’d describe it as tasty, well perhaps once it’s had the planned engine transplant....

[loserone]

AUQ?

[NorthernMonkey]

10 minutes ago, loserone said:

AUQ?

😂😂

Am i that predictable? 

[loserone]

It's what I'd put in it, should make an excellent sleeper

[NorthernMonkey]

We seem to have a surplus of red 90s cars with a less than optimal amount of topcoat remaining.

I could do to rename myself lacqu...oh, too late.

[hairnet]

northern rain washes it off

[NorthernMonkey]

Today is mainly a collection day but as it’s for my business and not really shite, I felt it didn’t really justify its own thread.

Anyway, currently heading south...

 

[NorthernMonkey]

I should point out that in the best tradition of spending as little as possible, the first class upgrade with complementary nose bag was acquired for £not much via Seatfrog...

PC is currently one and hopefully destined to remain at that for the foreseeable future as I’m not a fan of train facilities.

[hairnet]

Tow stuff lots or put stuff on the back lots

LNER did you a get quinoa instead of pie

[NorthernMonkey]

22 minutes ago, hairnet said:

Tow stuff lots or put stuff on the back lots

LNER did you a get quinoa instead of pie

Chance would be a fine thing...chicken sandwich only cos Covid...

[NorthernMonkey]

Today, I did a thing.

I dragged out of long term hibernation the legend of the Darwen services bin area that is BAL…

Following a chance discussion earlier with @The Moogabout how much fun a small, slingable car can be, I decided to bring the noisy little bugger down to the workshop with a view to a spot of recommissioning.

Also, thanks to BoJo, the divine MrsNM is back in the office a few days from next week and will be commandeering the Lexus so I need transport, at least until I’ve wrangled a new turbo through a seven inch rectangular gap in the inner wing…

I’m not sure what it is with the MX5.

It could be the little stubby gear lever that just snicks in and out; perhaps it’s the proximity to nature with the roof down or possibly the ridiculously loud exhaust that makes old ladies at the bus stop frown?

Whatever it is, the fun factor when driving it is a substantial multiple of its monetary value.

Proper Autoshite?!

[The Moog]

Ohhh I need to sort mine out!

I love the spoiler on BAL - cane from AVO originally.

[NorthernMonkey]

44 minutes ago, The Moog said:

Ohhh I need to sort mine out!

I love the spoiler on BAL - cane from AVO originally.

My breaker one has, I believe, got the same spoiler.

I will remove it in due course to await it's journey to start a new life north of the border.

[NorthernMonkey]

I decided today that, whilst the dead Range Rover is challenging to a degree, what I really need is something to properly get my teeth into.

May I introduce Mrs NMs summer beater of distinction for the year…

 

A C70 D5 sport with a random current drain and a dead roof.

They certainly don’t build them like they used to….

[NorthernMonkey]

Nice dash, though. Straight out of IKEA.

[NorthernMonkey]

My neighbours are convinced I’ve started self harming…

 

Nope. Just fitting a turbo through a hole in the inner wing that is far too small.

 

[NorthernMonkey]

I think I’ve got to the bottom of the current drain on the C70…

That green fur on the battery connector in the sealed alarm module means the bloody car won’t go to sleep properly and drains the battery over two days.

[High Jetter]

Easy fix?

[NorthernMonkey]

Remains to be seen.

It has a couple of issues which I’ll come to in due course but the one which is the biggest pain is the constant discharge on the battery, around 600mah, which drains the battery in a few days.

I’ve tried all the usual tricks, pulling fuses etc but there isn’t one which makes any major difference on its own.

The one thing which comes up constantly on the scanner though, along with roof module-no communication, is the alarm module.

Apparently, it’s a known fault on these…the modules have a inbuilt 7.2v battery pack with an accepted service life of around 8 years and when this fails, the car defaults to running the alarm functions etc off the main battery and will take quite a bit of current.

Quite how it can run the main battery down so quickly when the alarm works ok off a small lithium pack, I’m not sure but there’s lots of reports of it online across V50s, C70s and others on the same platform so we’ll see…I believe the small battery is there so the main ECU can ‘go to sleep’ and because that’s faulty, a few more things that are on the same circuits are staying active as the alarm has to keep itself powered from the main body CEM.

If nothing else, the module was faulty so there’s a new battery on order and that’ll be one more thing of the list.

I’m thinking the lack of communication with the roof module could be down to a poor connection on the twisted pair of can bus wires somewhere but I need to address the current drain issue first.

It’s worth persevering with though in my opinion as it’s the 185bhp D5 sport model with geartronic transmission and a very comprehensive service history in the glovebox, so would make a lovely summer commuting car for the better half who’s now back to doing a few miles up and down the country with her job. She gets something like 45p per mile but with the LS400, it was touch and go whether she was in profit or not!!

[Wack]

On 1/21/2022 at 10:00 AM, The Moog said:

Ohhh I need to sort mine out!

I love the spoiler on BAL - cane from AVO originally.

Me too ,MX5 is  in the garage, mot run out , can't leave it outside because the cat is worth more than the car 

[NorthernMonkey]

As posted on the News24 thread yesterday, this landed in the workshop this morning…

Bearing in mind it came in as a non runner having had the timing belt let go, I first of all pulled the top belt cover off only to find the belt appear intact and nicely tensioned.

Up on the ramp this afternoon for a bit of investigation…

Front wheel, arch liner, aux belt and crank pulley off…

Hmm, a bit of coolant splashed around. That water pump doesn’t look quite right…

Nope. That has been a water pump quite long enough, I reckon…

Not not that but it’s actually managed to neatly grind off a piece of the impeller and deposited it nicely in the thermostat housing!

It’s testament to the awesome Bose stereo and the sound proofing under the bonnet that the previous owner didn’t hear that!

Unbelievably, all the belt teeth are perfectly intact and the timing marks seem to line up ok. It’s all stripped down now awaiting the delivery of a new OE timing belt kit and water pump in the morning. Once that’s fitted and assuming it turns over ok with no locking up on the crank pulley, it’ll be time to cross everything and pray to the VAG gods 🤞🤞🤞