FUN WITH NUMBERS (no C Voderman bum content)

[mercrocker]

Bored of number-crunching at work I turned my thoughts to car digits.

 

You can separate proper shite from modern shite with a few numerical rules...

 

Fiats with 3 digits instead of names (OK it doesn't work for Dino or Panda...)

Peugeots with only one zero

Mercedes with the letters only at the end of numbers and not before

BMWs with no X

Audi below 100

 

 

And so on....

 

 

 

[Junkman]

Audi 200s not proper shite suddenly?

 

Everything that has its taxable horsepower rating included in the model designation. This works equally well for British and French chod.

[Parky]

Any Renault prior to the Clio was numbered. Ergo shite.

 

Exception to this being the Safrane, Laguna, Megane.....maybe it doesn't always work!

[Asimo]

Peugeots? nothing with 6 or more after the zero please. Or two zeros.

Renault? I want a Renault 7 or Renault 13 please.

Rovers? Only those that express engine size in litres. None of this cc nonsense please.

[richardmorris]

The problem with merc numbers before the letters is that they're a lot more expensive that way round and last better too. It's the modern stuff that's cheap and rusts.

[Junkman]

Rovers? Only those that express engine size in litres. None of this cc nonsense please.

 

There we go. My 3500 isn't proper shite. Gutted.

[garycox]

 

Renault? I want a Renault 7 or Renault 13 please.

 

 

 

Unsure whether you think a 13 is a thing, or you don't know what a 7 is...

[Asimo]

I was running through the numbers in my head, and those were the gaps I came up with. Without googling, I expect there was a 7, and that 13 was avoided for superstitious reasons.

 

Edit Renault 7: new one to me!

[garycox]

AFAIK there's 3-12, 14-21, 25, 30.

[Spiny Norman]

Volvos that use only 3 numbers. IE 122, 240, 360, none of this V/C/XC pish.

[Richard]

If the middle number isn't the number of cylinders it isn't a real Volvo.

[Skizzer]

Palindromic numbers for the shite win:

 

Mazda 121, 323, 616, 626, 929

Volvo 262© and 343

Peugeot 404 and 505

Renault 11

Dafs 33, 44, 66

Saab 99

BMW 2002

[passmethegun]

Decimal points get you straight through to the end-of-level boss!

 

Lancia Thema 8.32

 

is there any others?

[Skizzer]

Er, one or two: Escort 1.1, Cavalier 1.6...?

 

[passmethegun]

I IZ A FANNY!

 

Well played sir 

[oman5]

Kia cee'd? they really are clutching at straws using a MISPLACED MOTHERF*CKING APOSTROPHE on a car name. stupid twat's.

[Pillock]

Peugeots? nothing with 6 or more after the zero please. Or two zeros.

 

 

Peugeot 309?

 

If the middle number isn't the number of cylinders it isn't a real Volvo.

 

Wow! I never knew.....

[Lankytim]

I have a Fiat Multipla and it's complete shite. Infact I think all Fiats are shite.

[Micrashed]

What no Carol? Stuff that for a game of soldiers.

Fixorated

[pompei]

Carol Vorderman goes commando

[HMC]

Anything advertising the number of cogs in sticker format on the bootlid. I can't imagine new vws with '8 speed ' slapped on the rear panel, ratio envy isn't what it used to be.

[mercrocker]

Its not really numbers but it is cogs -  remember the little OHC badge on 1600 vivas shaped like a gear wheel?   I suppose we should start a Letters (still no Vordermanian buttocks, unfortunately) thread in similar vein - like all proper Vauxhalls had two letter codes - HB in this case.  (Nothing  to do with the hardness of one's pencil - that's Vorderman, again)