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Posted

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- For God's sake, Bonnie... Don't just stare at me ! Start the fucking engine !

- I can't, Clyde... Those damn SUs keep flooding. I'll just leave it for five minutes, and it should be fine.

- Oh, piss off... I'm climbing back up !

  • Like 2
Posted

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Build your own e-type, this week you get the steering wheel.

and more parts available in our monthly magazine.

 

next months magazine comes with the e-type gearknob.

  • Like 4
Posted

jagwheel.jpeg

 

Build your own e-type, this week you get the steering wheel.

and more parts available in our monthly magazine.

 

next months magazine comes with the e-type gearknob.

Just 7,250 issues...

  • Like 2
Posted

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The chauffeur was astounded that Stuart Hall got away with his obscene behavior for so long...

Posted

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"Nigel are you coming in for your supper or are you going to stand there drooling all night?"

  • Like 4
Posted

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"And to think i was boasting to lads down the pub that my job came with a company car"

Posted

Look love, I don't care who you're married to, you can't drive through the park at 50mph)

 

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  • Like 1
Posted

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"Let's start again, Sister Mary Assumpta. The kittens were waiting at the bus stop..."

Posted

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I honestly don't know where to start with this one!

No I have not been drinking officer hiccup the devil jumped on the bonnet, sister Mary said "show him your cross" so I sped up and swerved around to get him off it

  • Like 1
Posted

I don't know what's happened there I didn't modify triggers orig post in any way just a standard quote, must be divine intervention or my phone has fucked it up

Posted

Why has that Chevette gone from being a shortcut to a stretch in the space of one post?

 

Long wheeled base version? :D

Posted

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HHHHHHNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG ROIDS...AND...EXCLUSIVELY...PROTEIN...DIET...CAUSING....POTENTIALLY FATAL...CONSTIPATION...HHHHHHNNNNNNGGGGG...FUGGOFF...

 

*Warning: excessive use of 'roids will give you a severe case of Resting Asshole Face, unsightly flabbiness and underperformance, and ultimately wasting away to a shade of your former glory. Just like the American car industry.

Posted

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Syphillis? Genital warts? It's syphillis, isn't it Ford? You. Dirty. Bastard. When you said you had it all, I didn't think you meant all the sexually transmitted diseases known to medical science. FYI Ford, I'm not laughing because this is funny; I'm so shocked I don't know what else to do. Next you'll be telling me you've had the dog... What? She's what? Pregnant? Ford, that shouldn't even be possible! Have you no shame?

Posted

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Peasant: "Ah non, madame...le plage n'est pas ici. Il s'agit d'une carte d'Amerique!"

Her: "Oh Bobby, this is useless, we drove all this way, and he won't speak American!"

Him: "Don't worry Wendy, I'll speak to him. Hey Pierre...remember Hitler? Yeah, Hitler. The guy with the little moustache? Yeah? Well, he'd be in charge if we hadn't saved your ass in '45. Now...where's the damn beach?"

  • Like 3
Posted

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Well, of course they can all think that, because it's patently untrue. Because they're poor black stereotypes, and you're a moderately well-off white stereotype. New for '93, the Mercury W.A.S.P....

Posted

^ How the hell did FoMoCo get away with that one??! :shock:

 

Bloody hell this thread is funny. Genuinely LOL'd at some of those. :lol: 5 out of 5!

Posted

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When Mrs Smith asked her husband for a rabbit for her birthday this wasn't quite what she had in mind.

  • Like 3
Posted

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"Now Mr harris if one wants to keep his C.B.E then i suggest you give me a good service"

Posted

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"you bastard, you're gumtree ad said may need a little T.L.C"

Posted

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"Giles you can rub yourself against my leg as much as you like but you're still not driving my car"

  • Like 2

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