is there a shite joke thread?

[Guest]

Italian Police are still interviewing the Korean Honeymoon couple found on the Costa Concordia as to the whereabouts of the rescue dog that first found them.

[pandamonium]

A skeleton walks into a bar and says, 'Get me a beer .. .. .. and a mop.

[Guest]

[Guest]

[Guest]

[Guest]

[Guest]

[Volksy]

I rang my local toy shop to see if they had a model of the Costa Concordia in stock, they did, so they're putting it on one side for me.

[Negative Creep]

 

 

 

 

 

[John F]

I rang my local toy shop to see if they had a model of the Costa Concordia in stock, they did, so they're putting it on one side for me.

 

[Cavcraft]

Irish fella decides to take up boxing and goes for the required medical. A few days later the doctor phones: 'Paddy', he says, 'you've got sugar diabetes'.

'Nice one, Doc' came the reply, when do I fight the f*cker?'

[Guest]

[Des]

The current plight of the Costa Concordia recalls a comment made by Churchill.

 

 

 

 

 

After his retirement he was cruising the Mediterranean on an Italian cruise liner and some

 

 

 

 

Italian journalists asked why an ex British Prime Minister should choose an Italian ship.

 

 

 

 

"There are three things I like about being on an Italian cruise ship" said Churchill.

 

 

 

 

"First their cuisine is unsurpassed.

 

 

 

Second their service is superb.

 

 

 

And then, in time of emergency, there is none of this nonsense about women and children first".

[Twiggy]

Paddy goes for a job interview...

 

"Can ye brew up Paddy ? "

 

....... course I can Sor.......

 

"Can ye drive a stacka truck Paddy ?"

 

....... Jeez ! How big`s the fuckin teapot ?

[fotorabia]

Just after the Berlin wall came down an Ossie in his Trabant was taking his first drive in the West when he came across a guy with a broken down new Mercedes.So he pulls over to help and gets chatting with the Wessie.He has a look at the Merc and asks the Wessie..What does that do..the Wessie replies..Thats the Air Con..it keeps you cold.Again he asks..What does that do...thats the Cruise Control..it regulates your speed.He marvelled at all the modern gadgets and then dropped the Wessie off at the next garage.

A while later the Wessie was taking his first drive in the East and he came across the Ossie's Trabant at the side of the road which was blowing steam and pouring water out of it.So he pulls up and sees that the Ossie is still sitting inside.

Can I help you? the Wessie shouts.

The Ossie winds down his window and says..Yeah its all fine..Im just taking a shower.

[mattblack]

^

 

Reminds me of this one.

 

An East German is sitting in his flat when the phone rings and and the guy at other end tells him his new Trabant will be delivered in 10 years time. "Morning or afternoon?" he askes.

"What does it matter if it's morning or afternoon if it's in 10 years time?"

"Well, the plumber is coming in the morning..."

[oman5]

People with tourettes...what makes them tic?

 

Q.how many people with tourettes does it take to change a lightbulb?

 

 

A. F*CK OFF!!!!

 

1980's revival joke....

 

How many Essex girls does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

 

Essex girls don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in Cortinas

[Des]

I had a condom split on me, I was traumatised, but soon cheered up when I thought of how funny the puppies will look.

[M'coli]

People with tourettes...what makes them tic?

[M'coli]

Here's a couple from days gone by!

 

Dodi Fayed went into Halfords and asked the parts desk for a coil to fit an '81 Princess.

 

What's got 4 legs and goes, "Sssssshhhhhhh"?

Rod Hull's telly.