Bodges that you've done....

[Bren]

I was working on the VDP EFi SD1 that used to belong to Pete, it needed lots of welding and replacement metal (inner and outer sills done, got to put on a N/S front wing yet and N/S rear wheel arch - I will put some pics on the site when I find out how to upload them). The tin worm had been well and truly hard at work.

 

The rear of the near side sill had an 18" section renewed, it was a good fit at the rear but had been overlapped at the front, you could actually see the step in the panels if you looked closely. This had then been filled over to hide the repair. I would say that this had been done in the last few years as the filler was still fairly "fresh" (my lungs will testify to this due to the dust from grinding). The front have the sill had been secured with a few tack welds - not good as it should have been fully seam welded.

 

I don't have a problem with letting in repair sections as long as they are welded properly. It made me think about bodges I have done. I have never done anything that would affect safety, however I remember an old Suzuki GSX 550 that I used to own.

 

The speedo did not work when I bought it, a replacement cable worked for about 5 miles then snapped. I new drive unit was purchased, still the same problem. It was the instruments at fault, even secondhand they were prohibitively expensive. I just decided to live with it.

 

Time to sell arrived, I bunged a new cable on, hoping that any potential purchasers would go on a short test ride and not snap the cable. This proved to be the case, the bike was sold.

 

Two weeks later I was flicking through the auto trader and spotted the bike for sale again.

 

The best bodge I ever seen was one my dad did to a B reg Montego estate he had. Bought from the Rover dealer in Runcorn, he was convinced it had been clocked due to the grief it caused him (they all did that).

 

The gas struts that held up the tailgate wore away at the top and popped off their ball mountings. Two pieces of wood were glued to the outside of each strut, onto the body work, to stop them popping off. These were then painted moonraker blue. These lasted until the car was sold. I am convinced if the beancounters of Austin Rover had seen this it would have been an approved modification.

 

Come on, what have other autoshiters bodged?

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

The tamest bodge of ever- couldn't get a free/v. cheap tax disc holder, so I affixed the thing to the windscreen using white sticky labels.

[scooters]

cramming a McEwans Export can over the dizzy cap as a waterproofing device in a very rusty Mini I once owned. We lived on a farm and I had 5 miles of private farm track to navigate before the roads.....huge puddles and the first time I hit one a wave of water went over the bonnet and shorted out the dizzy which is in such a stupid place on the car that old Sir Alec probably thought he was back in an agean climate when he designed it! The beer can worked for 2 years and was in place when the car was sold

[Rocket88]

"In extremis," using a short bungee as a throttle return spring. Using a condom to repair part of the weird vacuum controlled ventilation / heating system on a '66 Ford Galaxie. Using a lump of chewing gum to repair the sump nut on an old Beetle, and the rim of an plastic dustbin lid as the basis for a repair on a PC Cresta wheel arch

[scooters]

chewing gum is essentila bodge kit - I use it to hold points in place while I try and screw the ruddy things in!

[Rocket88]

I can see this being a popular thread...........

[scooters]

another invaluable glove box item is a tube of superglue....ideally it should be old and have the cap stuck to the spout so you are forced to tear open the tube thus spilling glue all over your ECU....Superglue is great for fixing those bits of plastic when the' uh oh I don't think that was meant to happen' situation happens...

 

Volvo hose - fixed

Saab expansion tank outlet pipe - fixed

door seal on a Maxi - fixed

 

I've lost count how many tubes of the stuff have been used on the SHERPA - it's probably held together with them....

 

it's also very handy for repairing your finger when your spanner slips and your hand crashes into an exhaust heat shield on a Daf 44 which some bloody Dutchman couldn't be to file the edges...the glue that you get in boots for stopping cuts is the same as the commercial glues which are a lot cheaper

[andrew e]

Suffered a leaking waterhouse on a water cooled rear engined transporter. In France. The rear swing arms were rubbing on it; gaffer taped it up, and (obviously) used cable ties to stop it bursting. Drove to Italy where it was amalgamating taped back up. The amalgamating tape was still on it two years later when it was ebayed...

 

 

The next day a co-pilot SNAPPED the gear stick off, in a too fast/dark/shite microbus/roundabout incident...

[barefoot]

not me, but the rescue bloke from the garage...

 

When the n/s/r trailing arm snapped on my Trabant (in the middle of a junction)

the wheel / hub / half the trailing arm moved backwards but only by a couple of inches.

Luckily they were held in place by the handbrake cable which was pulled on so tightly that there was no moving it at all.

All 600 cc & 27 enthusiastic German horses couldn't shift the car at all.

 

Mechanic duly arrived

 

Jacked the car up, driven out of junction on trolley jack!

Then a block of wood tied to both parts of the trailing arm and secured with a pair of whatsit clamps.

 

A couple of mile drive back to the garage, 'Don't worry Mate, I'll follow you & flash my lights if anything falls off'

[Rocket88]

Suffered a leaking waterhouse on a water cooled rear engined transporter. In France. The rear swing arms were rubbing on it; gaffer taped it up, and (obviously) used cable ties to stop it bursting. Drove to Italy where it was amalgamating taped back up. The amalgamating tape was still on it two years later when it was ebayed...

 

 

The next day a co-pilot SNAPPED the gear stick off, in a too fast/dark/shite microbus/roundabout incident...

 

 

 

Did the bloke in the grey trousers ever get his feet back?

[andrew e]

Grey? This is Autoshite, they were biege cords!

[seth]

the dizzy which is in such a stupid place on the car that old Sir Alec probably thought he was back in an agean climate when he designed it!

 

I seem to remember reading that the engine in the prototype was the other way round.

 

Anyway, Copydex is a great alternative to thread lock when trying to prevent A35 clutch linkages from continually undoing themselves.

[scaryoldcortina]

I'm going to assume "bodge" means "emergency roaside repair, made good as soon as possible"

 

My best one of evah was in an old montego estate. The fuel pump packed up several miles from home so I rummaged through all the junk in the back and found a motorcycle fuel tank, some bungees and gaffa tape. I filled the can from the car tank, mounted it on the roof and gravity fed the carb. I think I used the screenwash tubing as fuel pipe.

[scooters]

the dizzy which is in such a stupid place on the car that old Sir Alec probably thought he was back in an agean climate when he designed it!

 

I seem to remember reading that the engine in the prototype was the other way round.

 

Anyway, Copydex is a great alternative to thread lock when trying to prevent A35 clutch linkages from continually undoing themselves.

 

 

A 5lb lump hammer is also very useful for fixing mini clutch linkage bars when they bend due to over enthusiastic gear changing

 

5 large cable ties are also a good way of fixing the clutch linkage under a morris minor when you have wellied it on a stone and the adjustable linkage has broken

 

coathangers are useful to carry around - wire ones, they can be used for a plethora of things and are wonderful at holding exhaust pipes to the bottom of a car

 

A small rubber cap fitted on the throttle of an XU engine can be a very handy throttle return device when it sticks and starts hunting on idle.

 

When trying to screw in a bolt that you need to grip in the socket and you can't get you fingers on it to hold it - cut the finger off a latex disposable glove, put it over the bolt head and then jam the socket on it - no more rooting around under the car to find the fliopin dropped bolt

 

 

I love this - a veritable smorgasbord of bodgery!

[dollywobbler]

the dizzy which is in such a stupid place on the car that old Sir Alec probably thought he was back in an agean climate when he designed it!

 

I seem to remember reading that the engine in the prototype was the other way round.

 

It was actually the gearbox that caused the engine to be turned around. The synchromesh couldn't cope due to inertia in the reduction gears. My brain won't really process why the changed the engine around but it involved using smaller gears, which made the synchromesh last for five minutes instead of one...

 

Many people reckon they did it to stop the carburettor freezing up, but apparently it made little difference. Our Mini has a sheet of rubber cable tied in front of the dizzy (just to get back on topic for this thread) and it's not so much as spluttered even a little bit in the rain since. A simple and effective bodge.

 

I once had a 2CV that snapped a shock absorber mounting. The shocker dropped onto the road, making pretty sparks. I sacrificed some speaker cable to hold the shocker off the ground and continued my journey.

[warren t claim]

On my Minis I always used a rubber glove to insulate the dizzy. I thought everyone did that!

[HillmanImp]

When I stuck the GT6 through the fence last year, it was helpful that it was an electric fence as I was able to use the wire to reattach my exhaust to the car.

[warren t claim]

When I stuck the GT6 through the fence last year, it was helpful that it was an electric fence as I was able to use the wire to reattach my exhaust to the car.

 

Electric fences are a GR8 way to acquire decent leisure batteries.

[scooters]

On my Minis I always used a rubber glove to insulate the dizzy. I thought everyone did that!

 

 

didn't work in Argyll - too wet so constant condensation probs - the best approach was to cover the dizzy cap in vaseline and shield it from getting soaked but allowing it to breath/dry out

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

My bodges are pretty tame too.

 

 

The bottom radiator hose on the elderly Mitsubishi Colt I borrowed in Cyprus burst on a motorway thrash up a fairly steep hill. I fixed it very badly with bits of cloth, wire and a plastic bottle. The radiator was almost dry so I had to squirt the contents of the washer bottle into it and pour my drinking water in there.

Unfortunately it held the water in little better than the gaping hole in the hose, but it was enough to get me into a nearby town to select some more water and waterproof tape which bodged it a lot better.

 

 

My Astra estate cut out at a roundabout with fuel starvation, I surmised that it wasn't able to draw any fuel from the tank so came up with this solution - gallon can of diesel secured* to the bulkhead with cable ties, line to the injection pump straight into it.

 

Annoyingly I didn't plumb the return line in, so most of the diesel ended up in the proper tank and it ran out of fuel 10 minutes later.

it was a bit of a drawn out process refilling the gallon can from the tank but it got me home.

[Richard]

I feel a "get you home" repair isn't a proper bodge unless you leave it for months/years before doing a proper repair.

 

Don't Mini engines come with a plastic shield as standard? TBH, having worked on Fiesta engines, having to break out the WD40 now and again is a small price to pay for having the ignition system where I can see it.

[dollywobbler]

On my Minis I always used a rubber glove to insulate the dizzy. I thought everyone did that!

 

We tried that and the glove just sort of disintegrated. There's still bits of dead glove here and there. It should have a plastic shield, but I think that must have gone missing years ago.

[boobydoo]

I stuck one of those 'peel off' GB stickers over a rust patch on the rear valance of a Chrysler 180 I owned back in 1985.

 

My efforts were to no avail as the car failed its MOT on excessive chassis corrosion about a month later and was scrapped.

[pompei]

I'm dead impressed with some of the ingenuity on here All I ever managed was to liberally coat clear waxoil over plug leads and dizzy in my Mini and I made a flexible plastic shield from a cut up Fairy Liquid bottle.

 

I got hacked off with trying various bodges to stop the Fiat 500 ignition breaking down (usually frying condensor situated right over the exhaust) and got a Lumenition electronic ignition. Some DIY mods just never work!

 

Anyone got a bodge to stop the passenger in a C3 Picasso from putting the brakes on by pressing on the footwell floor?

[Cavcraft]

Using a repair bandage and some 'no more nails' on an exhaust that's still going strong was a nice little fix.

 

Turning the radio up to 'cure' a death rattle on a BX (petrol) coming back from holiday one year.

[Tayne]

.

[scooters]

I feel a "get you home" repair isn't a proper bodge unless you leave it for months/years before doing a proper repair.

 

Don't Mini engines come with a plastic shield as standard? TBH, having worked on Fiesta engines, having to break out the WD40 now and again is a small price to pay for having the ignition system where I can see it.

 

 

not all of them - the shield was usually attached to the inside of the grill and Mini grills have a habit of getting bent/lost etc...

 

I'm pretty sure they were only introduced later in the run

 

even so - the shield was never a great solution

[Negative Creep]

My positive terminal is current secure only because I've wound a coouple of self tappers into it. Since it's behind the spare wheel, the prospective buyer shouldn't notice..

 

 

I probably best not mention the time I solved a stuck rear calliper on my Volvo by removing the brake pads

[M'coli]

My B3 Passat had a knackered heater control, which meant that you could switch the heat off to the footwell but could'nt switch it back on again. I solved that by removing the option to switch it off and stuffed rags in the pipe when feet got too toasty.

[CreepingJesus]

Funnily enough, I rarely bodge cars. Done it on everything else tho'...

My mate Mike lost his Kwak GT550 on the wet cobbles at the top of Mearns St., Aberdeen. The bike flipped, and slid, on its' side until it collected the pavement, wiping out the alternator case. Those Walter Softy alloy 'pots' are a nightmare - look at 'em the wrong way and they split.

Still, he was working as a courier for his summer job, and couldn't afford to be off road. We (mostly me and my mate Bob), stripped the pot off, and duck taped all the fragments back in place. We skimmed the inside with Araldite, and pressed a cut up Coke can onto the tacky 'Dite. More of that round the edges, then took the duck tape off the outside, skimmed that side and glued more Coke tin on. Half an hour in a moderate oven seemed to cure it, so we wrapped the lot up with an extra skim of 'Dite, and a jubilee clip. Covered that lot with half a mile of duck tape, and another two jube clips.

The bodge not only got Mike to work the next day, and the day/week/month after that; the last I saw him, it was still there. I offered to go get a s/h pot out of the breakers, but he wouldn't hear of it!

I did a trailer swap down at Adderstone services on the A1, one time, and went for a nice kip. Woke up to a deserted truck park, fired up, and went to check the lights. No tail lights on the trailer - and it was a right old dog of a thing. Checked the susies, yep all fine. Checked the fuse - blown. Dammit, use a spare. Check again, no tail lights, blown fuse again. OK, Houston we have a problem. Grub around under the trailer with torch and find lots of dodgy wiring. Now, the fog lights and indicators work fine, so hit the gamble button. Take the susie plugs apart, and stick the tail light line down the indicator sockets, and the brake light lines down the fog light sockets. Bingo! Rear lights after a fashion, and no more blown fuses.

By now, it was the wee small hours, and I hit the road somewhat tentatively. Passed two coppers having a break in a layby near Berwick, no problems. Got passed by a Lothian + Borders traffic car near Torness - no problem, and a Fife traffic car off the end of the Road Bridge - again no problem. Bloody amazing. Any one of them could've stopped me and caused all sorts of problems!