Automotive Myths

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

I think it's the back one

 

 

I think it's baws, the Allegro had one of the stiffest shells of the day.

[oldford]

Speed kills.

 

If that's the case why don't all the aeroplane passengers die, it's the acceleration that combined with mass that kills.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

Aeroplanes don't have much to crash into.

[Albert Ross]

I think it's the back one

 

 

I think it's baws, the Allegro had one of the stiffest shells of the day.

 

But Marinas rotted quite badly, it seems.

[tonedepear]

The 1.3 Skoda felicia has a VW engine.

 

(Another ebay classic. In fact that goes for most of the felicia if it's for sale on ebay. "It's a big polo" etc etc.)

[Lankytim]

austin allegros pop the windscreen out if you jack them up in the wrong place

 

confirm/deny?

 

TRUE, series 1's had an issue where if they were jacked up in the wrong place, the shell would distort and pop the rear screen out. This often happened at fast-fit outlets where the 16yr old saturday spanner boy would stick a high lift jack under a corner and jack it 4ft off the ground. The issue was cured pretty quickly via stronger jacking points.

[Lankytim]

I think it's the back one

 

 

I think it's baws, the Allegro had one of the stiffest shells of the day.

 

But Marinas rotted quite badly, it seems.

 

So did Itals!

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

So it is.

[Father Ted]

Scurvy is still a problem on Sealink cross channel ferries, but lemon or lime Rowntrees Fruit Pastilles cure it.

[oldford]

Reference the Allegro screens falling out, I was told that it was due to an inconsistent number of spot welds and the weld spacing, due to manual welding on the production line.

 

On MOT horrors:

 

Tyre:

 

 

On car, 4 years old, 34,000 miles:

 

[Formula Autos]

The tale about the Allegro reminded me of something similar I'd heard about Freelanders. Apparently when the mk1 came out the shell (with Rover 200/25 floorpan, supposedly) on the five doors wasn't stiff enough for off-roading. Rumour has it that one was taken round Land Rover's off-road testing track and that the distortion of the shell comprehensively wedged all the doors shut. The story goes that the occupants had to exit the vehicle via the tailgate.

 

This was told to me by someone specialising in servicing Land Rovers, who presumably had an interest in more people buying the things and bringing them to his workshop. I'd have thought, if anything, he'd have been talking Freelanders up rather than spreading rumours like this.

 

Can anyone confirm or deny this myth?

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

I think they might be, very roughly, based on a Maestro front floorpan.

[Pillock]

They were tested under Maestro van bodies, but I don't know of they use any of the floor pan.

 

Wasn't that the Discovery?

[MrDuke]

If you opened all 4 doors at once on a 1961 Lincoln Continental convertible, the shell would buckle and fold in the middle, as it couldn't support the car's total weight. I actually believed this once.

[Negative Creep]

The Chevrolet Nova sold poorly in South America as it's name translates to "Won't Go" in Spanish

 

 

 

NO. IT. DOESN'T.

[Pete-M]

Pajero in Japanese translates exactly as "My big fat tasteless gypsy grey import".

[barefoot]

Pajero in Japanese translates as ....

 

Is Pajero really Spanish for 'Wanker'?

[scaryoldcortina]

It is south american spanish slang for wanker, yes.

[Father Ted]

The Chevrolet Nova sold poorly in South America as it's name translates to "Won't Go" in Spanish

 

 

 

NO. IT. DOESN'T.

No it means small penis in slang - really, a bloke down the pub who knows all about cars told me.

[Des]

The past decades worth of excessive, bewildering and oppressive vehicular legislation is of no concern. As long as you don't break the law you've nothing to worry about.

[Negative Creep]

A couple of anecdotal ones I've heard over the years:

 

Someone wanting a replacement 710 cap (i.e oil cap)

 

Woman wants a 24 ounce wiper blade (i.e for a Datsun 240z)

 

Another woman complains car runs really badly, mechanics cannot find a fault so in the end ask her to take them for a drive. She pulls the choke out, puts her handbag on it and drives on

 

Jilted wife sells husbands Ferrari for £10

 

Driver sets cruise control on his camper, walks into the back to make a coffee, crashes and sues the manufacturer

 

Someone fits a jet engine to their car to try for a speed record, ends up embedded in a cliff

 

Coppers using a handheld speed pick up a passing jet, which identifies it as a threat so gets a missile lock on them

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

I always knew those Spanish lessons would someday come in handy!

 

The Chevrolet Nova sold poorly in South America as it's name translates to "Won't Go" in Spanish

 

 

 

NO. IT. DOESN'T.

 

It does. Almost. "No va" means "doesn't go".

 

 

 

Is Pajero really Spanish for 'Wanker'?

 

Literally, yes, but it's not the usual term for "wanker". That would be "gillipollas".

[Rocket88]

[

Literally, yes, but it's not the usual term for "wanker". That would be "gillipollas".

 

As in the BMW M3 gillipollas?

[Luxobarges_Are_Us]

 

As in the BMW M3 gillipollas?

 

Sounds about right!

[Richard]

Someone fits a jet engine to their car to try for a speed record, ends up embedded in a cliff

 

I don't know about that but this one is similar.

[simmo]

Jet Car Myth:

 

http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1995-04.html

[AnthonyG]

or how about the story of the Viva that came off the production line with one door on one side and two doors on the other?

ive seen this on many forums, and i suspect its total bollocks

 

I've heard the 'same' story, only it was about a Austin 1100/1300 at Longbridge. Sounds like complete rubbish.

[wuvvum]

Jilted wife sells husbands Ferrari for £10

This is almost true - it was a Lotus Esprit V8, and the wife put it on eBay for 50p BIN - her husband was a DJ and he'd slagged her off on air one too many times. I saw the eBay listing - too late to press the button though, alas.

 

Driver sets cruise control on his camper, walks into the back to make a coffee, crashes and sues the manufacturer

I've heard this one several times as well - given that it allegedly happened in America, I wouldn't be at all surprised if it were true.

[trigger]

I've heard both of those stories before as well, I remember the cruise control one being on the radio news one day several years ago now, Apparently that's the reason owners handbook now tell you to stay at the control of your vehicle when using the cruise, That's one of my favorite pub stories that one.

[Alexg]

Customer myths i've noticed from the sales environment....

 

Your part exchange is worth more if you buy a dearer car.

A big discount on list price when new means you'll be chipped for it at trade-in time.

A big discount on list price means you'll be quids in at trade-in time

Being a bolshy twat gets you the best deal.

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