National Trust spec 7 series: half arsed review and introduction

[TheXUDfiles]

Well, this year has been interesting. Speaking personally I was having one of the worst years of my life this year, and that was even before some dick in China wanted to find out what a Pangolin tasted like. 

Most of my fleet has been scrapped or sold, or is waiting to be. Now the dust has settled, a minty 2005 Polo is my everyday car. A standard, four door Granny spec Polo - maybe shite in five years time? My Mum has given up driving, and offered it to me as a gift. Being my Grandmother's from new, I remember going with her to collect it. So that's a nice slice of reassuring motoring outside which has always been there in the background while various cars came and went over the years.

VWs get a bad rap on here (mostly because they're overpriced junk) but this little Polo hasn't put a foot wrong in the last 15 years, other than needing coil packs soon after I took it on. 

As normality and my sanity tentatively stick their heads over the parapet, asking if it's safe to come out yet, here I am throwing rocks at them  with what I'm replacing the Peugeots and Mercs with. 

I've wanted one since I was about 10, and decided this was the year I deserved one. Deserving for not going all Columbine Massacre and killing every living thing in sight maybe (apart from birds, I really enjoyed watching Yellowhammers over lockdown), or not being committed? 

I'm under no illusions that this will be cheap to run, but considering that I'm consolidating the running costs of five old cars into this majestic '90s lump of capitalism, I'll probably be fine. And unlike many of these things, this isn't a badly modified, neglected piece of poo on Irish plates with Angel Eyes from Wish.com full of water with plastic flowers hanging from rear view mirror.

Mine spent most of its life in Surrey, probably as a retirement car going by the kind of names on old invoices before surfacing on FB marketplace, being sold by a bored engineer on furlough who wanted a project, renewing consumables and fixing little niggles. 

Like most of these on the small wheels seem to be, it's a 728i. People say they're slow, but in reality it's fine. Using the optional steptronic it can shift its two tonnes of weight with alarming ease. The engine doesn't so much roar, but harrumphs at you. Not that this will be driven hard in my care, because it shall be a Sunday car or taken into work when I feel crap and need to feel a little better about myself. 

Because this car is very good at that. It's only now that I really understand the difference between an executive car and a luxury car - something like a 5 series is there to pleasant and competent - this does something to you (other than bankrupt you). Maybe it's the way it's quiet on the motorway and seals you off from reality around town, being your own personal, impenetrable, luxurious bubble. The classy, old money charm  is almost enough to cancel out the turd circus 2020 turned out to be. Anyone else think the '90s were the pinnacle for the luxury car? 

Things which normally irk me on the road don't really register when I'm driving this thing. It also does 32mpg, which is a genuine surprise. And no, the phone doesn't work. The wire doesn't look too clever, so if I get very bored and want to get it working I shall probably start there. Or perhaps you have to engaged in thinly vailed flirting with your PA, orchestrating a hostile takeover or on the phone to your divorce lawyer for it to come alive?

But working or not, it's a nicely Patrick Bateman addition.

If this gets a clean bill of health when I get my trusted garage to check it over, this will be sticking around. The normal e38s killers of bad gearboxes and rotten fuel tanks don't seem to be an issue here, and the seller took care of most of the issues the old boy who had it for the last decade had let slip.

What's left to do? It has the start of the dreaded BMW shimmy at 50-60mph, but I've got an idea of what it is. The infotainment screen is backlit, but doesn't work. Frustratingly for him, the seller got the non-working radio to work again but knocked the screen out somehow! And there's a dented door and a poor repair to the rear bumper. 

And to reiterate, I really, really hope to keep this.  It's the last car on the bucket list, and the one I've always wanted the most. I always said, the first thing I'd do after winning £1,000,000 would be to buy an e38 and spend the remaining £998,000 maintaining it. 

It's a funny feeling having your boyhood dream car outside, knowing it's all yours and you can drive it any time. And just remember: don't be shy of chucking out deadwood for something greater. It's never too late to reinvent yourself.

[gadgetgricey]

Had two and loved them both.

Also your ashtray still closes, so better than both of mine. Seems to be a common fault.
Had mine for about a year before I realised that they had optioned lights under exterior door handles. It was the little things...

Keep thinking about getting another as was an awesome car. Sure you will love it.

 

[TheXUDfiles]

27 minutes ago, gadgetgricey said:

Had two and loved them both.

Also your ashtray still closes, so better than both of mine. Seems to be a common fault.
Had mine for about a year before I realised that they had optioned lights under exterior door handles. It was the little things...

Keep thinking about getting another as was an awesome car. Sure you will love it.

 

Mine has the lights under the handles as well - I didn't know until I got it home

[Macscrooge]

“National Trust spec”. Like it!

[NorfolkNWeigh]

I’ve always preferred the look of an e38 as a 728i with small wheels. The supposedly better spec models always looked a bit too flashy , even when new. 
 

[alcyonecorporation]

An overlooked gem. 

Was Tomorrow Never Dies a factor in this purchase, or did Gran Turismo 2 play a bigger role? 

[w00dy]

Very nice. I do like an E38 and that one looks very handsome on the smaller wheels and in those colour.

[TheXUDfiles]

10 minutes ago, alcyonecorporation said:

An overlooked gem. 

Was Tomorrow Never Dies a factor in this purchase, or did Gran Turismo 2 play a bigger role? 

Gran Turismo 2 without a doubt. Felt so fancy rolling into North City and spaffing 101,000 credits on the 740i. 

The e38 content was the only reason I bothered watching Tomorrow Never Dies, though. Well, that and the bit where he electrocutes German Basil Fawlty with a mobile phone.

 

[TheXUDfiles]

8 minutes ago, w00dy said:

Very nice. I do like an E38 and that one looks very handsome on the smaller wheels and in those colour.

And it's funny how a lot of people seem to feel that way. 

I agree that the sports are a bit too new money looking and gauche - "proper" BMWs are best enjoyed understated. 

[alcyonecorporation]

As I've probably told you (multiple times coming back from the Ace), they filmed that mad TND car chase in Brent Cross Shopping Centre. 
I like how the deflated tyres change from the Sport rims to yours (do not recreate). 

[TheXUDfiles]

1 minute ago, alcyonecorporation said:

As I've probably told you (multiple times coming back from the Ace), they filmed that mad TND car chase in Brent Cross Shopping Centre. 
I like how the deflated tyres change from the Sport rims to yours (do not recreate). 

Funny you should say that, I was talking about that with a friend about that last night. 

And you have no sense of adventure. The first thing a do with a new car is launch it off a multi storey. If it survives, I keep it.

[alcyonecorporation]

2 minutes ago, TheXUDfiles said:

Funny you should say that, I was talking about that with a friend about that last night. 

And you have no sense of adventure. The first thing a do with a new car is launch it off a multi storey. If it survives, I keep it.

At least we know what we're doing when coronavirus regulations permit. 

Would love to see it up my way again, too. 

[TheXUDfiles]

2 minutes ago, alcyonecorporation said:

At least we know what we're doing when coronavirus regulations permit. 

Would love to see it up my way again, too. 

I'm sure it will be back. 

Maybe without a dented door because I've just got a quote to fix it.

[Shirley Knott]

That does look rather special, that interior too...

I often look at these admiringly but they've always struck me as a bit of a 'brass ringpiece' job in terms of liability, as such  I've never had the guts to get into one

Well played, and at least if shit comes to shovel you've always got the Polo to fall back on

 

[TheXUDfiles]

1 hour ago, Shirley Knott said:

 

Well played, and at least if shit comes to shovel you've always got the Polo to fall back on

 

That's what I'm thinking. It can be moth balled rather than fucked off when it does it break if I need to save up to fix it.

[alcyonecorporation]

The engine shouldn't give much hassle - it's probably the most reliable in the E38 range. 
I doubt it's *that* slow; they were still good for 192bhp. 

I know Bosch Mobile Tradition still make the odd sensor for these - but you might be into 'buy another dead one' for parts if things really head south. 

The V8s have all kind of horrendous timing chain issues and the V12 is, as far as my understanding goes, two sixes on a common crankcase with everything duplicated.

[OM646]

It's beautiful, lovely, stunning. Something I can't say about a modern BMW.

 

Somehow I love the "understated versions" of the E38 more, while the E39 looks better with the sport treatment.

[Kringle]

23 hours ago, TheXUDfiles said:

Gran Turismo 2 without a doubt. Felt so fancy rolling into North City and spaffing 101,000 credits on the 740i. 

The e38 content was the only reason I bothered watching Tomorrow Never Dies, though. Well, that and the bit where he electrocutes German Basil Fawlty with a mobile phone.

 

Just check out the colour choices*.

[TheXUDfiles]

2 hours ago, OM646 said:

It's beautiful, lovely, stunning. Something I can't say about a modern BMW.

 

Somehow I love the "understated versions" of the E38 more, while the E39 looks better with the sport treatment.

It's the last BMW to look like a BMW.

 

[TheXUDfiles]

5 minutes ago, Kringle said:

Just check out the colour choices*.

All were actual colours, but people only ever seemed to buy silver, blue or green over here - there's loads of glacier green ones around, which has always baffled me.

[omegod]

I shall forever regret selling my 728i Individual, I chose a quick profit and was very stupid doing so

 

[sutty2006]

I do love a 7 series. 
 

you sir are now winning!

[OM646]

1 hour ago, The Mighty Quinn said:

 

Annoyingly,  I threw away one of those nav screen units about 2 months ago but to be fair they are useless now. It came from an E39 and it just wouldn't take an even remotely recent CD - the Nav disc unit is in the boot. Took it out and fitted an aftermarket thing.

 

Most people seem to go for those chinese Android headunits now

[OM646]

I remember having ordered one of those for a friend with an E39. Looked factory (huge plus, i hate those Halfrauds Special headunits), and came with all the little mod cons in the box like a backup camera and a Carplay USB port. It was cheap (something like 200 quid) and the owner was happy 

[TheXUDfiles]

19 hours ago, The Mighty Quinn said:

That looks like Biarritz blue. The phones in these were Nokias, most commonly a square snug fitting one with 'BMW' printed on, but there was a  Nokia 3110 as well.  I think these were fitted to 728i's.

 

Annoyingly,  I threw away one of those nav screen units about 2 months ago but to be fair they are useless now. It came from an E39 and it just wouldn't take an even remotely recent CD - the Nav disc unit is in the boot. Took it out and fitted an aftermarket thing.

 

E38's are renowned for fuel tank rust around the upper/lower section seams. If it leaks or stinks of fuel with more than half a tank, do the correct thing and only have 20 quid in at a time.

It is indeed Biarritz. Would have preferred Orient, but you can't have everything you want! Handy to know it's a Nokia phone. 

I don't think it's the screen itself at fault, from the digging I've done. Which will probably make fixing it more of a pain, but never mind! 

Yes, I am aware of the fuel tank leaks  This one seems alright - but I'm fully expecting it to go at some stage in my ownership.

 

[Schaefft]

These really are fantastic cars, keep in mind that these basically replaced the W140 S-Class as best car in the world when they came out in '94 (those or the new A8). I had a 728iA myself, bought for an unbelievable 500 quid 7 years ago. Couldn't give it away when I replaced it with my manual 528i (no regrets there), that's definitely not the case anymore, they do increase in value. Still want one, the 728i is sufficient for sure, wouldn't mind a 740i though. Both are fantastic cars and really make you feel special, I'm sure yours is no difference!

[horriblemercedes]

22 hours ago, The Mighty Quinn said:

That looks like Biarritz blue. The phones in these were Nokias, most commonly a square snug fitting one with 'BMW' printed on, but there was a  Nokia 3110 as well.  I think these were fitted to 728i's.

 

Annoyingly,  I threw away one of those nav screen units about 2 months ago but to be fair they are useless now. It came from an E39 and it just wouldn't take an even remotely recent CD - the Nav disc unit is in the boot. Took it out and fitted an aftermarket thing.

 

E38's are renowned for fuel tank rust around the upper/lower section seams. If it leaks or stinks of fuel with more than half a tank, do the correct thing and only have 20 quid in at a time.

Everyone knows that an Ericsson is the correct phone pair for an E38!

[horriblemercedes]

1 hour ago, The Mighty Quinn said:

Do they?

Just joking it was the phone that James Bond used to remote control his 750i in Tomorrow Never Dies

 

Edit: my first mobile, shortly after that film came out was an Ericsson so clearly it made a great impression! I've mostly had Ericsson, Sony Ericsson and Sony since then so that was some successful product placement! I've still never had a BMW though, as much as I still love the 36, 38 and 39 among others 

[bezzabsa]

I would love to scratch my 7 series itch one day.... nice 728 lowered but not much, nice staggered Alpina alloys and in Shark Grey (i think its called) with tobacco leather interior

[TheXUDfiles]

On 12/24/2020 at 8:48 PM, bezzabsa said:

I would love to scratch my 7 series itch one day.... nice 728 lowered but not much, nice staggered Alpina alloys and in Shark Grey (i think its called) with tobacco leather interior

You'll probably end up paying more for the alloys than you will the car! For some reason those Alpina things are worth more pound per pound than gold.