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Laguna escapades **CHEEKY BUGGERS 23/03**

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  • 1 month later...

So, probably time for a little update.

Firstly, the car itself by and large is running very nicely. Used it to go to Guildford and back earlier in the month and it did so, averaging 38MPG in the process. 


It's had a very, very rare (as in, twice since we've owned it) reluctance to start, sometimes requiring a few attempts and a boot of throttle to get it going, but every other time it's first turn of the key instant starts.


Sadly, MrsH misjudged the size of it on one occasion this month and has left a minor dent/scrape on the lower section of the passenger rear arch from the gate post, which transferred some black paint onto the door too, but it's largely superficial and I've got a touch up pen in the car. She's watching me type this, and insists that I inform you that she got the transferred paint off the door before I came home from work....using....toothpaste. Can't be too mad at her, it did work after all.


It's also had, by poor design, a minor water leak in the back, owing to the rear door seals allowing it to pool at one point and run down into the carpet. Quickly hacked at them with a pair of tin snips (it was pissing down) and it all seems good now.


The most annoying thing dropped on our doormat this morning:




Yep, it would appear some cheeky rascal is trying to claim the Laguna as their own. Rob has received a similar letter today as well, so I've emailed the DVLA with all the necessary information to nip this shit in the bud before it escalates. Going to fire an email to the local dibble too just in case the plates end up getting cloned anyway and we end up with speeding tickets from god knows where.

Why claim/clone a £250 car? It's madness.

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My uncle had a similar thing years ago, relating to a Wolseley 1500 he owned that had a nice three letter two digit number, the car was off the road behind his workshop. Luckily he received the letter in time as he was not living in his house. He contacted Swansea and the police to confirm it was still his car, but they wouldn't tell him who was trying to claim it, nor whether there was any come back on them.

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  • 1 month later...

Took the Laguna to London yesterday. Drove fine, with the exception of the brakes started a squealing when off.

Driving back today however was a different ball game. Driving on the motorway, there was a sudden vibration from the rear.

Pulled over to the hard shoulder and didn't need to look too hard.


Profile of the tyre didn't look right.


Whoops. Happened on the M4 too.


Elected to fit the spare.

Men at work.


Closer inspection of the tyre.


The spare tyre wasn't exactly full of air, but it was safer than the original, and we weren't far from a petrol station so we limped it there, pumped it up and went to get a part worn fitted to get us home tomorrow.



The old one was removed, fairly obvious to see what happened.



So folks, check your tires regularly.

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You need a rubbet mallet in the onboard toolbox, they are specifically designed* and named* for hammering bulges in tyres back into shape.

Seriously though, well done spotting it, I suspect an awful lot of people would just carry on until the inevitable 70mph blowout and underpants damage occurred a bit further down the road.

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On 2/1/2019 at 8:14 PM, Eddie Honda said:


Just buy a sack of citric acid powder and a sack of sodium bicarbonate. Thousands of cleaning uses round the home (and garage).


10% citric acid mix for descaling. 5% sodium bicarbonate degreasing. ( https://cdn2.ms-motorservice.com/fileadmin/media/MAM/PDF_Assets/Cleaning-of-Engine-Cooling-System_51423.pdf ) hexchemonline.co.uk (or their Amazon / Ebay shops)


(I must get some in sometime. I'm still working my way through 20L of Isopropyl alcohol)




(small quantities are available)


Fyi one of the places I do mechanical work for is this Tata chemicals plant in Cheshire. WHAT a shithole. All the gantry's and walkways are rotten cos it's permenantly damp which reacts with all the chemic floating in the air! So plus one with sorting cooling systems out!!

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Oosh, one of the Michelin tyres on my Mk2F Polo went like that a few years back - I thought it was a wheel bearing on its way out at first.

Further prodding revealed a kink in the wall similar to your own. When I checked the date code, the tyre was made in 1993, just like the car - so probably the original spare.

Not one of the tyres on that car matched, so I wasn't long getting a full set of new rubber at each corner.

Glad it all worked out, and the Lag is largely behaving itself!


Did anything more ever come from the bizarre attempt by persons unknown to claim the car's V5?

I'd be looking with suspicion at some of the Peugeot dizzler-lickers...

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Nah, heard nothing from the DVLA so I assume they're happy with my series of events.

In any case, I got back from Bristol last night with no further incidents.

This morning saw me change the alloys over for a set of 15" Renault ones with good tyres that I had littering the driveway. Sadly, one is a very slightly different style but they'll do nicely. Loved the old ones but the new ones are growing on me.


The old wheels have been cleaned and will stay for a minor refurb and new tyres in the distant future.

Having had a quick wash today, I then decided to take the old girl out of the 90s by removing the carphone kit.


I then brought it into the '10s with a Bluetooth stereo, which seems to work a lot better than the last Bluetooth stereo I bought. Time will tell, but I bet MrsH won't ever use the bloody thing :haha:



That's enough work on it this month, I'll have a few more jobs to crack on with next month

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  • 2 months later...

Well, this car has been a delight to own so far, so with a week off work still remaining, I decided to start tackling some jobs on the Laguna.

On axle stands.


Front shock removed for a spring change at TwoSmokes garage tomorrow. Surprisingly easy to remove! Bet I won't say that about the refitment.


You can clearly see why it needs changing!


Changed the sparks and air filter today, will finish the service tomorrow. The spark plugs were properly graunched on, with the exception of one which was finger tight. Judging by the corrosion on them, they'd been in there for ages.

Air filter needed changing too!


Busy day tomorrow!

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  • 4 months later...

This has been a fine chariot. A fine, fine chariot indeed.

Popped it in for MOT with TwoSmoke yesterday and got quite the fail sheet.

Nothing major though, so she's getting fettled by Phill and will be ready for another year of service


The fuel leak came courtesy of whoever serviced it before me, they broke the internal plastic connector gubbins of the fuel filter connector, so they simply glued it onto the fuel filter. Handy, until I tried changing the fuel filter and it fell apart. Phill has sorted that out.

He's also gone for new pads and discs up front, cleaned the caliper sliders, and fitted new brake shoes on the rear (awaiting new rear brake cylinders), whilst the load valve has been soaking in oil for a day to attempt to free it up.

Sweary mechanic man:


On the plus side, I think I found the source of the engine knocking on deceleration which I initially thought was the lower mount (replaced four months ago and was shagged tbf).

Turns out 2 out of 3 bolts holding the OS upper engine mount weren't even finger tight and had been undoing themselves for quite some time. Further inspection revealed the cambelt cover bolt was also loose. Quickly whipped the cover off to reveal there is definitely indications to suggest it's had a cambelt change recently, plus the belt was in good health. Few quid saved there!

Whilst it's in, the clutch cable was assessed as 'fine' and the heater matrix is getting flushed out as well, to try to coax some life into the heater for the cold winter months ahead

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

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Glad to see this is still about!  My heater is shit too, think it might be a TADTS.

I'm not surprised twosmoke is swearing at the brakes.  I was ready to set fire to my 11 when doing the rear shoes on that.  Similar Bendix ones by the look of it.

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Hopefully the heater matrix will respond to a bit of flushing - the toasty heaters on both my Lags was pretty much the only reason MrsDC tolerated them.

Not quite as good as the one in my old Volvo 240, but close - they should be able to chuck out a fair bit of warmth, when working properly!

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On 1/7/2020 at 11:33 PM, RobT said:

Glad to see this is still about!  My heater is shit too, think it might be a TADTS.

I'm not surprised twosmoke is swearing at the brakes.  I was ready to set fire to my 11 when doing the rear shoes on that.  Similar Bendix ones by the look of it.

Ask @fatharris how hard I found the rear shoes ! #smugface 

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Ask [mention=18190]fatharris[/mention] how hard I found the rear shoes ! #smugface 
Annoyingly so. Real blink of the eye stuff. Money well spent in my opinion, I'd have spent three hours pissing around with clips before the springs decide to meet themselves into the middle of fucking oblivion.

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk

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54 minutes ago, twosmoke300 said:

Ask @fatharris how hard I found the rear shoes ! #smugface 

Ah, but I'm an idiot.  Everything takes me ages!

Cabin filter for mine then too.  Hopefully the heater will then be more than just tepid.

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