For Sale OMGHGF! Neighbour's 325 Ci Bimmer up 4 grabs - 300 Quid only!

[Junkman]

hi,

 

here we have a unik oportunity to acwire this fast appreciating futur clasic witch is a tribut to it's german maker's in term's of fine enshineering thrubredness heritage tradition racing pedigree bulletproof reliability as bin meticulusly maintained to a high standard by a succession of enthusiast owner's mainly little old ladie's and lots of other horseshit like that lol

 

In short:

 

- OMGHGF!

 

- Y reg BMW 325 Ci with 204,000 miles on the clock from new.

 

- Those giving a shit can look up the MoT history themselves.

 

- Still running okay enough to be driven onto a transport implement, but not any further.

 

- Nice* alloys with good tyres.

 

- Some age related marks as you would expect from a vehicle this old.

 

- Stainless exorst.

 

- Located next to the Junktowers in Stockport.

 

- 300 ONO.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An easy project for the right person.

Would suit enthusiast.

 

Spairs or repays.

 

I've tried to be honest.

[Supernaut]

[Junkman]

I don't blame you.

[Supernaut]

I don't blame you.

You're a fucking ace salesman.

[Jim Bell]

Has the water not just fallen out?

It seems to be on the ground.

[Junkman]

That puddle is weather related.

 

The car came home on the back of an AA lorry.

It runs, but white vapours out of the back pipes and pressurises the coolant with the typical smell associated.

Jay (its owner) says it didn't overheat though. He switched it off the moment he noticed the vapour in the mirror.

[Junkman]

You're a fucking ace salesman.

 

If all of them would be like me, post 1986 would have never happened.

[Cavcraft]

Do me a favour chief and ask him that age old question about the bottom dollar on it.

[Junkman]

I just spoke to him and he asked me to give him the chance to have a discussion with his mechanic tomorrow, after which he can make an educated decision.

I guess that's just fair.

[omegod]

Tell him billy off here is a BMW master and he said it's fucked and only worth £80 

[Cavcraft]

Tell him billy off here is a BMW master and he said it's fucked and only worth £80 

 

But I'll do him a favour and give him £70.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

That's looks nice. How much petrol fluid is included, and would a man the size of Jesse Duke fit through the passenger window opening, if the passenger door were to jam?

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

The car came home on the back of an AA lorry.

 

Must be weird for your neighbour to see a recovery truck blocking his drive. 

[Junkman]

Actually the lorry was blocking my drive.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

The fucking nerve. 

[Junkman]

Yeah, why does he buy such unreliable shit.

[Felly Magic]

He needs a quality* vehicle such as a haunted Rover P6 LOL

[Junkman]

Don't ruin my plan. I'm currently trying to talk him into an MGF.

[EssDeeWon]

So the roadside recovery have diagnosed it?  How can they diagnose HGF from the side of the road?  Anyway it may well of overheated because the temp gauges on these are so heavily dampered they are designed to stay in the middle until it becomes hotter than the sun.

 

Of course it could have HGF but I bet it hasn't.

 

Possible clogged CCV system.

[3VOM]

Actually the lorry was blocking my drive.

Did Mrs Junkman ask: What have you bought now?

[Tamworthbay]

£300 + 1 botl K seel = winna

[Isaac Hunt]

Chap I worked with had one of these, same year, it did the same, lunched the HG.  He is quite hady with the spanners, but he reckoned it was quite an involved job with the VV timing and he didn't really have time on his side, so it was moved on to someone else with spanners and a bit more time.

 

Anyone on here done a HG on one of these ?

[carlo]

It's horrible.  Like the plate though.

[Cavcraft]

It's an SE whic has been chav'd up to look like a Sport, the wheels, lights and exhaust are wrong.

 

I suspect it's rolling on cheap Chinese coal tyres and has a service history that's as empty as Joey Essex's mind.

 

I'd not give you a cup of cold piss for it.

 

Do you want to just stop making it sound more attractive?

[RoadworkUK]

Aftermarket 'facelift look' headlamps, facelift LED rear lights and facelift wheels, despite 325 badges proudly displaying its pre 2004 nature.

 

Not a nice car. Deffo one for the bridge / Billy.

[Junkman]

It's an SE whic has been chav'd up to look like a Sport, the wheels, lights and exhaust are wrong.

 

I suspect it's rolling on cheap Chinese coal tyres and has a service history that's as empty as Joey Essex's mind.

 

I'd not give you a cup of cold piss for it.

 

 

It actually had only two owners, comes with a meticulous service history and rolls on almost new Bridgestones.

The wheels are courtesy of an accidented one after Jay curbed one of his wheels beyond redemption by mistake

and couldn't find a like/like replacement. I think we've all been there (at least I was, so everyone must have been).

He never had the intention to 'pimp' the car, but it was the most sensible solution to a problem at the time.

I think he still has the original 3.5 wheels.

That same wrecked car yielded the exhaust, which was due for replacement urgently at the time.

In the 2.5 years Jay had the car, it gave sterling service despite his admittedly rather digital driving style.

But he isn't a poor man and doesn't skimp on car maintenance.

 

That HGF is pure bad luck, but what can one say if a car did 204,000 miles without a bother?

 

Jay a chav? Maybe he would like to be one, but running his own construction business specialised in this newfangled

kybernetic way of doing things and having to feed a family of five leaves him little time to be stupid, I guess.

[Hendry]

I think that's quite a handsome car, even like the wheels!! However maybe this is because I'm a wannabe council estate chav drug dealer/pimp lol

[Junkman]

Well bully for Jay!

 

Even if you disagree with my assessment you must agree that as a post-1986 motor vehicle it is fit only for the bridge. 

 

Is there a specific rason for you being so full of shit all the time?

[Junkman]

Did Mrs Junkman ask: What have you bought now?

 

The Junkwoman is fully aware that I would never buy such a kwolitee motor.

[oldcars]

Poor BMW has HGF and your getting him to buy an MGF. See what i did there.