Bastard BMW. Compact trauma. What should I do with it?

[sporty-shite]

I think the original thread has been lost, so I'm going to start another to ask for help, advice or pity regarding this thing.

 

The background: I bought this for Mrs S. Shortly after starting to use it, it would struggle to start, and then misfire and not rev. Turning it off and back on again sometimes sorted it, so I presumed electronic. It then failed to start completely, so I called Green Flag, who plugged it in, scratched their head and said it was a combination of cam position sensor fault, MAF fault and the shitty induction kit some previous owner had fitted.

 

Following this, I headed here for advice, and Rev Bluejeans suggested the cam timing may be out, possibly as a result of a slack chain jumping a tooth. So I bought the timing tools from Ebay and checked this. The inlet VANOS was a midges out, so I adjusted that back, and it started and drove really well at sensible revs. Then it cut out. Then did the same as it had. Further Googling and thinking pointed to the timing chain tensioner, which would explain the rattle on start-up, and would also make sense, as the misfire was more likely to occur after a good hard rev which could have put the VANOS out of time and triggered a cam position fault. Or at least that was how my thought process worked. So I fitted a new tensioner, and it's a bit better, but will still go chuggy after a rev. 

 

Now the other problems I'm up against are that the battery is knackered, and whilst it's been sat around, the MOT has run out. Coupled to this, it isn't the tidiest of cars. On the upside, though, it drives really well.

 

So. What should I do with it? I'm loathed to throw good money after bad and never sort the problem, but I also don't want to end up scrapping it and blowing the money I've already spent. It really needs a battery and a proper airbox to give it the best chance of starting and running properly, but then it might also need the timing chain doing. And then it might fail the MOT. And after all that, what will it be worth?

 

So, shiters, it's over to you. All offers, suggestions, ideas and experience welcome.

 

Here it is, the horrible bastard.

 

 

[Supernaut]

Hammer a smaller one over it.

[320touring]

the only one of these worth anything is the 325ti sorry to say..

 

I'd get it flogged to someone who wants to drift it- cut your losses and scarper.

[sporty-shite]

the only one of these worth anything is the 325ti sorry to say..

 

I'd get it flogged to someone who wants to drift it- cut your losses and scarper.

So do you fancy another conversion project? 335ti sounds nice.

[MarvinsMom]

burn it

 

burn it with real fire

 

then say someone stole it.....

[fordperv]

definately chuck a big engine in

[320touring]

So do you fancy another conversion project? 335ti sounds nice.

No can do-the e46 is all canbussed to fuck:(

[Station]

What interior is in it? Mine is Death grey, I'm after a black one (everything).

[mrbenn]

Not got personal experience of these but the diesels seem pretty complicated and fragile as they get older. Looking at the MOT history I'd be surprised if you weren't in for some front arms and a ball joint or two. Not big money but it adds up.

 

I reckon you've got two main options:

 

1) Ebay, spares or repair

 

2) get a battery, get a cheap s/h air box off ebay or scrappy and see if its any better. If not, see point 1 above.

[sporty-shite]

What interior is in it? Mine is Death grey, I'm after a black one (everything).

It is indeed a black interior. Needs a valet, but is in good condition.

[The Moog]

If it needs a test plus battery that is £100 before anything else. Then any money to a) fix it and mot it. 

 

Autoshite would spend ££ and get it fixed. That way you have a running car that you know works

Bangernomics would sell what you can and cube the rest. Plenty of them and easily replaced. 

 

 

 

[barefoot]

Take it to a half decent BMW specialist who will know what's up in a trice and probably have a second hand air box on a shelf somewhere.

Sorted and MOT'd for minimal hassle, then you'll have a proper working car again.

Or sell it for peanuts and aggravation on the bay.

[SiC]

From my experience, at this price point, you'll attract all the idiots on eBay if you sell it spares or repairs. I'll put money on one person turning up, expecting to drive it back home.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Scrap the fucking thing.  I've got £100 for it, but I suspect you're a long way away. You could have the fault codes read but really, these things are shit.

[320touring]

Scrap the fucking thing. I've got £100 for it, but I suspect you're a long way away. You could have the fault codes read but really, these things are shit.

Mr Bluejeans knows best re BMWs- I think this is sound advice!

 

Hell, even I won't touch it..

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Inlet vanos unit

Exhaust vanos unit

Either vanos solenoid

Valvetronic motor

Valvetronic sensor

Valvetronic ECU

Valvetronic eccentric shaft

Crank sensor

Chain stretch, throwing out cam sensor position

 

 

That's for starters. I wouldn't own one! It'll make 150 quid on Ebay or you can break it yourself to make a bit more. By all means get fault codes scanned by a specialist with INPA but unless it's a cheap fix, forget it.

[carlo]

They're pig ugly things too, are they not, especially the later ones with council estate rear lights.  That's just my personal opinion, haven't a clue what they drive like.

[Robson3022]

I had a similar problem with a saloon version of this engine. My advice is to get rid, was the thick end of £1000 to put mine right and it still pissed oil like a sieve. Essentially had a rebuild. It was one problem after another. BMW made some fantastic engines....this wasn't one of them!

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

IIRC, Rover were involved in the design. The K Series clearly wasn't shit enough!

[DodgeRover]

Oddly they drive reasonably well from memory, have you tried cleaning the MAF sensor?

[Station]

Is it 2.0 diesel (M47) or petrol this?

[sporty-shite]

Oddly they drive reasonably well from memory, have you tried cleaning the MAF sensor?

Yes. Along with loads of other stuff, which is why I'm getting g fed up with it. You're right, though. It drives really nicely.

[sporty-shite]

Is it 2.0 diesel (M47) or petrol this?

It's petrol, Dave.

[stripped fred]

Not got personal experience of these but the diesels seem pretty complicated and fragile as they get older. Looking at the MOT history I'd be surprised if you weren't in for some front arms and a ball joint or two. Not big money but it adds up.

 

I reckon you've got two main options:

 

1) Ebay, spares or repair

 

2) get a battery, get a cheap s/h air box off ebay or scrappy and see if its any better. If not, see point 1 above.

I would take this advice. A battery and airbox from a scrappy shouldn't break the bank and you can then at least get it mot'd and decide then.

[Cavcraft]

I'd seriously offload it as it is, that Facebook motors Wigan thing should have people crawling out of the woodwork to buy it. Each to their own (and they are popular cars) but I think I'd rather walk.

[gordonbennet]

I've put on a bit of weight since, but the Diesel version of compact which daughter had at the time was the only car i've ever drive that actually made me tits (i don't have man tits) jiggle uncomfortably, bloody weird sensation too most uncomfortable had to hold the sods with one hand.

 

That made some horrible sounds deep in the engine at not much over 100k miles, so it was traded in whilst still running well.

 

I too would shift it on, don't suppose the airkit was put on to cruise around at 50mph in top.

[Dave_Q]

I'd agree that it's not worth spending another penny on, whang it on your local illiterate people's facebook sales site with the following description.

 

 

BMW 316Ti compact M-sport

remapped to 180bhp (no proof)

MOT just out - wont need anything for next MOT

Has aircon - just needs a regas

Has a slight misfire very occasionally - mate who works for BMW says it just needs MAF cleaning

No stupid offers - I know what these are worth

 

 

Don't specify a price, seems not to be the done thing on these groups.

[Guest Hooli]

Kill it with fire, or sell it to a fuckwit.

[Supernaut]

I'd agree that it's not worth spending another penny on, whang it on your local illiterate people's facebook sales site with the following description.

 

 

BMW 316Ti compact M-sport

remapped to 180bhp (no proof)

MOT just out - wont need anything for next MOT

Has aircon - just needs a regas

Has a slight misfire very occasionally - mate who works for BMW says it just needs MAF cleaning

No stupid offers - I know what these are worth

 

 

Don't specify a price, seems not to be the done thing on these groups.

 

You have satire down to a fine art, sir.

 

If you did post that on a local facebook group, the illiterate twats probably couldn't tell if it was real or a pisstake.

[Dave_Q]

You have satire down to a fine art, sir.

 

If you did post that on a local facebook group, the illiterate twats probably couldn't tell if it was real or a pisstake.

 

Since I trimmed my fb friends down to only people I know and regularly see (i.e. very few actual people) my feed is about 70% ads like that from local car selling groups.

 

 

Does need the spelling and grammar taking down a few dozen levels though.