The Future of Shite is Doomed - Frankfurt Horror Show Report

[lisbon_road]

Thanks for sharing, but there is something wrong with the world with all this effort going into all this self indulgence when people are starving.

 

I suppose the argument is that producing all this stuff allows us to have a decent economy and be able to do things.

 

Doesn't feel comfortable though.  I am in no rush to buy any of it.  I s'pose its nothing new too really.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

The cactus is 100% future shite.

This. Fantastic thing. Wouldn't want one, though.

[The Moog]

This. Fantastic thing. Wouldn't want one, though.

I would... But then complain about leaky roof before applying stupid amounts of sikaflex and gaffer tape

[Partridge]

I'll have the 7 series in 20 years time it's leaking from every pipe under the bonnet, the leather is cracked, the sunroof is broken and has been parked under a tree for 6 months and the alloys are leaking.

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Yesterday I bought Autocar, just because of the Jag Pacemaker thing on the cover. What a waste of £3.80, I thought it was about 2 quid ,and when did they start printing it on bog roll?

Anyway ,that Jag thing sounds as if it's only the size of an X3, which probably means it's yet another iteration of the Gaylander 2 ,Ewok and Disco Spurt platform. Also it's expected to become the biggest selling Jaguar within a couple of years, which means the first XF and current XJ will probably be the last non aggressive, elegant Jaguar shaped Jags, Malcolm Sayer must be spinning in his aerodynamic coffin.

 

But ,in the same issue I discovered there's a New* MG6 and an MG 4x4 thing- guaranteed 23 carrot Futureshite.

[Junkman]

Has MG a stand at Frankfurt?

That would see me in a serious roffle fit.

[Junkman]

Thanks for sharing, but there is something wrong with the world with all this effort going into all this self indulgence when people are starving.

 

I suppose the argument is that producing all this stuff allows us to have a decent economy and be able to do things.

 

Doesn't feel comfortable though.  I am in no rush to buy any of it.  I s'pose its nothing new too really.

 

The only thing wrong with the world is that too many people are fully content with being enslaved by a bunch of psychopaths.

But that's not my fucking fault, so I blatantly refuse to feel uncomfortable about it.

[J-Rod]

MINI
 
They finally succeeded in out-sizing a 1973 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser:
 

 
They say the ECU now contains the largest micro-chip of the World.
 
 

 

 

This lot really have jumped the shark now. Seriously, do they not understand irony?! 

[anonymous user]

I hope Morgan had a stand there, with the slogan "Building basically the same car since 1937" or, in the case of the three wheeler, 1909

[brickwall]

In 20 years time I'm going to think that is the dog's bollocks. I hate my aged self already.

 

 

I was just going to type something similar. At 20-25 years old it may be a cracking bit of shite, but I doubt there will be any around in a quarter of a century. The rest of the cars there are just dumb, uninspired and generally woeful.

[Lukas]

But as there is so much peer-pressure in our society and the opinion-leaders are stupid fu**ers, people will buy finance new VAG- and other german "premium"-shit in huge numbers like they did the years before. Badge-snobbery is getting bigger and bigger because of the influence of marketing-dummies on the normal "Leistungsträger". Junkman may translate that please. 

 

Where do I get in contact with that? When I turn up in my old Pajero V6 called "50 shades of brown", people look at me like I am the personified poverty. I hate the society like it is now. Sadly, I am slowly getting more and more frustrated about all that. I hope there is a pleasant end waiting ahead. 

[Junkman]

Ist Leistungsträger neuösterreichisch für Haberer?

[Cavcraft]

Oh good* a thread about how crap new cars are.

[Lukas]

Ist Leistungsträger neuösterreichisch für Haberer?

 

 

 "Leistungsträger" ist eine abfällige Bezeichnung für diese Anzug-Yuppies (Bankangestellte, Marketing-Hanseln, Projektmanager etc.) im schwarzen A4, die sich furchtbar wichtig vorkommen, überall alles besser wissen, alle Dienstleistungsberufe als Kunde tyrannisieren und sich furchtbar aufbudeln, wenn ihrer "Marie Sophie" im Kindergarten ein bisschen zu wenig Saft eingeschenkt wurde. 

 

Definitiv keine Haberer! 

[sloth]

my parents got rid  of thier quashquai today and bought a hyundai tucson. hmmmmmm

[John F]

FORD

 

They arselifted an Edge:

 

 

Apart from that, they continue to build their lineup of vintage cars unchanged..

 

 

[martc]

M6:
 

 

 

 

Manfred, Wolfgang, shove that heap out of the way, yes. We need a shot of the Mini. These dystopian warehouses are expensive to rent, no? We must save every Euro to pay for our world domination.




 
 

[Junkman]

Manfred, Wolfgang, shove that heap out of the way, yes. We need a shot of the Mini. These dystopian warehouses are expensive to rent, no? We must save every Euro to bail out Greece.

 

 

EFA

[Junkman]

 

 "Leistungsträger" ist eine abfällige Bezeichnung für diese Anzug-Yuppies (Bankangestellte, Marketing-Hanseln, Projektmanager etc.) im schwarzen A4, die sich furchtbar wichtig vorkommen, überall alles besser wissen, alle Dienstleistungsberufe als Kunde tyrannisieren und sich furchtbar aufbudeln, wenn ihrer "Marie Sophie" im Kindergarten ein bisschen zu wenig Saft eingeschenkt wurde. 

 

Definitiv keine Haberer! 

 

It would be nice if a term for those wankers was coined in English.

 

What Lukas means are those self-righteous know-it-all suit wearers, who think the pinnacle in life is having a 55" flatscreen in their neo-Georgian new-dev with styrofoam columns at the door and fake marble work surfaces in the kitchen and some leased Teuto-chod parked on the brick drive. Their offsprings are of course prodigies and need special treatment at public school.

In reality their entire life is on tick and they barely own their knickers.

[rml2345]

I hope Morgan had a stand there, with the slogan "Building basically the same car since 1937" or, in the case of the three wheeler, 1909

Their slogan should be "I bet you've not seen one of these in ages".

 

Bar the odd exception all new cars eventually go through their shite phase and the weird looking stuff at Frankfurt will do the same.

Meanwhile shiters will deride new cars whilst buying up budget Focuses and other stuff derided 15 years ago.

[Junkman]

Meanwhile shiters will deride new cars whilst buying up budget Focuses and other stuff derided 15 years ago.

 

No I won't. I'm still deriding today what I have derided since 1986.

[Bear]

Yesterday I bought Autocar, just because of the Jag Pacemaker thing on the cover. What a waste of £3.80, I thought it was about 2 quid ,and when did they start printing it on bog roll?

Anyway ,that Jag thing sounds as if it's only the size of an X3, which probably means it's yet another iteration of the Gaylander 2 ,Ewok and Disco Spurt platform. Also it's expected to become the biggest selling Jaguar within a couple of years, which means the first XF and current XJ will probably be the last non aggressive, elegant Jaguar shaped Jags, Malcolm Sayer must be spinning in his aerodynamic coffin.

 

But ,in the same issue I discovered there's a New* MG6 and an MG 4x4 thing- guaranteed 23 carrot Futureshite.image.jpg

 

The Jaguar is on a new platform - Freelander and Evoke are on Ford EUCD IIRC, same as a Focus/Volvo C30 etc. but they'll move over to the new aluminium platform with the next update. Seems odd that the very new DIscovery Sport is also EUCD, but it is - though it has the new engines.

 

I saw one of those MG CS things at Toddington services, all "really inconspicuous" camo, like a crap version of Jaguar driving 'prototypes' around the A46 with hastags and twitter accounts on them. Took some pictures, decided they were excruciatingly dull and did nothing with them, saw some 'spy shots' published of the same car, but not as well framed (I didn't see any point rushing) in AutoBilge or something like that. Like we haven't already seen the production thing on sale in China for months.

[J-Rod]

 

Bar the odd exception all new cars eventually go through their shite phase and the weird looking stuff at Frankfurt will do the same.

Meanwhile shiters will deride new cars whilst buying up budget Focuses and other stuff derided 15 years ago.

Hmm, I'm not so sure that many of these will last long enough to become shite. They'll be recycled as soon as their 'lifespan' ends (i.e., the minute they're out of warranty) 

 

As an aside, I think the new model Mazda 6 is destined for shiteness, in theory (if any of them last that long) 

[Bear]

7th Gen Celica. Shite or just too dull?

[J-Rod]

Debatable... I don't think they've got the charm that the earlier ones had! Then again, they might grow on us. 

[dugong]

MG launches another brilliant* new model. I'm surprised it could be arsed turning up at Frankfurt;  I mean, it's not as if it failed to show a GS when PoL was 400 yards down the road or anything. 

[Bear]

GT86 - Future shite?

[oldcars]

I enjoy having a look at the new stuff, thinking what will i get in 10 years time. Fancy a MG6, a Dacia Duster or a Great Wall Steed. Never know might afford all or just get two and win the other in a raffle on here.

[Junkman]

MG launches another brilliant* new model. I'm surprised it could be arsed turning up at Frankfurt;  I mean, it's not as if it failed to show a GS when PoL was 400 yards down the road or anything. 

 

Brilliance was arsed to turn up at Frankfurt a few years ago, so I wouldn't be surprised if MG did.

Still, the thought alone has me in stitches.

[rml2345]

As an aside, I think the new model Mazda 6 is destined for shiteness, in theory (if any of them last that long)

Have to agree, the current Mazda 6 is one of the best looking cars in production IMHO. As long as they don't rot as spectacularly as the previous model I'd be well keen on one at shite money.