I'll get round to it at some point - The Man from the Ministry says Disco

[Rust Collector]

Well, I’ve been messaging the eBay seller of the handbrake module and I’ve had fuck all response, which is marvellous.

I’ve requested to cancel that order, and I’ve ordered the next cheapest used module for £50.

Now watch as the cancellation is declined and I end up with two of the fucking things…

[Stinkwheel]

3 minutes ago, Rust Collector said:

Well, I’ve been messaging the eBay seller of the handbrake module and I’ve had fuck all response, which is marvellous.

I’ve requested to cancel that order, and I’ve ordered the next cheapest used module for £50.

Now watch as the cancellation is declined and I end up with two of the fucking things…

Look on the brightside, you will have a spare for the next time a Land Rover product decides to spit the dummy

[Split_Pin]

Hope you get it sorted man.

 

[Rust Collector]

The cancellation was accepted, and the replacement has arrived.

I fitted it to the Disco just to test it could communicate, and whilst it is happily talking to the rest of the car it is throwing an error… calibrating the yaw sensor and then running the un-jam procedure on my scan tool removes this, but it comes back after disconnecting the battery and I can’t remember if the old one did that. Either way, it does clear down which will hopefully be enough for the MOT.

Once I was happy(ish) that I’d be pressing on with it, I opened it up to swap the cables out.

Whilst in here, I checked the gears to make sure they weren’t chewed up. They seem fine:

Cables in next - these cheap Chinese copies are about as good as you’d expect for £7 each; the threaded rod on the nearside cable is like a fucking banana.

And cover back on.

My mrs must be feeling sorry for me as I didn’t get a bollocking for playing with this on the dining table and living room floor. Either that, or she’s completely given up.

I’ll try and get it fitted over the next few days, tomorrow I’m off to go and pick up an arc welder in the evening so it may be a Friday/Saturday job now.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that this sorts it out, and that I shouldn’t have fitted the original cables instead of the shitty replacements.

[Rust Collector]

A small update - before work this morning I used my scan tool to set the unit to the ‘mounting’ position, where it slacks the cables off fully to allow for mounting the handbrake shoes.

It made noises, which was promising.

On my lunch break, I popped the cover off:

What we are looking at there is the mechanism moved out to the mounting position - so for the moment, it looks like the banana shaped cable end isn’t going to ruin my life completely.

I now need to remove the rusted mounting studs from the module (should’ve used my old case!) and then I can refit everything.

I’m just praying that the gears don’t strip out as a result of the increased resistance from that cable end, or that it doesn’t throw a code due to a higher load on the motor or something.

[beko1987]

That little motor looks identical* to the 12/24v little brushroll motors in the floorheads of most cordless stick vacs 😬😂

Edit it is! Made by Johnston, same people who made the dyson dc25/40/41/55/a decades worth of models of brushroll motor. Which has about a 60 hour rated life from the spec sheet I found once! After many many hours of making a dyson brushroll spin the comm explodes a segment! I'd imagine that motor is spinning a bit slower and for less time though (does it just spin and stop and the gearing make everything else work?)

Good luck. No one made nice metal cog replacements for it all yet? 

[beko1987]

https://dysonmedic.co.uk/dc25-dc41-cleanerhead-brushbar-motors-now-available/

 

[Stinkwheel]

Very similar motor, also made by Johnston have been fitted to Snap-On cordless drills and Impacts for years before they went brushless, they are quite hardy little motors

[Rust Collector]

Well, I don’t fancy doing that a second time! Putting that back together was even more frustrating than I anticipated.

First up was to chase the threads for the mounting bracket. As ever, I came to regret the fact that I still haven’t bought a tap socket. Either way, what looks like a section cut from the titanic is now firmly attached to the car, which is a lot better than how I found it (flapping in the fucking breeze).

This might seem like a fuss, but apparently there is a yaw sensor in there, and to minimise the chance of dashboard Christmas coming early I reckon it is best to have this secure, like the computers would expect it to be.

Routing the cables made me lose most of my remaining will to live.

The strings were a good idea in principal, but didn’t work in practice. Laying on the floor and pushing the cables through by hand, swearing loudly and doing it several times over until you got the routing right turned out to be the best* method. I very much get the feeling that all the cable routing was done with the body off, and the handbrake cables went in before a lot of the looms and pipes. I have lots of new cuts and scrapes.

Whilst re-fitting the emergency release cable I got a load of rust in my eye as well. Washing it out with a glass, and then in desperation a hose, did not work. Eventually, stretching my eyelids and poking around with a cotton bud got a lump out that was about a mm in each direction - not huge admittedly, but that was fucking painful. I went and found my goggles after that…

I then refitted the parking brake shoes. That was another shit job - it’s the kind of thing where a moron like myself fits bits like this upside down:

and for good measure everything goes ‘SPRONG!!!’ every now and again, and the part you’re fitting tries to consume your digits:

I put some music on, drank a pot and a half of coffee and that seemed to do the trick.

I had stripped and lubricated the adjusters, so adjusting the shoes wasn’t too miserable.

The hand brake now works, which is a result, and so I was able to put everything back together.

I reckon the nearside needs a final adjustment, but otherwise I am calling the EPB episode of my life with this car done.

Annoyingly I did get the usual ABS/stability warnings shortly after starting the car and moving it. Using my scan tool I noticed that the steering angle sensor was a bit off with the wheel straight and so I calibrated that. I’m hoping that was my problem, as I’m not in the mood for more canbus shittery at the moment!

[Rust Collector]

Not wanting to feel left out, the Clio got a puncture yesterday.

It’s the sort of thing I’d normally chuck a plug in, but my mrs didn’t notice it before pulling away and so it’s been driven about a car’s length whilst completely flat. It’ll be getting launched into the garden, and a pair of part worns thrown on the front.

Not content at needing tyres, the EML light came on whilst doing a three hour run yesterday.

It still drove fine so it wasn’t worrying me, but seeing as I had the scan tool out I thought I’d take a look.

Hmm. It’s got a couple of shagged glow plugs so I’m aware of that, they just haven’t been replaced as they need drilling out and I’m yet to buy the kit to do that.

The injector code is new though. I hope the little Clio isn’t building up to needing some money spent on it. Mrs Rust had reprimanded me when the light came on, saying I was winding the Clio on too far - maybe she was right, and that combined with the fuel system is getting a bit tired had thrown out a value that the computer didn’t like.

I’ve saved the report and cleared the code down.

I’ve since been on a run to get some gin and tonic and it hasn’t come back yet. This one is being filed under ‘it’s fine for now, but expect it to explode the moment you desperately need it to work’.

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, Rust Collector said:

Not wanting to feel left out, the Clio got a puncture yesterday.

It’s the sort of thing I’d normally chuck a plug in, but my mrs didn’t notice it before pulling away and so it’s been driven about a car’s length whilst completely flat. It’ll be getting launched into the garden, and a pair of part worns thrown on the front.

Not content at needing tyres, the EML light came on whilst doing a three hour run yesterday.

It still drove fine so it wasn’t worrying me, but seeing as I had the scan tool out I thought I’d take a look.

Hmm. It’s got a couple of shagged glow plugs so I’m aware of that, they just haven’t been replaced as they need drilling out and I’m yet to buy the kit to do that.

The injector code is new though. I hope the little Clio isn’t building up to needing some money spent on it. Mrs Rust had reprimanded me when the light came on, saying I was winding the Clio on too far - maybe she was right, and that combined with the fuel system is getting a bit tired had thrown out a value that the computer didn’t like.

I’ve saved the report and cleared the code down.

I’ve since been on a run to get some gin and tonic and it hasn’t come back yet. This one is being filed under ‘it’s fine for now, but expect it to explode the moment you desperately need it to work’.

That tyre had some life left. M8 just got 2 very decent part worns from Westham, £40 each for a Fiat 500. Looked nearly new.

[Rust Collector]

10 hours ago, High Jetter said:

That tyre had some life left. M8 just got 2 very decent part worns from Westham, £40 each for a Fiat 500. Looked nearly new.

The tread was still ok, but both fronts were perishing to be fair and so they were already ear-marked for changing.

Motorama in Newhaven do part worns for about £23 fitted in this size, so it’s not even worth me buying them elsewhere and fitting them. Similar to your mate’s experience, most of the stuff they have fitted for me in the past had at least 6mm or so tread!

[Rust Collector]

Not a hugely exciting update, but tonight I checked the lights over on the disco ready for MOT. Whilst doing the work underneath it previously, I had already checked the gaiters etc. that I could reasonably access, and chucked underseal over anything too crunchy.

I then set about emptying the car. As is customary for non-running cars, it’s been used as a shed for the past year. So I made some space in my actual shed, and moved the four railways baseboards and other assorted timbre into there. All the remaining unfitted trim for the proton was moved to the boot of the proton. The assorted family crap was either binned or returned to the house. I’ve then set up the seats ready for the man from the ministry.

These pictures are probably of no interest to anyone, but to me it’s a novelty that all the seats are up and there’s no junk in the car - it’s almost as exciting as a functioning handbrake.

I think I’ll do a final adjustment of the handbrake, and then get it booked in for a ticket at the weekend. Fingers crossed it goes through, as I would actually love to start using this as the family wagon again; it’s a bloody comfortable thing to roll about in.

[stuboy]

are those epb modules same as X% beemas?

[stuboy]

Just now, stuboy said:

are those epb modules same as X% beemas?

X5

[Rust Collector]

10 hours ago, stuboy said:

are those epb modules same as X% beemas?

I’ve just had a look - they’re both made by Küster, not identical but they’re very similar. I suspect the mechanism is the same, but the electrics are presumably different as the pinning is different.

[Christine]

The Ex  Rust Collector  Clio got new brake shoes on  the rear today . None of that  lectrix  shit on   that !  While

 it was up in the air  i noted both rear springs were broken ,   the nearside broken a long way up too.  I'm suprised it hadn' t popped off  the lower cup .. I told swmbo not to drive it until they're changed.. so she's got the Polo . With dozy dustman just  sending me a tenner p.p.  for a bus model , and a pair of springs on ebay being 23 quid, they  only kinda cost me 13  Quid    .  Brake shoes were only 22 quid at Jayars too.   My missus has now put 16000 miles on it  so far ..

 

[Christine]

Well ...not even 24hrs and  R.C's    Clio springs are here !  free postage too !

 

⁸

[Rust Collector]

19 hours ago, Christine said:

The Ex  Rust Collector  Clio got new brake shoes on  the rear today . None of that  lectrix  shit on   that !  While

 it was up in the air  i noted both rear springs were broken ,   the nearside broken a long way up too.  I'm suprised it hadn' t popped off  the lower cup .. I told swmbo not to drive it until they're changed.. so she's got the Polo . With dozy dustman just  sending me a tenner p.p.  for a bus model , and a pair of springs on ebay being 23 quid, they  only kinda cost me 13  Quid    .  Brake shoes were only 22 quid at Jayars too.   My missus has now put 16000 miles on it  so far ..

 

 

21 minutes ago, Christine said:

Well ...not even 24hrs and  R.C's    Clio springs are here !  free postage too !

 

⁸

I always somewhat regret letting that Clio go, it had always been a dependable thing in the time we had it!

I seem to recall it had at least one spring replaced on the front in the past, as did the older Clio we have now - must be a Clio thing.

Glad to hear that it’s racking up the miles whilst not costing vast sums of money! I’m pleased it has found a good home.

[Christine]

* Could go full circle yet! ...The 2 , her  indoors ,  want an  small automatic,    for young her to learn to drive in ..

[Rust Collector]

16 minutes ago, Christine said:

* Could go full circle yet! ...The 2 , her  indoors ,  want an  small automatic,    for young her to learn to drive in ..

If/when you do come to sell it then do give me a nudge. If I’m in a position to buy it then I expect I’d have it back 😅

[Split_Pin]

Disco looks great in black with beige leather interior! Good luck for the MOT.

Can I just make a small suggestion, feel free to tell a patronising bastard to sod off though! 

One thing I have learned quickly after buying the RR is to check the lifting capacity of stuff. My jack was fine and I have a range of axle stands but only these:

https://ebay.us/m/4wvAnU

have an individual capacity of 2 tonnes each and a combined capacity of 3 tonnes as a pair.

I also have other pairs like the ones in your pictures but those are only able to lift 2 tonnes as a pair. Given the weight of these things they may or may not be on their limit. I'm shit at maths so each corner of the car might be under the limit but I wasnt sure so just wanted to say. One of the stands looks like its bending a touch or it could just be the picture.

Anyway I'm an absolute amateur and a noob to Land Rovers so what do I know 😅

[Rust Collector]

1 hour ago, Split_Pin said:

Disco looks great in black with beige leather interior! Good luck for the MOT.

Can I just make a small suggestion, feel free to tell a patronising bastard to sod off though! 

One thing I have learned quickly after buying the RR is to check the lifting capacity of stuff. My jack was fine and I have a range of axle stands but only these:

https://ebay.us/m/4wvAnU

have an individual capacity of 2 tonnes each and a combined capacity of 3 tonnes as a pair.

I also have other pairs like the ones in your pictures but those are only able to lift 2 tonnes as a pair. Given the weight of these things they may or may not be on their limit. I'm shit at maths so each corner of the car might be under the limit but I wasnt sure so just wanted to say. One of the stands looks like its bending a touch or it could just be the picture.

Anyway I'm an absolute amateur and a noob to Land Rovers so what do I know 😅

No need to apologise mate, no harm in calling out things that you don’t think are right.

I can’t definitively dispute your claim that they aren’t rated for the weight, purely because they don’t have a weight rating on them - we could possibly say that this is reason enough not to use them. However, I’ll run through the thought process behind using these ones.

I have somehow acquired a daft number of axle stands. I have some pairs in this style rated at 2 tonne a pair, I have some pairs in this style rated at 3 tonne a pair. I also have some of the style you linked to, albeit 1 tonne per stand, which are my go-to set. I then have the ones shown in my posts with the disco, which I rarely use because they are enormous and a pain in the arse to get under anything.

My go-to set were no use, as to lift the Disco past the rear suspension articulation meant that the stand was at full extension, making it less stable than I would be comfortable clambering under.

As you say, the two tonne pair aren’t even a contender - you just look at the fuckers and they bend. I’ve probably bent two or three of them over the years on much smaller cars!

The big bastards then; whilst I have no idea of their rating, they’re made of thicker metal than any other set I have, approximately 5mm. They’re also made of angle which has been cut and bent to shape, which I reckon is stronger than the curved leg ones.

The tube inside is much the same; huge compared to the smaller set. It also has spider webs reinforcing it.

The saddle is a piece of angle that’s about 7mm thick and wide enough to swallow pretty much and chassis leg and not let it slip out.

Did I mention that they’re huge? 😅

I did think about the weight of the Land Rover too; mine has a kerb weight of about 2,400kg and a max permissible rear axle weight of 1,900kg.

With this in mind, I was confident I was putting less than 2 tones on the stands as a pair, whilst also being confident that that stands are good for well over that weight - I suspect they’re the strongest stands I own, and they’re the ones I normally use on 4x4s.

For belt and braces, I did what I always do for safety - I left the 3 tonne jack with the saddle under the diff as a third contact point, and I rocked the fuck out of the disco before going under it, same as I do on anything I put on stands. If I can’t push it off the stands by trying then I reckon it’s as safe as it is getting. The wheels then went under the sills, just in case everything still went wrong.

I will add that this long answer isn’t a pop at you, more that I’d be mortified if someone saw my post and thought that you could use smaller kit to lift it, then harmed themselves! Even knowing that it was probably ok, I still did my best to minimise the work I did under it, and if I was under it to then try and position myself out the way of the worst crush points should it fall.

I did also did just pop both of the big stands on a flat surface just to check if they’d bent and I’d not spotted it - they’re both ok! 🙂

[Surface Rust]

Jack stands are vital for that extra height!

Good luck with the MoT. Your tenacity is inspirational to read about from the comfort of my sofa!

[Rust Collector]

1 minute ago, Surface Rust said:

Jack stands are vital for that extra height!

Good luck with the MoT. Your tenacity is inspirational to read about from the comfort of my sofa!

Haha cheers! The friend who donated those axle stands to me was someone who would see that pic as perfectly acceptable work practice - stunt work, as he would call it 😅

[Split_Pin]

2 hours ago, Rust Collector said:

No need to apologise mate, no harm in calling out things that you don’t think are right.

I can’t definitively dispute your claim that they aren’t rated for the weight, purely because they don’t have a weight rating on them - we could possibly say that this is reason enough not to use them. However, I’ll run through the thought process behind using these ones.

I have somehow acquired a daft number of axle stands. I have some pairs in this style rated at 2 tonne a pair, I have some pairs in this style rated at 3 tonne a pair. I also have some of the style you linked to, albeit 1 tonne per stand, which are my go-to set. I then have the ones shown in my posts with the disco, which I rarely use because they are enormous and a pain in the arse to get under anything.

My go-to set were no use, as to lift the Disco past the rear suspension articulation meant that the stand was at full extension, making it less stable than I would be comfortable clambering under.

As you say, the two tonne pair aren’t even a contender - you just look at the fuckers and they bend. I’ve probably bent two or three of them over the years on much smaller cars!

The big bastards then; whilst I have no idea of their rating, they’re made of thicker metal than any other set I have, approximately 5mm. They’re also made of angle which has been cut and bent to shape, which I reckon is stronger than the curved leg ones.

The tube inside is much the same; huge compared to the smaller set. It also has spider webs reinforcing it.

The saddle is a piece of angle that’s about 7mm thick and wide enough to swallow pretty much and chassis leg and not let it slip out.

Did I mention that they’re huge? 😅

I did think about the weight of the Land Rover too; mine has a kerb weight of about 2,400kg and a max permissible rear axle weight of 1,900kg.

With this in mind, I was confident I was putting less than 2 tones on the stands as a pair, whilst also being confident that that stands are good for well over that weight - I suspect they’re the strongest stands I own, and they’re the ones I normally use on 4x4s.

For belt and braces, I did what I always do for safety - I left the 3 tonne jack with the saddle under the diff as a third contact point, and I rocked the fuck out of the disco before going under it, same as I do on anything I put on stands. If I can’t push it off the stands by trying then I reckon it’s as safe as it is getting. The wheels then went under the sills, just in case everything still went wrong.

I will add that this long answer isn’t a pop at you, more that I’d be mortified if someone saw my post and thought that you could use smaller kit to lift it, then harmed themselves! Even knowing that it was probably ok, I still did my best to minimise the work I did under it, and if I was under it to then try and position myself out the way of the worst crush points should it fall.

I did also did just pop both of the big stands on a flat surface just to check if they’d bent and I’d not spotted it - they’re both ok! 🙂

It just goes to show you how a picture can distort the scale of stuff and make them appear smaller (either that or the Disco is absolutely huge!). Those axle stands do indeed comfortably look like Forth Bridge parapets in your photo there. 

As you were!

[Rust Collector]

18 hours ago, Split_Pin said:

either that or the Disco is absolutely huge!

I think it’s this probably 😅 those are 21” wheels on it, and I don’t feel like they look ‘big’ in comparison to the body.

[Rust Collector]

I’m today’s episode of ‘I can’t fucking believe it’:

That was a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. I actually booked the test today when I woke up, for a test station two hours away that had a time slot.

As the drive progressed, I gradually convinced myself that I’d get a ‘do not drive’ fail, and be stuck a long way from home, two days before I leave the country for a week and a half. I felt a bit sick and weepy at that thought.

To make matters worse, the Clio broke yesterday, and we were meant to be getting a lift to the airport in it (the friend who was driving us has also had her car break down).

So this pass is an incredibly welcome development!

[Tickman]

This is outstanding news.
Well deserved with the effort put in.
Enjoy the holiday and then get on with the next in line

 

[Christine]

On 06/08/2025 at 19:56, Rust Collector said:

If/when you do come to sell it then do give me a nudge. If I’m in a position to buy it then I expect I’d have it back 😅

Ive just been to Tesco in the   clio  ..She's on 131,000 !  

 

Today it got a new gearknob too .