The grumpy thread

[STUNO]

I've never heard of Hester Blumenthal never even seen a Little Chef never driven over the Tay bridge and never been to DundeeHave I missed something?

[pogweasel]

I've never heard of Hester Blumenthal never even seen a Little Chef never driven over the Tay bridge and never been to DundeeHave I missed something?

Not really, no.Blumenthal, whilst irritatingly smug and over-exposed was pretty class on that telly programme where he made bonkers food, exploding jelly and apples made out of meat and gravy etc.

[Richard]

Yeah, but you wouldn't pay to eat one of his creations, would you?

 

Here is a mentalist who decided to try a Blumenthal recipe. The anticlimax when his wife tastes it is comedy gold.

 

 

The same guy has videos of his shite Bentley on Youtube too. Maybe we should invite him.

[Guest]

Right I'm pissed off now.The stupid bint who bid my Creamfields ticket up to £165 has not got in touch. The fucking event starts at 2 and she lives in Port Talbot. And the gig is in Halton.WHY DO I ALWAYS GET FUCKED AROUND WITH EBAY???????????

[Pillock]

Have you got her address? Go and collect the cash.It's probably going to knock a chunk out of your £165 in petrol but retards who think clicking 'bid' is just a 'i might want this, get back to me when it's finished' button need scaring. By four burly blokes turning up at 2am to collect cash.

[j-j]

In busy crap park today finally find a space and there's this tool standing right in the space. He says, 'I'm waiting on someone' and I'm like "eh?" and he says "isn't it obvious"? - Eh? "isn't WHAT obvious"?? Anyway, there's another TWO spaces one is a single car space along and the other adjacent that (weird cluster of freeness tbh) so I swing past and reverse into the next one - no biggie. The whole time I watch him watching my every manoeuvre like I'm about to reverse into the space he's parked his lanky self in. Was considering a Tianamen square response but there were TWO whole other spaces. By the time I have my shit out the car his relatives or whatever have got their precious space. I (quite immaturely) walked past him closely to which he made great efforts not to make eye contact - poof. Was gunna smack him but that's not becoming is it But who do these types think they are? why does their ugly korean MPV thing deserve that space so much more than anyone else? Is it because it was a whole 3 meters closer to the shops than the other space? Sadly that's the reason I feel is the one that made that space so much more precious..Actually, that crap park is fuggin terrible - it's at a big edge of city shopping complex with all the usual shite names like Next and starbux etc it's called Glasgow Fort and it's shite. For some reason they chose to clad the outside in Titanium - nobody knows why. Fuggun hate these places but it's on my way back home and has a Subway so I had to visit today (not had a sub for yonks) - it's a crap park with millions of wasted spaces where pavement is built up to end the rows for no seemingly useful reason. There are always mongs who've parked their shit 2 wheels up on the end bits (even when there are spaces in the actual bit) just because they're closer to the shops. Even on a tiny bit where the yellow lines stop for like 2.5 m you'll find a shit 3 door with peedo proof blacked out rear windows there as it's closer. Fuggin hate people.Anyway, If there had not been 2 other spaces - the tool would have got PWNED by the front end of a shite shitroen. I would have used the ear splitting air horns first to warn of course Has not ruined my day.

[Guest]

Have you got her address? Go and collect the cash.It's probably going to knock a chunk out of your £165 in petrol but retards who think clicking 'bid' is just a 'i might want this, get back to me when it's finished' button need scaring. By four burly blokes turning up at 2am to collect cash.

I do have her address, yes. Got a phone number but helpfully it's 'out of service' so I can't go and scream at her down the phone for wasting my day.I can't be arsed driving to Port Talbot. It's a five hour drive and I have to meet the other bloke who paid straight away at 6 for the Sunday ticket I've got.Fuck it, I'm going to sell the damn thing to a lad at work. He won't offer me what it's gone for but I'm not losing out completely.Can I not flame her for being a little shit? I had people begging me to end the auction early last night!

[pogweasel]

At least bosh up her ebay ident, that way you know that the next ten or so items she sells will all have 'ghost' bidders who dish out a fat neg...

[Guest]

At least bosh up her ebay ident, that way you know that the next ten or so items she sells will all have 'ghost' bidders who dish out a fat neg...

What, here?2606natashaStupid cunt.

[Pillock]

And her phone number and address. Cos when the takeaway/adult escort gets ordered to her house they'll want a phone number if they can't find the place.

[Guest]

I've offered the ticket out to everyone else who bid on it. Nothing.

 

I am officially FUCKING FURIOUS now. Ebay won't do a damned thing, she won't get in touch and I've been cheated out of selling the ticket elsewhere.

 

Can I get her suspended for taking the piss?

[Mr Lobster]

Can I get her suspended for taking the piss?

Sadly not. So you need to get revenge in many many other ways :twisted:Still, at least we know she does sell stuff on ebay from time to time so at least a bit of internet justice can be dished out.

[Minimad5]

We should just make bogus ebay usernames and spam that bitch

[Pillock]

She surely can't have a PAYG phone for every time she bids on something, throwing the SIM away every time she upsets someone.... that sucker will be back on soon. Try it about 5.30am on bank holiday Monday morning.

[Guest]

Lying twat car sellers....Did a 120 mile round trip today for my step son. We went to look at a Mini cooper-new shape type on the basis of the sellers advert/questions answered on the phone. The beautifull 27.000mile car had been resprayed in patches by a colour blind gimp and MR Magoo in a force nine gale having watered the paint down with their own piss by the look of it!!. Random plastics on the car and in the engine bay had been fibreglassed together poorly. The drivers seat was shagged-in 27.000 miles? Thats before you get to the missing service history and logbook that was there an hour and a half before . Missing caps off the alloy wheels/various dents/bust lights made me wonder if it was the right car as its not the minter advertised/described on the phone A call made by me found it was cat d too!!Bloody bearded bas*ard time waster.....

[michiel]

'Find out who you were in a previous life - text IMATAWATINTHISLIFE to 1234' 'How gay are you - text HANDBAG_YOURNAME to 1234''How long will your relationship last - text relation_on_yourname_othername to 1234''Baby name generator - text MYKIDWILLBEATWATANYWAY to 1234'Etc. etc... who comes up with this shit, and who falls for it at 4,50 euro per 'item', 3 items a week... do they have this bullshit in the UK too? I don't know what pisses me off more, the fact that someone offers these insane 'services' or the fact that there's apparently a market for it.

[Guest]

Yes, you can't watch a music channel for longer than 10 minutes without something like that coming on. It used to annoy me, but when I realised that stupid people were being deprived of their money, I decided to give it all my full support.The most ingenious one I heard of was "turn your mobile phone into a torch", you basically paid £3 or so for a white screen. Brilliant!

[michiel]

That's a good way to look at it... I think I still refuse(d) to believe how stoopid the general public is.

[chester drawers]

Have you got her address? Go and collect the cash.It's probably going to knock a chunk out of your £165 in petrol but retards who think clicking 'bid' is just a 'i might want this, get back to me when it's finished' button need scaring. By four burly blokes turning up at 2am to collect cash.

I do have her address, yes. Got a phone number but helpfully it's 'out of service' so I can't go and scream at her down the phone for wasting my day.

Submit whatever contact details you have to as many dubious religious organizations as you can: Scientologists, local Alpha Course etc. The persistence of such folk knows no bounds

[Guest]

Idiot bitch has got in touch, and this is brilliant. I was expecting her goldfish to have died or Vishnu to have smited her from getting out of the wrong side of the womb, but oh no:

I don't appreciate you sending me abuse, my brother was bidding for the tickets on my account and didn't realise what he was doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I responded in kind:

I don't appreciate you pissing me around, but there's nothing we can do about that now is there? Nice one.So that excuses what happened does it? Believe me, if you think that's abuse you got off bloody lightly. Because of you, I waited in all morning and subsequently couldn't sell the ticket on, as I was waiting FOR YOU to respond. I suggest next time you tell your brother to get his own sodding eBay account if he wants to idly bid without following purchases up. You're lucky eBay doesn't allow negative feeback any more, because you'd be knackered about now.I was hoping you'd apologise for doing me out of £165, but as that isn't going to happen (since you think I'm giving you abuse, Christ knows why I might be angry at you) we'll just have to sack it off and I'll report you to ebay for wasting my time.Could you not have just got in touch with me yesterday morning and said you didn't want them? I might have stood a chance of getting a second chance offer from the next highest bidder. That would have been the courteous thing to do.Anyway, it's done now and yet again I'm left with a shitty taste in my mouth from dealing with idiots on eBay. If you don't understand why I'm annoyed then you and your brother should stay off online auctions.PS: Nice trick with the phone by the way, it must be great not having to deal with the outside world when you fuck things up.

What a fucking arseache.And it goes on.

What you on about nice trick with the phone????????????????????????? Your wasting my time now sending me these messages, please leave me alone, Creamfields has passed now so get over it, and by the way my brother had a fab time!!!!!!!hide

So as a parting shot.......

Let's see smart arse. You posted a number up to contact that didn't accept oncoming calls. Hence, a nice trick. You don't have deal with any problems because no one can get in touch with you. It's quite a good one that, I must try it.Just out of interest (because I've had a pop now, and I've said all I want to say) why did you let your brother bid on your account knowing full well he wasn't going to pay? If my brother did that, I'd brain the little shit.Creamfields was good on the Saturday wasn't it? I got in for free because I know the bloke who owns the land, and a geet laugh for five hours or so. It's the best way to get over some time wasting prat who has no idea what he's doing.The reason I was pissed off with you (and I really can't believe you don't get this) is that you didn't fess up and contact me (say at about 8.30 on the Saturday) that your brother had fucked up and didn't want the ticket. Why couldn't you have done that? It would have taken you what, 5, 10 minutes, and everyone would have known where they stood. A misunderstanding, but that's it. Why wait? Obviously you've got no fucking manners, but that goes with the territory I suppose.By the way, the notion of ME wasting YOUR time is fucking hilarious, the irony! I like to give things back.Have a good one and that, just stay away from my auctions unless you're actually going to buy something (I won't bore you about a bid being a binding contract, there's too many big words you wouldn't understand).That's it, I won't bother you again.

[outlaw118]

Vets, or rather the price of them.Took my catten (in between a cat and kitten) to the "weekend partner" vet yesterday 'cos he was under the weather (obviously).I left 10 minutes later, having paid £135 for the privelidge - and they've done next to fuck all for it. The consultation itself was £50+vat, and the rest was a blood test, split into two parts, one charge for taking it and another for analysis!! X-ray - to be done "later" was £40 odd!!They've kept the little bugger in as well, so I'll be re-mortgaging the house on Tuesday....I realise that these people are skilled etc, but really!!They had two vets working, and each appointment was 10 minutes, so that works out £600 an hour, just on "consultations".I wish I'd worked harder at school.

[garethj]

Car parks, or actually the people in them.Not the usual rant about parking in disabled spaces or parent & child ones, but I'm amazed at how fast some people drive in car parks. For my sins I'm occasionally in the supermarket carpark or the local retail park and some people are up to third gear in there Taking young kids shopping is a bit like herding cats and of course it's my responsibility as parent to keep them under control; I'm fine with this. However I wouldn't mind a bit more understanding from the mouthbreathers who think that just because they've queued up in Argos for 3 minutes they need to make that time back crossing the carpark so they can join the next traffic queue. Hint: crossing the carpark at 25mph instead of 10mph saves you maybe 10 seconds. Stop dithering in front of the Elizabeth Duke section and get the time back that way

[Pillock]

Outlaw, get a new vet mate...My vet charges about £22 for a consultation with no medicines so you're paying well over the odds. I think the other stuff is closer priced, but we've had a few bills that were lower than we expected. Just after Christmas one of our pups had gastroenterwotsit which was a trip to the vets every other day, lots of medicines culminating in her being opened up for a poke around when the x-ray and ultrasound didn't show anything. Weirdly, rearranging her insides sorted it. Total bill was £700 which was probably 8-10 visits, 3-4 blood tests, one overnight stay, the x-rays and ultrasounds, and the operation.Our 20 week old terrier is actually just being bundled off to the vets with SWMBO whilst I, erm, surf autoshite. He's got a bit of a wonky leg. They don't charge more for a bank holiday sunday consultation though

[Cavcraft]

A bit random but tarty bints who fancy themselves. Like when I was trying to play pool last night in the boozer and some scrubber was trying to put us off by bending over the table and sort of squashing her chest up and trying to pout.Now normally I wouldn't mind but she was fucking full of it and loved herself and I H8 COCKIE SLUTZ.The attention craving tart soon pissed off when we ignored her though.

[Albert Ross]

Drivers of newish shiny Audis/Mercs etc......when on narrow lanes between Langsett and Lady Bower in the peaks, and there's a Land Rover coming uphill towards you, with it's headlamps on, at 10mph in 1st gear due to the 3/4 ton of kit in the back, try pulling into the side a bit further, or indeed wait at the WIDEST point in the road for me to pass you, that way I wont narrowly miss your "only 24 more payments remaining" ex-fleet pseudo-exec heap and force your ugly wife to try to climb out the passenger side as I approach, all black smoky and noise......Honestly. The same sort of thing goes to yellow Porsche 911 "drivers" on the same stretch of road. The next corner you go round sideways near Strines might be your last. I bet you never expected to see my Land Rover on the road did you? Just imagine if I had been a sheep, or a human being............Next time, slow down, and concentrate lad! The look on your face was a picture. Do you have extra Persil at home for your Mum to wash your pants?

[Guest]

People who don't obey the speed limits, but both ways. They'll sit at 40 in a 30, but when it opens into a 60 they'll continue sitting there at 40. Strangely, I would say 90% of the time it is middle-aged women in intermediate-sized faux-executive hatchbacks (A3, Golf MK4 onwards, Stilo, 308). Just an observation, I don't know why.I just don't understand it - the people who speed everywhere aren't a problem, I just let them past and they're gone. The people who dawdle everywhere I can just drop a gear and overtake at a suitable time, they don't tend to have a problem with that.However, the "40 everywhere" driver will be furious if I have the nerve to put my indicator on and get past them when it opens into a 60 - God knows why. If someone's going faster than you, what's the problem? I'd rather they be in front of me than behind, then they'll be less liable to crash into me.The most frustrating situation is when you're with one of these fools through a section where the speed limit alternates between 30/60 due to empty roads broken up by the occasional residential area. If you're behind them, you can watch them disappear off into the distance through the residential areas, then it opens back into the 60 and you're right back behind them again, dawdling through a nice easy stretch of road. Manage to get in front of them and you'll watch them disappear in the rear view mirror, only to see their piggy-eyed faces as they tailgate you in the 30 zone, angry because you had the nerve to overtake them whilst they do 40 on a road where you could do double that in a Dacia Denem on Stomils. They will never try to overtake you, though.

[Pete-M]

Drivers of newish shiny Audis/Mercs etc......when on narrow lanes between Langsett and Lady Bower in the peaks, and there's a Land Rover coming uphill towards you, with it's headlamps on, at 10mph in 1st gear due to the 3/4 ton of kit in the back, try pulling into the side a bit further, or indeed wait at the WIDEST point in the road for me to pass you, that way I wont narrowly miss your "only 24 more payments remaining" ex-fleet pseudo-exec heap and force your ugly wife to try to climb out the passenger side as I approach, all black smoky and noise......Honestly.

Reading this, I don't think it's entirely the other drivers responsibility to cater for a Landy trying to do 10 mph uphill. Yeah, move over and give you some space, fair enough, no complaints with that, but 10 mph uphill is no less of a pain in the arse than most of the things this thread is about.I'd be properly pissed off if I was stuck behind a 10 mph Landy, and I like Land Rovers.

The same sort of thing goes to yellow Porsche 911 "drivers" on the same stretch of road. The next corner you go round sideways near Strines might be your last. I bet you never expected to see my Land Rover on the road did you? Just imagine if I had been a sheep, or a human being............Next time, slow down, and concentrate lad! The look on your face was a picture. Do you have extra Persil at home for your Mum to wash your pants?

Oh dear. The fun police are out again...

[Cavcraft]

Good point about the 'same speed' dickheads, though the ones that really piss me off are the tossers doing 48mph in a 60 zone who then continue doing the same speed through 40 and 30mph zones.

[pogweasel]

DIY. Or more likely the fricking stupid useless bastard instructions the give out with stuff. She says 'oh just put this light fitting up before doing your other jobs', which is always a bad omen, as any job expected to take 5 minutes will take several hours. If I'd followed the instructions either I'd have got quite a shock, or the fitting would have fizzed popped and grenaded, or it just woukdn't have worked at all, which would probably be more irritating. You don't need an electrician in to do these jobs, just instructions that aren't clearly bollocks. And after all that I find that the bulbs required seem to be made of unobtanium. "I bet you got this in the sale...." I say to her. Guess what, she did. Oh well. Creosote the shed this afternoon. Nothing can possibly go wrong with that. Can it????

[Guest]

Oh well. Creosote the shed this afternoon. Nothing can possibly go wrong with that. Can it????