People Who Think They Know About Cars

[Pillock]

The sprinter in question was a knackered, non-turbo, LWB dog of a van. It was the one they rented people like me - mid 20s and turned up at the hire place on a pushbike. It had rusty everything, knackered seats, smelt faintly of fish and the load area looked like someone had hosted Glastonbury in there with free vodka, drugs and hammers to every visitor. The condition form on the documentation basically is one big squiggle which means "we know it's ratty, just bring it back in one piece".BUT, it was roadworthy (I know the guy that sorts the vans, he's a strict MoT tester and an old-school mechanic), it was super-cheap, and when empty it would still step the back end out.As a bonus, the girl that runs the hire department of the garage used to work in a local bar with a friend of mine. She has huuuge hooters, and once posed nekked for a jazz mag. She could have got me to sign anything, since my eyes had glazed over with the memories of a A4 closeup of her clunge.I rarely rent from anywhere else.

[Cavcraft]

/\Pictures or it didn't happen.

[Pillock]

Naaah I never owned the publication. There was a communual copy in the staff loo at the pub however! Not sure it'd be flexible enough to go through a scanner though.Erm, I can give you the address of the hire place. Pop in and have a look. You really, really can't miss her.

[AXrescuer]

I used to love listening to my mates bragging about how their Yamaha FS1Eswould do over 70 cos they'd added ace bars, expansion pipes and 'trick' sprockets!Strangely though, none of them could ever keep up with my trusty Fantic Caballero!

[Guest]

Yes, I've been told more than once that my Amazon is FWD and has a two stroke.Also:'My mate says that's American''My mate says that's a Packard''My mate says you can't get any bits for them'.

[Cavcraft]

I used to love listening to my mates bragging about how their Yamaha FS1Eswould do over 70 cos they'd added ace bars, expansion pipes and 'trick' sprockets!Strangely though, none of them could ever keep up with my trusty Fantic Caballero!

AP50s did 70 as well didn't they ? I do recall the old trick at the time was lobbing C90 engines into SS50s as they went straight in but the Italian stuff was shunned by people who were blinded by the Japs.Extra shite points if you post pictures of a Garelli Record or Tiger!

[mattblack]

I've been in a 2.9 Granada when it was reading a 138 on the speedo, apparently it was still accelerating when it had to slow down. Knowing Ford speedometers it was probably around 125 true speed.

There are those electronic signs popping up everywhere now that tell you how fast you are going. I have been calibrating my speedo to them, and whilst i do not know how accurate they are they are all giving the same reading that my car is showing 35, but they are showing 28 which is waay out.

 

 

I am told that GPS is meant to be a more accurate indication of your speed too? Never had one, but might be interesting to get for when i am in the bloody average speed cameras on the M1.

You're allowed 10% error on the speedo, and they are always 'fast'...

[nigel bickle]

I had a 1970 Suzuki AS 50 in my pack of 'shite a few years back-promised it to my 16 yr old son, once he rode his (tuned) Puch Maxi safely enough/responsibly. 6 months in ,and past the initial lunacy; I decided to retrieve it from the barn ,ride it home, sort & prepare,as a further 'ggod riding'incentive..I swear I was doing 60+ (speedo reading 70+)-when I rounded a bend to find a sheep blocking the road, amiably glancing coyly at me.My own bikes-yank the large disc brakes on -no issue; but this thing had a drum the size of a small saucer. Not a chance,and no way around.I tipped the bloody thing on its side, glanced of its ample rump (-it bleated, and jumped back thru the fence) finally ending up deep in the brambles with a rather nasty case of gravel rash down one side.Rode it home gingerly -stuck it in the garage-licked my wounds. whilst the family sniggered.Fast? Certainly-but the chassis,suspension & brakes were woeful.Too dangerous for my kids.

[Gompo]

I once got the Metro 1.0 that Mrs A had some years back up to an indicated 95ish on a downhill stretch of the M6. I say ish because it vibrated so much that the speedo was a blur and the radio shook loose, fell off and clouted me on the ankle

I think I saw an indicated 95 in my Mum's old 1.0 Metro, although could have been 90. Of course downhill and was struggling.. no trim fell off and no injuries caused though!

[Pete-M]

I had my mums old 900cc Mk1 Polo up to an indicated 100 once.It never managed it again.

[Guest]

I had my mums old 900cc Mk1 Polo up to an indicated 100 once.It never managed it again.

I've had an indicated 110 out of my Amazon.Which is about, ooh, 85?

[Pete-M]

I had my mums old 900cc Mk1 Polo up to an indicated 100 once.It never managed it again.

I've had an indicated 110 out of my Amazon.Which is about, ooh, 85?

Probably. The Amazon is a lot more likely to be ok up there than that poor old Polo though... it really didn't sound well..

[Milford Cubicle]

It was reasonably easy to wind my Polo up to beyond the end of the 100MPH marker. It had the 'big block' 55bhp 1.3 though.

[AXrescuer]

I used to love listening to my mates bragging about how their Yamaha FS1Es

would do over 70 cos they'd added ace bars, expansion pipes and 'trick' sprockets!

 

Strangely though, none of them could ever keep up with my trusty Fantic Caballero!

AP50s did 70 as well didn't they ? I do recall the old trick at the time was lobbing C90 engines into SS50s as they went straight in but the Italian stuff was shunned by people who were blinded by the Japs.

Extra shite points if you post pictures of a Garelli Record or Tiger!

 

And a Caballero!

 

 

[155V6]

My AP50 only did about 50,so I thought it would be a good idea to fit a big bore kit.If I'd run it in,maybe it would of lasted more than a couple of days

[Cavcraft]

MR AX you're a bloody legend sir, cheers. Takes me right back that does and I love that Record!

[AXrescuer]

Aye, me too!

 

In my day there were those who had mere mopeds and then there was the rest of us who had kwalitee Italian hardware!

 

My mate John had one of these, do you remember them?

Malaguti Olympique.

 

[gtd2000]

Top speed lies are ace. Don't know how many on here are a similar age to me but when I was in the last year at school everyone knew someone who had a FSIE that would 86mph on a flat road 'because it had a Micron and drops'

Mine did 56mph down a big fucking hill (with the head on the clocks) and up to 45mph on the flat - until I shattered the piston