The "What's broken on my Alfa" thread...

[dollywobbler]

Thanks Chris. I have got rot in the rear of the sill/wheelarch area - bit annoyed at myself for not spotting that when I test drove the car (my mistake was starting the engine... ) but I've got a tame welder who can hopefully put that right when needed. Will probably get it done before the winter - MoT not a concern until March.

 

Forgot to mention - I've got all but one of the electric seat motors working now, having read on www.alfaowner.com that tapping them with something often worked! Now, apart from passenger seat height, the only non-working item is the electric mirrors, which are fortunately how I want them anyway. Suspect the switch here.

[dollywobbler]

Got to love Alfas. Got the thermostat done and decided to test it with a trip to the Cotswolds. Seemed to be going well but on the way back, the central locking packed up. That was ok - quick fuse change and I was away (though the fusebox diagram is in Italian, so you need the handbook to work it out...)But then, on the A43, I just felt like something was amiss. So I stuck to only 70mph. Then the low pads light came on. Pulled over - RH front wheel was untouchably hot. Serious scorchio. Limped back home (keeping the speed down kept the heat down) and now I'm wondering what's up - caliper or hose?Oh, the low screenwash lamp lit up too. How good is that? I'm off to top it up now, because that's easy to fix!

[nigel bickle]

Aaahh.I'd forgotten the joys of Alfa ownership-always something exciting to ''attend'' too.

[dollywobbler]

To be honest, as a Citroen owner, I'm quite used to it. Similarly, I think the plus points are worth the odd bit of tinkering. Already I love this car like it's been mine for years. The Subaru, ruthlessly efficient workhorse that it is, I care not a jot about, which is why it's for sale.Just jacked up the suspect corner and the wheel was spinning merrily until I hit the brake pedal - whereupon it became very definitely less happy to spin. As it seems to fix itself after a bit, I'm suspecting a collapsing brake hose flexi. Well, I'm pinning my hopes to that thought anyway!

[dollywobbler]

Bah! Garage took everything apart, checked everything was ok and put it all back together. Result? Still seems to be doing it! Took it for an almighty thrash on the way home and the end result is I no longer give a shit. What a car! ALL the brakes were warm by the time I got home, so I don't think the problem is as bad as it was.In other news, the speedometer continues to go on strike with rather more regularity, the exhaust system has been classed by my garage as "a shit bodge" and the climate control occasionally keeps rebooting itself...I'm not sure I can live with the ups and downs for that much longer, but by heck the good times are good!

[nigel bickle]

This will probably settle down to be 'just quirky'.They do seem to improve with enthusiastic use

[dollywobbler]

Right - more enthusiastic treatment it'll be then! What a shame. I'll just have to listen to that V6 sing some more. It's almost laughably quirky, but as long as she keeps going, I guess I shouldn't complain too much. Besides, I got my first Alfa wave today!

[Negative Creep]

I had a 155Q4 (very rare beast indeed) for a year and in that time replaced the front tyres, battery, clutch slave cylinder and the clutch was just starting to go when I sold it. Ok I did get occasional phantom warning lights, but all in all was no more or less reliable than other cars I've owned. Plus you could never tire of listening to that engine, and telling people you own an Alfa!

[dollywobbler]

To be honest, the main reason the Rover's going to is to provide an 'Alfa repairs' fund! Sadly, the Rover hasn't gone, and already I've managed to lumber myself with a cheap E34 BMW. Oh and the Subaru's still here too.Fiddlesticks.

[MrRegieRitmo]

I'm not sure I can live with the ups and downs for that much longer, but by heck the good times are good!

How familiar this sentence sounds to me! Was in the same boat with my 146 in 07/08. Still got it festering away, gonna have to do something with it soon.Love the 164, I remember when they came out in the late 80s, we got our cool Sierra Sapphire 2.0 GLS & I admired the BMW 5 & 7 Series' of the time, the E34 & the E32 but there was a girl in my school a year or two above who always got dropped off in a silver 164 & I remember thinking what a posh, stylish car it was & what totty she was because of it!

[dollywobbler]

Oh dear. I remember a girl getting dropped off in a bright red Porsche 911SC Targa, but what I remember more clearly is one of my mates getting dropped off in his Mum's gorgeous metallic bronze Fiat Strada! Even then, my mind was corrupted towards shite.

[MrRegieRitmo]

This could be a whole new thread! Cars that have stuck in our heads from school days! A boy in my year at infants school used to get dropped off in a blue Fiat 131 Supermirafiori panorama estate which at the time I thought was a 'bit naff' and it was certainly a few years old by then. Would think it was the bee's knees now! There was someone else whose gran or nan would pick them up in a blue Hillman Avenger saloon, think it would sometimes be a blue MkI Polo too unless that was a different family?!

[Volksy]

This could be a whole new thread!

Yus, stop changing the title!only cos I iz sad and read through all...

[dollywobbler]

Yup, something else has broken!Turned up at the Retro Rides East Anglia meet last night, looking all cool and impressive (like I always do, obviously) right up to the moment that I tried getting out - and the door release mechanism snapped, trapping me inside. I think I know what I'll be doing this weekend...Oh and it seems to be running too rich. And there's a wheel wobble at speed.On the positive side of things, crikey it sounds nice!

[Father Ted]

@ mental picture of doing mime artist in a glass box routine trapped inside Alfa....

[Spottedlaurel]

On the positive side of things, crikey it sounds nice!

It certainly did! Heard it before I saw it come onto the field, wasn't what I was expecting - sounded a bit meatier than I'd have thought.

[dollywobbler]

It's running a little badly and the exhaust is a complete travesty (I have no idea what the back box is off, it's certainly not a 164!) but I think that lends it a very distinguished burble. Sadly, you can't hear it so well inside. It's supremely quiet.

[dollywobbler]

Well, found the problem with the door handle. The bit that levers the , er, other lever has snapped. Looks like you have to either replace the entire armrest, or cut the existing one and try to hide the damage...I've got an autoshite solution though. I'll leave the armrest off and I can manually push the door release lever myself!So tempting to book this car in for the simply enormous amount of work it probably needs, but I'm having so much fun trying to run it on zero pounds. There are far better examples out there. But can I bring myself to neglect an Alfa?

[Guest]

But can I bring myself to neglect an Alfa?

Yes-on the basis that 75% of older Alfa owners seem to

[dollywobbler]

Excellent. In that case, I'm going to bodge up the door handle. Shouldn't be too tricky.

[dollywobbler]

I am so loving my bodge! Tried cable ties and wires = FAIL so had a rummage around the garage to see what I could find.Managed to fix the door handle using a spare (I hope...) 2CV shock absorber bush! Fits perfectly in the slot and bingo! I can open the driver's door again!Also had a play with contact cleaner. That seemed to make the engine run better (after going over several plugs under the bonnet) and I almost got the electric mirrors to work (well, one moved. Very slightly. Better than before!).

[dollywobbler]

When does characterful foible turn into fucking useless piece of shit? The battery appears to have died completely now. Great. Perhaps I'd better keep the Subaru after all...

[AlsoMike]

The battery appears to have died completely now. Great.

The car sensed that you were attempting to fix electrical issues and has sabotaged you.

[dollywobbler]

Yes. It's an absolute fucker that car! (I think I still like it though...)Have been away (in the sodding uncomfortable Subaru) so not had chance to do 'owt. Might just go and see if it's still dead...

[dollywobbler]

I may have to change the title of this thread. I've been busy with the contact cleaner. Ripped out the instrument binnacle to try and fix the intermittent speedo. No joy at all but yesterday, having pinched the battery off the Beemer (that was handy...) to solve that issue, I pulled all the ECU contacts out, blasted them with chemicals, waited for things to dry out and plugged it all back in.I did think I'd created a new problem - the air con kept cutting out and rebooting itself - but after a run, everything seems fine. I'm sure it's running a bit better and, for now at least, the speedo seems to be working...Incidentally, the dead battery was very low on fluid. Topped it up, put it on the Beemer, jumped it into life and left in running for about ten minutes but I think it's too late. The battery instantly lost charge.And yes, I have checked the levels on the battery now fitted to the Alfa!

[dollywobbler]

It's for sale! Get your shite Alfa here for a mere £475 - or exactly what I paid for it. Buy now and you can take over this thread for free!

 

Aircon is working perfectly now (and is lovely and cold) and the past three journeys have been completely with almost nothing going wrong! However, the front right brake is binding again. Not sure if it's the hose or what but needs looking at.

 

[dollywobbler]

Oh fucking donkey flanges!!Stupid me decided he'd try and investigate the brake issue. Mistake. All I have to show for my hard work is a nicely rounded bleed nipple. Fucking hoorah. I still reckon it's the flexi-pipe but now I don't really care.Is it wrong of me to want to banger race it? Is it even more wrong of me to think "hmmm, that's £2k off a Kia Picanto..."

[dollywobbler]

Meh. It's sitting in the garage where I can't see it. By tomorrow, I'm sure I'll be in love with it again.

[Guest]

It's for sale!

Good. Go through your own little black book looking for either BBC or J clarkson/J may/R hammond. Give them a call to see if they need to drop a piano/cross the deserts/Tow it to a car show*

* delete as required

[Volksy]

Give them a call to see if they need to drop a piano/cross the deserts/Tow it to a car show** delete as required

You missed - Attach half of it to a Saab... Cos that was hilarious...