I couldn't buy that........

[Tamworthbay]

I think it's a bit sad that some people just look at a badge, I wasn't after another 'all ...... are crap' thread but more a look into what aspects of designs bug you for one reason or another.

 

I have owned cars from a massive range of makers and three of my present four are from makers I have never owned before. I can alsways find something I like about any car and most cars have some little niggle you would like to remove.

[overrun]

I don't just look at badges. I'll own owt if it interests me. See the Wanted part of my sig for the ultimate in 4x4 no fucks given.

[DVee8]

Electric Handbrakes I despise and fear in equal measure.

 

That's already been mentioned, so have my other one.

 

Stop-Start.

 

I just don't trust it.

I have had mine with an electric handbrake for 3 weeks and i still can't get my head round it..Foot on the foot brake,press the hand brake button,2 seconds to move your foot  from foot brake to accelarator find the bite point and balance the car.

  Now this is ok on the flat but my drive is on a slope.

I can also just press the foot brake,not touch the hand brake button/switch and drive off.

 

As for stop/start their is so many perameters stopping it from working,the moons need to be in alignment.If it is too cold it won't work,rear screen demister on it won't work.

[Tamworthbay]

The thing that bugs me about the electronic parking brake is it was solving a problem that probably only affected 0.0001% of all drivers. I am a big advocate of helping the disabled but surely having it as an option for the one in a million that needs it rather than lumber all of us with it would be better. Not that I think it was introduced to help the disabled. I bet some muppet somewhere was thinking 'what can we do to make our car stand out?' And that was the best they could come up with.

 

Stop start I like though, I use it all the time on my wife's car. Take it out of gear, car stops, put it in car starts, Ecu makes sure it doesn't engage if the conditions would discharge the battery. Not sure where the problem is?

[AMC Rebel]

Foot operated handbrake such as Merc C180 especially when coupled with a manual gearbox on said 180, a brilliant low mileage rust free example but stop start traffic anywhere that had more than a 1 in 157 gradient felt like I was bloody walking!!

This always put me off manual XMs

[AMC Rebel]

Driving position. If the pedals don't line up with the steering wheel, then I'm not interested. Possible exception for the Citroen Ami.

Agreed - plenty of expensive German stuff couldn't even manage this (3-series, A4) last I knew - but they may have sorted it out now.

[Jim Bell]

Foot operated hand brake on autos. Put the handbrake where the clutch should be to thin out the number of manual drivers that unsuspectingly get in an auto.

[I_am_Diesel]

As I own two West German vehicles, one being diesel and a post 70's Ford I want nothing to do with this thread.

 

*Logs off and goes to hide and sulk

[John F]

Automatic gearboxes - I like driving, why on earth would I want to get rid of one the most satisfying aspects of it? Especially when bloody automatics seem to spend so much time hunting between gears, subjecting your ears to an incessant barrage of intrusive and unnecessary engine revs.

 

"Spacky" wipers - those happy clappy things that fold out from the centre towards the A pillars, usually found on bastard carriers but also on smaller vehicles e.g. Smart car. I wouldn't own a vehicle with them.

[Tamworthbay]

As I own two West German vehicles, one being diesel and a post 70's Ford I want nothing to do with this thread.

 

*Logs off and goes to hide and sulk

Two of my four are a 00s German and a 80s Ford, the two best cars I have ever had.

[richardthestag]

Seems like the electronic parking brake is a big fuck off to the manufacturers from what I read here. Simply a case of trying to be too clever.

 

Mrs thestag's Citroen tried to kill her just after she bought it. She was nervous of the brake and didn't really understand how it worked so one miserable morning she started it up to warm the car up. Had her foot on the footbrake and pressed the parking brake button to make sure it was on (mistake no1 unknown to us this is a dealer option to disengage the parking brake for service or recovery). Satisfied she then opened the door to get out and de-ice. Only the hill start assist gave her a full 5 seconds to get out before gravity took over. fortunately the door got wedged against the wall along side the car.

 

 

Boot print is from me giving it a kicking

 

Not very fucking happy, but it was a few years ago

 

Hill start assist fucking winds me up too. great while you are in the car and know about it, but stop and car stays still, get distracted for 5 seconds with the radio and the fucking thing is rolling backwards. False sense of security

 

So my list starts with Prius and ends with anything with Electronic parking brake.

 

Anything else I would roll in, even an Audi if only to prove that not all Audi drivers are complete asshats

[oldcars]

Anything with a wheel missing, oh hang on..................

[AMC Rebel]

Seems like the electronic parking brake is a big fuck off to the manufacturers from what I read here. Simply a case of trying to be too clever.

 

Mrs thestag's Citroen tried to kill her just after she bought it. She was nervous of the brake and didn't really understand how it worked so one miserable morning she started it up to warm the car up. Had her foot on the footbrake and pressed the parking brake button to make sure it was on (mistake no1 unknown to us this is a dealer option to disengage the parking brake for service or recovery). Satisfied she then opened the door to get out and de-ice. Only the hill start assist gave her a full 5 seconds to get out before gravity took over. fortunately the door got wedged against the wall along side the car.

 

 

My Ma is going to change her Citroen (identical to Mrs thestags) in the new year as despite multiple visits to Citroen and other dealers both here and in France, and plenty of pounds and euros spent, no-one can stop it from bleeping and flashing up an alarming message about the parking brake being fucked for more than about a week at a time.  The parking brake is working fine.

[AMC Rebel]

There a quite a few cars I wouldn't want just because I think they are ugly looking - but most are out of my price range anyway.

 

Porsche Cayenne, VW Toerag (same car anyway)

 

Mini Countryman (current iteration) - who the fuck signed that off? It's way uglier than an Allegro. 

 

BMW 6 series E63/E64 - I dislike the styling of almost all BMs but these are the ugliest

 

BMW Z4, X1, X3

[eddyramrod]

I'm glad someone thought of stop/start, there's an element that's right up there with the electronic handbrake in my Mistrust list!

 

Also, tyre profiles lower than 65% (and that grudgingly, I'd much rather have 75%).

 

I'm not very keen on remote central locking either.  I've got two cars with it, one works and the other doesn't.  On my little Rover, I can reach all the door buttons from my seat, which is good enough.  The Cadillac, however, despite only having two doors, has them so far apart that it's easiest just to use the key and walk round.  On the big Rover, the central locking works by putting the key in the door, but no longer from the fob; and the Chevy works from the fob as intended.  But for how long?

 

Three of my four current cars are FWD (and my work van).  I don't believe in it, certainly not in a car the size of the 75.

[Timewaster]

Anything with a wheel missing, oh hang on..................

You don't like motorbikes?

[stripped fred]

I quite like diesel engines for the torque and economy but not keen on the newer common rail ones with dpf's and injector problems. More to go wrong and soon wipe out any fuel savings. Also not a fan of dual mass flywheels, particularly when they need replacing!

[Cleon-Fonte]

 Not from me - I like a good V8, but not the Rover ones.  After all, if it was that good, why didn't Buick want it?

 

Admittedly there were casting issues early on, largely caused by aluminium engine building being a relatively new art at the time. But GM canning it was far more to do with other factors like pressure from the steel industry, and really there being no need for a compact, lightweight engine in booming post-war America where the big growth market was two tonne barges with engines twice the size. It certainly isn't a bad engine when in use, it just requires a relatively high amount of care and sympathy to guarantee a long life.

 

My contribution is the Audi understeertastic engine position, slung longitudinally way out ahead of the front axle. It was acceptable on the NSU Ro80 with its extremely light rotary unit, less so with a later diesel boat anchor. So peeved were Audi's engineers of the panning they received from motoring journalists about such handling characteristics that they put the engine well back on the A5, only for marketing to tell them to build in as much understeer as possible as, according to research, that's one of the features Audi owners most liked about their cars.

[Snipes]

She was nervous of the brake and didn't really understand how it worked.......

Got to say, she never should have been driving the car if she didn't know how the controls work.

 

Also pressing the foot brake and the p-brake pedal is the release method for most electronic p-brake systems.

[dollywobbler]

The Qashqai's electronic handbrake has seriously been doing my head in. You can't pull away as taught by your driving instructor, because the stupid thing will only release the brake if you have your foot on the pedal. Mix in the stop start and you are always the last to leave a set of traffic lights. It's active encouragement to ignore the handbrake and become one of those arse holes who just keeps their foot on the brake instead.

[Richard]

Got to say, she never should have been driving the car if she didn't know how the controls work.

Also pressing the foot brake and the p-brake pedal is the release method for most electronic p-brake systems.

But it's also the correct way to engage the handbrake on a mechanical system.

 

Hill Start Assist is a massive pain in the arse. I can't see how it's legal to have a brake that disengages without user intervention. I'm aware of it now but it gave me a bit of a fright the first time it happened in the van.

[richardthestag]

Got to say, she never should have been driving the car if she didn't know how the controls work.

 

Also pressing the foot brake and the p-brake pedal is the release method for most electronic p-brake systems.

 

Like Richard observed ^^^ every single car that doesnt have an electronic parking brake you apply the foot brake and then the hand brake.

 

Seems like the electronic brake release idea was designed by a scientist who had a chauffeur and thought, shit that is a great idea!

 

BTW good to know that there is someone out there who takes the time to thoroughly read through the user manual before proceeding in their new car/hire car/borrowed car

[Jazoli]

Do any of you electric handbrake users realise that if you just set off normally the handbrake disengages? It has done on every single new car I have driven and that's quite a few, that's how they are designed to work :confused:

 

Apply power, lift clutch, handbrake releases and off you go, don't tell me you haven't read the manual 😂

[RustyNuts]

Anything boring without toys. I'd rather get the bus.. at least you get a stop button to play with after watching the driver play with his ticketing machine.. lol

[richardthestag]

Do any of you electric handbrake users realise that if you just set off normally the handbrake disengages? It has done on every single new car I have driven and that's quite a few, that's how they are designed to work :confused:

 

Apply power, lift clutch, handbrake releases and off you go, don't tell me you haven't read the manual 😂

 

 

 

anyone else with electronic handbrake have issues getting it to disengage when reversing down a slight incline? The Citroen will actually stall sometimes rather than allow progress.

 

imho over complex solution replacing something that didnt need replacing.

[AMC Rebel]

My X350 Jaaag would release the electric handbrake automatically - but doing it like that seemed to wear out the pads even quicker, so I took to releasing it manually.

 

Those hill hold things where they release after a few seconds are gash - why, just why?  My 03 Scooby had a much better version - roll up to a stop, firm press on footbrake, foot off (fnarr) and wait as long as you needed with the clutch down, it "unstuck" itself when you let the clutch up.

[Cleon-Fonte]

On modern Peugeots it seems to be a bit of a lottery whether the electronic handbrake automatically releases or not, and with the process for manually releasing it being unfathomably complex pulling away from a busy set of traffic lights has never been so much fun*.

[xtriple]

The BGBM has an electric handbrake, it does automatically release when it's put in drive, but you can't put the handbrake on until it's stopped and in park. It has an 'emergency brake pedal' which works the handbrake but acts exactly like a brake pedal and is just for if all the brakes fail (three separate systems with two calipers on each front disc so not likely!) and will not stay on. It also has hill hold, why? I have two pedals and two feet so easy enough to hold the brake with the left foot and push the load pedal. The hill hold thing annoys me as well as it would be nice if it would just stay on until the accelerator was pressed.

 

The earlier one (that went BANG) didn't have any of this shit and was no worse for the lack.

[loserone]

The hill-hold on my Scooby was clearly a very good idea, but the 'release' and the biting point of the clutch were about 10mm from each other, so it still took a bit of a knack.  I'm sure it could have been adjusted, but I didn't use it very often.

 

The foot-operated parking brake on the LS400-of-a-number-of-shitists doesn't seem to have any way of releasing it smoothly except to hold it on the brake whilst you do so, making a hillstart either a heel-and-toe or two-footed affair.   Not something that would put me off an £11.20 car.

[Fabergé Greggs]

Non- original seats.