Justin Case Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Skoda Yeti, the Stannah stairlift of the automotive world, seem to be all on Mobility, driven by giffers with a pound of spuds on their shouldersAbsolutely spot on:) I was in Sutton Coldfield shopping centre earlier today and the local Skoda emporium had a display there. The Citigo, Fabia and Octavia were covered in stickers offering amazing PCP deals, but you could hardly see the Yeti for Mobility stickers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felly Magic Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Should have the interior done by HSL (Formerly Shackleton's of Batley) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I_am_Diesel Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Every time I see a Toyota Hi Lux I can't help but picture it with a RPG launcher crudely mounted in the load bed encircled by a load of chaps with AK47's slung across their backs. mercrocker 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
New POD Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Everyone I know with an mx-5 is heterosexual and a 'driving enthusiast' Ah well, my 2 kids and my wife think I'm probably denying my gayness, and they see my driving enthusiasm as a "deathwish". In the words of my daughter "Well you are gay dad. "In the words of my wife "Please be careful, and drive carefully" Now I've got a new clutch on her mx5, I can practise getting it sideways. J-Rod 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
New POD Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I wouldn't be angry driving a Zafira, I'd be fucking livid! Citroen Picasso says to me, sub prime borrowing on it from Carcraft, driven by a sweaty family dressed in some Matalan shorts. Welding on sill done by a 'mate' resembling bird shit, missing hubcap. Picasso says "Mrs Alison Campbell of Squirrel Green Formby, you fat, ugly, middle aged lying bitch". I hope you goggle your name and address and find out that I hate the very ground you walk on - Whiplash ?MY ARSE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Every time I see a Toyota Hi Lux I can't help but picture it with a RPG launcher crudely mounted in the load bed encircled by a load of chaps with AK47's slung across their backs. small point of order, it's extremely unusual to see an RPG that has been vehicle mounted. usually its one of these babies which is a DShK or Dooshka to it's friends (translates and "sweetheart"), mounted thus whereas your RPG (rocket propelled grenade) is almost always man-portable, as modelled by this chap who says you can't have fun with firearms? Rusty_Rocket, Coprolalia and The Moog 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I_am_Diesel Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Sorry dude, excuse my ignorance, I'm an ex-crab. mercrocker and Taff 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Sorry dude, excuse my ignorance, I'm an ex-crab. in that case, where's my fucking luggage? I_am_Diesel and mercrocker 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I_am_Diesel Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Dunno, mine's in my hotel room. The Army dig in and the RAF check in. alf892 and Taff 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghosty Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I find a lot of these around Levenshulme and Rusholme, often a bit battered.And Birmingham. The same demographic used to like these before they all rusted away. They like these too: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brownnova Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Angry Parents. I don't know what it is about these but every time I see one coming, I think 'Uhoh,' and expect something to happen to annoy/scare me.Nothing shouts motability benefits louder than a Zafira to me! Knew lots of people with motability Zafiras. There was one near me who drive a Zafira who used to forget he had a limp sometimes. He had to go back to the car to fetch his walking stick whilst the kids wandered off. (although I am aware of how most people do need their Motability, just one example) Slowly being replaced with new Zafira/C-Max now. Vince70 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TRW Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 These. For some reason they have a terrible image of being old fashioned and a granddad chariot. I absolutely love mine for the fact that its not a same age Golf or Focus, or A3 or whatever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angry Sheep Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Same as above, but whose Datsun Figaro succumbed to structural rot: That, or a spoilt brat of a 17-year-old whose daddy has bought her a car. She'll sit on your tail through a 30 limit getting all gobby at you for slowing her down but then daren't go above 50mph when past the NSL signs as things happen too quickly and she's got better things to concentrate on (Instagramming selfies). Negative Creep, EssDeeWon, Coprolalia and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 "First Job (Male)" Every time I do a pre-dawn airport run to Luton, there are herds of these all heading somewhere, usually being driven by someone who looks about 12... "First Job (Female)" Complete with the remains of the last six/ten trips to McDonalds "Don't Need a First Job - Daddy Will Just Pay For Me" ...and will be driven with the seat as far forward as it will possibly go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sierraman Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Nothing shouts motability benefits louder than a Zafira to me! Knew lots of people with motability Zafiras. There was one near me who drive a Zafira who used to forget he had a limp sometimes. He had to go back to the car to fetch his walking stick whilst the kids wandered off. (although I am aware of how most people do need their Motability, just one example) Slowly being replaced with new Zafira/C-Max now.My old man had a Zafira, in doom blue base spec 'life'. It used to make me die a bit inside with acute embarrassment as he'd drop me off at the pub in it. I just knew people would be laughing at us sat in the awful chairs Vauxhall called seats. In the end I turned to the bus or if it was summer I'd walk. Despite arriving for an evening out sweating profusely, I'd not have had the indignation of being seen in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 These. For some reason they have a terrible image of being old fashioned and a granddad chariot. I absolutely love mine for the fact that its not a same age Golf or Focus, or A3 or whatever.It's all the walnut... I agree though, it's a better car than its given credit for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felly Magic Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Volvo estates used to be the choice of middle class people with labradors, then Lovejoys, then they became the choice of the Indian bloke with the corner shop, now it's a bunch of haggis chomping Irn Bru drinking reprobates north of the border who are 'stereotypical Volvo drivers' TRW 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 Airport taxi. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 "I'm pretending to like cars but in fact, I just want all my shit to look brand new," Was given one of these monstrosities as a courtesy car back at the start of the year. I lost count of the amount of pointless/hard to actually work/unfathomable gimmicks on it and thought it was a pile of utter toss. Also, it drove like an oil tanker and I had no clue where it started or ended when it came to parking as the visibility is piss poor. With all the love for Astras round these here parts, I don't think these will be afforded the same affection in 20 years time (if, indeed, they're not all fridge doors by then..). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 Budget airport taxi. Was in one of these not too long back. Thought it was quite well stuck together..! oldcars 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 This will be piloted by one of the following: A dizzy bint, who drives using 97% of the road as she plays with her iPhone/iPod (whilst wearing headphones, of course) who's parked it across three spaces because she's seen a shop she likes and got excited. An estate agent with a vinyl wrap advertising their company. An ambulance chasing solicitor's company with a vinyl wrap advertising their company. mercrocker 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 Unmarked police car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-Rod Posted August 11, 2015 Author Share Posted August 11, 2015 The Insane. RichardK and TRW 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felly Magic Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Ah the Renner Flatulence! I heard they came as standard with a straight jacket and a dose of electro shock therapy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RichardK Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 If they'd put the engine in the middle, you would be fighting Smart Roadster buyers off with a stick as they sought something more reliable. Actually, Renault... Smart... FFS. Most obvious tie-in ever. to resurrect the Roadster. So naturally it won't happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RichardK Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Anyone going slower than I am?Incompetent.Anyone going faster?Reckless idiot. The car really doesn't matter Richard 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghosty Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Unmarked police car. Where I live it's low-spec Evoques IIRC. Pretty obvious as nobody else round here would buy one without big wheels and white paint (rozzer ones are cooking blue, small wheels etc). They'd do a lot better to buy Kia Sportages, nobody would suspect a thing. J-Rod 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
New POD Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 This will be piloted by one of the following: A dizzy bint, who drives using 97% of the road as she plays with her iPhone/iPod (whilst wearing headphones, of course) who's parked it across three spaces because she's seen a shop she likes and got excited. An estate agent with a vinyl wrap advertising their company. An ambulance chasing solicitor's company with a vinyl wrap advertising their company. Yes. It's a Mk2 version. Mk1 version is either driven by bloke in his late 40's who is married with 2 grown up kids and has just buggered the engine on his Honda, or his 19 year old daughter, whose friends describe her driving in terms like "adverturous and optimistic",or his wife, who knows where the redline is thank you, but not the son, because "I'm not fucking gay Dad" EssDeeWon 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2MB Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 Saying BINI drivers sodomise their daughters is a bit strong Richard and J-Rod 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EssDeeWon Posted August 11, 2015 Share Posted August 11, 2015 My Autoshite Reps:- The MK1 Mondeo is the modern day MK5 Cortina, the last few are still knocking on but being driven by old gits complete with seat covers and some 90s Halfords accessories. 90s japs (Honda/Mazda/Toyota) will deliver your chinese / Indian / Pizza on a Saturday night MK1 Focus will be driven by someone in their 30s/40s and on their arse, DO NOT collide with one because they wont have valid insurance. Nissan Figaro's - Sassy Girls in their 20s or woman in their 40s who think they are quirky. Fiat 500's - Birds who think they are all that, their shit don't stink, and their phone is probably worth more than my actual car! Rover 75 - Grumpy old unsociable bastards Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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