Shite on Top Gear

[wuvvum]

On now. Clarkson is driving a Beta Coupe. :DHammond's in an old Kadett and May is in a W123 Merc.

[Baz]

Very entertaining!

[bigstraight6]

Yep. very entertaining! Very Mad Max The elderley Opel did well!

[Volksy]

Really enjoyed the show tonight.. Glad they didnt kill the Kadett!

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

That Kadett was bloody impressive, wasn't it?

[retrogeezer]

One of the best Top Gear's I've seen, the Opel was fantastic.

[Mr H Sceptre]

Superb episode. Glad to see the Beta was true to form & packed in the most. Shame it wasnt a Beta saloon though.

[Betaphile]

An ultra-rare Beta auto - I didn't know any were left! I enjoyed it - good hour of entertainment. Also brings back memories, especially JC's, "It's a good job they canted this engine over by twenty degrees, because that means it's more inaccessible than it otherwise would have been". You've no idea how many times I've uttered that, doused with a few dozen more expletives. Also worthwhile doing a standard Beta fault checklist: Broken door handle - checkCracked overflow tank - checkBroken window winder - checkWillingness to fix itself if you let it cool down - checkSupremely flimsy headlight surrounds - checkJammed throttle - checkTemperamental carby - checkI say JC got a good deal. :DMost impressive thing though was that he mentioned problems with the alternator, HT leads, distributor cap, spark plugs and starter solenoid - fixed all of them and it still wouldn't go - in other words, it was working in spite of them...

[gtd2000]

Do you think they deliberately didn't choose anything Japanese?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I didnt see top gear, i'm presuming they didnt just smash these cars to bits for a laugh like they usually do?

[michiel]

I saw the repeat wednesday, they bought the cars in Africa to cross Namibia/Botswana, desert, wildlife park etc. Reasonably entertaining, and in a pretty authentic African keep your car going with corrugated iron and pieces of string style (except you never see what happens off camera).

[gtd2000]

I saw the repeat wednesday, they bought the cars in Africa to cross Namibia/Botswana, desert, wildlife park etc. Reasonably entertaining, and in a pretty authentic African keep your car going with corrugated iron and pieces of string style (except you never see what happens off camera).

Back in '94 I was in Zimbabwe and drove a '69 mazda that had a piece of string for the accelerator and only one brake on the offside front wheel I'd never have passed my test in it! Talk about "kangarooing"

[Pillock]

Yeah it was a better episode than most of the "lets buy something old and 'see what happens'" ones, where inevitably they end up smashing all the cars up for entertainment. I know two of the cars were pretty well gone by the end of it, but it was for a reason and showing how third world drivers cope with running a car.And the Kadett ruled.

[wuvvum]

And the Kadett ruled.

Yup. So much so that Hammond's shipping it to Britain.

[Albert Ross]

I'd buy it........bet it ends up being sold for Children in Need on Ebay though...............

[MrRegieRitmo]

Nah he loves little Oliver too much - bless im!Refreshing to see one of them cherishing an old car with the things they can afford! There'd be no other reason for him to have it other then he just likes it.

[Mr Livered]

Refreshing to see one of them cherishing an old car with the things they can afford! There'd be no other reason for him to have it other then he just likes it.

Money can't buy character...

[mouseflakes]

Money can't buy character...

...though it can buy Carisma (sic)

 

[Karmann Ghiaman]

It was years before it dawned on me that Carisma is a feeble pun. Thought it was just the Japanese spelling something wrong as usual. My mate Tim pointed out that they like to choose English words that they can't pronounce at all, e.g. Corolla is one of the most difficult possible things to say if you're Japanese and they make 5 million of them. Sony was an attempt at 'Sunny', Mazda is really Masada, etc.

 

Saw Top Gear on Channel Dave last night, no shite in sight . There would have been a lot more hits on Mr Clarkson driving those vulgar German cars if I'd been amongst the soldiers shooting at him. You could see it vaguely dawning on his retarded brain that the E Type and DB5 were works of engineering art beyond being mere cars, though his taste remains that of the 17-year old with a Provisional Licence in a red Escort with tinted windows, go-faster stripes & furry dice...

[r.welfare]

Nah he loves little Oliver too much - bless im!Refreshing to see one of them cherishing an old car with the things they can afford! There'd be no other reason for him to have it other then he just likes it.

Hmm, wonder what he will do with it. Last year Hammond wrote in his newspaper column that he'd got drunk and bought a Vauxhall Firenza on eBay by accident, but he was going to restore it...

[metrognome]

Found this on you-tube t`other day.......ah well some live in hope. http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=fpL9a-5LFpI

[Mr Lobster]

Hmm, wonder what he will do with it. Last year Hammond wrote in his newspaper column that he'd got drunk and bought a Vauxhall Firenza on eBay by accident, but he was going to restore it...

There was something about Hammond in one of the classic car magazines a while back, apparently he is actually restoring the Firenza.Nice to see that he genuinely is an enthusiast I thought.

[MrRegieRitmo]

It was years before it dawned on me that Carisma is a feeble pun. Thought it was just the Japanese spelling something wrong as usual. My mate Tim pointed out that they like to choose English words that they can't pronounce at all, e.g. Corolla is one of the most difficult possible things to say if you're Japanese and they make 5 million of them. Sony was an attempt at 'Sunny', Mazda is really Masada, etc.

and allegedly Starion was meant to be Stallion

[mk2_craig]

Wasn't that the result of a monumental misunderstanding on the part of Colt Car Company when they phoned Japan sortly before launch to ask what name they wanted the car to be called for the UK market?

[ChinaTom]

Yes, and the Japanese chaps who were making the decision were in a kareoke bar, saki'ed up, eating raw prawns from a raw clam (if you see my meaning) when the proprietor bought in a phone (like they do in 007 movies) to their little den of NHS rimmed shirts hanging out passion, to take a call from Ingerand.I love Japan. It has soul.

[Karmann Ghiaman]

There is a soft drink in Japan called KARUPIS. Story goes that the company that invented it asked an Aussie what would be a nice name for it. 'Oh, call it Cowpiss, mates,' he told them; thereby partially avenging the maltreatment of Commonwealth prisoners during WW2.

 

I discover that Channel Dave only has one programme. Top Gear. Tonight's was from MMIII which I take to be Latin for 2003. It also has just two adverts, one of which is the totally shite one for the Vauxhall Corsa with that thinassed girl on a bike being given a lift by a creepy sort of children's toy, a psychotic Spongebob, that says 'Cumon!' (Cum on what exactly?). Wonder who they're aiming that at?

[Karmann Ghiaman]

Found this on you-tube t`other day.......ah well some live in hope.

 

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=fpL9a-5LFpI

(though the twat was, in fact, born in 1960). Steve Coogan took the p well out of him in Saxondale, a work of genius.

[metrognome]

I have been shirking! from home today, and not only was I treated to re-runs of TG but also JCs motorworld and JCs extreme machines.........they should should forget about "Dave" and rename it the fuggin "Clarkson" channel.

[Karmann Ghiaman]

A nice day's shirk, Mr metrognome. Yes, Jeremy C is extremely irritating. You feel that you'd like to punch him in the mouth (a better target than that enormous belly), but at the same time find yourself agreeing with the wretched fellow. A sort of human version of the Daily Mail. Certainly he is a witty writer and churns it out. It's rather sad the way Richard Hammond stares up at Clarkson's jabbering gob, like a faithful little spaniel that loves his master so (including while being driven to the vet to be put down). I suppose James May is the best of the bunch, but all three are pretty frightful. It's like a group of pub bores who've got the whole country for their Saloon Bar. Worst of all is the truly atrocious footballers' cars they 'review', obviously way beyond the pockets of 99% of their viewers.

 

TIP : For an extra laugh when watching Top Gear, don't look at Clarkson fulminating. Look beyond, at the audience, especially the weird females in it. How much do they pay them to stand there?!?

[Guest]

I think Jeremy just does what is required to keep the majority of his audience entertained nowadays. Sadly, the majority of his audience aren't really interested in cars.Shame, because he can be a good motoring writer/presenter if he's not constantly trying to amuse 51-plate Mondeo owners. On a mid 90s Top Gear he did a surprisingly unbiased review of three imported Kei-cars, nowadays it would be "Oh tee hee look how small they are! Tiny! So we've arranged for 3 morbidly obese people to drive them..... around a go-kart track!"I think I'm the only person at work who doesn't watch Top Gear, yet I'm the only one there who has more than a faint interest in cars. Work that out.