OMG, Suspended From RetroRides

[Guest]

You have to go on a spotting tour, taking photos of every X-body and J-car you can find - please do this.

[Pete-M]

Ahhhh, the 'coat rack' wasn't meant in that way, no worries.

 

Pull up a chair, put your feet up and tell us about your Capri.

 

I like Capri Mk1s.

[red5]

Find me a non-rotten Grand National Celeste.

 

Or a 1984 Sapporo Turbo, in black, with Diamond Pack.

 

Ta.

 

edit: You do seem to be a bit hatstand though, so you'll fit in a treat.

(not coat-rack, suspect it means something different in the Colonies?)

[ChinaTom]

oughta stop really. Hadn't planned on the response. Fun though.

 

It's a hatstand, not a coatrack. Different meaning entirely.

[pogweasel]

[

 

And what else should I do or not do to be a good new lad.

Be less mental?

[Formula Autos]

They'd be Mercury Capris Stateside, wouldn't they? Or have you got a Euro import Team Blitz?

[scaryoldcortina]

 

It's a hatstand, not a coatrack. Different meaning entirely.

Remember, Norm may not even have heard of Roger Irrelevent, let alone know the "He's completely Hatstand" reference.

[AlsoMike]

OK, so what's a shite list, please?

It's a list of vehicles that you have owned, or still own. The more Citation IIs included, the more shite it will be.

[oldford]

This thread's too heavy for me. Anyway Team Blitz (or should we call you Norman) from across the sea, welcome to Autoshite, come in and lay your hat on the hat stand, kindly provided by Pete-M and relax.

[gtd2000]

I didn't get that first time round but after reading one of the posts not long after it and seeing the double post - I hear you loud and clear

 

[gtd2000]

To show you what a prick I am about retaining my human freedom, I am certainly the only guy who goes to the SEMA Show and demands the Chinese vendors tell me if they are "Mainland" or "Taiwan". If mainland, I explicitly instruct them that to do business with Honorable Norm they will have to become a peaceful country which accords their citizens human rights and keeps their treaty promises. Otherwise, The People's Republic of China can officially, and I quote, "Kiss my ass."

 

That's my SEMA shopping speech in the Chinese aisles. Even the Taiwan-based companies cringe, because they are afraid of Mainland Big Brother.

 

I am not.

 

Until you talk with UN Forces veterans who kept South Korea free (to build their lives, build Hyundais and other good stuff), and find out how the ChiCom humanitarians buried prisoners up to their heads in hog pens, people think it's all about "economics". It's not. It's about brutality.

 

So, man or woman, I really don't give two shits and a fark. They come here with their little red star helmets, whole bunches of US citizens will kill them like rats, or die trying. I don't need to know any Mandarin to pull the trigger.

Norm if you tell me that you only watch Fox News, I'd find it much easier to sympathise with your viewpoint.

 

I've travelled extensively through China from the mid 90's to the early 2K's. It's not the place you have in your mind I'd wager.

 

I've even lived in Taiwan (bit of a dump really but the women have a more Western mindset) but I think I preferred China overall.

 

The poster for the USA says one thing and does another - I know that because I've travelled around the world and even lived in the USA.

 

The poster for China says one thing but it is another...

 

We've all been duped by propaganda comrade...

[Formula Autos]

Can anyone please provide a translation to some parts of this thread, in a Stanley Baxter stylee?

 

 

 

If not, can it be made a 'sticky' please, to give us all time to work it out?

[Justin Case]

You'll never see me claiming to be "normal". That's something you might be worried about. I'm not.

So this isn't you then

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohDi-L6c ... re=related

 

Welcome

[Cavcraft]

Stanley Baxter?

 

I reckon Stanley Unwin would have a job here. Glad I'm not the only one who is struggling with this thread.

[whitevanman]

Can anyone please provide a translation to some parts of this thread, in a Stanley Baxter stylee?

 

 

 

If not, can it be made a 'sticky' please, to give us all time to work it out?

what...as in Parliamo Glasgow styleeeeee !!! might need to think about it for a day or two before I atempt that one

[whitevanman]

Personally I find Norm quite easy to follow...........this may say more about me than him though

[HillmanImp]

So let me get this right? A BMW has been banned from Retro Rides by chairman Mao for throwing a hatstand at him from a Chevy Sprint?

 

Or have I gone wrong somewhere?

[Formula Autos]

So let me get this right? A BMW has been banned from Retro Rides by chairman Mao for throwing a hatstand at him from a Chevy Sprint?

 

Or have I gone wrong somewhere?

Yes, you've gone wrong somewhere - it was a Chevy Citation.

 

Don't forget Celeste either - the Governor with the lesbian wife. Though where that fits in, fup knows.

[Guest]

So let me get this right? A BMW has been banned from Retro Rides by chairman Mao for throwing a hatstand at him from a Chevy Sprint?

 

Or have I gone wrong somewhere?

That is more or less accurate. A few degrees off and you might hit Altrincham.

 

It's probably for the best that your filter omits certain posts, and extrapolates the verbose elements from Norm's stream of consciousness.

 

In summary

 

I think the lemon is silver, and I asked for it last Saturday. It is not Came's. He borrowed mine. Put it in the jar! The jar, dude!

[Guest]

I get it. You've ground my Piazza back box up and you're inhaling it, piece by piece.

[Formula Autos]

Just a for instance guys.

 

Say you had a tasty Capri, but somehow the exhaust fumes made their way into the cabin as you drove it around. What effects would this have?

 

On a totally unrelated subject, here's a clip from the film Thunderbolt and Lightfoot:

 

[Justin Case]

You don't by any chance have any connection with the world of music

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/STEINWAY-Grand-c- ... 43a0edbe67

[Guest]

I get it. You've ground my Piazza back box up and you're inhaling it, piece by piece.

A pizza box? No, I certainly may be accused of being a pizza bogart, no question: "He who eats the quickest gets the mostest." But I'm more partial to the pie than the box it comes it, to turn a phrase, er.....

 

OK. If I inserted the words 'ANSA backbox' , 'Isuzu Impulse' and 'early 2009' into my query, would I still get the postman bringing me mice?

[Formula Autos]

That's Dirty Harry showing Ken his "finger Nambu", which is a gun I do not have in my collection.

This guy has guns?

[Guest]

OK. If I inserted the words 'ANSA backbox' , 'Isuzu Impulse' and 'early 2009' into my query, would I still get the postman bringing me mice?

It's here "somewhere", Ken. You want I should mail it soon?

Yes please. I can't buy owt else from the States because every seller on eBay appears to charge $30 and up for posting a T shirt.

 

PM me a quote and I can massage my 'figures' from my bank manager.

'That money was just resting in my account'

 

etc.

[Guest]

OK. If I inserted the words 'ANSA backbox' , 'Isuzu Impulse' and 'early 2009' into my query, would I still get the postman bringing me mice?

It's here "somewhere", Ken. You want I should mail it soon?

Yes please. I can't buy owt else from the States because every seller on eBay appears to charge $30 and up for posting a T shirt.

 

PM me a quote and I can massage my 'figures' from my bank manager.

'That money was just resting in my account'

 

etc.

Please to send me email, Ken, with your honorable address. Please I will endeavor to honorably find pizza box in my stash. Such a search is honorable and I will honorably discharge this task, your honor.

Less discharge.

 

Please.

[scaryoldcortina]

Wow, that's a nice looking capri.. I'm glad my name and contact details made it onto ukranian TV, I have lots of potential customers there!

 

 

you gonna spill the beans about lilla now, or what?

[warren t claim]

You don't by any chance have any connection with the world of music

I am a distant relative of Frank Zappa. Go ahead. Freak out.

That's good enough for me!

 

Welcome aboard!

[eddyramrod]

Norm: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! As if invoking the Blunt wasn't bad enough anyway, you have to quote the blatant lie of his first big hit! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

 

"My life is brilliant (slash wrists)

My life is pure (pump all over bathroom floor)"

 

I can only think of one more suicide-inducing "song" and that's "Dry Your Eyes Mate" by The Streets. Which says something, really, given the dire state of so-called music over the last 30 years or so.

[warren t claim]

Norm: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

I can only think of one more suicide-inducing "song" and that's "Dry Your Eyes Mate" by The Streets. Which says something, really, given the dire state of so-called music over the last 30 years or so.

You have obviously never heard Seasons in the Sun by Terry Jacks

.