THE GUBBERMINT ALWAYS KNOWS BEST

[Lankytim]

The motherfuckingcocksuckingdoghumpinghitlerlovingmotfailing exhaust manifold/downpipe seal has failed on the Mini AGAIN. Its so loud I can't hear the radio anymore. THREE separate garages have attempted and failed to fix this damn thing now. Although the last garage did the best job (lasted a few months).

 

Mega daft question. Is the clamp on upside down? I had similar with the Allegro, sealed exhaust for a few weeks till it started blowing again, turns out i'd put the two clamp sections on the wrong way up!

[boobydoo]

Frickin 'ell! Just when you think you are on top of everything, it all goes bum-tits up!!

 

After resolutely failing to start since its lay up over winter, the Chrysler 2 Litre was back on the road this week thanks to a new fuel pump and filter..plus a set of brand new tyres all round.....so off I tootle to get a quote to just get some scratches on the boot and bonnet sorted. Drives lovely...I'm happy as a pig in s**t.....arrive at destination...talk through the work needed on the Alpine....looks like it might be a goer after all....drive two minutes down the road and the Chrysler cuts out...will not start! Hmmm, the fuel filter seems a bit crud laden and rather dry so I reckon it could be dirty fuel not helping matters but a bit flummoxed as to why the new pump isn't doing its job.

 

Here's the sod broken down looking all innocent....

 

 

Call out RAC...who take 90 minutes to arrive but do manage to get her started with a manual pump and kindly follow me the 15 miles back home in case it happens again...which it does 3 times. More manual pumping of fuel gets me going again and the last five miles she runs lovely . I check the fuel quality and it seems clean now...but as I reverse into garage ...cuts out, wont start. As you know I'm not a tech minded person so I'm a bit stymied as to what the problem is. I had all the tank cleaned out last November but there is obviously still some muck in there.

 

Arrived home three hours later than planned and still had to mow the lawn. I'm knackered now.

 

So at the moment, the white Tagora is the only car up and running...the Simca ran out of MOT last week so Ive SORNED it for the time being, the red Tagora is still waiting an exhaust, the Alpine is at bodyshop......

 

 

Tagora living the high life on a night out a couple of weeks ago.!!

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Hmm, will check that, Tim

 

Pete, just bang on a nice LCB.

 

(Long Centre Branch)

So many benefits, and you won't regret it. Also an excuse for a better intake manifold.

Ah that I could. It's still my mum's car - I'm promised it when my parents move south or mum gives up driving. This promise was made a fair few years ago, I hope it doesn't dissolve if my dad ever finds out what Minis go for nowadays

[M'coli]

^^^1275 posts, Peter! Anyway, I have a Minisport LCB in the garage if you need it - where abouts are you? (You mention "south"!)

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I've peen arsing around with my Argenta this evening, i have fully interrogated the injection wiring and can find absolutley nowt wrong with it, so can only conclude the ECU is pappered. One last test to do with my new NOID LIGHT after which i will have to find someone who can test/repair the ECU.

[Cavcraft]

Took the Corsa dash out this evening to see how many bulbs the last owner had had off. I think there was only three left in it and the mingebag had even had some of the bastarding bulb holders off too. Scrapyard beckons I think and I'll also have to get the screws he left out as well

Oh well, I started T-cutting a bit more of it and once I'd put the newly charged up battery on it it started first turn of the key.

 

Discovered (thankfully) that Vespa+Merc=fit in the same garage which means the Cortina is safely (or as safely as can be) parked up in my other lock-up.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

^^^1275 posts, Peter! Anyway, I have a Minisport LCB in the garage if you need it - where abouts are you? (You mention "south"!)

Onwards to 1380! I'm in Manchester. Thanks for the offer, but I reckon it'll be a few years before my name's on the V5. Until then I'll play with my Herald, while the poor Mini does 2 miles a day with the choke out the whole way.

[pogweasel]

Tomorrow I am going to view a car that is Sensible.

You know, a proper car like normal people drive.

 

I am not sure that I want to be doing this.

[M'coli]

Steady now - keep taking the tablets. I must admit, I suffered cold shivers down my spine and revulsion at the thought of this.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Hey, we all drive proper sensible cars normal people drive.

 

We just lag two or three decades behind, that's all.

[Twiggy]

Frickin 'ell! Just when you think you are on top of everything, it all goes bum-tits up!!

 

Have you checked that the vent on the fuel cap is clear ? If it is blocked, then a vacuum is created in the tank which the pump can`t overcome, giving the symptons you describe. When it happens again, remove the filler cap and listen - see if you can hear air rushing into the tank - if you can, that`s the problem. Solve it by making sure the hole in the filler cap is clear.

[Pillock]

Tomorrow I am going to view a car that is Sensible.

You know, a proper car like normal people drive.

 

I am not sure that I want to be doing this.

 

Pfft. I'm looking at Mk4 Golfs at the moment.

I've even seem some weird stuff with too many letters and not enough numbers in the registration. This confuses me.

[wuvvum]

Boobydoo, I suspect that there are many on here who would give at least one of their testicles to have that white Tagora as their only useable car, so don't complain too much.

[pogweasel]

Well amazingly* the car that was advertised was no longer available (despite us arriving 5mins after they opened).

 

Would sir care for the petrol version? Not really.

 

Or how about this lovely* 09-reg Coarser 1.3CDTi at just £6741.... let me think, oh yes, I would rather stick my head in the oven...

 

what a waste of chops.

[wuvvum]

I think there's a moral to that story somewhere. Sensible cars are a waste of time. Or something.

[boobydoo]

Thanks for the advice, guys. I shall look into it and report back! the re-usable filter sounds a good idea too!

 

Regards,

 

boobs

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I have boshed my Chavalier on eBay, no res. its gotta go!

 

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=110672574993

[Richard]

Had a go at resurrecting the PeteM-spec 205 GTi this morning. That involved fitting a battery that's been lying in my garden for months and seeing what happens. The car hadn't been started for months.

 

 

It didn't really want to move, but it did in the end.

 

 

I did the underbonnet wiring for the conversion. I wasn't there when the engine was installed but I'm told that only one thing didn't work when it was all put together.

[pogweasel]

Just spent a miserable hour or two failing abysmally to get the clutch thingy put back together on my BMW.

 

Now have dismantled so much of the car I think the next step is to tug the engine out.

 

I would pull the brake servo off but the HBOL say DANGER TO TEH ABS, and that amatuers (of which I am the most amateur of all) should under no circumstances attempt this job, as it may cause a tsunami or the death of a people's princess or house prices to fall or SOMETHING.

 

(Anyone know what they are on about?)

[pogweasel]

Here's the problem.

 

I need to get the bit with the red arrow to slide into the bit with the green arrow (master cyl) then theres a pin thing goes in the m/c to hold it all together.

 

 

However the bit that slides in seems to go in on the piss no matter what I do, and it won't push in far enough.

 

I have tried everything, gently pushing, welting it with a hammer (such as you can with the access), making a tool thing up to apply more pressure one side than t'other in the hope it will go in straight.

It's a total fucker.

 

As you can see it's quite well buried, even with the coil pack thing removed and the PAS fliud gubbins hoiked out of the way, you still struggle to get at it.

 

ANy ideas gang, as this is really pissing me off now.

[trigger]

Just got the Escort back, As Retrogeezer asked, here are the photo of the repairs.

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, I've got a bit of work to do now, Still all this plus a new rear wheel cylinder and the mot for £200 doesn't sound too expensive.

[M'coli]

Pog - have you asked a BMW-speciifc forum, or are they all full of bell-ends telling you to stick on 20" rims and that?

 

Trig, there appears to be about 3" of missing weld at the bottom of the arch, is it meant to be like that?

[pogweasel]

Pog - have you asked a BMW-speciifc forum, or are they all full of bell-ends telling you to stick on 20" rims and that?

 

Yeah, asked over a week ago for advice on this, not a single fucking response. Wankers.

Should have started a thread about which stickers to put on or which HIDeous headlamp kit is the best.

[trigger]

Trig, there appears to be about 3" of missing weld at the bottom of the arch, is it meant to be like that?

 

Very good question, I noticed that as well, I'm not taking it back now so it's going to get some fiberglass pushed into it.

[M'coli]

Pog - have you asked a BMW-speciifc forum, or are they all full of bell-ends telling you to stick on 20" rims and that?

 

Yeah, asked over a week ago for advice on this, not a single fucking response. Wankers.

Should have started a thread about which stickers to put on or which HIDeous headlamp kit is the best.

Have you asked on what used to be the Car Mechanics forum?

http://www.kelsey-forums.co.uk/cgi-bin/ ... board=mech

[Guest]

Almost finished valeting the Galant, so I took a photo.

 

 

I like when the weather gets nice, I can start giving the car a gradual clean when I get home. A panel or two every evening until the whole lot is sorted. Clay bars and polish and wax and all that business. I like cleaning cars with solid colour paint, it goes from flat to shiny and looks superb when it's done. Looks very conspicuous in the work car park amongst all the 07-reg Amicas and suchlike. Having a crap job is bearable if you get to drive to it in a chintzy old car.

[Angrydicky]

That Galant is gorgeous! Love that era of Mitsubishi.

[Tayne]

.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

 

I "refurbed" half the Golf's steelies today, it's amazing what a difference it makes to the overall appearance. It's still a grim old shed though, another thing to do is get rid of the "pogweasel pink" action on the C pillars, boot and rear quarters. Tesco's own T-cut isn't really doing the job. Time for some red Hammerite?

[Mr Lobster]

"pogweasel pink"

 

Been trying to rid the R4 of its Pogweasel Pink hue as well with reasonable results so far. Hard work but Farecla G3 + Autoglym seems to be working so far. Also, got some proper paint mixed for the rear bumper and redid that (breaking one of the rubber overriders in the process) and painted the wheels. Looks loads better already!