Brown as fuck: 2001 BMW X5 3.0 - Exxon5!

[Kiltox]

Nearly got a shot of some serious 2001 car park shite with the Primera too but my phone was dead and I had to move it to the street

[Wack]

I thought you were collecting it from London, you appear to have bought your Irn Bru from a woman in Newcastle

[Kiltox]

When I was filling up someone in a diesel Megane arrived behind me, filled up, went in and paid, came back out and was like “Jesus! I’ve never seen someone buy that much fuel! This does 50mpg!”

 

“....this doesn’t”

[Kiltox]

So it drove home well. No real issues to report.

 

Parking sensors are inop - it lets out a long beep when selecting reverse and then nothing. PDC button flashes.

 

Slight judder from the front when braking lightly from 50+ - goes away if you brake harder. Assume the discs are past their best but it’s probably actually a knackered everything scrap it m8

 

Cruise control doesn’t seem to work but I don’t know if I was fiddling with the right buttons

 

Autodimming wing mirror on the drivers side is burst so it’s brown to match the paint

 

Radio / TV unit is horribly dated. Quite laughable really

[Kiltox]

Oh and the trip computer is counting miles negatively (wtf???)

 

Odometer isn’t before you say it.

[cort16]

It's not one of these pre-satnav things that lets you put in a target mileage to a destination and counts downwards towards your journey?

[Kiltox]

No idea. It might be something to do with the sat nav - if you program in a destination it changes??

 

Oh - drivers side electric window regulator is tired too. I really ought to replace it before it breaks.

[cort16]

I'd just drive it enjoying the ability to eat as many cadbury's flakes as you like while on the road as no matter how much chocolate melts into the seat you'll never see it.

[Pillock]

Parking sensors should tick... Engage reverse and put your ear right up against each one. The silent one is the faulty one.

 

Engine off or have faith in the handbrake, obvs

[Kiltox]

Parking sensors should tick... Engage reverse and put your ear right up against each one. The silent one is the faulty one.

 

Engine off or have faith in the handbrake, obvs

You learn something new every day. I was planning on hooking up my Delphi code reader to interrogate the PDC.

[Tayne]

 

Cruise control doesn’t seem to work but I don’t know if I was fiddling with the right buttons

 

 

 

 

Four buttons on the right hand side of the wheel.

 

Lower left  ("1/0") turns it on (light appears in binnacle), upper left (speed symbol) sets it, right hand side (plus / minus rocker) adjusts it. 

[Kiltox]

Yeah I thought that was the score - no sign of the light on the clocks doing anything.

 

Stereo controls on the wheel do work.

[Kiltox]

 

?!?

[BavarianRetro]

Airbag one, I think.

[nacho man]

We want approx 300 interior pics please.

[sierraman]

Make sure that all the seemingly innocuous interior electrics are working. There’s a module that controls all that stuff that’s prone to stopping various stuff from working. Electric windows, dipping pass mirror etc...

[Kiltox]

We want approx 300 interior pics please.

All in good time my man. The interior needs a bloody good clean and treatment of the dash etc. A quick dealer get it out the door valet after 150k miles and 17 years of being the family car hasn’t quite cut it.

[Kiltox]

Make sure that all the seemingly innocuous interior electrics are working. There’s a module that controls all that stuff that’s prone to stopping various stuff from working. Electric windows, dipping pass mirror etc...

On the whole, it all seems to be there.

 

Cruise control doesn’t turn on and the parking sensors are faulty, though.

[Wack]

I had a recall on a 15 year old xk8, possibility of cutting out on full throttle, some cars were getting new throttle bodies mine was a software update

I guess some Americans died

[cort16]

I wouldn’t spend any money on it . Just cruise around until it breaks or fails it’s mot.

[Kiltox]

I wouldn’t spend any money on it . Just cruise around until it breaks or fails it’s mot.

It was £2700 not £270....

 

I don’t mind fixing up minor stuff

[cort16]

I just think a lot of times the experience of enjoying a car can be ruined by the persuit of fixing minor things that don’t effect how the car operates.

 

It’s your car though so fill yer boots

[Kiltox]

Parking sensors are quite important when it’s like piloting your front room

 

I don’t think it feels that big on the road but in the multi-storey it’s HUGE.

[rantingYoof]

I wonder how a 2018 X3 stacks up against it dimensionally.

 

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Tapatalk

[BavarianRetro]

What you want is a rear view camera kit. Does it have the factory wide screen?

[sierraman]

Most jobs seem to be an absolute pig to do on these. Even taking the battery out is a bastard involving hoying the spare out, a big fuck off brace and an air pump.

[Kiltox]

What you want is a rear view camera kit. Does it have the factory wide screen?

I think so....

[Tayne]

Passenger airbag recall would have been 2015 I think, drive’s side was late 2017.

[rantingYoof]

I wonder how a 2018 X3 stacks up against it dimensionally.

 

Sent from my GT-I9505 using Tapatalk

 

Now I'm at a desktop I can reveal that a 2018 X3 is bigger than a 2001 X5, which I guess isn't a surprise, but still...

 

 

Even a 2018 X1 is wider than the 2001 X5, and around 200mm shorter.

[SRi05]

Parking sensors are quite important when it’s like piloting your front room

 

I don’t think it feels that big on the road but in the multi-storey it’s HUGE.

I drove one of these in Spain earlier this year, they really do feel like tanks. You feel invincible driving one, which is handy as the Spanish are fucking mental drivers