Oh no! Get back! It's another Postcard attack!

[Karmann Ghiaman]

Naff picture postcards are waiting for you in a forgotten corner of the Oxfam shop. It's a cheap, harmless hobby that brings much happiness...

 

Let us begin our latest tour with this That There London classic:

 

 

Including our immortal Queen wearing a squillion £'s-worth of diamonds (don't remind the Indians and South Africans how she acquired that little lot. Ignorance is bliss.)

 

And if Her Majesty would like some music, these chaps just march up and down outside:

 

 

A long, long time ago judging by the interesting crud parked with gay, bomb scare free abandon all over the shop.

 

One of them got a bit lost...

 

 

Typical Irish Guards (you can tell by the green hackle. Thank you This is London). Note fine watershite and cranes (driven by Alf Garnett) on the still-working river back in the day.

 

Remaining in the That There Metropolis:

 

 

Jan Smuts isn't looking where he's going. (That one should be easy to topple when the Thick-but-Noisy Little PC Twits start shouting at the Thicker-but-influential foreign-owned Meejah.)

 

But I digress. We are now entering the Famous Phallic Symbols Section...

 

...Still in T.T. London, here's a big one:

 

 

Travelling past in a bus once I overheard a well-informed Aussie girl tell her friends 'That's Napoleon at the top of his column'. Me, sotto voce: 'It would've been if Waterloo had gone the other way.'

 

Lucky nobody remembers how those generals Napier and Havelock got to Trafalgar Square by dealing with with the Indian Mutiny, isn't it just? But Nelson is quite safe; everybody loves him: he beat the Frogs and he shagged Emma Hamilton. Way to go, Horatio!

 

Here is another massive one belonging to a more recent foe:

 

 

You will find it on 9th of July Avenue, no doubt something nice happened in Argentine History on that happy day.

 

The French have erected (fnaar, fnaar) this to commemorate one of their weird war heroes:

 

 

WW1 fighter ace Georges Guynemer, with his famous stork emblem, off duty from delivering babies, holding it all up.

 

Still kicking against the pricks on our phallic theme, it's an old friend, Lighthouses:

 

 

This one was posted for 12-and-a-half-pee in 1984 and includes an intriguing message, apparently sent from some sort of Christian Boot Camp in Burnham-on-Sea, Somerset:

 

Dear Mum, Dad and Michael,

Gosh, I have one and a half hours off this afternoon - from 2.30 till 4. This is brill! Mind you I have to be in the kitchen by 7 a.m. of a morning. Anyway, everything seems well so far. Janet recovered wonderfully by late afternoon - praise the Lord. Also wonderfully - a chap called Anthony arrived willing to co - lead! He's great - a parapatetic [sic] music teacher from the same church as the couple who dropped out. Most of the team are new and younger than me!! It's hard work in the kitchen, but fun too, though it's in a sense more difficult to get friends with people. You'll be pleased to know there's no young men worth getting worked up about! Hope you have a lovely birthday Mum! God bless and loads of love, Rach: xx

 

Psychiatrists, if not Mum, Dad and Michael, would be extremely interested in her choice of card image.

 

And one more lighthouse/big nobby dick:

 

 

Plenty more postcard piffle to follow, folks.

[Ditchfinder General]

I always enjoy these postcard threads, bravo!

[carlo]

More please

[Cheggers]

Agreed, great stuff

[burraston2006]

Fantastic! Love looking at old postcards. Probably because I'm a nosey bxstard!

[noseypoke]

Great post...BUT....Oyrish Guards have BLUE Hackles oil be lettin ya know so I will      watched QI tother night

[mercrocker]

Excellent!   Some of those London souvenir card photos were pretty long-lived.   That's an Austin A70 Hereford getting covered in trombone spit but the stuff across the road  is distinctly pre-war in appearance.   And I bet they were still selling that card in 1968! 

 

Moar Please....

[pompei]

I love these threads KG. I was only thinking last week that we hadn't had any for a while

[Mr A Lawrence]

Keep em coming.

[Spottedlaurel]

I love these threads KG. I was only thinking last week that we hadn't had any for a while

 

Ditto, good to see some more.

 

I've been scanning and uploading a few onto Flickr but I wouldn't want to tread on KG's toes by posting them here (and my comments would be rather more dull).

[AlabamaShrimp]

I think we need them posted here just to check they're all OK

[Karmann Ghiaman]

Yes, Tayne, apologies, thought you'd be able to read the bottom of that last card. It is indeed Girdle Ness Lighthouse, Aberdeen. Probably the work of the famous Stevenson family (though I preferred Kidnapped and Treasure Island). Please add your PPCs too, Spottedlaurel, the more the mivvier. Mmm, Strawberry Mivvy, that brings back '70s holiday memories...

 

This got added to the Phallic selection, though it actually looks more like B*ll*cks:

 

 

Brilliant message from Petrol Store Tank Posa Rica, Mexico:

 

Dear Friends

We are four pre-professional students, who desire have correspondence with four of your integral's club. Please answer as soon as possible with four addresses. 

 Mexican salutation 

   your friends,

 You answer in English...

 

Did I ever mention that postcards were the Internet of their day?

 

New section: Hotels from Hell, starting with Tenerife in the Canary Islands (where Mrs KG & I have been, though we didn't stay in either of these):

 

 

This one above remains anonymous, though it looks like it might be on the notorious Playa de las Americas...

 

 

Cheesily-named Eurotel Interpalace at Puerto de la Cruz (which was once unsuccessfully attacked by our old friend Nelson. Not the hotel, Puerto de la Cruz I mean).

 

San Miguel in the Azores...

 

 

...not bad shite included, especially the beige van which we spotters would certainly have waited for.

 

Most of these were found in a rich Oxfam shop seam in Nottingham and may have been kept by the late owner to remind them where they'd been, so never sent   This one,  however, from the Hotel Alexandra, Mallorca, does include a message (though they posted it to Sheffield for 12 & a half pee when they got back):

 

 

Dear Steven & Dave,        8.3.83

 Having a lovely rest Sunbathing. good hotel this card is Hotel. We are sat by the pool now Food is good & people very friendly. Hope animals are O.K & not too much trouble & Weather is good for you.

 Maureen & Michael

 

Presumably Steven & Dave had been left in charge of the farm/zoo/dogs/cats/hamsters or some combination of creatures who were unable to accompany the two Ms to Mallorca. Fascinating, isn't it?

 

A rather nasty corner of Milan, though you can see the station entrance on the right and surprisingly little traffic:

 

 

And from one of the Italians' fellow-Axis powers:

 

 

Hotel Traube, Ruedesheim (Rhein). Telefon 067 22 / 2357 in case you like the look of the place and are thinking of booking.

 

Back to exotic islands, now it's Mauritius:

 

 

La Pirogue Hotel : Situated at Flic-en-Flac in the west, this hotel with its most delightful comfort and architecture, has become a first rate point of convergence a literal translation of the French assures us. Slightly reminiscent of those Mexican oil tanks, but still.

 

A welcome return to Blighty:

 

 

No shite, but nice RAC and AA signs. 'Hello, Operator? Get me Masham 295 please...'

 

Coming up: Creepy Animals and New Forest Ponies   

[pompei]

Lovely

[mercrocker]

 

 

 

 

Cheesily-named Eurotel Interpalace at Puerto de la Cruz (which was once unsuccessfully attacked by our old friend Nelson. Not the hotel, Puerto de la Cruz I mean).

 

San Miguel in the Azores...

 

 

...not bad shite included, especially the beige van which we spotters would certainly have waited for.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not to mention that VW Brasilia, right foreground.....Bloody hell!

[MarvinsMom]

the kings head is still there, in Masham.

 

and it looks pretty much the same!

 

it part of a big chain now, but they do a very pleasant, and reasonable priced meal.

 

beers ok too.

[stormee]

Brasilia on Lemmertz wheels, sexy!

Hotel Traube still in biz: http://www.rheingauhotel.com/traube-aumueller/

[seth]

Back to exotic islands, now it's Mauritius:

 

 

You are mistaken. That is clearly back in London on the Thames barrier.

[JohnDeere]

La Pirogue Hotel : Situated at Flic-en-Flac in the west, this hotel with its most delightful comfort and architecture, has become a first rate point of convergence a literal translation of the French assures us. Slightly reminiscent of those Mexican oil tanks, but still.

 

 

Bloody hell, I've stayed there. It still looks exactly the same. Hired a ratty old SJ40 which was painted in different colours on every panel, and went carefully around every corner. The Froggy guests were all in awe at some famous TV celeb staying there who performed (badly) some Beatles songs.

[Justin Case]

Thanks for posting another fascinating selection

And if Her Majesty would like some music, these chaps just march up and down outside:

 

 

A long, long time ago judging by the interesting crud parked with gay, bomb scare free abandon all over the shop.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Possibly the only known recorded sighting of a Nuffield Oxford taxi, so elusive it doesn't even appear on IMCDB and even here only peeps into the extreme edge. Was that the last vehicle ever made with artillery wheels (Barrett to the front desk?) Large open car in front of it may be a Bentley Mk 6?

[Karmann Ghiaman]

So you see, there is some meaning to Life after all?

 

A few of our furry  friends:

 

 

This was collected from a letterbox in central Birmingham at 1.30 pm on 27th February 1920:

 

My dear Lola,

            A very happy day to you! And many happy returns -

 It will be nice coming on a Saturday so that you can be at home - If a nice day. you should all go on a lovely long walk -

 Tiddles also sends his best wishes to you!

                        With much love

                               Auntie Syb

 

Tiddles was probably thinking 'Why the fuck do they call me that? My name's Gazza.'

 

We have had much analysis of Lucky Black Cats on cards before. Here's an example:

 

 

...from a long time ago judging by the shite (lack of). Next one was sent to Seaham in May 1957:

 

Having a lovely time beautiful weather & good cottage hope you are keeping O K will be seeing you soon

                                                                                                        Auntie Ethl

 

Whether the cats and horseshoes did ever bring any good luck or not remains a moot point.

 

Rarer thinking dog card:

 

 

Sent to the same people in Seaham in July 1959

 

Weather very changeable one minute it is pouring with rain next minute lovely & sunny but we are still enjoying ourselves

                                                                                     D. Redman

 

Ancient farting camel card from, you've guessed it...

 

 

No. 38 - Egypt In midst the high Dunes of the Sahara

 

Just found & opened lost tomb of boy pharoah Tut-Ank-Amun. Never been raided, still full of great stuff. Carnarvon says Curse starting to work, feels a bit funny, keeps scratching face. Personally I don't believe, but am looking both ways when crossing road, just in case!

                                                                         Howard C.

 

...is the sort of message that probably got sent on cards like that...

 

[Karmann Ghiaman]

Moth-eaten, camera shy  Brummie Roo and Joey:

 

 

Anyone remember them?

 

(I quite often go down the somewhat strange A444 and you have to be careful not to get stuck behind a powerful vehicle full of kiddies driven by Grandad at exactly 36mph all the way till they finally turn off at Twycross Zoo. It is best to make risky overtaking decisions at an early stage if you find yourself in this situation there; otherwise your journey takes twice as long and you discover the true meaning of blind hatred.)

 

This dolphin is supposed to be saying Everyone loves the swimming in FLORIDA

 

 

It was probably thinking OMG, Fat surface monkeys with a primitive camera. Better humour the dim-witted creatures... 

 

Meanwhile Horses:

 

 

Mary, Blaze, Imogen, Champion and Kevin Purdey. You can make up your own story.

 

Excellent Horses Card to send to your politically-correct, anti-bloodsports veggie friends:

 

 

Thay are having fun! (except the fox, that is, he's about to have his guts ripped out).

 

Some more old friends from the Postcard threads:

 

 

 

 

This is a mixture of previous cards because it's Bucklers Hard invaded by New Forest Ponies:

 

 

Whatever next!

 

But, lovely though pregnant wild gee-gees are, we will get back on track with a selection of your favourites featuring lonely roads, shabby carparks in sleepy towns and much cruddy shite...

 

 

Snake Pass for starters.

[fatharris]

I've missed these postcard rounds, thanks!

 

Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

[Urko]

Yes, Tayne, apologies, thought you'd be able to read the bottom of that last card. It is indeed Girdle Ness Lighthouse, Aberdeen. Probably the work of the famous Stevenson family (though I preferred Kidnapped and Treasure Island). Please add your PPCs too, Spottedlaurel, the more the mivvier. Mmm, Strawberry Mivvy, that brings back '70s holiday memories...

I had that down for Peterhead (which turns out I'd remembered wrong anyway because it's Fraserborough) - having been there.  I got thrown out* of the lighthouse museum because it was closing time.

[Karmann Ghiaman]

Not very imaginative views of this big bridge and some fine old crap pootling over it:

 

 

That white van driver has got the right idea about 'lane discipline'. We nip over to the capital of Ireland in 1958:

 

 

Enjoying ourselves very much. This is a lovely place for a holiday

 

declares Mrs Redman to Mrs Gregory at the Silkburn Coal Co. in Sunderland thereby warming the cockles of the heart of everyone at  the Irish Tourist Board. (Of course the Irish didn't like Nelson for constantly sinking their friend Napoleon's fleets (or even for shagging Emma Hamilton), so the IRA blew up that Column of his in the background there a few years later. Apparently they caused massive damage to all the nearby buildings and annoyed large numbers of their fellow-countrymen, but luckily nobody was hurt.)

 

Superb 1960s High Street Bridgnorth:

 

 

Choc-a-bloc with beauties upon which to feast your eyes.

 

Probably a good decade earlier in Evesham:

 

 

If you GoogleEarth these places now, bet they won't have changed much except that the cars and people (and baby transport) will all be much fatter.

 

If you need any yarn, this is the only place to go in Dunster:

 

 

Nice '70s detail is the Dymo tape label original collector stuck on their cards. I remember one Christmas when the Dymo machine was our family's main present and we all had endless fun labelling everything. Superfluous technology, Who needs i-phones?

 

Over in the Land of Our Fathers (well, Great Grandfather's in my case):

 

 

Fordshite dreamcard! It probably couldn't be any better if it had been deliberately posed for hours, but it's just a brilliant random early '70s moment of pure crud.

 

Quite nice crap and intrusive yellow line in Stonegate, York:

 

 

(Girl on the right in stripey top and short purple skirt is quite nice too, but I'm not so keen on her dowdy sister.) And another old friend, Clifford's Tower, also in York:

 

 

Perfectly safe from floods as long as you're a Goy...

[Junkman]

 

Hotel Traube, Ruedesheim (Rhein). Telefon 067 22 / 2357 in case you like the look of the place and are thinking of booking.

 

 

The phone number has changed, too: 0049 6722 9140

[martc]

 

The phone number has changed, too: 0049 6722 9140

 

Ah, now I know why I can't book my room there...

[Spottedlaurel]

Not very imaginative views of this big bridge and some fine old crap pootling over it:

 

 

That white van driver has got the right idea about 'lane discipline'.

 

Superb 1960s High Street Bridgnorth:

 

 

Choc-a-bloc with beauties upon which to feast your eyes.

 

If you need any yarn, this is the only place to go in Dunster:

 

 

Nice '70s detail is the Dymo tape label original collector stuck on their cards. I remember one Christmas when the Dymo machine was our family's main present and we all had endless fun labelling everything. Superfluous technology, Who needs i-phones?

 

KG has kindly authorised some additional card posting in this thread. For now, some related to those above:

 

Top Rank Motorport and Severn Bridge postcard 1960s? by Spottedlaurel, on Flickr

 

Let's rest awhile and gaze at the splendour of the Severn Bridge before heading across it into a foreign land.

 

Edit: Do any of those litter bins survive anywhere, the ones with a slatted timber surround and metal inner?

 

Town Hall and High Street, Bridgnorth old postcard mid-1980s by Spottedlaurel, on Flickr

 

Same scene as KG's card, some years later. Many old people to be seen, and some good cars.

 

Yarn Market, High Street, Dunster old postcard late 1960s #2 by Spottedlaurel, on Flickr

 

Yarn Market, High Street, Dunster old postcard late 1960s by Spottedlaurel, on Flickr

 

Dunster a popular one for the postcard publishers. Look at all those ADO16s! Yarn Market written in lower case on those cards doesn't half look like Yam Market.

[andrew e]

 The phone number has changed, too: 0049 6722 9140

The building next door - do you think it go airbrushed out the original? They got their money's worth out the wrough Iorn fence on the ground floor too. Cheers to KG & Junkman.

[Pillock]

Weirdly, the ASMM were stood about 20ft under where that photo was taken in Bridgnorth when a Maxi (first car in that 80s scene) came pootling through.

[chaseracer]

There was a Triumph 2000 too.  And a Rover 60...