Shite collection: I bought Wuvvum's Rover 75

[Skizzer]

On Saturday I went up to Chateau Wuvvum to buy the Rover 75 2.0 V6 Club he was offering on here the other week. I realise it’s neither a properly old car nor an epic voyage – SPOILER ALERT it didn’t blow up on the way home – but I thought I’d do a write up anyway.

 

11.50

So far so good – I’ve made it on to the right train. Arrived at Liverpool Street very early because I didn’t think the Waterloo & City line ran on Saturdays, but it does. Wuvvum, being a true gent, has offered to pick me up from the station at the other end so I don’t want to dick him about by missing the train. He’s sent me a description of the different coloured panels of The Rover Of Doom he’ll probably be driving and I’ve sent him a photo of my woolly hat, so we should be able to spot each other.

 

Decided it would be a good idea to grab some lunch at the station rather than eat train food. Feeling all sophisticated at being back in London, I forwent the usual M&S/Upper Crust etc stuff in favour of the friendly-looking Camden Food Company: mistake. Truly horrid panino, grudgingly shown the briefest glimpse of the hotplate. Whoever decided lukewarm chicken and cheese was pleasant should be forced to eat it daily for eternity.

 

12.05

Train started off on time but is grinding to an unscheduled halt in a place I don’t recognise – which I guess might be the Olympic village. There’s a big round stadium thing, a bonkers red helter-skelter and a couple of large buildings that still seem to be in their shrink wrap packaging. Hang on – we’re moving again.

 

12.25

Proper countryside now, the gently rolling fields of rural Essex peppered with birch and oak copses and flint churches. My mother’s family were farm labourers not far from here for generations, until my grandfather decided he’d seen enough mud in the Great War and settled in London. All this Englishness seems rather appropriate for collecting a Rover.

 

14.00

Emerging from the station, I spy a dark blue Rover 75 that looks familiar - yep, that’s Wuv in the very car I’ve come to collect. Really good to meet you both.

 

14.30

We sort out the paperwork, which is back at HQ, but not before Wuvvum gives me a quick demonstration of the most excellent Rover of Doom that’s parked there (a Rover 200 turbo diesel with a twist). Quick as in brief, but also as in rapid – I think I may have squealed like a girl.

 

He also gives me a tour of his fine, fine collection of interesting tat, including his recently acquired CX which I can confirm is every bit as full of win as it looks in the pictures. It’s the first time I’ve sat in a CX, and aside from the gloriously comfy brownness of it all and those instruments I’m struck that it feels just the right size inside, which is surprising given how it sprawls across the tarmac on the outside. This particular one is a lovely example, solid and just nicely scruffy, and idles very sweetly for us as it climbs to its feet. Jealous. I won’t list all the treasures of Wuvvum’s shed as he’s more than capable of doing that himself, but it was great to have a good nose around especially as he was already busy and running late. Thanks, I really appreciated it.

 

15.30

I’m under way in the Rover. First impression is that it really doesn’t feel like an old car – but then as a V-reg I guess it isn’t old, just cheap. It’s very comfortable, has plenty of toys, a great stereo (cassette deck! Yay!), and everything seems to work fine. As Wuvvum commented, it’s not fast - but that’s not what it’s for. Pulling away from the lights I wonder if some of the horses have escaped over the years, but then I realise that actually they’re just all romping around in’t top field – give it a bit of gas and there’s a decent shove and a lovely V6 noise to be found up above 4000rpm. It feels quite American in that respect, and reminds me a bit of a rented Pontiac Grand Prix I had a fling with in Georgia a few years back. Cowley did a better job than Detroit (or wherever) of nailing it together though.

 

In the same way as this episode of Sesame Street was brought to you by the Number Five and the Letter K, the Rover 75’s interior is brought to you by the Shape Oval and the Colour Beige. The instruments look just like the clock that my grandfather had on his mantelpiece, but thankfully don’t tick as loudly. In fact nothing ticks, rattles, squeaks or whines, apart from Weekend Woman’s Hour that’s just started on Radio 4.

 

16.30

The East Anglian landscape is all about sky and the light is beautifully golden as the winter sun sinks down, so we stop for some pictures by Snetterton Circuit:

IMG_1138 by Skizzer, on Flickr

 

 

All this Roveriness is making me feel very We Happy Few, Keeping The Home Fires Burning in England’s Green and Pleasant Land, so I stop again by the war memorial at Elveden:

 

IMG_1144 by Skizzer, on Flickr

 

IMG_1141 by Skizzer, on Flickr

 

 

17.00

The only fault I can find with the car is the floppy driver’s door mirror that Wuvvum warned me about. It sits there ok for a while but starts to sag at motorway speed, so I effect a temporary repair with some Sellotape. That works fine and will do until I get around to a permanent repair (which will probably be exactly the same but with gaffer tape). Otherwise the journey back down the A11 and M11 is entirely uneventful – no steam, no bangs, no OMG DANGEROUS DEATHTRAP brake failure, just lots of wafting along at the speed limit in a comfy chair enjoying the smooth ride and the view. Unlike Dollywobbler’s Maverick, it even has a full quota of wheelnuts.

 

17.30

Ah, the North Circular. Traffic, lots of it, never actually stopping for more than a few seconds but barely moving either. I think the only sign of age on this car, apart from a few paintwork battle scars, is that there’s a lot of clutch travel before it bites; it won’t need attention for a while yet but you do notice it in this stop-start stuff. Meanwhile, for all I’m keeping an eye on the temperature gauge, there’s no sign of impending KV6 head gasket failure or any other cooling system issues.

 

I’m also beginning to realise that a Rover 75 is the antidote to road rage. What’s the hurry? I’m so relaxed just sitting here in my velour-lined, leather-topped, wood-panelled study. You, matey in your Passat, may get all stressed about the queues, but I can hardly get excited about being a few minutes late when this entire car has only just arrived from a sort of mythic version of 1959.

 

It’s remarkable that such a genuinely, deeply pleasant way to cover hundreds of miles can be had for £500. I bought this car because it's cheaper than having a towbar fitted to my daily driver Skoda (with all the electrics), and I needed to tow a trailer this week (which is another story), plus it means I can indulge the urge for some new shite that actually goes and stops, legally. I’m ahead as long as it survives the week, and on today’s performance I’m not worried.

 

18.30

Journey’s end – I’ve arrived back at the Richmond flat I’m in the process of moving out of. I’m not stiff, not tired, not stressed, and the seat’s so comfortable I don’t want to get out. In fact I’m looking forward to driving it home to Wales, and many miles more after that. Thanks Wuvvum. Nice car.

[ashmicro]

Big Rovers rocketh mightily. Well bought Sir.

[garethj]

That looks great, nice write up too. When I picked up my last bike I had more trouble with cancelled trains and replacement buses than the journey home on the ancient Honda.

 

Getting where you want to is for winnaz!

[HMC]

A great write up and some great pics. A sort of travelogue that Phil Llewellyn would do for CAR back in the day, always my favourite bit of that magazine. Looks like a nice car in a great colour. Only Shite points are from the cellotape wing mirror repair!

[scooters]

Phenomenal!

 

Top write up Martin! Looks like a really nice one and it's always nice to meet a fellow shitter. How is the teutonic Mrs Skizzer enjoying being wafted around in civilised British decor rather than the usual brutality of Hun engineered unsubtley.

 

look forward to seeing it and bagsy dibs when you flog it!

[Lord Sterling]

Excellent write up Skiz! I do like the Rover 75s, the replacement of the 800s/600s. Brilliant cars, I sincerely would love one one day, but I dont think thats really gonna happen.

[dollywobbler]

Lovely write up. I must get better at 'journey' write-ups. It's the little details that make it!

 

They are remarkably relaxing. I did three days at the NEC Classic Car Show, then drove the 160 odd miles home in my 75 and when I got out, it felt like I'd only just clambered in. Oddly, I did get twinges of backache (but I think that might just be my crap back) but always felt fresh when I got out.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I drove my Rover 1500 miles at the weekend, both me and it were loving it. Do I win £5?

[dollywobbler]

I drove my Rover 1500 miles at the weekend, both me and it were loving it. Do I win £5?

 

Only if you do an interesting write up that includes your eating habits and at least one scenic photograph. I'd quite like to read about your Rover-joy actually!

[AnthonyG]

Excellent write up Skiz! I do like the Rover 75s, the replacement of the 800s/600s. Brilliant cars, I sincerely would love one one day, but I dont think thats really gonna happen.

 

Why? it's not as if they are expensive now!

[wuvvum]

Glad you like the car - it is a very relaxing way to travel. I do like the shots on the A11 - very atmospheric with the setting sun. It's a good job you had a ride in the Rover of Doom when it was relatively dry and mild - now it's gone cold and horrible it's just wheelspinning everywhere, which is not as impressive...

[eddyramrod]

Now that's a write-up! Nothing happened, but still you make your day sound like something we want to relive with you. Glad you're pleased with the car.