Annoying flaws / design features.

[MK5 Escort]

Ford Ranger handbrake T bar lever ‘thing’ tucked away in the dashboard. What on earth is that all about? Took me five god-damn minutes to figure out where it was, yet alone work it, when I first driven one. Not only a dreadful piece of design, but I've driven two and neither handbrake seemed to have worked properly either.

 

Sticking to handbrakes - indeed, electronic handbrakes. Want to move your car a foot or two? You have to get in, start the car and psychically drive it forward/back. The nearly new A4 I regularly drive has one and as far as I’m aware, doesn’t have any sort of hill control e.t.c. So, when it comes to hill starts it means you either have to drop the clutch quickly and rocket up the hill, or face rolling back at very high speed into whatever is behind...

 

A lot of modern cars have crap water deflection thanks to no guttering. Open the door in the rain and a pile of water floods in and splashes into the car or onto your leg. Wonderful...

 

Oh yes, LHD wipers on RHD cars. This alone has put me off cars in the past...

 

Indeed, MPV-like A pillars on a lot of modern cars. Corsa, Astra Fiesta are just three that immediately come to mind. What’s the point of them...? It makes for dreadful visibility when cornering, particularly on roundabouts. What’s wrong with an A pillar between the windscreen and the front door frame? Why must we see an A pilliar that now incorporates a little bit of triangular glass amongst two thick pillars before the door?

 

Door mirrors attached to the door skins really do irritate me and seems to be increasingly common. They all just look like 'afterthoughts' to me...

[Pete-M]

  MK5 Escort said:

You have to get in, start the car and psychically drive it forward/back.

 

 

[eddyramrod]

CJ: yes, I was driving P/R plated Dailies, long and std wheelbase, all refrigerated and lined out. When the new ones arrived (R201-206 HCW) they'd been done with fibreglass and smelled of the stuff for weeks. Later we got a load of 3.5 and 4.5 tonne refrigerated box vans, 53-55 plates. I liked the 3.5 a hell of a lot! But no cup holders? C'mon Iveco! Some poor sod on minimum wage (and zero respect from above) has to live in this bugger for all day, let him have a soft drink without spilling it all over himself eh!

[tonedepear]

On the Impian, the one thing that would stop me ever having another is the bloody sun visors. Honestly. Most cars, the visors go roughly where you put them, and stay there. In the gImp, they have two positions. Down (almost vertically) and up. If you push them right against the window like normal sun visors, they ping back to their preferred down position. This is roughly half an inch below the level of my eyes, which means I have to duck to see under them. So they're either up, and I'm blinded by the sun, or down and I'm blinded by the visor. GAH.

 

Cup holders above the CD player. I'm looking at you, mr Saab 9-3 (the GM900 hatchback cavalier one). There's an idea, I'll put my drink where it'll piss sugary pop all over my cd player whenever I go over a speed bump. And if that's not enough, if I want to get the CD out, I'll have to take my drink out in the other hand first. Or more likely I'll press eject and then the CD will knock the ill-fitting cup out of the rubbish + flimsy cup holder and shower me in molten coffee. of course half of that will go straight in the ignition key seeing as that's down there too, but I won't moan about that cos it's quaint and I like it, assuming I've remembered to hoover it out before it gets too full of grot and I can't get the key in and end up stuck in John Lewis' multi story all day.

 

Also, the "blend" on the heater controls on the SAAB 90. Despite it having nearly a full 360 degrees of turn on the knob, with some trendy blue at one end to indicate cool fresh air, and red at the other to warn you of the lava inferno potential of the heating, the mixed knob in my experience is just an on off switch. Anywhere in the blue half is fresh air. Anything past half way will burn your face off and melt your glasses. So on cold days you basically freeze until you can't bear it any more, then cook yourself for 5 minutes, then go back to the blessed releif of being cold again. Basically like having the flu but comfier and the heated seat is dryer.

 

Lastly (and it's been a while, so I may be wrong) I think the Aston Martin DB4 had a handbrake down by the driver's door too - therefore any other car with the handbrake there is fucking awesome even if it does bash your shin/fettle your trousers/bum you on your way in or out of the car.

[Pete-M]

  tonedepear said:

Lastly (and it's been a while, so I may be wrong) I think the Aston Martin DB4 had a handbrake down by the driver's door too - therefore any other car with the handbrake there is fucking awesome even if it does bash your shin/fettle your trousers/bum you on your way in or out of the car.

 

Jag XJ-S's have the handbrake there too, a 'fly-off' one, which I suspect is what the Aston will have. They're not too bad as they lie flat whether on or off.

[tonedepear]

  Pete-M said:

  tonedepear said:

Lastly (and it's been a while, so I may be wrong) I think the Aston Martin DB4 had a handbrake down by the driver's door too - therefore any other car with the handbrake there is fucking awesome even if it does bash your shin/fettle your trousers/bum you on your way in or out of the car.

 

Jag XJ-S's have the handbrake there too, a 'fly-off' one, which I suspect is what the Aston will have. They're not too bad as they lie flat whether on or off.

 

Further confirmation that there's just nothing not to like about the XJS.

[ashmicro]

Black Alloy wheels. Why spend all that time, effort and money making it look like you're too lazy to clean your rimz, yo? Or as if you should have wheel trims and they've fallen off. Kack. That and flat paint on bodywork.

[scooters]

fuel filler pipe on the Mk1 VW Golf - made out of soluble asprin and positioned in such a place to ensure damp mud is trapped all round them 12 months a year - when they eventually fail loads of crud drops into the tank (tank out is an axle off job) and scres up your EFI/Carb etc

 

Rear seatbelts on the Mk1 Golf Convertible - why lapbelts???? no bloody use to anyone!

 

Wheel brarings on the same car - front ones are made out of frozen peas - seem to lunch themselves every 3000 miles

[j-j]

The Series 1 CX has better demist than the S2 it seems!

 

I was reminded lately that Xantias are quite good at putting rainwater in the boot when it drips off the rear hatch after you open it - it's almost genius the way it saves it up on the outside of the boot ready to tip it in when you put in shopping as well.

 

The position of the A pillars on a Mitsubishi Colt we had as a rental back in 2005 was ideal for not being able to see cars coming at ya when entering roundabouts.

 

Not really a design flaw as such: but what is it with some cars having fuel gauges that read a level even after the ignition is off? The Colt did this - how does this not drain the battery over several days parking?

[ashmicro]

  j-j said:

Not really a design flaw as such: but what is it with some cars having fuel gauges that read a level even after the ignition is off? The Colt did this - how does this not drain the battery over several days parking?

 

Some Fords use a PLL system (like a modern television)

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phase-locked_loop

[Barry Cade]

  j-j said:

 

Not really a design flaw as such: but what is it with some cars having fuel gauges that read a level even after the ignition is off? The Colt did this - how does this not drain the battery over several days parking?

 

older Fords were like this- ideal for TWOCcers to see which car had the most fuel for an evening of handbrake turns.

[j-j]

  ashmicro said:

  j-j said:

Not really a design flaw as such: but what is it with some cars having fuel gauges that read a level even after the ignition is off? The Colt did this - how does this not drain the battery over several days parking?

 

Some Fords use a PLL system (like a modern television)

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phase-locked_loop

 

Did the old ones use this open loop feedback system? I recall this stuff from Design Engineering but didn't think any older cars would use it for a fuel gauge sender! When I saw it on that Colt I just didn't like that one gauge stayed alive when the others powered off!

[myglaren]

^^One of our cars did that - probably daughter ~2's Sierra. Often wondered how that worked but never quite enough to bother finding out.

 

 

(was supposed to be a quote but buggered that up too - as usual )

[Pete-M]

  ashmicro said:

Black Alloy wheels. Why spend all that time, effort and money making it look like you're too lazy to clean your rimz, yo? Or as if you should have wheel trims and they've fallen off. Kack. That and flat paint on bodywork.

 

I absolutely love black alloy wheels. Put them on my Cosworth back in '96 and it looked the dogs danglies.

 

Along these lines, one thing I despise is people who colour code their alloys to match the car. Especially when it's done to Mk2 Escorts on RS alloys. It never looks good (unless it's black alloys on a black car, done well). It's up there with the morons who put "Cosworth Whaletail" spoilers on Capris and Rover SD1s. If I ran the world, people would be shot for that. Until very dead.

 

 

Another annoying design feature for the collection.

 

Space saver spare wheels. Understandable if the car has zero luggage capacity, Lancia Integrales are one car that it's a good idea on, and they have a space saver alloy that's the same style as the standard rim which is a cool touch, but my XJ has a bloody space saver and they've gone as far as to engineer the boot floor (above the spare) to have two positions - space saver and full size spare. There's barely an inch difference, but in 'full size' mode the boot floor lines up perfectly with the battery cover resulting in a flat load space. With it in space saver mode there's an inch step up to the battery box cover. Which looks crap.

 

Sierra injection fuel pump cut off switch. Have a puncture, fit the spare, drop the original wheel in the wheel well, car won't go because the cut off is in the spare wheel well. Just what you need.

[scooters]

  Pete-M said:

  ashmicro said:

Black Alloy wheels. Why spend all that time, effort and money making it look like you're too lazy to clean your rimz, yo? Or as if you should have wheel trims and they've fallen off. Kack. That and flat paint on bodywork.

 

I absolutely love black alloy wheels. Put them on my Cosworth back in '96 and it looked the dogs danglies.

 

Along these lines, one thing I despise is people who colour code their alloys to match the car. Especially when it's done to Mk2 Escorts on RS alloys. It never looks good (unless it's black alloys on a black car, done well). It's up there with the morons who put "Cosworth Whaletail" spoilers on Capris and Rover SD1s. If I ran the world, people would be shot for that. Until very dead.

 

 

on my bully boy 940 Sport Estate I had newly restored Volvo Galaxies painted in anthracite and they looked the fucking dogs with the maroon paintwork and the egg crate grill...

 

black alloys do look shit on a Saxo though especially if stupidly low profile

[Cavcraft]

Iveco Daily: Rubber floor mats and a bolt under the accelerator pedal which gets stucks in said mats. Not very handy when you're wellying it past slower vehicles and the throttle sticks.

[Guest]

  Cavette said:

Iveco Daily : FUCK

 

EFA.

[ashmicro]

Modern Renaults: everything between the front numberplate and the rear numberplate.

[Volksy]

The little rear quarterlight on the new Mercedes E class coupe, makes it look like a four door saloon which they have forgotten to fit the rear door handles to.

[jonny69]

Series 1 Renault Scenic. None of you bastards want to buy it so I'll slag it off instead.

 

Why is the steering wheel offset about 2" to the left? Why can't you put it in the middle so I don't get pains in my neck after driving it?

 

And then when you were designing the engine and you came to the oil filter (which is a small unit that fills up with about 200ml of black oil and has to be filled with new oil when it's replaced or the oil pump won't prime), why did you mount it sideways so you can't put it on without all its contents leaking down the side of the block and all over the undertray?

 

And all the controls are on one stalk with the horn in the end. So when you're properly pissed off with someone and mash the horn you switch on the lights, fogs and indicators and look like a complete spastic. FFS.

 

Oh wait, and the headlight units. Did Renault fit them first, before assembling the rest of the car around them? So I had to replace one because it got smashed. I took off the trim strip on the top which was partially clipped under the wings at each end so the tabs on the ends had to be snapped off. This exposed the screws on the top. Then the grille piece came off exposing the headlamp unit, theoretically allowing them to be pulled out the front. Except you can't get them out without taking the bumper off to get to the screws underneath, which means taking BOTH WINGS OFF. TO CHANGE THE SODDING HEADLIGHT UNIT! Suffice to say I chose to break the old unit to get it out and modify the new one so I could force it into place. I'd probably find I'd have to take the doors off to get the wings off, which in turn would need the headlining taking out or some other stupid shit like that.

[tonedepear]

Good call Jonny, you've reminded me of a similar Proton "feature". First of all, when building, they suspend both front fog/indicator lamp units on string from the roof of the factory, and then build the rest of the car around it. As per Scenic, I reckon you have to take the engine out to change the (corroded) front indicator bulb holder.

[Albert Ross]

Rather like a Capri heater matrix.

 

ICME times..... heater matrix replacement on a Sierra is the same time for LHD and RHD. So why do I have to drop a steering column and move the pedal box on the RHD, but on the LHD it falls unhindered into the footwell? Yeah, cheers ICME.. you lost me hundreds of quid in bonusses over the years..... twats.

[tonedepear]

  Albert Ross said:

Rather like a Capri heater matrix.

 

IIRC the Crapi blower motor was a similar chore.

[R9UKE]

Not sure if this has been mentioned yet.

 

Cars such as the Toyota Corolla, Avensis, Auris, certain new Vauxhalls in which the dash clocks are illuminated all the time making it look like the headlights are on to the driver. The fact that the speedo cannot be read is half the push for some dimwit drivers to turn their headlights on. If this particular model isn't equipped with auto headlights, it's not uncommon to see Dorothy tootling around in her Corolla being the only car on the road with no lights on. Not just annoying... dangerous.

[RoadworkUK]

  R9UKE said:

....the dash clocks are illuminated all the time making it look like the headlights are on to the driver.

 

My B5 A4 does that. When I first got the car I just assumed it was broken. Nope, just ill-considered.

[cobblers]

ON a mk2 golf GTi, the drivers seat is "height adjustable" from "same as the passenger seat" to "too high". It's completely useless unless you are an 85 year old woman.

 

The handle for it sticks out and up about 4" in front right of the seat , exactly next to where I put my foot to get in the car. Unless I'm wearing bicycle clips, I invariably hook my trouser leg over it and end up nearly falling in a heap onto the passengers lap.

[Volksy]

Japanese 2dr cars, where you let someone in the back through the drivers side, and the seat forgets all it's settings.

[Pete-M]

  Albert Ross said:

Rather like a Capri heater matrix.

 

ICME times..... heater matrix replacement on a Sierra is the same time for LHD and RHD. So why do I have to drop a steering column and move the pedal box on the RHD, but on the LHD it falls unhindered into the footwell? Yeah, cheers ICME.. you lost me hundreds of quid in bonusses over the years..... twats.

 

Eh? I replaced the matrix on a Sapphire in about 5 minutes. Slacken the heater box bolts, undo the pipes under the bonnet, dip the clutch pedal and it came straight out.

[Pete-M]

  RoadworkUK said:

  R9UKE said:

....the dash clocks are illuminated all the time making it look like the headlights are on to the driver.

 

My B5 A4 does that. When I first got the car I just assumed it was broken. Nope, just ill-considered.

 

They have a little "lights on" light on the dash so you can tell. Lots of modern stuff does it, I like it.

[myglaren]

  RoadworkUK said:

  R9UKE said:

....the dash clocks are illuminated all the time making it look like the headlights are on to the driver.

 

My B5 A4 does that. When I first got the car I just assumed it was broken. Nope, just ill-considered.

 

 

My BX did too - embarrassing driving out of a supermarket car park thinking the headlights are on and they aren't.