Vorsprung Durch Ticket (MOT) - Ohdearme’s turn of the century emporium

[Ohdearme]

Sorry been working in the train and deepest dark of beyond meant no signal before this happened.

Pez and manouvres 

[Ohdearme]

An excellent roffle win, top shiter etc.

car has only moved from trailer to garage so this is its first run out. 

Top of gear stick was worn due to 90,000 miles of no doubt ragging the tits off the little fella so I was left wondering how fifth would be for the motorway, on the Punto Sporting they were geared very short with a gulf to top where all forward momentum was lost...It seems Fiat solved this by removing the fifth cog from the box altogether.

As a result, a sat nav indicated 70 is achieved at a pleasant* 5400 rpm.

Steering is a bit wayward, drags heavy to the left and at low speeds it tries to steer into the ditch - Is like to think it’s by design and the Italians weighted it to be driven one handed with an espresso in the other but I suspect some tracking issues may be at work.

Nothing else to report, it t is zingy and hilarious and has already been typically fiat on me - putting the passenger window down to let some air resulted in the window seal making a break for it at motorway speeds - thankfully it fell in not out.

has a bit of an oily burn on exhaust smell but that may just be from being idle a while:

Also cornflies bloody love it.

marvelous thing..

[Ohdearme]

It has arrived home and is outside cowering from the wife.

Spent  an age rattling trim, coasting revs and switching fan blowers about to find a squeak then stuck my window down and realised the squeak is most likely coming from drivers wheeel bearing.

not to worry, I think I can afford some consumables as it’s only cost me £6 and a train ticket so far.

[BertiePuntoCabrio]

£6 well spent!

Glad you got back ok although probably deaf by now! 

Have fun and hope Mrs ODM will eventually like it!

[GrumpiusMaximus]

5 hours ago, Ohdearme said:

Sorry been working in the train and deepest dark of beyond meant no signal before this happened.

Pez and manouvres 

 

IMG_6146.MOV 21.07 MB · 1 download

Lady Grumpius' sister has one of these.  Only car she's ever owned and she absolutely loves it.  Cracking buy.

[Ohdearme]

Had a few days with the yellow fella to acquaint ourselves, first job when the post arrives is to pop a new rocker gasket on, as the obvious source of burnt oil smell was detected.

Also refilled the screen wash once I’d figured out where the hell the filler was but no fluids were present, no pump noise either and many hoses to nowhere so added to the list.

perils of a yellow car. Bought some flexi builders buckets from toolstation, put them down on roof, took an hour to find them.

All good so far and kids love the thing, although on arriving home tonight after a trip...it has all gone very Italian on me.

Need some investigating.

[gadgetgricey]

at least the fans work though.

[Ohdearme]

I was still trying to puzzle the gearbox as every listing of seicento Sportings has them as five speed and lo and behold this morning completely by accident I managed to slip it into fifth!!

I have had some non-communicative gearboxes in my time but by some margin, this is the worst. So bad that for the next three times I tried to get it back in to fifth I couldn’t find it again

The mini trip I was on where I found fifth was to sue it as a van.

200kg of building sand, no problem. Not quite the 800kg I stuffed in the V70 but it got a bit more garden wall built today.

 

[PhilA]

While not designed for it really, 80 in my Cinq was 4200RPM- I don't think the 1.1 has too different ratios from the 899 so the tach may be off? It ran out of steam at about 85 on the speedo in 5th, about 4500rpm which was a dead spot on the cam. Knocking it into 4th and getting to 90 then back into 5th would see it off the end off the gauge...

 

That's the way to have to do a head gasket at 45,000 miles though.

 

Fun little cars. The inner track rod bushings (attached to the rack, not a changeable item) go stiff with age and make the steering crappy. Surprisingly nimble if you can get over the comedic amounts of body roll. With the seats down they do a tardis thing and will accept much more junk in the back than you'll think possible.

 

Verdict: 8/10 especially in Broom Yellow

[Matty]

God this forum is wasted on me. How the feck did I not see this up for roffle?? Top fun for little money well jealous

[Ohdearme]

I’m in love with the little thing, it is hilarious to drive and I appear to be 18 again, throwing it at roundabouts and country lanes, heel and toeing and generally pissing myself.

to passers by it’s probably a bit like the Father Ted milk float episode but it feels a hundred miles an hour inside!

Fixed the burnt oil smell with 2 cans of brake cleaner and a new rocker gasket. Should probably have put a bit of cardboard on the drive before cleaning but hindsight and all that...

Apparently you can chuck a cam in from a Punto to give a 5 or so Bhp  increase so but no rush to do any mechanicals yet beyond an oil change and general spruce up.

 

[Ohdearme]

Predictably minor disaster as kids managed to scooter into the wing ?

A dent kit was ordered and last night was spent faffing about to fix that and other minor body dents.

Made some improvements, not perfect but a bit better.

 

 

[BertiePuntoCabrio]

Yayyy! The little chap is looking good!

[Ohdearme]

13 minutes ago, BertiePuntoCabrio said:

Yayyy! The little chap is looking good!

It’s had a significant amount of Italian tune ups since purchase!

[BertiePuntoCabrio]

3 minutes ago, Ohdearme said:

It’s had a significant amount of Italian tune ups since purchase!

The only way to drive them!

[bangernomics]

Former Mrs b had a ceitento (spelling) as a present from new in 1995, Remember driving it none stop from manc to Paris a week after buying it. At year 4 OMGHGF which was easily resolved.

Ex MiL ran it to the grand old age of 23 before it was shipped off to its final resting place. (Yes I kept in touch with them)

[Crackers]

AWESOME. I want it. That is all.

[Ohdearme]

This thing is like a little yellow lump of happy. I've had a shit day and not been able to shake the grumpiness.

Decided about ten o clock to just go for a drive, nothwithstanding being in my 'jamas and was grinning away like a madman as soon as I hit the country lanes and redlined the thing and feel so much better after fifteen minutes of those roads, boy can it handle.

I also think it's because the engine whine as it revs lets me pretend i'm blasting around in some kind of straight cut gearbox monster (cover your ears).

 

A rummage through the delights of the history folder show the little fella has had a fairly well cared for.

Although to be fair, making a smoll fiat do 90-odd thousand miles is going to result in a lot of things falling off that need replacing.

In the last 5 years it's had a new back box and two (?) front pipes, new rear shocks, battery, and a bunch of other stuff.

No sign of a timing belt so that will be getting done and attention is probably required on the MOT advisory stuff

1. Oil Leak - Already fixed with the gasket

2. Front brake discs corroded

3. Corrosion to underbody

4. Coil springs corroded

5. Rear axle corroded Panda-esque problem?

6. Rear brake binding

And to add to that - handbrake totally shite, although perhaps it's related to 6.

 

I'll get underneath and see how bad the rust is and then set about sorting it out.

 

[Burnside]

Every small Fiat I've ever owned suffered.

1. Oil leak's.

2. Rust

3. Crap handbrakes. 

Would I recommend one though, yes!

As you say they always put a smile on your face and feel twice as fast as they are. 

Poor handbrakes are usually just down to rear shoes/ adjusters.

On the Seicento, it's worth checking out the inner rear wheel arches / boot floor corners for rust too. 

There plenty of scope for upgrades on these. I've even seen a couple with the 1.4 16v engine squeezed in. ?

An here a excuse to show my first Fiat. 

A £95 Mot failure Uno 45s. 

 

[Ohdearme]

5 hours ago, Burnside said:

Every small Fiat I've ever owned suffered.

1. Oil leak's.

2. Rust

3. Crap handbrakes. 

Would I recommend one though, yes!

As you say they always put a smile on your face and feel twice as fast as they are. 

Poor handbrakes are usually just down to rear shoes/ adjusters.

On the Seicento, it's worth checking out the inner rear wheel arches / boot floor corners for rust too. 

There plenty of scope for upgrades on these. I've even seen a couple with the 1.4 16v engine squeezed in. ?

An here a excuse to show my first Fiat. 

A £95 Mot failure Uno 45s. 

 

Agree with the above.

There’s some signs of rust on the inner rear arch inside so I’ll have a good poke about and once I’ve figured out how cosmetic or otherwise the rust is, I’ll slap a new set of shoes, discs, pads on it.

This is an early seicento so the 1.4 is a complex change and apparently buggers the handling. The 1.2 8v from a Punto is a common swap more for the extra torque than than anything else.

we've only two cars in the fleet at present so pulling out engines would be frowned upon (let alone a donor Punto being stripped on the drive) so I’ll content myself with filters and fluids for now.

[uk_senator]

On 8/19/2020 at 6:57 AM, Ohdearme said:

Agree with the above.

There’s some signs of rust on the inner rear arch inside so I’ll have a good poke about and once I’ve figured out how cosmetic or otherwise the rust is, I’ll slap a new set of shoes, discs, pads on it.

we've only two cars in the fleet at present so pulling out engines would be frowned upon (let alone a donor Punto being stripped on the drive) so I’ll content myself with filters and fluids for now.

I just decided to check the reg to see how the last MOT went & was somewhat disappointed to see its no longer with us, what happened Mr Ohdearme? 

[Ohdearme]

3 minutes ago, uk_senator said:

I just decided to check the reg to see how the last MOT went & was somewhat disappointed to see its no longer with us, what happened Mr Ohdearme? 

Despite it being a marvelous fillip for lockdown blues, it was never going to get past the mot with anything approaching a clean bill of health as the underside was very crusty and not being a tickle sticker wasn’t viable for me to do up. It also needed a new screenwash gubbins, rusting at the seatbelt mounts, a née battery and some other stuff on top.

Car take back came up with £140 and at the time in the depths of Corona-induced dramas with kids homeschooling, it was the easiest thing to load it up and say goodbye.

Genuinely  sad I killed it but at the time was at my mental limit across a number of fronts and the little yells feller took the hit as I couldn’t spend time on it and have no indoor fettling space when it was freezing outside.

I’ll hand in my badge, etc.

[uk_senator]

2 minutes ago, Ohdearme said:

Despite it being a marvelous fillip for lockdown blues, it was never going to get past the mot with anything approaching a clean bill of health as the underside was very crusty and not being a tickle sticker wasn’t viable for me to do up. It also needed a new screenwash gubbins, rusting at the seatbelt mounts, a née battery and some other stuff on top.

Car take back came up with £140 and at the time in the depths of Corona-induced dramas with kids homeschooling, it was the easiest thing to load it up and say goodbye.

Genuinely  sad I killed it but at the time was at my mental limit across a number of fronts and the little yells feller took the hit as I couldn’t spend time on it and have no indoor fettling space when it was freezing outside.

I’ll hand in my badge, etc.

I see. I`ve also had to sack off some of my babies in the last year, thanks to the situation, so I really do understand. 

R.I.P. lil yella. 💛

[Ohdearme]

15 minutes ago, uk_senator said:

I see. I`ve also had to sack off some of my babies in the last year, thanks to the situation, so I really do understand. 

R.I.P. lil yella. 💛

I had it marked as a keeper but just too much shot to cope with tbh, just need the lockdown lifted so I can justify buying something new to play with.

[Ohdearme]

So this appeared on my drive this evening.

2.0 tdi of the 175horses kind, not the grenading 2.2 or the twat to work on 3.0.

full service history and just in time to get me to hospital for my appointments whilst Mrs ODM uses 323 for the school runs.

timely big bus purchase with local travel restrictions buggering  off  soon - my national trust membership is in for a pounding in the next few months

 

[Ohdearme]

Decided to look into the engine idle issues properly on the Mazda as it actually stalled on me the other day.

Not really sure what I’m suspecting as the coolant header tank was empty, the rad is full, the temp gauge is normal and there’s no Mayo on the dipstick - oil is as golden as honey.

First checked all the leads were sparking - all ok.

Then checked for air leaks - All ok.

Then pulled the plugs for a nosey, a little bit of oil above them and cylinders 1&2 looked a bit sooty.

Can’t remember when I changed the plugs last so went and got a set this morning to change the over. Naturally, when I came to change them, the plug now looked pretty normal on removal 😕 

However, on checking all the connections to the leads at the dizzy end, one came away in my hand.

Fortunately, I had spare but known good old leads I’d taken off the other 323 in case of a failure so C as this so swapped over and then restarted the car.

still much wobbly on the idle so I unplugged the maf and it then started to idle roughly in a completely new way so at least the mad is kind of functioning.

Took off the maf and blasted it through with brake cleaner in case of detritus and set it back in place once dry. Still no dice and the same idle wobble. It seems to have improved and sits still but the coughs once in a while.

Coolant is staying level, it isn’t spitting out the rad  under compression and the exhaust has a ‘put-put-put’ idle wobble.

Heater still blows hot and cold on demand and temp sits firmly in the middle. I guess I need to do a compression test of the cylinders or maybe it’s injectors? It’s very sooty

Advice welcome.

As for the Espace...

Have done around 1000 miles in the espace and it seems to be doing rather well as a family cruise bus. Big, comfy and the 2.0 engine is actually pleasant to bumble along in.

However, I hit a speed bump a bit hrs and suspect I’ve snapped a bit of a spring or some other suspension but as there’s a definite rattle on anything except billiard smooth road.

A cursory look underneath showed all droplinky bits and pieces still in place so it’ll be off to the garage for them to investigate further due to my fear of spring compressors.

also at Arley Hall yesterday, I noticed a distinctly mechanical burnt smell, I suspected it was my left rear brake sticking but as there were a million giffers around, I couldn’t rule out multiple codgers burning their micra clutches out in such a tight car park.

However, pit stop at hearts head moor for an ice cream confirmed the drivers side rear brake is binding slightly.  so that’s two things on the renner.

Big car in shit at hide and seek shocker.

 

 

[Ohdearme]

Absolutely nothing of note has happened to the fleet of late.

The Espace continues to go along, it needed a new suspension mount as it had popped through over a speed bump but other than that no issues.

Wife's Honda Vajazzle is going fine with the only hiccup being me reversing it into a bollard...

So why the update?

Just before Christmas I awoke to find a quad bike minus a front wheel abandoned outside the house. It would seem either a scrote has been out and about without their mum's permission and crashed it quite heavily, or it has been 'borrowed' by another type of scrote.

Anyhow - A rummage in the bushes found the wheel and a chunk of the hub that had come off with it, so I wheeled the lot to safety and pondered.

A few weeks on Facebook without reply, I did the honest thing and phoned the Vin through to plod to see if it had been reported stolen.

A visit from a couple of friendly PCSOs later, we agreed it should be logged as 'found property' and if nobody claimed it after 28 days (now long gone) it is indeed now mine!

It's a Kayo Fox 70cc kids quad, they fetch about £800 new but parts are pleasingly dirt cheap so I've set about getting it going again for the kids to try and kill themselves on it.

Main issues of note

- It's taken a hit so hard the left hub has sheared off.

- One of the handlebar mounts has sheared off - probably same impact as the hub

- Ignition has been mullered and there's no key

- Bodywork is cracked to bits (don't care)

- Throttle control has been snapped off

- Recovered wheel rim has a big dent in the rim (won't matter for the kid's speeds)

 

I would imagine whoever crashed this thing had broken a couple of ribs at best, I don't put much faith in Chinese castings but it must have been some wallop.

No doubt costs will escalate but to start with I've ordered a new ignition barrel and key for the sake of £20 and got the battery on charge

It's one of these so looking forward to getting it going

 

 

[Ohdearme]

In the absence of anything interesting happening to the fleet, the Espace keeps going and the Jazz does the same, I’ve decided to merge two activities together.

There we’re no takers for the quad bike and the kids have no use of it so ive decided to borrow the chairs and running gear to improve the little race car project I never finished from lockdown.

I reckon the rear axle and engine can stay where they are on the quad and a bit of cut and shut can move the front axle forward to get me something Lotus 18/25 ish looking for the kids to risk near death in.

Will no doubt need some head scratching and I do need to make some space in the garage by clearing out skirting boards and various household jobs first.

 

Before you get too excited, it’s unlikely I’ll be converting the quad to independent throttle bodies though  

[Ohdearme]

Seems the 90’s are my soft spot and after languishing as a forgotten thread, absent of any mechanised metal of note, it is celebration time as a new car was delivered this fine evening…

Starts and drives, albeit stoops very quickly off throttle as the front brakes are seized so they will be getting whipped off first.

looks fairly solid in the main…wonder what this bit belongs to?

No mayo in the coolant…although looking at how black it is, you’d be forgiven for mistaking it for Brent crude!

Smoll engine, is smoll shocker.

brakes stuff a bit crusty all round

some wires

Yes…about those mix tapes!

Kids already want to be taken to school in it!

 

 

 

[Ohdearme]

It’s not raining this morning so going to poke about and see what jobs need doing.

- Front brakes seized
- Remove whatever those wires were
- Look underneath for crustification
- Passenger door won’t lock
- Wipers don’t work
- Front seats heavily worn out
- No pads on the tiny pedals inside
- investigate the brake pipes
- Investigate the pile of rust that is the master cylinder and possibly replace.
- Speakers are very crackly!
- Spit and polish all round
- Flush coolant and replace
- Put a code reader on to see if it even has an ecu…
- I imagine oil, plugs and filter might be in order after 47 years in storage.