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Shagged XJS - GOT THE MOVES LIKE JAGUAR. NOW with inept attempts to start after one year on its bum

Guest Breadvan72

By Guest Breadvan72
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Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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Your front yard will look like some BL/Brit Car porno shot.

 

Or a knackers's yard.  Delete as applicable.

Dippy Rank: BL Wedge

Dippy

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I do love these cars but just don't like to own things I can't fix myself so I keep to more simple steeds.

 

Got to admit that's a mighty fine collection of chod you have, a dolly SD1 and XJS are all cars I would love to own.

Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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That lower left gauge will not remain on max for long.

 

 

Don' make me get all Setright on yo' ass, Herr Junkenmeister.

Magnificent Rustbucket Rank: Renault 16

Magnificent Rustbucket

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That looks fantastic. My favourite XJ-S is the early one - but I think Jaguar may have hit another high spot with this model. It has most of the advantages of the face lift, but without the horrible plastic bumpers.

 

I love the XJ-S. They have a wonderful feel to them which was lost on the later Jags. In 4 litre guise they shouldn't be expensive to run either - my Sovereign of the same age averages in the early 20s of miles to the gallon - and the mechanical parts shouldn't be troublesome. They're fairly simple cars really, there is just a lot of it. Fingers crossed about the rot!

Magnificent Rustbucket Rank: Renault 16

Magnificent Rustbucket

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That lower left gauge will not remain on max for long.

 

 

A cruel passenger in my Jag once referred to the fuel gauge as the 'depreciation gauge'. The rotter!

Clanger Rank: BL Wedge

Clanger

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Right! Enough is enough, I am coming over there right now to put an end to all of these shenanigans. SFO waiting for my flight.

Partridge Rank: Renault 16

Partridge

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Nice! I approve...You've bought that at the right time, I think.

 

By the way, I've just seen this thread. Is it not too late to rub shit in my hair or have I missed the boat?

  • barefoot and Magnificent Rustbucket
  • Like 2
Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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Right! Enough is enough, I am coming over there right now to put an end to all of these shenanigans. SFO waiting for my flight.

 

 

Your Martini will be waiting.  Olive or twist?

Clanger Rank: BL Wedge

Clanger

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Dirtier the better. Fucking cheapskate United lounge doesn't do complimentary drinks.... Wankers.

fred Rank: Renault 16

fred

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An XJS is on my bucket list. A friend of mine in Perth had a ridiculously nice V12 with a fucking huge sub woofer on the back seat. He sold it recently for $20,000 so they're definitely much cheaper in good old blightly.

 

PS, I was born in '92 - all you guys IS WELL OLD.

Fucking kids today - just outta nappies man! get back to your rusks :-D :-D :-D

Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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Proceeds of Crime (innit).  Bear in mind that I have bought five ace and cool (but probably borkey) cars for less than the price of one brand new nondescript family modern.   Insurance costs relative buttons, tax relative buttons, and two are soon to be tax free.  Maintenance and fuel, shedloads.   I now be almost skinty oot, but have a chunk put by to buy new arches and paint for the Shaguar.   

 

The Jag and the Lotus are the two most likely to fuck me over, but Baby, when it comes to love, if it ain't rough it isn't fun.  

Clanger Rank: BL Wedge

Clanger

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As Rumpole said "crime doesn't pay, but it's a living"

Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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I only do civil law, acting for the Government and for corporations.  In other words, the real Crims!

  • Junkman, Magnificent Rustbucket and Twiggy
  • Like 3
Clanger Rank: BL Wedge

Clanger

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In your case then crime pays handsomely.

 

I used to represent the cream of society* till I got fucked off with not getting paid...

garethj Rank: Isuzu Florian

garethj

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I only do civil law, acting for the Government and for corporations.  In other words, the real Crims!

I think the only surprise is how you managed to sneak an hour off to collect the car as you're that busy.

 

Nice pics of the trip home, the car in its natural surroundings with the gin etc.  How does it drive?

 

When I had my V12 and was burning off another yobo at the lights I always wished I had a glass of G&T in my hand.  As he was hunched over the wheel of his chavmobile making racing gearchanges with a fierce look on his face I really wanted to glance over with a smile, lift an eyebrow as Roger Moore would have done and say "cheers" with a glass in my hand as I left him in a haze of dust and unburnt hydrocarbon emissions.

  • Sir Snipes, alf892, Magnificent Rustbucket and 7 others
  • Like 10
Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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The true test of any car is whether you can drive it fast without spilling your cocktail.   This one drives lovely.  It feels modernish, but also quite old school bruisy British.   I said to my wife (who, like me, mourns for our lost Fabboceptor) that the Jag's got Fab shocks, Fab tyres, Fab motor - a 244 inch plant, and runs good on regular gas.  Is it the new Fabmobile, or what?   She told me to get the cigarette lighter fixed.

  • richardthestag, mercrocker, Coprolalia and 6 others
  • Like 9
barefoot Rank: Lancia Gamma

barefoot

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...She told me to get the cigarette lighter fixed.

 

Surely it's a cigar lighter in a waft mobile?

Justin Case Rank: Renault 16

Justin Case

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The true test of any car is whether you can drive it fast without spilling your cocktail. 

You are LJK Setright AICMFP.

  • Banger Kenny
  • Like 1
the judge Rank: Citroen Ami

the judge

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You are the winnar. What a line up. BV makes a lot of sense. 3 or 5 series new,a major depreciating asset. Lots of old smokers,nest egg in waiting. Clever chap

  • alf892 and Justin Case
  • Like 2
red5 Rank: Lancia Gamma

red5

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Stunning old chap. Will have to wander down and peruse the collection. Possibly a small libation in a local hostelry.

 

Just to be sociable.

Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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You are the winnar. What a line up. BV makes a lot of sense. 3 or 5 series new,a major depreciating asset. Lots of old smokers,nest egg in waiting. Clever chap

 

 

Also endless fixage bills and simultaneous borkery.

 

Meanwhile, I have been visiting  an Autoshiter of repute....

 

 

post-5528-0-14913900-1438165258_thumb.jpg

skattrd Rank: Lancia Gamma

skattrd

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Nice Jag man, and the above pic. is definitely a calendar contender

Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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Cheers!  Six Cylinder may have some better shots of the same scene of shame.

skattrd Rank: Lancia Gamma

skattrd

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It's just a shame the view is being spoilt by that Range Rover.

Six-cylinder Rank: Talbot Tagora

Six-cylinder

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It's just a shame the view is being spoilt by that Range Rover.

About as pretty as my Dustbins, never ask a lawyer to do a photographers job!

 

And your right he never said he would include all the electricity in the battery with the deal……..

 

P1320794%20broad_zps0qmao9sp.jpg

  • Skizzer, Banger Kenny, anonymous user and 1 other
  • Like 4
Guest Breadvan72

Guest Breadvan72

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Chuh!  Read the small print, dude!

  • Six-cylinder
  • Like 1

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