Awful Accessories

[Junkman]

I have never added an accessory to any of my cars, but removed a lot of them.

Do I have to seek therapy?

[Novanick1]

bad accessorie = welded on gear knob 

[R9UKE]

How has nobody mentioned the latest craze of Poundland LED running lights which are being added to Ssangyongs and old Renault Espaces in their thousands around here when daddy cool has a mid life crisis and can't afford an Audi.

[mercrocker]

Is that where they get the fucking things?    Some mong in a shit Transit barged through a gap I left for somebody to pull out from a side road  and he had  them glued to  the unrusted parts of his van.   He obviously is saving up for an Aldi so he can drive like a proper dick....

[Hendry]

Those Fischer boxes still exist, only for CDs rather than cassettes, some mk4 Astras had them (I had one in mine - better than the big cubby hole in the console) and the 2005 - 2012 Merc A class.

 

I remember my dad buying a Moss Security alarm for his Maestro City, had a box thing which sat on top of the dash and a black/red and a white/red one button remote and had been wired wrong so for a few seconds after the engine was started itd go off ( beeee ooooh eeeeh ooooh eeeeh ooooh)

 

The other things I remember are rear window decals, my neighbour would get one for every car he bought, it had a load of lines on it like a heater rear window (before cars were fitted with them, mk1 Fiestas, early mk3 Escorts etc) but in the middle in the same sort of material/same colour as heated rear window elements It said in capital letters ESCORT or FIESTA.

 

also other people had ones in white outline of a spiky haired guy standing in a vest with his fingers in his ears.

 

chavs with souped up cars with naff slogans along the top of the rear window like ON A MISSION or NO FEAR or OAKLEY/KENWOOD/PIONEER

 

Cars with locks not integrated into the handles would have these things stuck on the door paintwork round the lock with the car manufacturers logo on them.

 

Finally, and definitely more my generation, Lexarse lights, copy M3 door mirrors, "chrome spinner" style wheel trims.

[Pete-M]

I remember buying one of these yonks ago...

 

 

Rattled like fuck, opened by itself on a bumpy road and developed a 'droop' which would often cause the tapes to end up on the floor at random intervals. GR1 for road safety as I scrabbled about trying to stop Number of the Beast disappearing under the passenger seat while negotiating a roundabout.

I've got a set of unused C-boxes here somewhere.

[Negative Creep]

Couple of current accessories which mark out those vehicles so adorned as owned by imbeciles - 

 

 

 

 

[retrogeezer]

what is the point of those door protectors? All they do is protect the sides of other peoples cars in car parks leaving your door scratched underneath it in the process!

[Faker]

Nah man. Check this shit out!

Cortina is stunning, and I know it's a period accessory, but it just doesnt do it for me.

[R9UKE]

Oh but they complete the look of a Citroen CX

[Faker]

Oh but they complete the look of a Citroen CX

I'll leave this here then. It is about the only car other than an esprit that can pull it off as the cx is completely bonkers.

[Junkman]

Remember those miserable OAP auxiliary brake lights in the rear windows?

 

 

Usually they were combined with these crocheted bog roll protectors:

 

 

and a crocheted cushion like this:

 

 

Marvellous.

[vulgalour]

I want an Autoplas rear window louvre for the Princess but given the cost and the likely fact that Autoplas never made one specifically for the Princess I am instead resigned to trying to figure out how to make one myself.  I've also got plans for a suitable 70s colour scheme crochet blanket to replace the pink tartan, because I can make that sort of crap myself.

 

Those auxiliary lights are a thing of myth and legend to me, that's the first time I've ever seen a picture of a set.  Bonus points for the inclusion of another oap tat stalwart in the form of sheepskin seat covers so you don't have to suffer the indignity of ice cold/molten rock vinyl seats in that same photograph.

[oman5]

I'd buy that one

[Tetleysmooth]

Oh for fuck's sake.

 

 

 

 

I still see these things on cars now.

[Richard]

what is the point of those door protectors? All they do is protect the sides of other peoples cars in car parks leaving your door scratched underneath it in the process!

 

They are useful if your regular parking place is near a wall and your passengers can't be relied on to open the door carefully. I used to buy the long clear ones that looked less offensive and protected more of the door.

[Cavcraft]

I quite like window louvres on the right car.

 

Modern alloys on old cars (especially Fords) look absolutely gopping 99% of the time, I just don't get why people do it, it ruins the look of a perfectly nice car.

[Bucketeer]

 

 

For those who are too tight to buy a BIG BOAR EGZORST for their Saxo 1.1 but still want to look like the kind cocktard that would.

[face]

The other things I remember are rear window decals, my neighbour would get one for every car he bought, it had a load of lines on it like a heater rear window (before cars were fitted with them, mk1 Fiestas, early mk3 Escorts etc) but in the middle in the same sort of material/same colour as heated rear window elements It said in capital letters ESCORT or FIESTA.

 

also other people had ones in white outline of a spiky haired guy standing in a vest with his fingers in his ears.

 

 

 

And Fido Dido?

 

[retrogeezer]

Oh for fuck's sake.

 

 

 

 

I still see these things on cars now.

Yeh, me and Trigger have them!

[John F]

I used to hate these bloody things with a passion:

 

Not the Mk 3 Escort – the "tailblazer" thing that went where the numberplate used to go, meaning that the actual numberplate got bolted on at the bottom like an afterthought and made the styling of the car look a decade or so older.

 

These bloody things were EVERYWHERE, and probably accounted for a sizeable increase in the value of Halfords shares in the late 1980s. Hideous, pointless tat.

[UmBongo]

Oh for fuck's sake.

 

 

 

 

I still see these things on cars now.

 

My brother still has his fake Garfield.

It was never on a car though, he just thought it was a cuddly toy to stick to a cupboard or summat.

[Cavcraft]

I got one of those rear window scripts for my 306 and it looks nothing less than 143% snazzy. Yeah, snazzy. Deal with or stay jelly.

[Junkman]

I remember those 'Kenwood' and 'Pioneer' scripts across the windows, so in a full car park, one could spot from a distance which cars to break into.

[Station]

Those red rubbery windscreen wiper covers, and attached 'louvres'.

 

[Spiny Norman]

[Partridge]

Think about how much you save if you didn't buy them at all.

[Junkman]

Think about how much you save if you didn't buy them at all.

 

What???

[Junkman]

Something that thankfully never really caught on in Yeeroop:

 

[Spiny Norman]

I remember yonks ago my old auntie had a pair of these lovely beige clip-on picnic trays in her old Corsair. I just looked them up on Ebay and would you look at the price of them now?  Jeezussss...

 

http://www.ebay.com/itm/TABLE-CLIP-IN-WINDOW-PICNIC-VW-SPLIT-OVAL-TYP1-PORSCHE-356-MB-190-300-SL-NOS-/370913876151?pt=Vintage_Car_Truck_Parts_Accessories&hash=item565c3098b7&vxp=mtr