AS in the community: Cannock Motor Auctions

[Six-cylinder]

I am afraid of commitment, but you lot do seem surprisingly attractive!

[chaseracer]

I'm upgrading myself. Is it half ten we're aiming for?

 

Half nine onward at the Truckers Rest (WS11 1SF) on the A5, 10.45*-ish at TEH OKSHUNS (WS11 1PU).

 

* EDIT.

[chaseracer]

...you lot do seem surprisingly attractive!

 

You've met us, and you STILL say this??!?

 

[Pillock]

Are we gaming? If we're gaming it needs to be just prior to 11am to get a look over all the fine* vehicles on offer before they start filling the shed with the smell of death.

[sofarsogood]

Sloth in a Bowl

chaseracer

Cleon-Fonte

bub2006

andy18s

dollywobbler

Pillock (#1 daughter permitting)

The Granadaland Greenhouse Gassersâ„¢

Heidel_Kakao

sofarsogood

 

Don't know if I will be able to make the Truckers. I will be in works modern, I wonder* how I will find you guys.

[bub2006]

Im out.

[Six-cylinder]

I am in.

[Inspector Morose]

I'm shaking it all about.

[Sloth in a bowl]

I'll print off some game sheets. Gaming is on...

[Sloth in a bowl]

 

Sloth in a Bowl

chaseracer

Cleon-Fonte

bub2006

andy18s

dollywobbler

Pillock (#1 daughter permitting)

The Granadaland Greenhouse Gassersâ„¢

Heidel_Kakao

sofarsogood

 

Don't know if I will be able to make the Truckers. I will be in works modern, I wonder* how I will find you guys.

 

 

We will turn up at 10:45 in a cavacade of shite and park hard right of the carpark entrance.

 

After 11:00, you will find us in the exit end of the shed of shame. The real buyers are at the entrance end to smell sweet HGF before it reaches the block.

I'm the one writing numbers into the cheap shit 4 pages of A4 catalog that they sell.

Chaseracer is the one looking like he picked a bad choice, again.

Pillock is giggling gleefully into his phone as he reads the MoT fail lists. Mrs Pillock giggling gleefully as she beats her husband, again.

Junkman will wear strange trousers and the auctioneer will be looking at us like he wants to throw us out, but doesn't have a legitimate reason to.

[bub2006]

Like the time we tried to talk lord sterling into a rover. We all got told off

[chaseracer]

I think they miss us when we're not there.

[chaseracer]

I'm shaking it all about.

 

THIS is how we'll get thrown out...!

[Pillock]

Pillock's Auction Tips:

 

Don't worry if you get hungry. There's a burger wagon.

Try to make sure you have toilet roll handy at home, and plan out some emergency bog stops on the way home.

 

Look at the car, don't listen to what the auctioneer calls it. The two often don't match.

 

Don't be alarmed if you apparently bid on something. The shed is haunted and there are figures there that only the auctioneer can see. They bid on loads of stuff, often when stood right behind you.

 

Bonus points are awarded for choosing a car in the game that has no MOT, so you should select as many as you can.

[Junkman]

 

Sloth in a Bowl

chaseracer

Cleon-Fonte

bub2006

andy18s

dollywobbler

Pillock (#1 daughter permitting)

The Granadaland Greenhouse Gassersâ„¢

Heidel_Kakao

sofarsogood

 

Don't know if I will be able to make the Truckers. I will be in works modern, I wonder* how I will find you guys.

 

 

Y NO GHOSTY?

 

If there is a place to get Ghosty on wheels, this is it!

[billyboy406v6]

Are you nearly there yet ?????????????????

[Pillock]

Game on ladies and gents! Eyes down for a full house of rust.

 

Just had an MoTed 2001 Fiesta Flight for £50.....

[Sloth in a bowl]

Today's Cannock Catalog of clapped out chod, we were most disturbed to see a whole section of cars that made 4 figure sums. I hope this does not become the norm.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[hairnet]

what was wrong with the a2 for 325

[Shep Shepherd]

If you overlook the fact that they are 'Dame Edna' models (urgh) and diesels (double urgh), the 57-plate Saab 9-5s seem pretty bargainous.

[SiC]

If you overlook the fact that they are 'Dame Edna' models (urgh) and diesels (double urgh), the 57-plate Saab 9-5s seem pretty bargainous.

The 9-3 wasn't too badly priced either.

 

I mean what possibly could go wrong with a cheap, leggy Saab?

 

.... Oh wait.

[Sloth in a bowl]

what was wrong with the a2 for 325

 

Their was something odd with the front undertray piece, but overall it was just slightly tatty all over. 

[Pillock]

Lot 69 had a Bluetooth Clutch, sounds way easier to change than a wired one.

Also, I knew I heard the ol' Giffer right.... Lot 59, the Alhambra, "BEWARE BRAKES" doesn't sound like the best selling point.

 

In the last quarter of the auction, I think we outnumbered actual punters. My personal highlights from this event were:

 

* The auctioneer getting called out on taking bids off the wall on a Focus. "Oh, it was that lady there. You bid on the Focus didn't you? No? Oh. Let's move on"

* The point where prices went mental, sweeping from £50 for a running, tidy Fiesta, via a few £100-120 motors, to flippin' £800 for a scruffy Zafira.

* The Focus estate, in ex-plod white, absolutely pissing diesel out of the engine as it sat there with the engine off (presumably we'd have needed wellies if it was kept running)

* Someone paying a decent amount for a Merc coupe that simply had black insulating tape over all the warning lights

[Sloth in a bowl]

This week's autoshite auction game was hotly contested, with only £75 separating first and second place.

 

The categories were:

1. Louie the learner - 1400cc or less

2. George the giffer - at least 4 doors and an autobox

3. Harry's clearing house - has a tow bar or van or pickup

4. Nearly new Nigel - 06 plate or newer

5. Pot luck Paula - any car in the lot

6. British Bertie - Any classicaly British brand including Binis

7. Breeding Brenda - 5 door estate or MPV

 

 

In order from last to first we have

Cleon-Fonte

1. Lot 31 - Micra - £290

2. Lot 41 - MG ZT - £275 - Lots of shiters wanted to own this one, nice looking in dark grey

3. Lot 29 - Mitsubishi Shogan - £450 + £200 no MOT penalty - Strong money for a 200k miles car, probably only fit for breaking.

4. Lot 99 - Merc A class - £650 - the A class Merc is normally a dead cert low price, this was unusual

5. Lot 56 - Reggi Espace - £575 - Dead dashboard did not stop this one

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 68 - Peugeot 407 - £1450 - oops

Total £4090

 

Heidel-Kakao

1. Lot 505 - Ford Ka - £90

2. Lot 41 - Rover ZT - £275

3. Lot 44 - Jag S-Type - £625 - Strong for an S-type here

4. Lot 89 - Saab 9-5 - £950 - You what?

5. Lot 521 - VW Golf Gti - £350 - Bad window stickers included at no extra cost

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200 - You may see a pattern here

7. Lot 56 - Reggi Espace - £575

Total £3065

 

Sloth in a bowl

1. Lot 15 - Toyota Yaris - £140 - Sounded awful

2. Lot 32 - Fiat Punto - £185 - Suffer giffer dude, suffer

3. Lot 171 - Ford Transit - £1225 - In my defense on this pick, due to time constraints all my picks came off the catalog and I didn't see any actual cars in the lot. Thus I didn't spot that this was a car transporter.

4. Lot 46 - Picasso - £200 - You can't go wrong with picking a Picasso in this game

5. Lot 517 - Suzuki Wagon R - £190

6. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

7. Lot 123 - Picasso - £500 - You can go wrong with picking a Picasso in this game

Total £2690

 

Chaseracer

1. Lot 517 - Suzuki Wagon R - £190

2. Lot 44 - Jag S-Type - £625

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250 - You may notice that this was a popular pick

4. Lot 108 - Chevy Aveo - £650 - never heard of them

5. Lot 522 - Ford Mondeo - £375

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 28 - Fiat Doblo - £200 + £200 no MOT penalty

Total £2690

 

Six-cylinder
1. Lot 509 - Renault Clio - £150
2. Lot 506 - Mercedes CLK - £400
3. Lot 039 - Chrysler Voyager - £650
4. Lot 053 - Renault Megan convertible - £725
5. Lot 034 - Hyundai Santa Fe - £300
6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200
7. Lot 517 - Suzuki Wagon R - £190
Total £2415 

 

Junkman

1. Lot 517 - Suzuki Wagon R - £190

2. Lot 44 - Jag S-Type - £625

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

4. Lot 35 - Ford Mondeo - £375

5. Lot 522 - Ford Mondeo - £375

6. Lot 41 - Rover ZT - £275

7. Lot 34 - Hyundai Santa Fe - £300

Total £2390

 

So Far So Good

1. Lot 16 - Suzuki Alto - £290

2. Lot 114 - Vauxhall Astra - £300

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

4. Lot 57 - Vauxhall Zafira - £800

5. Lot 22 - Vauxhall Astra - £140

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 46 - Picasso - £200

Total £2160

 

Dollywobbler

1. Lot 15 - Toyota Yaris - £140

2. Lot 44 - Jag S-Type - £625

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

4. Lot 520 - Ford Focus - £285

5. Lot 512 - Mazda 323f - £100

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 115 - Mitsubishi Space Star - £140 - The only car in the auction that I had a 'want' for

Total £1740

 

3rd place - ** Pillock **

1. Lot 27 - Ford Ka - £140

2. Lot 22 - Vauxhall Astra - £140

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

4. Lot 111 - Ford Focus - £335

5. Lot 31 - Micra - £290

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 520 - Ford Focus - £285

Total £1640

 

2nd place - ** Conelrad **

1. Lot 31 - Micra - £290

2. Lot 41 - Rover ZT - £275

3. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

4. Lot 514 - Renault Clio - £260

5. Lot 15 - Toyota Yaris - £140

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 115 - Mitsubishi Space Star - £140

Total £1555

 

Winner - **** Cat (Mrs Pillock) ****

1. Lot 501 - Honda Civic - £250

2. Lot 22 - Vauxhall Astra - £140

3. Lot 28 - Fiat Doblo - £200 + £200 no MOT penalty

4. Lot 27 - Ford Ka - £140

5. Lot 17 - Ford Ka - £100

6. Lot 116 - Rover 25 - £200

7. Lot 500 - Rover 75 - £250

Total £1480

[Six-cylinder]

Mine were

Lot 509 Renault Clio £150

Lot 506 Mercedes CLK £400

Lot 039 Chrysler Voyager £650

Lot 053 Renault Megan convertible £725

Lot 034 Hyundai Santa Fe £300

Lot 116 Rover 25 £200

Lot 517 Suzuki Wagon R £190

Total £2415

[Sloth in a bowl]

Mine were

Lot 509 Renault Clio £150

Lot 506 Mercedes CLK £400

Lot 039 Chrysler Voyager £650

Lot 053 Renault Megan convertible £725

Lot 034 Hyundai Santa Fe £300

Lot 116 Rover 25 £200

Lot 517 Suzuki Wagon R £190

Total £2415

 

I've added you into the main list, Chris

[Lord Sterling]

I like the names on the new game. Will join in hopefully in the next meet. BMW has just been re-insured. Can't use works car for so many journeys.

[chaseracer]

Will join in hopefully in the next meet...

 

Good - I have a metric shitload of Mercedes mags for you.

[bub2006]

Maybe its best i didn't go. Kia sedona for 185 quid

[chaseracer]

Bub - it was F.U.C.K.E.D. mate...