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Sherpa can take it. Contains SMOLL Motorcycle. Also Cornwallness.


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Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Tomorrow morning, Longblackcoat is coming around to my place in Wanky Toryshire at 0600. He will find me already up, changing the battery in a Sherpa campervan  (the one in there is ferhooked).   Then we are off somewhere in that very van, for some reason.  The place that we are going to is both small and far away.  

 

Gay camping weekend?  Maybe.  LBC is some Geordie bloke (one of the three or four middle-class Geordies known to exist, and Kevin Whately doesn't count). LBC lives in fucking Watford (no, I have no fucking clue why, either) with a raggedy-arsed bunch of pooches and an unfeasibly hot wife.  He wears shorts in all weathers and is a right bien-pensant liberal and also a serial Mercedes botherer and BMW giver awayerer of some repute.  He R HATEZ ORL CARZ.  He especially hates Sherpa vans.   The radio in the van is shite, so all I will hear all day is LBC saying "this van is bollocks" over and over again.  

 

I have given up women for good.  Can I use the campy powers of campervanning  to lure LBC to the gay way?  Or maybe just the Westway? 

 

Sherpa_001.jpg

Posted

If we were going in the UMM you'd not (be able to) hear me saying "this van is bollocks" so count yourself lucky!

  • Like 2
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Neither Tenzing Norgay.

  • Like 5
Posted

This sounds camper than something Cyanide Steve Cazwell would do

  • Like 2
Guest Lord Sward
Posted

LBC is some Geordie bloke (one of the three or four middle-class Geordies known to exist, and Kevin Whately doesn't count). 

 

 

Who the fuck are the other two or three?  This is a regional disgrace what you are saying.

  • Like 2
Posted

Posh and geordie? Are you sure you've not been bamboozled by an interloper from somewhere like Hexham or Morpeth?

Posted

I'be been to the land of Why Aye multiple times, and worked with umpteen Geordies and a few mackems, and have yet to meet a posh 'un

Guest Lord Sward
Posted

Mackems?  Theres a term that needs moderating from this forum.

  • Like 2
Guest Hooli
Posted

Posh Geordie just means they take the washoop oot the sink before pissing don't it?

  • Like 2
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Posh Geordies eat their Greggs off paper plates, AIUI.

  • Like 2
Posted

Coffee stop of much wondermentpost-20163-0-54878500-1496990145_thumb.jpg

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Guest Breadvan72
Posted

LBC now showing his propah van driving skillz. We are on the M4.

 

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  • Like 2
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Note driving downhill.

Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Currently just past Bristol.

Guest Breadvan72
Posted

In Somerset. Not stopping at Devon.

Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Kernowshite fo' shizzle. On this gig, the only role of the Sherpa is to Sherpa.

Posted

I'm a mackem. I have a Daimler and a BMW. Am I middle class? Nope. Am I business class? Nope. I'm first class... crack on lads..

  • Like 2
Posted

There are no posh Geordies, like there are no posh scousers. Some may have money but it don't make them posh. Can we see picture of a tea break in the back of the sherpa . Or in Devon a cream tea.

  • Like 1
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Hijack welcome! We are now in actual Cornwall. We are overtaking the fuck out of 90s Rennacampaz.

 

post-5528-0-11387100-1497072561_thumb.jpg

 

 

  • Like 2
Posted

BV refusing a cream tea and instead nomming a Cornish pasty.post-20163-0-05627300-1497002185_thumb.jpg

  • Like 4
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Take two blokes. Let each bloke be a fuckwit. Put such blokes in a van. Make the fuel tank be SMOLL. Make the fuel gauge be BROKKEN. Drive 205 miles flat out at 70. Guess what might happen?

Well, one hour later Matt the AA dude has sloshed in five litres of yummy Earthjuice. To make it vaut le detour for Matt, I bought a battery for good measure, and who cares that much cheaper in Halford's?

So, an hour behind schedule, we are near Indian Queens, or somewhere. Gnomeworld is the local attraction. I shit you not.

#clueless numby fuckers.

Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Now in traffic jam between Truro and Falmouth.

  • Like 1
Guest Breadvan72
Posted

Traffic caused by Hot Fuzz style incident. No shootaz or Beardy Isalamotwats involved.

 

Crashed Volvo content.

  • Like 1
Posted

Wtf is going on here?

Posted

Shame, I stumbled across some real Sherpashite down west the other day.. Soz if this is thread hijack btw

 

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Really need a pair of Pilot rear door windows if anybody find any lying about!

Posted

Feel free to pop in to North Country ,near Redruth for a cuppa guys

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