Shite when it was just shit.

[Negative Creep]

Around 2002ish I was given the "pleasure" of driving a Lada Riva. Even though I was used to Novas, AXs and mk.4 Escorts I was utterky shocked at how bad it was to drive. Must have only been about 6 years old at the time but it was utterly shagged.

 

 

Would have one now mind

[Taff]

God, where to start? Dad was/is careful with his beer tokens, almost to the point of miserly and as such he “didn’t do depreciation, sonâ€Â. This lead to all manner of automotive dross, an affliction which has sadly rubbed off on me.

 

First motor was a Fiat 128 in fetching red with matching rust, this lasted about 9 months before I totalled it and went out and spunked £125 on a ’73 Austin 1300gt. That went like stink and turned left like it was on rails, due to leaking hydra-gas suspension. This was too far gone rust-wise for an MoT so a Mk 2 Capri 2l sport was bought for 3oo bar, corsican blue with dealer-fitted primer wheel arch’s. When the passenger door fell off, I decided to chop it in against a triumph spitfire. Bear in mind the Capri was missing a door, and the spit had no boot-floor (or spare wheel, which on a spit is mounted on the bootfloor).

 

Dad’s collection? Jesus, it would fill a page but chief amongst them is a 1978 Renault 12 in blue (also with primer arches, squared off nicely were the masking tape was). It was 1200cc auto, to give you an idea of the awesome power of that beast. Plus Dad had a fetish for bloody Princess’s and not the sexy blonde Diana type either. 6 of them he had, along with two Ambassadors. Hated them, I learnt to drive in one and let me tell you, I can three-point turn anything as a result. The twat.

[dieselnutjob]

I used to run 305s. I had six of them over the years I think. They were tough and reliable cars. 305 is weapons grade shite now.

[scooters]

I had a mint giffer spec 1984 A Reg Nissan Sunny Saloon 5 door! (posh or what) - it had a mint beige interior and even had an aftermarket beige 'brogue' style steering wheel cover! In the glovebox were found a pair od brown, string backed DRIVIN GLUVS!!!

 

This was in 1994 when I didn't know any better. and I sold it to a banger racer - mates took the piss out of me but it never broke down and never let me down.

 

I jizz my jammies deaming about that old deamchod nowadays

[Pete-M]

Around 1992 I bought a one owner, V reg, Datsun Bluebird. 66k on the clock, never ever been serviced, yellow with a truly hideous orangey brown interior. Cost me £60 with a load of tax'n'test. Wouldn't go because the points had snapped. When it did go the clutch was fucked.

 

Cost £40 for a new clutch and a few quid for the points. Fresh Asda 20/50 in it and off it went. Bloody thing wouldn't die, and whilst not being in any way lovable it just kept on going.

 

Same shape as this, but with standard wheels and the front six inches of bonnet held together with copious amounts of black gaffa tape. Consider it the budget alternative to a car bra.

 

 

I'm sure the interior in mine has half vinyl on the seats. To match the dash.

[meggersdog]

Ok I'm in.

First up would be a Lada Riva,tough as old boots these things.A rusty driver's front wing,rattling timing chain and heavy steering were it's faults.Sold it on for a profit when the tax ran out.This was replaced with a Vauxhall Carlton that had a tapping noise from the engine.Apparently one of the brass screws that hold the jets in came loose and sucked through the carb and was embedded atop number three piston.After a few weeks the tap became a rattle so ( and I've never been this lucky before or since) I drove to the workshop removed number three 'plug and revved the engine.Eventually something pinged on the bonnet.I stopped the engine,replaced the 'plug and the noise had gone.I sold this 40 quid motor on for a vast profit and bought a Renault 18 TL .This car went everywhere.It got clamped in the car-park at the side of Rock City , Nottingham when we were at a Buzzcocks gig.Next up I went all small commercial.My first pick-up was a small Dodge,the one with the Simca front end.I didn't own this very long and replaced it with what turned out to be a very rotten Subaru truck.In the early nineties these things were still really cool but mine was the povo spec two wheel drive one.Didn't own a mig welder back then so it eventually got scrapped.The first small van was an Ital .Going from a super cool Subaru down to an Ital van wasn't the best move but it was used as my removal van when I moved into my house.A few months later I sold it to my new neighbour.My next small van was a Fiat Fiorino.No not the Uno based one,this is autoshite after-all, the original 127 based van.If you left it standing for more than a day one of the calipers would seize.Mid to late nineties it was Peugeot 305 estates,first a petrol then diesels including a van.Late 90's early 2000's I was working on narrowboats and fitting lots of Prima engines so the weapon of choice had to be a Meastro diesel van.

[Andrew353w]

With everyone else on the Ladas! My first one was a new "M" reg (1995) 1500 Riva, in (sort of) purple. Bought for £200 from a mate in Exeter & driven straight back to London it performed perfectly for about 6 months, after which I sold it to a couple of girls who wanted to do the Plymough Dakar rally in it. Oddly, the rally was organised by ther guy from whom I'd bought the Lada in the first place! AND it made it to west Africa! I have the full story somewhere, as the girls published it in a magazine & sent me a copy. Must dig it out & share it... My latest one, the 1977 barn find, is doing daily runs to work & causing some amusement in the staff car park...

 

Had FSOs as daily hacks and I quite liked them. Agreed about the seating-very comfortable and I liked the soft springing, too. I've read other comments about the dodgy gearboxes in these cars, but the 125p I drove seemed fine! It was a 5 speed "E" reg 1300 one, which didn't like unleaded fuel & eventually failed the emissions as the valves were mullered. I'd (mistakenly) assumed that, like Ladas, they had hardended valves (they don't...) (Ladas DO-strange!)

[406V6]

Most members of this forum who were car owners in the 80s will have owned sh*te as there weren’t that many cars around that would have been considered decent. Those German so-called premium brands were around in the 80s but their sales were a fraction of todays high figures.

 

I was the proud owner of a beige (sandglow) Allegro 1300 with brown seats which may have have had totally sh*t styling but it also had shiny paint, little rust, and despite the bad reputation of these cars mine wasn’t all-aggro and only let me down once when the alternator failed and the battery drained on a journey so it wouldn’t start the next day. Apart from being totally gutless at any speed (80mph in your dreams only) it drove nicely and was comfortable. In the same circumstances I would have one again although with the benefit of hindsight would choose the 1500 engine and live with the penalty of the sh*t gear change that came with the E series. At least no-one wanted to steal it.

[oman5]

My first car was a morris Ital 1.3 SL...shitest of the shite, especially in giffer spec "champagne beige" colour. (kind of like condensed milk colour) It was only 7 years old but still only cost 200 quid, something to do with the rust hole on top of the front wing you could keep wine bottles in, probably. it tolerated some serious abuse before the engine shat its bottom end out..the day AFTER I'd part ex'd it for an everyman cavalier mk2

moving on a few years...my sister had recovered from her period of financial embaressment and wanted shot of her banger, A Talbot Solara. living in windsor it was unsaleable, even the scrapman wanted paying to collect it so as it was road legal she gave it to me FOC. It was the top spec GLS model with huge teddy fur seats, alloy wheels, electric everything and unusually for a 1984 car, even a trip computer. actually a decent motor despite the dire image, pretty quick and very comfy. sadly after six months the MOT tester pretty much told me to piss off as soon as he laid eyes on it. not much actually wrong with it but being worth the square root of sod all and me having been offered a cortina crusader I weighed it in.

I owned a lada riva..briefly..you can go on about how tough they are, reliable, built to survive a siberian winter, etc, but they always were, and still are SHIT, even when brand new. By the 80's you didn't even have the compensation that the tool kit included a starting handle, inspection lamp and a stirrup type tyre pump as the '70s ones did.

I also did the Princess/wedge thing. in the late 80's/early 90's these were absolutely worthless as soon as the MOT ran out.

I was given a free 1979 2.0 HLS with rotten bodywork but mint interior and engine, used it until the MOT was up then bought a 1979 2200 HLS with a cracked block but mint body and swapped all the good bits onto it. The Princess 2 was never shit, it was acutally a well sorted car, great handling, reliable, more comfy and roomy than a Granada, but the range was badly tarnished from the early models (on which the driveshafts broke and the engines fell out) and never recovered. a shame they are now so rare, they didn't even rust that badly.

[John F]

Most members of this forum who were car owners in the 80s will have owned sh*te as there weren’t that many cars around that would have been considered decent.

 

 

The three cars I owned in the 1980s - two Mark II Escort 2-doors and a Mk 5 Cortina Ghia in spotless Jewish Racing Gold - would cost considerably more nowadays than I paid for them at the time. This being the case, I'm not sure that they can really be classified as shite. Except perhaps the Cortina.

[Negative Creep]

Most members of this forum who were car owners in the 80s will have owned sh*te as there weren’t that many cars around that would have been considered decent.

 

 

The three cars I owned in the 1980s - two Mark II Escort 2-doors and a Mk 5 Cortina Ghia in spotless Jewish Racing Gold - would cost considerably more nowadays than I paid for them at the time. This being the case, I'm not sure that they can really be classified as shite. Except perhaps the Cortina.

 

 

gold = shite

[John F]

Most members of this forum who were car owners in the 80s will have owned sh*te as there weren’t that many cars around that would have been considered decent.

 

 

The three cars I owned in the 1980s - two Mark II Escort 2-doors and a Mk 5 Cortina Ghia in spotless Jewish Racing Gold - would cost considerably more nowadays than I paid for them at the time. This being the case, I'm not sure that they can really be classified as shite. Except perhaps the Cortina.

 

 

gold = shite

 

Fantastic. OK then, chalk me up one shite Cortina.

[Station]

I had a mk1 arched 2 door Escort with a roll cage that had rear end crumplage I bought off a mate and a mk2 1.1 Escort both in white, first one was scrapped because I couldn't repair damage, the second scrapped when the axle failed on entrance to the M53.

Also had a 3500 SD1 followed by two Rover 213's, since 2000 have only owned 'hot hatches' really, including my current Felicia 1.3

[Pete-M]

 

gold = shite

 

Fantastic. OK then, chalk me up one shite Cortina.

 

I'll have a gold 2.0 Ghia Mk4 too.