Guess why the heap is cheap?

[scaryoldcortina]

timing chain failure

[Pillock]

It's a TDCI. The Engine Management light is not on. It would drive onto a trailer but the seller advises not driving long distance.

[Richard]

I'll try the DMF to get it out of the way.

[scaryoldcortina]

It's only running on three pots and has back pressure that would disgrace a steam engine.

[Pillock]

It's had a new starter motor and three new injectors recently. Seller says it's in limp mode.

 

It's a "no" for DMF and timing chain.

[scaryoldcortina]

I refer the honorable member to my previous answer.

[cort16]

The 4th injector needs replaced

[cort16]

Hole in the block

[Pillock]

DING DING DING to Lord Scary.

 

In a genius move, the buyer has spunked three quarters of a fortune on having three injectors replaced and the vehicle has rewarded this mingebaggery by reminding him to either give 100%, or nothing. 

Ford are currently offering 3 pot engines in many cars, this is not one of them.

[scaryoldcortina]

Oh hell, not again! I was about to go to bed, anyone else want a go? I won't be around to answer questions.

[Richard]

Three injectors would be a four figure billl, wouldn't it? 21st century cars terrify me.

[Pillock]

No, three injectors would be a claw through the windows and make sure you've taken your sunglasses out the glovebox because DESTINATION BEANCANZ.

[scaryoldcortina]

sad thing is his problem is probably a cracked piston.

[twosmoke300]

More than likely . Seen several transits / mondeos and x types with a misfire and heavy knocking which turned out to be just that .

[sierraman]

Owned by murderer? Going on the wheels its the 2.5 ghia, so tax is more than £30 so its worthless. Faultwise if its the 2.0 then possibly the rings are fucked.

[scaryoldcortina]

OK, lazing on a sunday afternoon, let's have another go at this then!

 

 

2003 Ford Fiesta 1.4 Zetec "sideways" tested until almost the middle of next month and located near wembley.

 

Seller says "The car is to good to scrap" but what else is making it only £250.

 

Clue - Seller may very well be a human potato.

[Richard]

Some kind of front suspension problem? It looks as if the front wheel has a bit of positive camber.

[anonymous user]

The smell of the dead body in the boot has pervaded the whole of the interior and maggots are now crawling out of the seats

[scaryoldcortina]

Not mentioned in the advert if it does.

[Richard]

Chips on the windscreen? Dodgy synchromash? Boiling up?

[cort16]

No clutch

[scaryoldcortina]

Chips on the windscreen? Dodgy synchromash? Boiling up?

 

Excellent but no.

 

Cort, not the clutch either - ad says "start and drive"

[cort16]

Rear axle bushes have given up and moved to Poland ?

[scaryoldcortina]

No, it's something that the spud owner would notice.

[Richard]

Are you talking about an actual potato or just somebody who is a bit dense?

 

Infestation of aphids?

[cort16]

It's been involved in a low speed crash with an escaped elephant ?

[scaryoldcortina]

A bit dense, and possibly a little odd too. I blame

Ian dury song which Autofive keeps playing in the garage.

[scaryoldcortina]

No crash damage (I think)

[Richard]

Misfire?

[scaryoldcortina]

Yes, if that's what this means...

 

start and drive bat lost a power luck like a clout fault, engine light on in the dash is co2 sensor